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Louis love?

The fight

Katies' pov:
I woke up with louis beside me in what looks to be his bedroom. My head was killing me. So i walked into his bathroom which him and lizzy shared and got some aspirin, just as i grabed it, it sliped out my hands. "Oh i hope that wasn't to loud. And it was Lizzy and Louis both ran into the bathroom. "Its ok im fine." " someone has a bit of a hangover." Louis said. " louis shut the hell up." I said basically growling. Lizzy joined in and said " you both should, katie i thrusted you and you went and fucked my brother anyways!" And she stormed off angry. All i could was say im sorry lizzy" i ran into louis's bedroom and slipped on my cloths. I grabed my keys and drove to the coast. I just needed to be alone.
louis pov:
lizzy just yelled at katie and she ran off.. So i ran after her... I drove to her house but she wasnt there where could she be?!?!?

Comments

Oh okay lol whew! Im not used to giving feedback but I was told in order to be a good writer not only do I need to accept feedback but I need to give feedback lol
@Chanel_Needs_1D
Im not taking it the wrong way i love hearing feedback frim you guys it makes me a better writer
Makayla_horan Makayla_horan
7/3/13
Welcome, and again please don't take that the wrong way, I loved it :) I just wanted to help out a little...
@Chanel_Needs_1D
Thanks and ill try to better with my new story!
Makayla_horan Makayla_horan
7/3/13
Umm dint take this the wrong way, I lived the storyline, like how you had the plan going ant things...I just think you rushed it a bit too much....it felt too rushed, like there was no relax moments, all of them were sooo intense....I feel like, if you were to add some relaxed parts that build up suspicion, maybe you wouldn't have gotten bored?