I Don't Understand
He Has Your Eyes
Saturday, 6/13/09
We're half an hour into the car trip, and I begin to wonder why my parents had to get tickets for an airport that's a two hour drive away. Are there any closer options?
We're following Mom in Dad's Jeep, but Damian's driving now, because Dad's fast asleep in the back. And by fast asleep, I mean buckled in, sitting up, and snoring. Profusely. I'm sitting shotgun, and I've been trying to keep my mind off of Johnny. I've found some mild amusement in watching the silhouettes of my two sisters through the rear window of the suburban, ahead of us. I kind of wonder if they're even buckled in; they're bouncing around and apparently having some sort of crazy dance party. "Hey Lina?" I turn and glare at Damian, and he glances over from watching the road, and looks a bit surprised at my face "Woah sorry geez. I mean 'Daisy'." He says half-sarcastically, and than continues "Could you call Mom on your cell? I need to stop for gas, and it's about lunch time, anyhow." I sigh and grab my sling bag from the floor of the jeep. A few moments and some shuffling around produce my cheap Verizon Cosmos phone, and I sigh again. I hate my phone. Dad said I can get a better phone when I want to pay for it myself. I don't get it. I punch in the digits and soon my phone is ringing. A bit later; "Hey Damian? She's not picking up." I scowl at the Suburban ahead of us. Kenzie and Leigh are still dancing. It goes to voicemail and I hang up. Dad's still snoring. Damian grunts and reaches over, gesturing for me to give him my phone. I hesitantly hand it over. Glancing back and forth between the road and the keypad, he puts in some numbers and presses call. The dancing in the Suburban stops. Huh? "Hey Brayleigh! Could you hand your phone to Mom?" Wait a minute, wait a minute, since when does my 12 year old sister have a phone? "Hey Mom. -- Yeah I need to stop for gas. -- Did you bring lunch? -- Okay. By the way, Angelina said you weren't answering your phone? -- Well did you look under the seats? -- Oh. In your purse? -- On the dash? -- You have got to be kidding me. -- Too late now. Sorry Mom. -- So we'll stop at the next exit? -- Okay. -- Love you too. Bye." I crack up. Damian. He's too cute. It sounds like Mom forgot her phone, though. "So. Damian. 'Love you too'?" he looks annoyed "Well I do." "Fair enough. Did Mom make lunch?" I say hopefully. I just really want Chipotle right now, and if Mom packed lunch than we won't be buying any food. But she probably did, because my Mom's super thrifty. "No, Dad made lunch." Damian chuckles a little. Oh No. No no. There's only one type of food Dad can make, and that's packaged/boxed/frozen/canned, anything pre-made. But I mean, he can also warm up leftovers, make sandwiches, as well as a pretty good salad. While that's not bad most of the time, he's been trying new things lately. Like making food with ingredients. And appliances. The finished food always looks good, but it never tastes good. And than you just gotta put on a good face and pretend to like it. But he always looks hurt when nobody goes for seconds. "Uh, Damian, do you know what Dad tried to make for lunch?" He shrugs his shoulders and a voice comes from the back "I made Grandma's avocado quesadillas and this new macadamia cookie recipe I found." Dad's voice swelled with pride. So he's awake now, then? But I couldn't help it, I had to poke some fun "Oh so that's what that burnt smell was this morning, hm?" Damian and I cracked up and he offered a high-five. But Dad's face fell, and he was sulking in the back. Damian looked up into the rear-view mirror and said "It's okay, Dad. You're getting better every time, yeah?" But Damian was still smiling. Dad still didn't say anything. Guess I kind of injured him. Um, oops? An exit was coming up, and I watched Mom pull the suburban off onto the ramp. Damian pulled off after her, and once we got off the ramp, we scanned both sides of the road for a gas station and somewhere grassy to sit. Damian still had my phone, so he called Brayleigh again to talk to Mom. Soon we came up on huge truck stop, and Damian told Mom we would stop there. I watched Mom park the Suburban, and than she and my sisters piled out and flopped on the grass. Damian stopped the Jeep next to the Suburban so Dad and I could get out. I thanked him, and got out. Oh. Where are my boots. "Damian, did you get my boots?!" He doesn't say anything. I'm right on the edge of panicking. Dad climbed out the other side of the Jeep and walks over behind me "I grabbed a pair of boots from the lawn in the back." "Where did you put them?" Still panicking "In the back of the Jeep." I shut the door, and padded to the back. Damian popped open the trunk from his seat in the front, and I started digging frantically. Where are they, where are they, where are"AHA! Thanks, Daddy!" I shut the trunk, and clutched my boots. Damian drove over to get some gas. There was a big grassy hill next to the truck stop, and Mom was fluffing out a big old comforter to use as a picnic blanket. I tossed my boots in the grass and walked over to grab our blue cooler from the passenger seat of the Suburban, than carried it to where Mom was. She kneeled on the edge of the blanket and patted the ground beside her, gesturing for me to sit down. I plopped the cooler in front of her and she looked at me. "Are you ready to see what's inside?" there was a twinkle in her eye, I was wary. "Uhm. That depends..." She flipped open the cooler, and it smelled... Good? "I co-piloted Dad's lunch. I think he's actually learning how to cook!" What? "No way! Really?" Mom nodded her head, and than Dad walked over. "Noelle, Angelina said she smelled burnt this morning." Mom cocked her head as if in thought. "That must have been the one quesadilla that dropped off the pan. Her sleeping bag was set up in the living room, and that's right next to the kitchen." she shrugged her shoulders and Dad sat down on the other side of her. I got up and walked over to my sisters. "Hey Kenzie, do you know where Dan is?" "I don't know. Maybe he's in the truck stop store thingy." Brayleigh laughed at her use of the word 'thingy' and they went back to their cloud-watching. I pulled on my boots, and started walking over to the "truck stop store thingy".
I was debating if I should buy myself a candy bar, or ice cream, when I looked up and saw a blonde boy my age, who was holding hands with a girl. They were walking between the aisles of snacks and I was lazily watching them. They looked so happy, and I was currently feeling as if I would never have that. Than I accidentally made brief eye contact with the boy and I was frozen. He had the same eyes as my Johnny. I shook my head. He's not my Johnny anymore. I felt dizzy and tears began to sting my still-sore eyes. I ran out of the truck stop, and I could feel the young couple's eyes following me.
I was lying on my stomach in the grass, with my head rested on my arms. I was watching my family laugh and eat together. But I had told them I wasn't hungry. That was only a half-truth. My stomach was empty. But my heart was emptier, and I had lost my appetite. I walked over and asked Dad for his keys. He gave them to me, and I unlocked the Jeep. I climbed into the front seat and turned the keys in the ignition. For a minute I just sat there with my foot on the gas and my hands on the wheel, watching my family. I wanted to go back home. But you don't have a home. And with that thought, I climbed back between the front seats and sat down in the rear seat. I fiddled with the rear controls until the air conditioning was comfortable, and than reached into the front for my sling bag. I dug around until I found my MP3 player and my earbuds, and just pressed shuffle on my nighttime playlist. Soon I was fast asleep.
We're half an hour into the car trip, and I begin to wonder why my parents had to get tickets for an airport that's a two hour drive away. Are there any closer options?
We're following Mom in Dad's Jeep, but Damian's driving now, because Dad's fast asleep in the back. And by fast asleep, I mean buckled in, sitting up, and snoring. Profusely. I'm sitting shotgun, and I've been trying to keep my mind off of Johnny. I've found some mild amusement in watching the silhouettes of my two sisters through the rear window of the suburban, ahead of us. I kind of wonder if they're even buckled in; they're bouncing around and apparently having some sort of crazy dance party. "Hey Lina?" I turn and glare at Damian, and he glances over from watching the road, and looks a bit surprised at my face "Woah sorry geez. I mean 'Daisy'." He says half-sarcastically, and than continues "Could you call Mom on your cell? I need to stop for gas, and it's about lunch time, anyhow." I sigh and grab my sling bag from the floor of the jeep. A few moments and some shuffling around produce my cheap Verizon Cosmos phone, and I sigh again. I hate my phone. Dad said I can get a better phone when I want to pay for it myself. I don't get it. I punch in the digits and soon my phone is ringing. A bit later; "Hey Damian? She's not picking up." I scowl at the Suburban ahead of us. Kenzie and Leigh are still dancing. It goes to voicemail and I hang up. Dad's still snoring. Damian grunts and reaches over, gesturing for me to give him my phone. I hesitantly hand it over. Glancing back and forth between the road and the keypad, he puts in some numbers and presses call. The dancing in the Suburban stops. Huh? "Hey Brayleigh! Could you hand your phone to Mom?" Wait a minute, wait a minute, since when does my 12 year old sister have a phone? "Hey Mom. -- Yeah I need to stop for gas. -- Did you bring lunch? -- Okay. By the way, Angelina said you weren't answering your phone? -- Well did you look under the seats? -- Oh. In your purse? -- On the dash? -- You have got to be kidding me. -- Too late now. Sorry Mom. -- So we'll stop at the next exit? -- Okay. -- Love you too. Bye." I crack up. Damian. He's too cute. It sounds like Mom forgot her phone, though. "So. Damian. 'Love you too'?" he looks annoyed "Well I do." "Fair enough. Did Mom make lunch?" I say hopefully. I just really want Chipotle right now, and if Mom packed lunch than we won't be buying any food. But she probably did, because my Mom's super thrifty. "No, Dad made lunch." Damian chuckles a little. Oh No. No no. There's only one type of food Dad can make, and that's packaged/boxed/frozen/canned, anything pre-made. But I mean, he can also warm up leftovers, make sandwiches, as well as a pretty good salad. While that's not bad most of the time, he's been trying new things lately. Like making food with ingredients. And appliances. The finished food always looks good, but it never tastes good. And than you just gotta put on a good face and pretend to like it. But he always looks hurt when nobody goes for seconds. "Uh, Damian, do you know what Dad tried to make for lunch?" He shrugs his shoulders and a voice comes from the back "I made Grandma's avocado quesadillas and this new macadamia cookie recipe I found." Dad's voice swelled with pride. So he's awake now, then? But I couldn't help it, I had to poke some fun "Oh so that's what that burnt smell was this morning, hm?" Damian and I cracked up and he offered a high-five. But Dad's face fell, and he was sulking in the back. Damian looked up into the rear-view mirror and said "It's okay, Dad. You're getting better every time, yeah?" But Damian was still smiling. Dad still didn't say anything. Guess I kind of injured him. Um, oops? An exit was coming up, and I watched Mom pull the suburban off onto the ramp. Damian pulled off after her, and once we got off the ramp, we scanned both sides of the road for a gas station and somewhere grassy to sit. Damian still had my phone, so he called Brayleigh again to talk to Mom. Soon we came up on huge truck stop, and Damian told Mom we would stop there. I watched Mom park the Suburban, and than she and my sisters piled out and flopped on the grass. Damian stopped the Jeep next to the Suburban so Dad and I could get out. I thanked him, and got out. Oh. Where are my boots. "Damian, did you get my boots?!" He doesn't say anything. I'm right on the edge of panicking. Dad climbed out the other side of the Jeep and walks over behind me "I grabbed a pair of boots from the lawn in the back." "Where did you put them?" Still panicking "In the back of the Jeep." I shut the door, and padded to the back. Damian popped open the trunk from his seat in the front, and I started digging frantically. Where are they, where are they, where are"AHA! Thanks, Daddy!" I shut the trunk, and clutched my boots. Damian drove over to get some gas. There was a big grassy hill next to the truck stop, and Mom was fluffing out a big old comforter to use as a picnic blanket. I tossed my boots in the grass and walked over to grab our blue cooler from the passenger seat of the Suburban, than carried it to where Mom was. She kneeled on the edge of the blanket and patted the ground beside her, gesturing for me to sit down. I plopped the cooler in front of her and she looked at me. "Are you ready to see what's inside?" there was a twinkle in her eye, I was wary. "Uhm. That depends..." She flipped open the cooler, and it smelled... Good? "I co-piloted Dad's lunch. I think he's actually learning how to cook!" What? "No way! Really?" Mom nodded her head, and than Dad walked over. "Noelle, Angelina said she smelled burnt this morning." Mom cocked her head as if in thought. "That must have been the one quesadilla that dropped off the pan. Her sleeping bag was set up in the living room, and that's right next to the kitchen." she shrugged her shoulders and Dad sat down on the other side of her. I got up and walked over to my sisters. "Hey Kenzie, do you know where Dan is?" "I don't know. Maybe he's in the truck stop store thingy." Brayleigh laughed at her use of the word 'thingy' and they went back to their cloud-watching. I pulled on my boots, and started walking over to the "truck stop store thingy".
I was debating if I should buy myself a candy bar, or ice cream, when I looked up and saw a blonde boy my age, who was holding hands with a girl. They were walking between the aisles of snacks and I was lazily watching them. They looked so happy, and I was currently feeling as if I would never have that. Than I accidentally made brief eye contact with the boy and I was frozen. He had the same eyes as my Johnny. I shook my head. He's not my Johnny anymore. I felt dizzy and tears began to sting my still-sore eyes. I ran out of the truck stop, and I could feel the young couple's eyes following me.
I was lying on my stomach in the grass, with my head rested on my arms. I was watching my family laugh and eat together. But I had told them I wasn't hungry. That was only a half-truth. My stomach was empty. But my heart was emptier, and I had lost my appetite. I walked over and asked Dad for his keys. He gave them to me, and I unlocked the Jeep. I climbed into the front seat and turned the keys in the ignition. For a minute I just sat there with my foot on the gas and my hands on the wheel, watching my family. I wanted to go back home. But you don't have a home. And with that thought, I climbed back between the front seats and sat down in the rear seat. I fiddled with the rear controls until the air conditioning was comfortable, and than reached into the front for my sling bag. I dug around until I found my MP3 player and my earbuds, and just pressed shuffle on my nighttime playlist. Soon I was fast asleep.
Notes
So. second chapter. what do you think? My writing style might be a little different than most people's on here, but I hope you like it!
Keep reading, Daisies!
@AyeeeBriii
Thank you so much!
8/15/14