Grammar- Make sure you indent when another person begins to speak. Also, I noticed some places where there needed to be periods you'd by mistake put a comma. The grammar wasn't too bad, but still there was mistakes. Just make sure to reread chapters before you post them. Also, there was a few spelling mistakes.

Plot line- First off, I think it'd be nice if the chapters were longer. I felt like the story was way too rushed. I was madly confused on the first chapter. I think it was way too quick having Iris get kidnapped in the first chapter. Definitely slow things down a bit. It'd of been nice if the story had more detail. I just felt like the story was trying to be something it isn't. When I was supposed to feel sorry for Iris or any of the other victims, I didn't; I didn't connect with them at all. I also felt like Iris was way too comfortable and calm while being held captive by criminals; it was sort of not believable. I also thought it was strange having their gang names actually be their band names. Really break everything down. Why are these gangs kidnapping these girls? How did it all start? The story was missing a lot. The plot could have been planned better.

Summary- The summary is really short. It really doesn't tell me what the stories gonna be about like it should. It also wasn't very interesting.

Cover- It was fine. The only minor issue was the text is dark, sort of not eye catching, really. It's kind of hard to read. But the pictures are good. It's a decent cover photo.

Characters- 5sos was alright in the story... The main character, I hardly knew anything about her. I knew way more about 5sos than her. Make sure you really build character.

What should be changed or fixed- I love thrillers! And the idea you have isn't bad at all. If I was you, I'd really go back and sort something's out with the whole plot. Slow the pace of the story down; it's going way too fast; build suspense. Build character. I know, sometimes thrillers can be difficult to write. With them, there's certain things you have to touch on. Make me disturbed or scared when I read each chapter, like thrillers are supposed to do.

Overall rating- I'm sorry, but I wasn't a fan of this story. I can tell you have a taste for writing, and it's there, but this story just wasn't working out for me. There's things that need fixed and tweaked. The story could be executed better. In my opinion, personally, I'd have to give it a 4.5.

Notes

If you'd like a review for your story, please comment below. If you didn't like the review that was gave for your story, please message me or comment below and I'll remove the review right away.~One Direction 1O1.

Have a lovely weekend, y'all! :)