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Louis love?

Me&niall&lou?

Katie pov:
After niall drove us to his apartment ( which he shared with lou ) we just sat there and talked. " so what about you and lou... did you makeup with him?" Niall said. "Um no.... But can we please not talk about this?" I said. " sure katie if that makes you happy......... HEY!! do you wanna go swimming?" Niall asked. "Um i dont have a swimming suit...." I stated. "Oh well thats ok ........ I dont have a clean one anyway.. Skinny dipping?" Niall said. "OK!!! Lets go!!!" I shouted. We walked fown to the pool..

Lou pov:
i was about to walk in when i heard katie and niall talking. "Skinny fipping maybe?" I heard footsteps so i ran... I took the stairs thinking they would take the elevator... I was wrong ... Oh great so i ran faster..... Till i got to the pool then i hid in the bushes.

katie pov:
"Look niall!!! Theres lights above the pool!"
"I know katie i put them there -smiles- and yes katie its beautiful... Just like you"
i took off my cloths and shouted "Last ones in is a rotten piece of pie!!" Just as i finished my sentence niall had jumped in. "NO FAIR!!! I DIDNT SAY GO!!" "Haha to bad katie." I ran and jumped in. Niall splashed me so i splashed him back and well we had a splash fight.

niall pov:
katie was talking and so i decided to jump in. "NOT FAIR!!!" "Haha to bad katie." I replayed. Then we had a splash fight... In the middle of the fight i could keep from thinking how hot she looked.

lou pov:
oooooh katie looks so hot.... I want some of that. I thought. So.. I put my hand in my pants and started moving it up and down my dick. Soon after i was hard. I continued to thrust.

Katie pov:
"niall can i tell you something?" "Sure katie." "Niall... I love you" "oh katie i love you too." I kissed him. Soon our lips were in sunc. He

Comments

Oh okay lol whew! Im not used to giving feedback but I was told in order to be a good writer not only do I need to accept feedback but I need to give feedback lol
@Chanel_Needs_1D
Im not taking it the wrong way i love hearing feedback frim you guys it makes me a better writer
Makayla_horan Makayla_horan
7/3/13
Welcome, and again please don't take that the wrong way, I loved it :) I just wanted to help out a little...
@Chanel_Needs_1D
Thanks and ill try to better with my new story!
Makayla_horan Makayla_horan
7/3/13
Umm dint take this the wrong way, I lived the storyline, like how you had the plan going ant things...I just think you rushed it a bit too much....it felt too rushed, like there was no relax moments, all of them were sooo intense....I feel like, if you were to add some relaxed parts that build up suspicion, maybe you wouldn't have gotten bored?