Good Intentions

MEGHANS’S POV

I run into the laundry and find mom.
“Zayn. The name Zayn. He said it as he woke up” I whisper loudly to her.
She drops what she is doing grabs the bottle of pills and a small glass of water as she exits the kitchen.
I stand outside of the bedroom listening. I hear him decline the pill and say he wants to work with dad after lunch. I heave a sigh of relief, I fear he is getting addicted to the pills. He at times accepts them too readily.

We eat lunch and Will asks what work needs to be done today and is told some of the cows injured themselves in a ditch so they will have to be attended to, the local vet should be heading our way as we speak. He nods and continues to eat.
I watch as they get in the truck together and head towards the barn.
Will is acting strangely, strange as in somewhat normal. The last time he was somewhat coherent he still had a dazed and confused look to him. This time, he has a look in his eyes, one of determination.

I finish my school work and help mom in the kitchen getting dinner ready.

I turn as they both come in. He looks at me as he takes his boots off and put them in the plastic bin. He knows I know. I watch his movements, he’s fine. Little to no drugs are in his system. I can tell he has really pushed himself today. He is intentionally working the meds out of his system. His steps are those of the one I watched day in and day out in LA.
After dinner he goes to his room and takes a shower. I hear him exit his bathroom and give him some time. I knock lightly and he tells me to enter. I shut the door behind me quietly so as not to draw attention to us speaking.
He is in front of me in two steps, “Tell me what the hell is going on here.” He whispers not two inches from my face.
“I cant”
“Cant or wont?
I don’t know what to say to that. None of this has been rehearsed or planned out.
“Please don’t, just stop”
“No! I want to know who I am and why I’m here. I do know that much. None of this is familiar because its not me.”
“Would you believe me if I told you that I really don’t know anything about you?”
He steps back and reads me and sees that I’m telling him the truth.
I can tell he’s mad, his eyes turn a dark shade of green.
“Would you tell me if you knew?”
“I don’t know, I guess thats why none of us know”
“As in . .”
“Me nor mom know anything about you”
He turns and curses fly from his mouth, words I have never heard but know by the way he says them what they imply. His hand goes to his head, his fingers go through his hair.
“My hair used to be longer, that I do remember”
“Yes, it did. With curls”
He laughs a little and smiles.
“Thank you” He pulls me close and hugs me. It’s a sibling hug, but I could get used to this. I know he is not my brother and I’m sure he knows that also.

I have a feeling we are in this together, alone. I have to help him. Somehow.

Notes