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Louis love?

2nd hospital check

Katie pov: we arived right on time.... We ran into the room just as the nurse said "miss santamogo". "You are 2 months pregrnant right?" She asked as we entered the room. "yes i am." We walked back to the room and she put gel on my stomach. She hooked up the thingy and dtuff you know. She said the worst thing she could have said. "Miss santamogo theres nothing on the picture... Your babies are dead. Im sorry..." She said as she walked out the room. I just cried and lou came and hugged me. "Katie im sorry but.. It ok." "NO ITS NOT OK I KILLED MY BABIES... NOT ONE BUT TWO... I KILLED OUR BABIES!!! SO ITS NO OK!" I screamed. "But katie you didnt mean to did you?" I just cried i couldnt take it..

Louis pov:
katie its ok its not you falt." She continued crying so i hugged her.....
*5 mins. Later*
i lifted her up by her chin. "Katie look at me... Its not your falt ok know that and remember that ok.. Promise me!"
"I promise." All i could do was hug her and i gave her a small kiss on the cheek.

Notes

Click on the rectangle for the outfit if it doesnt show ok? Haha... And how sad she had a miscarriage :'(

Comments

Oh okay lol whew! Im not used to giving feedback but I was told in order to be a good writer not only do I need to accept feedback but I need to give feedback lol
@Chanel_Needs_1D
Im not taking it the wrong way i love hearing feedback frim you guys it makes me a better writer
Makayla_horan Makayla_horan
7/3/13
Welcome, and again please don't take that the wrong way, I loved it :) I just wanted to help out a little...
@Chanel_Needs_1D
Thanks and ill try to better with my new story!
Makayla_horan Makayla_horan
7/3/13
Umm dint take this the wrong way, I lived the storyline, like how you had the plan going ant things...I just think you rushed it a bit too much....it felt too rushed, like there was no relax moments, all of them were sooo intense....I feel like, if you were to add some relaxed parts that build up suspicion, maybe you wouldn't have gotten bored?