The Night I Met Harry

Winter:
“Just for one day. I want to clear my head, and I’ll be by tomorrow to get her.”

Linda:
“Sure honey, of course.”

I hope she understands that talking isn’t what I’m in the mood for right now, and doesn’t mention his name to me.

Winter:
“Thanks mom, I’m going to go now okay?”

I hold the phone tight to keep myself from breaking down before the end of the call.

Linda:
“Alright. Just call if you need anything. You know I’m always here.”

Winter:
“Okay.”

I lay the phone down against the counter and watch my hands as they tremor under my life’s circumstances. I close my eyes and just try to calm with my inhaler in my grips. It doesn’t seem that I need it now and I just focused on keeping it that way. Another few minutes and it’s the phone again. I turn it over to check for the caller and am quite disappointed to see his name there. I hated that I couldn’t just move on with my life and never see him again. I almost wished Riley was entirely mine so that I wasn’t tied to him for the rest of my life. I decline the call quickly and carry myself to the living room to curl into the couch with a warm blanket.

--

We’re at the start of a new month and I have to remind myself to double check all of the rooms before moving day’s here. I guess I’ll do that later. A knock on the door tells me that he’s here and I head down with the car seat and her bag in my hands in routine. I open the door without thinking too much and immediately hand her over.

Harry:
“Hey.”

Lately he’s been trying to pull me into conversation but honestly I was a little over it all. There was nothing left to say anymore…

Winter:
“She’s already had her bottle so she won’t need one for another hour…”

I close the door when he nods and focus on how I’ll be packing the glass dishes in the kitchen. I find that I’m distancing myself from Mason more but until I’m out of whatever phase this is, there’s probably little to do about that. Friendships or relationships of any kind were something that couldn’t be forced and I wasn’t going to try anymore.

--

It’s the end of the weekend and he’s bringing her back. He’s back at the door in custom. I open it quickly and gather her from his arms.

Winter:
“Why is she out of the car seat?”

She’s small and adorable still. I’m grateful the baby scent has yet to leave her.

Harry:
“I don’t think she likes it much. It's uncomfortable or something, I’ll stop by the shops and get her another one today.”

Winter:
“Okay...”

Whatever. Apparently he knew something I didn't but no need in questioning it. I grab the bag and tell her how happy I am to see her.

Harry:
“Winter I-“

Winter:
“You’ll be picking her up from my mom’s from now on. She’ll be ready with her at the same times.”

He seems to take a moment for that to sink in and I use that time to pull back and shove the door shut. I kiss her a few times and cuddle her close. That face seems to brighten my day no matter how much someone had dampened it. I had found the perfect house for she and I and was excited to just have another fresh start. I’d take mom and the girls to see it this weekend. Everything was falling into place now.

The doorbell sounds again and my eyes roll with annoyance. I prop her on my shoulder and her head somehow finds my neck to rest. The curly hair brushes my chin and she smells of nothing but Harry. I’m mellowed into it just briefly before pulling open the door. My hand goes to rub her back while I just stand there unable to conjure what to say. He looks back patiently for me to lead being that I hadn’t seen him in a few days.



Winter:
“Come in.”

I had never given him those words when she was here because I didn’t really like the idea of any guy being around her besides Harry, even despite the things I may have said in the heat of an argument. He steps in and removes his coat slowly as if waiting for me to decline him. I hadn’t really been accepting his calls or texts lately so I could see why he’d feel such a way.

Mason:
“She’s adorable.”

I pull her close in impulse. It was the first time he had actually saw her in person which was a little surprising given the amount of times he’s been here in the past month. I don’t yet say anything but rather let my thoughts catch up to me.

Mason:
“Did I do something?”

A sweetheart as always…it makes me feel bad for taking the other side of my personal life out on him.

Winter:
“No. I’ve just been….dealing with some things.”

I lead him to the living room area so we’re able to talk the way I know he wants to. He gives me a peck to the lips before sitting down. I follow suit and lean my back onto the cushion.

Mason:
“You want to talk about it?”

If I did this would be the person I’d tell everything to. He’s looking from me to her profoundly and I wonder what trails his thoughts.

Winter:
“Just work, stuff with moving and…him.”

Immediately he seems concerned for me.

Mason:
“Is everything okay?”

Winter:
“I guess. She’s fine so I am.”

What I want is a glass of wine but I don’t even want to go there and form unfavorable habits. Self medicating was something I actively tried to shy away from. He smiles lightening the mood and for whatever reason I do as well.

Winter:
“What?”

Mason:
“It’s just crazy how she looks so much like you. I mean, I’ve seen the drawings but…I don’t know what I expected.”

I find myself letting down the metaphorical wall of conciliation. I had to learn to separate my feelings and not shut out the people who cared the most. None of this was his fault and I was wrong to ignore him that way.

Winter:
“I’d put her down but she’s pretty spoiled by now, you know.”

He’s still studying the way he does and I know it’s likely for some masterpiece later. I didn’t mind as long as I got to see. A part of me wanted to ask if he cared to hold her but I didn’t want to open that can of worms just yet. Harry had already forbid me from it, which only inclined me to want to do it more. He was always such an asshole but it was so reckless for me to be if you asked him.

Winter:
“I’m sorry for ignoring you. I tend to do that to everyone when I’m figuring things out.”

Mason:
“It’s okay. I just don’t want you to push me away when I’m…starting to care about you. I just need to know that you’re alright sometimes.”

I nod, realizing that his words were completely understandable. I didn’t have much of an issue with that but maybe I’d start disciplining myself to take those things into consideration.

Winter:
“I’m sorry.”

Because I never had a problem admitting when I was wrong…

Mason:
“You don’t have to be sorry.”

Soft snores help me realize that she’s asleep and I stand myself up gently.

Winter:
“I’m going to lay her down. I’ll be right back.”

I adjust the thermostat before heading up the stairs and to her room so she sleeps peacefully. I dim the blinds a little before sitting her down in the bassinette and bundling her in the pink blankets Harry had bought. I place the monitor in there with her and take the other to go with me. I watch her for awhile to see if she wakes and realizes we’re no longer connected. I leave the room when she doesn’t and make my way back to where he’s still seated in the living room. He pats the area closest to him as I approach and I grab the comforter I always use while laying across the chair. It’s sprung over me and I sit near him, pulling my legs into the couch. His arms hug around me and I embrace it.

Mason:
“You always smell nice…it’s calming.”

I was such a child when it came to compliments but I quietly thanked him nevertheless.

Mason:
“I’ve been wanting to take you on a date. Is that too much?”

I think about it a lot before answering.

Winter:
“No, it’s fine.”

Mason:
“Someplace artsy…”

Winter:
“Now I’m excited.”

--
PAST

He enters and I turn to his green eyes and curly hair. I fold my arms over my chest and initially wait for him to start. I become impatient when he doesn’t.

Winter:
“You could have told me you were staying out with your friends. I wouldn’t have worried.”

They had planned to take him out and assume get him in loads of trouble before the day we’d get married. Well we had a little while before then but I would never deny him time with his friends. I loved them all as well so I wouldn’t fuss too much about it.
He walks over to me and I fall into his arms, embarrassed at how much I’ve missed him with just a night. I thought I was upset but really there was no need as long as there was never a reason to be.

Harry:
“I apologize for not coming home-Babe, I was drinking with the guys and—“

Winter:
“Oh, it’s alright. I’m over it. Just tell me when you plan on it next time, alright?”

Harry:
“…I love you.”

He seems to have missed me more by the hold he has on me. I place my weight on my tippy toes to give him a kiss and he takes it passionately. Our fingers are locked to each other and it’s only after I pull away that I realize something may be wrong.

Winter:
“I love you too, Harry. Are you alright?”

He pauses for a long measure of time and it makes me a tad bit nervous.

Harry:
“You know that I’d never..-intentionally hurt you, right?”

I touch his face to lift his eyes from the floor.

Winter:
“Tell me, what’s wrong?”

--
PRESENT

I'd given it alot of thought by now and I wasn't opposed to being with him intimately anymore. Hell, I wasn't opposed to anything anymore if it meant capturing a clear frame of mind. I was an adult and whatever kept me happy for the time being, as long as it wasn't reckless, was what I'd find.

We're in from the date and he closes the door with a click behind him. I'm standing there dressed a little more out of my skin tonight. We'd just come back from a great night and I was sure this was the most skin he'd seen on me since us meeting.

Mason:
"You okay?"

He says from behind me as I turn to look over his place.

Winter:
"I'm with you right?"

He moves to hold my waist from behind and I focus on how to receive that. His face is in the croak of my neck and we walk forward pressed to one another. The position stirs heat in me because we'd never been this close. It helps that I've had a few sips to drink. I turn toward him, wrapping my arms around his neck as our faces touch.

The artwork around us sets the mood for me. I step out of my shoes before I'm lifted and held up by him against a nearby wall. What the hell was I doing? I didn't really know but it was drowning the stress I’d been under. He rests between my legs now and it becomes hotter somehow. A phone rings aloud in the room but we continue despite it.

Mason:
"It's yours."

Winter:
"Ignore it."

My dress is hiked up when it stops but the sound continues again directly following.

Mason:
"Could be important."

He lowers me and I immediately begin searching my bag for it. I sigh with the bad timing but answer it anyways.

Winter:
"Hello?"

Harry:
"...Hey Winter."

The very last person I cared to talk to right now.

Winter:
"Yea, what's wrong?"

I say wishing I hadn't answered. He continues to peck my neck when he realizes who it is.

Harry:
"Do you have a minute?"


Winter:
"Not now. Is everything okay with Riley?"

It was the only reason I'd answer in the first place. Though I'd refrained from moaning or anything I was beginning to notice that he'd been making his affection quite audible to Harry. I get uncomfortable when I realize there was literally no way he didn't hear the kissing. I'm almost sure of it when he takes a moment to pause over the line before continuing.

Harry:
"...It's actually about her. Can you meet me at the house in five?"

So he knew I wasn't home? I feel a little panic when he's not specifc.

I pull away to focus.

Winter:
"Wait-what's wrong? What happened?"

Harry:
"We'll talk there. Just be there okay"

I grab my coat and shoes and head back toward the door.

Winter:
"It's a ten minute drive but I'm heading for the door now."

She's something I took very seriously and there would never be any getting past that. I hang up the call and turn around quickly.

Winter:
"I'm sorry Mason. It's something with Riley, I have to go."

I step in the shoes and look up to him. I know he's not pleased but he understands.

Mason:
"Don't apologize. It's fine."

My nose is brushed to his and it feels odd given its something I once shared with someone else.

Winter:
"Mason, do you mind if I-"

He reaches into his pocket for his keys and places them in my hand.

Mason:
"Just tell me how everything goes alright?"

I give him a nod before fixing my dress and disappearing.

--

I enter the house and shut the door behind me. He's not initially in sight but his car's here.

Winter:
"Harry!"

I call impatiently.

I look over the kitchen, living room, and downstairs area and become annoyed with his absence. I kick off my heels and climb the stairs, heading straight for the bedroom once I reach my floor.

Winter:
"Harry?"

The doors open and he's waiting just seated there on the couch on the far side of the room.

Winter:
"Where is she? What happened?"

He stands quietly and the silence already bugs me.

Winter:
"Harry?"

I can't seem to read his emotion as he glances over me.

Harry:
"She's with your mother."

Winter:
"Why? I don't-"

Harry:
"She's fine Winter. Relax."

I feel the waves of confusion at once and I'm sure my face more than expresses that. I sigh, running my fingers through my hair when I get what's going on.

Winter:
"You're an asshole. I was so worried. I'm sure I ran like three lights."

He's walking toward me now but all I want is to ask him to leave.

Winter:
"What do you want Harry? I don't have the time for this right no-"

Harry:
"Where were you?"

Winter:
"Excuse me?"

Harry:
"You heard me."

Winter:
"I already have a dad.”

I head back for the door thinking of what the hell I'd be telling Mason when I got there.

His grip is on my wrists before I'm able to escape.

Winter:
"Let go of me Harry."

He doesn't listen but rather shuts the door, enhancing the grip.

Winter:
"I said get the hell off of me."

Harry:
"Did you finally have sex with him tonight?"

I couldn't seem to control the anger that pushed through my veins with his presence right now. I hated that he would think I somehow owed him an explanation for anything anymore.

Winter:
"No, thanks to you."

He's about as angry as I am but I can't figure for what. This was nothing now. He holds back whatever it is he wants to say next and squeezes me tighter in his hold.

Harry:
"Jesus. You know how to piss me off."


I couldn’t understand why there was always unfinished business between the two of us. Why we couldn’t just move and begin on the path of accepting each other’s lives apart. His tongues in my mouth before I’m able to blink and I feel myself shiver. The experience tells me I've missed him but what I want most is to push him away from me. I find myself forcefully doing just that against his chest. It only works for a second.

Winter:
"Harry stop."

For the second time tonight there's lips pulsing all over my neck. But my body reacts differently this time and I'm starting to feel like this isn't real. My skin burns all over and there's pressure building in my stomach from our pelvis areas touching. I hate myself for allowing that type of reception. I'm still resistant because I know what this will bring if I don't get away. God, I never ached for something more in my life but there was no way this was happening right now.

Winter:
"Harry,"

His hands feel around my bum and bare legs hungrily. It was like there were no longer boundaries that existed upon our breakup. He’s surprisingly sure of himself and after awhile my resistance dies a little. Then I’m confused. I don’t know what’s right or wrong anymore or what I want for my life. All I know is how I feel…I know that I hate him so much but my body’s disagreeing with me.

Winter:
"I don't want to."

I try to speak as clearly as I can so he knows I'm unwilling.


Harry:
"You sure about that?”
He pulls back to tests me. And no, I wasn’t. I don’t speak quickly enough and he's lowering himself slowly, nipping my thighs softly. The fabric is pulled and I try at keeping my breath steady. My hands reach for his head to look up at me.

Winter:
"Don't. Harry. I said don't."

I know he hears me but he doesn’t listen. I'm tingling from the inside out as his kisses travel further and further up. My heads still buzzing from the wine and I can't get away. I wondered if I wanted to. He brushes his fingers where I'm totally soaked for him.

Harry:
"Don't want to? Someone's been lying to me."


I'm trying to talk but all it does is come out incorrectly.

Harry:
"You thought I was going to just let him take you? You should have known I wouldn’t play fair."

He's pulling at my underwear and I hate myself for not feeling conflicted. For feeling like this was where I belonged even when he'd hurt me badly. His tongue begins touching over me without brace and my only emotion is defeat. I allow the moans to leave my body because keeping them in only seemed to make things worst. He's holding both sides of my hips so I don't go anywhere but I'm drawn to the feeling a little too much to move. My knees want to fail me but he holds me securely in his grasp.

Winter:
"God, Harry. You never listen.”

He continues at a spot I wasn't sure I had before and from the lack of sex in my life I feel myself down spiraling quickly. He stops me and gets up, pulling me forcefully onto the bed. I can sense the anger still present. I'm on my back and pulled to the foot of the bed with my feet against his chest.

He's handling his zipper and closing the space between us. And with his mood he doesn't bother will finding precautions.

Harry:
"So you dressed this hot for him tonight?"

His words are harsh. Immediately we're moving at a pace that we'd never really experienced with. I'm squeezing vulnerably against the bedding and my head falls back in scary pleasure. My body’s enjoying how great he feels. I try not swearing but it slips from time to time. He holds my legs together while he constantly slams into my hips. I feel him in full force there and everywhere else. Holding so much anger for a person you loved this way was painful. I bite at my lip when I feel myself ending quickly. It's in sync with him and I grow numb to our recent past for a moment. He continues through our highs until we've had enough of each other.

Harry:
"Mine."

He spreads my legs and rests between them to give me a mind consuming kiss until I'm too tired to keep awake. I nod and I fumble into sleep.

--

Harry:
"What the hell were you thinking?"

Winter:
"That you were with other people so why shouldn't I-."

Harry:
"It was once, and that's the time you know about. So don't."

I fall silent just not wanting to argue with him again.

Harry:
"Well?"

Winter:
"...Look. This wasn't even supposed to happen okay. I don’t know what’s with me and the cheating thing.”

Harry:
"If anything he's the one you were cheating with. Now I let you get that out of you system so they'll be no talking to him again."

Winter:
"...I know."

He mellows out for a second after drilling me.

Harry:
"I love you. I miss saying that…"

I just knew that trust was something we needed to find again for each other because I wasn't lately. Maybe now that he was here I would be but only time would teach me that. I'd gotten up, a little chilled in my bra and underwear to stand just in front of him.

Winter:
"I love you too."

Harry:
“Good. You’re not being stubborn.”

He touches my face as if he'd half expected me to say nothing at all.

Harry:
"...if I didn't call you to come here…would you have with him?"

Winter:
"I don't know..."

Harry:
"That would have been you're first time with someone other than me since us meeting....and Riley.."

Winter:
"I know."

I look away because he can't say the same. My feelings are hurt by it and I know that he can tell.

Harry:
"I don't remember any of it."

I nod as he holds the nape of my neck in his hand, trying my best to let it go and fully forgive him. I didn't know how people did this.

Harry:
"I was honestly convinced I'd waken up next to you that morning...Winter, I don't remember. I swear babe, please believe me."

Our noses are touching and my body made me feel things that told me I was in love. Of course I believed him because nothing about his eyes told me not to.

Winter:
"I do."

Harry:
"Do you...not want to marry me anymore?"

I see myself in the mirror just behind him where the marks have appeared in full form all over my skin. Somehow I find a smile.

Winter:
"I will..just give me some time."

A lot of time had gone by already but me seeing him with her again had made things fresh. Silently I can’t seem to stress how much he needs me based on his appearance. It just seemed he’d stopped living a long time ago and that was something I needed to fix. Awhile of me studying him and I've found another bone to pick.

Winter:
"It really hurt my feelings that you didn't tell me about the accident."

Harry:
"It was nothing , I'm fine."

Winter:
"I don't care. You're her father and I should know. What if it were me?"

I would have never heard the end of it.

Winter:
"And it didn't help to see...her."

I stretch the last part to broadcast my disgust.

Harry:
"You showed up at the wrong time and it looked a lot worse than it was. She actually wanted to know how things were going but I don't know. I realized she just-hates you or something. And loves to show it. I hate that she did that. I'm sorry. I tried calling you back over."


Winter:
"No need. I don't even want to talk about."

I fall back down to stare at the ceiling and he lays beside me to do the same.

Harry:
"Is that his car in the driveway? "

Winter:
"-yea. I drove it back when you called."

Harry:
"There's no way a guy let's a girl borrow his car unless he's banging her."

Winter:
"I've never..."

I dwindle my thumbs as I adjust to holding conversation with him again. We spoke so open and honestly about what we'd been up to since the big argument. I felt kind of in awe.

Harry:
"What was that over the phone?"

Winter:
"He took me on a date, we went...to his place after."

I'm reluctant to go on until he grabs my hand to tell me he isn't pissed anymore.

Harry:
"Go on..."

He's patient but it doesn't assure me.

Winter:
"Nothing. There was just-kissing and...touching.”

Harry:
"How much?"

Winter:
"Nothing too serious... because you called"

He rubs his thumb on the upside of my hand as we talk. And I'm embarrassed at how much I've missed him.

Harry:
"I need you to end that today. "

I knew that but it broke my heart to hear…to not have any ties with him anymore whatsoever was going to sting. He was a great friend more than anything.

Winter:
"I need to meet with him."

Harry:
"No."

Winter:
"I can't be rude to him. He kept me sane here… without you..."

He's quiet like he hates that I'm defending him. But outside of Harry he'd grown to be one of my best friends. And I knew this would hurt.

Harry:

Notes

Three more chapters. Thank you all for reading and liking this story. It is A LOT of chapters but I do it for you. You're great thanks.

If any of you have ideas of specific people you imagine the characters as, you can just leave me a message or something and I'll post the pictures.