Little Bird

The next day I lay in bed for as long as I possibly could, until finally hunger forced me from the warmth and security the duvet provided. I trudged down the stairs, unable to decipher my feelings and mood until I reached the kitchen where Harry sat. There was an empty bowl and a spoon on the table with the box of cereal next to it. He didn’t even look up as I entered. “Eat your breakfast then go get ready. We’re going out.”
I really didn’t want to talk to him, my annoyance growing at his orders, but I was curious. “Where?” I asked, making sure my tone signalled that I was angry with him.
He still wouldn’t look at me. “Louis’,”
I wanted to refuse, merely because I wanted to disobey him and argue; anger still present within me; but I did actually want to go to Louis’ house. I probably shouldn’t have, considering he knew about Harry kidnapping me and he wasn’t going to do anything to help me escape, but I liked Louis, I would freely admit that. He seemed like the person I couldn’t hate even if I wanted to.
Refusing to respond, reluctantly I complied with Harry’s demands, knowing full well I’d make up for it later on.

~*~

Harry turned off the engine when we arrived in the driveway of the unfamiliar house. The whole car ride was silent, the tension in the air thick and heavy, the both of us too stubborn to say a single word. Harry was the first to speak.
“You’ll be meeting Niall and Liam, Zayn will be there too. I want you on your best behaviour, Birdy.” He said strictly, features stern and hard; eyes roaming across my face as he sought out any signs of me misbehaving. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes, or mimic him and his low, husky and annoyingly condescending voice.
“I mean it, Birdy.” He added in a growl. “I could have kept you locked up but I’ve taken you with me, so for your sake be a good girl.”
I responded only with glare, my eyes burning with anger as I shot daggers at him. I half expected lasers to shoot from them.
Harry must have realised that he wouldn’t be getting anything more out of me, because with a clench of his jaw, he got out of the car. My door had been locked and so I sat, feeling the annoyance growing within me as Harry had to open my door, and he unbuckled my seatbelt for me, seizing my upper arm as he dragged me out and up the path to the door.
He knocked twice, and I found myself trying to fight off his iron grip, releasing annoyed and angry sighs as I failed miserably; and his grip only commenced to tighten with unnecessary force.
“Would you let go off me?” I questioned bitterly, using my other hand in attempt to prize apart his fingers that were wrapped tightly around me. “I don’t need you dragging me everywhere. I’m not your dog,” I realised only when I looked towards the door again that it had been opened and Louis was stood before us. He and Harry exchanged greetings.
“Birdy!” Louis exclaimed, obviously opting to ignore what he had previously witnessed.
I smiled shyly at him, “Hi, Louis.”
Harry clearly didn’t like that my anger was directed only at him, definitely not Louis, because he gave my arm a harsh tug and had me unwillingly stumbling behind him, until I regained my balance and slowly trailed. We entered the closest room, greetings to my curly haired captor filling the room, and I was suddenly aware of the other three boys, one of which I recognised to be Zayn; all their eyes fixated on me. My anger momentarily faltered, cheeks tinting a light pink at everyone’s attention glued to me.
Silence surrounded us, as the two unfamiliar boys seemed to be inspecting not only me, but also the intense grip on my arm that attached Harry and I together.
“Birdy, this is Niall and this is Liam – I believe you haven’t met.” Louis said happily, pointing first towards a boy who had blond hair, the roots brown and blond tufts at the top messily styled so that they stuck out in different directions. His skin was quite pale, eyes bright blue and his smile somewhat shy and sheepish. I then looked to the other unfamiliar boy; his brown hair shaved into a buzz cut, eyes brown and lips set in a straight, firm line. He simply nodded at me.
“Hi,” I murmured shyly, looking over at Zayn as I was dragged to the couch and forced to sit when Harry did; he acknowledged me with a small grin, which I tried my best to reciprocate. Though it was fairly difficult to even paint the smallest of smiles across my lips when I was still incredibly angry due to the boy beside me, who only moments ago had finally released my arm, leaving me tenderly rubbing the upper part.
Harry turned towards me with a glare at my small action, eyes narrowing while I mirrored his expression.
“What?” I snapped annoyed, “I should be the one glaring at you.”
The room fell silent as Harry and I continued out battle with our eyes, and it was pretty evident to the other boys that were was some heavy tension between the both of us. It felt like minutes had passed until eventually Louis cleared his throat, “Right then, who fancies a game of FIFA?”
~*~
Harry and I didn’t speak a single word to one another. He spoke to his friends plenty of times, and I spoke only when I politely declined the invitation to play, one because I had no idea how to play FIFA, and also because I was too busy being annoyed and angry.
It was just Harry and Louis playing, Liam watching and Niall and Zayn elsewhere, most likely around the house. It was a long shot, but eventually I mustered the courage to stand from the position I’d been in for at least an agonising hour. I began walking out of the room, Harry’s attention on the TV, but he wasn’t so oblivious he missed my attempt to escape.
“Oi,” I had my back to him, not bothering to turn around. “Where do you think you’re going?”
I clenched my fists; at that point where everything he did or said irritated me greatly. “Anywhere that’s not near you.” I mumbled without thinking, eyes widening as I realised I had voiced my immediate bitter thought purely on impulse. I continued on, ensuring I at least looked unfazed by what I had said and my current actions.
I presumed Harry began getting up to hurt my arm some more, because Louis’ voice piped up. “Just leave her for a minute, mate. Zayn’s in the hall so she can’t go anywhere anyway.”
Zayn was in the hallway, and he looked up from his phone as he realised my presence. Cocking an eyebrow slightly, he most likely wandered what I was doing. “You okay?” He asked.
I nodded my head. “Urm – yeah, is there anywhere I can just… sit, where Harry’s not?” I asked awkwardly and quietly, smiling sheepishly as I hoped he would understand my current predicament, and that I needed to be without Harry’s forced company right now. It was nice seeing Louis; but I really, really wished I had fought Harry and refused to go with him earlier. I could have been happily enjoying Harry-free zone, eating crisps and reading or playing with Noodles. I could have been trying to calm the anger eating away at me with time alone – I really needed time alone.
Thankfully Zayn responded with a smile. “C’mon.” I followed him silently through the hall and then the kitchen until we reached the back door. I was greeted with a gust of cool air, the breeze flowing through my brown locks and making me hug my jacket tighter to my body as the both of us stepped out. The back garden had fences surrounding it, meaning that chances of escaping were limited, not that my chances were high any way.
Zayn sat on a small wall and I took that as my cue to do so too.
“So why are both you and Harry currently wearing expressions like a smacked arse?”
“Harry is an arse.” I corrected simply on impulse – not thinking. I blushed a little, but Zayn laughed slightly, reaching into his pocket he pulled out a packet of cigarettes and a lighter, putting one between his lips and lighting it before he spoke again.
“Well obviously,” he smirked, “Harry’s an arse by nature – what I mean is what’s he done to boot him up to first class arse as opposed to regular, middle-class arse?” I smiled, laughing slightly, surprised at Zayn’s nonchalant way of insulting Harry, even if it was half-heartedly and not in the sense of being bitter and mean.
I figured that whatever was said would stay between the both of us, or at least just not reaching Harry, and if it did I didn’t care. Shrugging my shoulders slightly, I sighed, “It’s just him in general. One minute he’s, he’s actually sweet and then the next he – he’s just a dick, and I don’t feel bad for saying that because it’s true. And I’m a person not a toy, I’m tired of being locked up – even if sometimes he is nice to me – I just – I – ugh,” I paused, taking a deep breath as I eyed the packet of cigs in his hand.
“Can I have one of those?” I asked, looking up at his deep brown eyes.
Zayn couldn’t mask the evident surprise etched onto his features, lips parted slightly and eyes rose.
“You smoke?” He questioned.
I couldn’t help the small laugh that left my lips at the evident shock. “I have done a… few times.” I admitted sheepishly.
“Really?”
I smiled and nodded, “Really.” I confirmed. “When you’re forced into taking extra calculus classes you need something to take the pressure off once in a while.” With an expression that said ‘fair enough’, he handed me one along with his lighter. I held a cig gently between my lips and pressed my thumb down on the lighter, inhaling the smoke with a feeling of satisfaction as the white cloud hit the back of my throat.
“Look, as far as I know, you don’t deserve to have been dragged into this; even if you’re not as innocent as I thought,” he pointed to the cig now held loosely between my fingers, a teasing smile on his lips. I laughed. “And Harry’s a mate, a close mate and he’s a good lad – but don’t put up with any of his shit, alright?”
I nodded my head with a grateful smile, and then we fell into a comforting silence, each taking the occasional long drag that brought us to somewhat relaxation.

“Is she out here – where’s Zayn? Birdy, Birdy?” I heard Harry’s voice before I saw him, and when I did I really wished I hadn’t.
His eyes locked on me, widening a drastic amount as a deep frown creased his brow upon realising what I was currently doing.
“What the hell are you doing?” He exclaimed, snatching the cigarette from my hand and stamping on it much harder than necessary. “You’re fucking smoking!” He shouted, anger colouring his cold features, dripping from his tone. He turned towards Zayn, a fury of anger and shock twisting his face – “You let her fucking smoke!”
He blatantly ignored Zayn’s casual defenses, grasping hold of my wrist and tugging my body from my seated position. His grip tightened dramatically as I began struggling against him, my eyes finding that Louis and Liam and Niall were all stood in the hallway, presumably trying to figure out what was going on.
“Would you quit dragging me?” I snapped angrily, “I’m not your bloody rag doll.”
The both of us stopped in the hallway near the front door, pointedly ignoring the three other boys that were watching the entire scene unfold before their very eyes.
“I can’t believe you, Birdy. What the fucks were you thinking?” I made one last attempt to free myself from his hold, this time my attempt not so futile because I managed to release myself and take a few steps back, increasing our distance. I felt my cheeks reddening as the anger inside of me tried desperately to break free.
“Oh, I don’t know, maybe I was thinking considering that I’d been freaking kidnapped I deserved something, anything to relive the stress and anxiety that you and your bloody irrational actions have put me under!” Uncharacteristic venom seeped into my tone as I stared bravely up at Harry, my anger equivalent to his, and my eyes burning with fury and teeth clenched in undeniable agitation.
Damn him.
“Look.” He said, tone now eerily calm, or maybe Harry wanted me to believe that. Either way it was not a comfort. “I know you’re only acting out because of what’s happened, because of your granddad an-”
Struggling beneath the urge to lose myself in a hysterical fit of uncontrollable rage in response to his words, I inhaled deeply. I hated that Harry believed what he had done was okay; I hated that he was so nonchalant about stealing me, and I hated that he genuinely thought my uncharacteristic outbursts were down to my granddad’s death and my granddad’s death alone, rather than thinking it was he to blame.
And maybe he was partly right – but I certainly didn’t want him knowing that. I wanted to be angry with him; I wanted to release the consuming emotions that were running wild inside of me; I wanted a reason to let everything out.
“Don’t.” I cut him off. “Just don’t. Stop acting like you know me and stop acting like I’m being this way because my granddad died when it’s your fault! If you hadn’t kidnapped me then none of this would have happened! I wouldn’t be here and I wouldn’t feel like – like this!” I was losing it; tears were springing at my eyes in pure frustration and anger and sadness and everything on top.
I blinked back the water in my eyes, having shed enough over the past week in all to last a lifetime – I didn’t want to cry and I didn’t want Harry or his friends to see me cry.
He turned towards them. “Do you mind?” Neither one was completely oblivious, the tension was thick and evident, had the air fully charged, palpable between Harry and me. His features were set of stone, eyes previously green had tuned impossibly darker – and anger blazed violently in the dark depths, the cold irises that spelled d-a-n-g-e-r. And I stared back, bravely holding his intense eyes that warned me to back down, but I didn’t.
I was losing all composure, as if my sanity and sense of safety was in complete and utter tatters, and it was as if we had travelled to the night when I was in hysterics with no care for consequences – only now I was much, much worse.
Anger was fuelling my actions and the venom soaked words that spewed profusely from my lips; I could almost feel the sour taste they left lingering behind. My eyes had not once strayed from Harry’s, but from the corner I could see each boy back up slightly or turn a little, but neither left, in fact Liam had joined, and it was as if all four had formed an audience; anxiously awaiting what would proceed to unfold.
Briefly I wondered why unlike last time Louis was holding back, choosing not to get involved, maybe he thought it best not to.
I snapped out of it when Harry spoke, his voice low, husky and hushed – but with an evident spark of rage I couldn’t dismiss no matter how much my fear told me to. “If you don’t fucking stop what you’re doing, stop whatever the fuck this is or whatever you’re trying to prove then I swear to fucking God, Birdy, I will not be responsible for my actions.” He hissed viciously through gritted teeth.
I must have been insane, because I couldn’t stop myself even if I wanted to.
“What are you gonna do – slap me?” I spat, “You’ve not had a problem with it before. In fact, why doesn’t everyone just slap Birdy? She’s too weak to stand up for herself so why doesn’t everyone just take his or her uncontrollable anger out on her? I mean it’s not like it hurts her face or anything!” I cried angrily.
I was breathing heavily by the time I came to the end of my outburst; not feeling even remotely better having let loose the raging bottled emotions I had been battling with, but in fact I had the most overwhelming urge to cry, even though I’d initially thought I’d be out of tears.
Trying my hardest to push back the sob desperate to break free as I blinked back the water that stung as if surfaced along the rims of my eyes, feebly I muttered, “I don’t want to do this anymore.”
I couldn’t suppress the tears that broke through my dam and spilled onto my cheeks. I hated myself for crying and I hated myself for being weak and I hated myself for winding up getting caught in this situation; I hated myself. Hastily I wiped my tears with the back of my hand, feeling completely helpless. I didn’t want this – I didn’t want any of it. I didn’t want to be caged in like a Little Bird, locked up and imprisoned for the rest of my life; freedom foreign to me, a figure of my wildest dream, something that was unattainable – something I would never have the simple pleasure of experiencing.
With wet eyelashes, timidly I peeked up at Harry, only now realising that my gaze had strayed. Using a somewhat stronger and firmer tone I gulped the lump rising in my throat.
“I’m done being caged up.”

Notes

i know i was supposed to post this yesterday but i has in Toronto for my 5sos concert and we literally got to the hotel took a nap, went to mcdonalds and then went to the venue. and then when we got back to the home we just ordered pizza and went to bed.

hope this is better than the last chapter because the last chapter was poop
so what does everyone think of zayn's character? I thought he was pretty cool :3 and does everyone like Birdy when she fights back a bit?
oh and incase you're wondering this is what Birdy looks like, her name is Emily Rudd
if you have any questions about this chapter my twitter is here