"Are you crying? Oh fuck-Beth I've never...you've never cried before."

How I wish that were true. Because crying right now, is embarrassing and Louis' 'amazed' expression is making me feel self conscious beyond belief. He's making me feel like I have three heads.

"Shut up." I sniffle sipping under my eyes, hoping that somehow Louis will forget all about this.
Although it's not very likely.

"Why are you crying? Did I say something?" Louis ponders, as he begins to rub my arms.

"I don't even know why I'm crying." I rub my eyes. This makes no sense. "I just know that it's your fault."

"Sweetheart all I said was that you were my best friend?" Louis wrinkles his nose, and cups the back of my head.

"No one has ever said that to me before." I say quietly. I let Louis push my head to his chest as he begins to rub my back. It's nice, and...it's just so fucking nice.

"It's true. I'm glad I'm your first best friend. That way you're stuck with me forever."

"You're not that amazing." I joke. Although being friends with Louis forever doesn't sound too bad. It sounds perfect actually.

"Don't be a twatt."

"You make it easy." I squeeze his middle. This is wonderful, and I never thought it would happen to me. But it did. And I'm beyond grateful.

"Beth...Beth..?"

That was a nice daydream/memory. I still haven't decided what it was, but it was nice. I look up and grin at Louis, who's starring at my curiously. I would be too, I think I've zoned out for five minuets. Poor Ben not noticing.

"Are you okay? Feeling dizzy?" He whispers. I shake my head and squeeze his hand. Ben smiles and points back down to the documents. And yes. These documents are insane and they seem almost unreal.

"So you sign here...and then initial here." Ben is a kind man. Tall, well built and incredibly patient.

"And that's it? Lilly won't be able to fight me or sue me...?"

Ben chuckles and shakes his head.

"Nope. Once you sign your name, everything your father put under your name will be yours. Lilly won't stand a chance if she decides to challenge the will." Ben shuffles in his seat until he's comfortable. I look over at Louis who nods at me with an encouraging smile.

Louis knows me too well.

"Why did my father remove her from his will?" Ben sighs and looks down. "I've been trying to understand this. Trying to make sense out of it. But it's not adding up. I imagine you know our history...?"

"I'm aware of most of it, yes...but I personally don't know all of it," he looks up for a minuet and then over at Louis. "Your father's last weeks were a bit...strange were your sister is involved."

"Strange?" I ask and Ben nods. "What do you mean strange? Did something happen?"

He stays quiet for a few seconds and then fusses around his portfolio until he pulls out these fancy looking documents. "I'm sure you're aware of your grandfather leaving you a very large sum of money when he passed."

I look over at Louis with bugged eyes. Louis furrows his brows like he can't believe I don't know. And it makes me want to smack him until he remembers that I don't remember half of my life. I do remember my grandfather dying though. I wasn't allowed to attend the funeral (something about being a disgrace) I was only sixteen. But Lilly came home bouncing and rambling about how 'Grandad had left her his fortune' and something about a ranch or land. I didn't really pay attention. I was busy with the actual death of the poor man, that his money was the least of my concern.

"Grandad didn't leave me anything-not that I cared-but my father and Lilly both said that everything was for Lilly," Ben shakes his head and let's out a breath. "Look if you somehow think I'm going to fight Lilly for what's hers you're wrong. I don't care about the mon-"

"Bethany, Lilly has been stealing from you for years." He says. Effectively making me shut my mouth.

"Stealing? Stealing what? I have nothing," it's true. I have nothing. And even if I had a penny I'd probably let her have, in exchange for her to leave me alone. "Louis tell Ben I have nothing, and that it's not okay to lie to a pregnant women."

"Sweetheart maybe he's not lying?.." Louis says slowly, his head falling on my shoulder. "Unless you are. Then fuck you."

Ben rakes his fingers through his black hair and pushes a paper in front of me. He uses his finger to point to the bottom and I think I may have a heart attack. I grab the paper and re-read it, thinking that the words will magically change.

Except they don't.

All the, residue, and whole of my estate, both real and personal, of whatsoever kind or character, and wheresoever situated, I give, devise, and bequeath to my beloved granddaughter: Bethany Ann Mills to be hers absolutely and forever.

"This isn't funny," I let the paper drop and rub my face. I know Harry says his knit hat was lucky, but this is just ridiculous. "I'm going to hit you if you don't stop."

"Beth," Louis warns grabbing my arm. "Shut up and listen to the poor man. And if he's lying then I'll let you hit him."

Fair enough.

"Your grandfather's last wishes were for you to inherit everything. He had left you a letter explaining it all, but somehow and I do blame your father-may he rest in peace-Lilly found it and destroyed it. It took over a year to find the actual will," he claps his hand on the table and looks over at Louis. "Since we didn't have this," he points down to the paper that has some how become so valuable and a form of proof that Lilly is absolutely the worst human being to walk the earth. "Everything went to the first born grandchild. A.k.a Lilly."

"So everything is hers?" She can have it. I don't need money. At this moment I just really need some form of peace. No matter how small.

"Everything is yours legally...well what's left of it," Ben scratches at his jaw and pulls out another document. And if he keeps pulling out shit like this I really will have a heart attack. "Lilly has spent the majority of it...."

"I don't even care," I sigh. Louis begins to rub circles on my back. "She can have it. As long as she stays out of my life I don't give a single fuck."

"I understand but-"

"No. No buts."

"I'm sorry Bethany, but your father's orders-"

"My father's not here," Ben really should listen to me. I'm hormonal and this is all putting me on edge. "She can keep what ever she has already spent."

Ben shakes his head (and I've noticed that every time he does that, it's not because it's something good) "Your father demands, Lilly pay everything back. Every. Single. Cent." He punctuates after every word. It just makes me want to kick him.

"I. Don't. Care."

"I'm sorry Bethany. That's not up to you." And this man doesn't sound sorry at all. It's sad because nothing is ever up to me. Nothing. "Once the last cent has been payed back, then you can shun Lilly from your life."

Of course I somehow still loose. "Fine. I give up," I sigh. I'm too tired to fight this man. "But you're taking care of it all. I don't want Lilly anywhere near me."

"Okay, okay."

I lean back against Louis' chest, as he pats my little person. "Good friggin answer mate." Louis says, tilting his head to the side.

"So when is your baby due?" Ben says looking between Louis and I, a small grin plastered on his face. I look back at Louis amused. And when our eyes meet, we both break into a fit of giggles. "What? Why are you laughing?"

"Louis' not the father of my baby." I say laughing.

"Yeah I'm not that cool." Louis still rubbing my bump and I guess I can see why he would think Louis and I were together. But we're not. And it's hilarious.

"Oh," Ben says with flushed cheeks. "I'm sorry I thought....well you two...I'm sorry."

"No it's fine." I say, my breathing returning to normal. "My boyfriend is busy and Louis decided to keep me company. I'm sure you'll meet Harry soon enough."

"Ah Harry Styles. Yes, I think I've read about the father to be somewhere."

"Um yeah," that's not even surprising. I do forget that the boys are famous. I'm an idiot. "Are we finished?"

Ben nods and holds out a pen. "Yes. Just sign and I'll take care of everything else."

With a nervous hand I sign my name on the bottom. And I feel like I'm signing my soul away. "Everything is in this account. Here is your bank number and all you have to do is show them your I.D. I'll be in touch in a few days."

"Wait!" Ben stops before he can walk out. He turns to me confused. "You never told me why Lilly was removed from the will."

"Another time. It's a long story." I nod and smile as he walks out. The story does seem like it would be too long. And I think it'll be quite depressing.

"Well now that you're rich, will you buy me a pony?" I roll my eyes at Louis and shove his shoulder.

"Tell you what, if my doctors appointment goes well tomorrow I'll buy you a whole fucking barn."

"Ahh it's lovely having a rich best friend."

"Says the multi millionaire." Louis laughs and pulls me into his arms.

Hugs are nice.

****
18 weeks.

Head to rump, your baby is about 5 1/2 inches long, and they weigh almost 7 ounces (about the size of a bell pepper). Their busy flexing its arms and legs — movements that you'll start noticing more and more in the weeks ahead. Their blood vessels are visible through their thin skin, and the ears are now in their final position, although they're still standing out from the head a bit.

"Are you the baby's father?"

This is the fourth time we have been asked this. Although I don't blame them. Louis and I are very touchy, I suppose.

"No he's the baby's godfather." I say and the doctor nods and scribbles down words on his note pad. Louis beams down at me, and grips my hand.

"Really?" He asks excitedly.

I nod. "Yes really. Harry and I both agree you're the perfect choice-actually this is just my way of saying you're my favorite." I wink and wait for the doctor to start up the machine.

"I always knew I was." Louis says, his tone smug. A layer of happiness underneath. "Thank you." He says softly.

I hum in response and relax my head back.

This is sad. And it makes me miss Harry. I miss Harry a lot, and I know he'd love to be here. Harry's the father and I feel a shit ton of guilt because he's not here.

"Okay here we go." the doctor rubs some jelly-like substance on my stomach causing me to jump. A warning that it would be cold would have been nice. A whooshing sound was heard, and I was stuck in a daze. My little person looked unbelievable. They were floating around and...fuck it actually looks like a baby.

It's incredible. A hundred times one incredible.

"Would you like to know the sex?"

I looked over at Louis who is looking at the screen amazed. He was squeezing my hand when he looked down. "You're the Mum Beth."

Yes but he father isn't here.

But then again I'm an impatient idiot. And maybe it's okay for me to be a bit selfish.

"Yeah, okay."

The doctor hums and moves the wand around. He makes a small 'ahh' sound and then looks up at me with a bright smile. "Okay."

****

"I'll be in my room. Come find me when you're done." Louis says, dropping a kiss on my head. I nod and shove him away. He chuckles and walks out, the door shutting softly behind him.

It's been a week and Harry calls every night at this time (the phone being a gift from Harry so that he had a way to communicate with me. The only people who had the number were the guys, Paul, Ben , and Eleanor) I never answer because I meant it when I said I needed time. He texts every morning and through out the day. But I know that if I text back it's just going to make me miss him.

And I already do.

A lot. Like a lot-lot.

Two minuets until he calls. And I'm slightly panicked that he won't call.

When I first imagined myself as a mother (actually I've never imagined myself as a mother) I always thought I'd be married and older and my husband would be here next to me as we talked about the future and I'd be older. Much, much, much older.

I love Harry, and I don't want my baby to ever think I don't, because then that would be a lie. And lying is bad.

First lesson as a mom. Lying is ba-

My phone rings and it causes me to jump in my spot. Damn little device. I look down and relax slightly when Harry's familiar number pops up on the screen. I let it ring three more times before I slide my finger across the screen.

"Hello?" I say softly.

Harry breathes out audibly, "Beth, oh my god. I love you, hi." There's shuffling in the back ground until it stops. "How was your appointment? Are you okay? Is the baby okay?"

"How did you know?" I ask.

"You told me before you left." He says easily. I remember, but since we had Paul take care of everything I had expected Harry to forget. "Baby? Are yo-"

"I'm goo-we're okay," I say before he can flip out. "Everything went okay. Everything is as it should be."

I can hear Harry sigh out relieved. "Okay," there's a beat of silence until Harry breaks it. "I miss you....and I know it's only been a week..but I miss you. I miss you so fucking much." Harry rushes out and I wish he was here so I could hug him.

"Har-"

"I know," he mumbles. "What did the doctor say?" And I'm extremely thankful he switched the subject. Gives my heart a chance to survive.

"Are you one of those new parents that want to be surprised?" I ask hoping the answer would be no. Because I'm excited and I know Harry will be excited and....everyone should be excited.

"Um. No, not particularly. No wh....wait do you know?"

"Not if it'll upset you." I murmur.

"Being away from you upsets me." He mumbles.

"Harry." I warn.

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry," he takes a breath. "I'm ready."

"Are you sure?" I ask. Harry laughs through the phone. "There's no rush."

"Bethany Ann Summ-"

"It's a boy Harry. We're having a boy." I whisper. Harry doesn't say anything and I count to fourteen when there's a sudden scream. "Harry?! Did someone die?! Harry?!"

"A boy Beth! There is a tiny little man floating inside of you!" Harry's tone is disbelieving.

"Yeah," I sigh.

"I'm flying out to see you! I'll be there in a day!"

"No Har-"

"I love you! I can't wait to see you!"

The line goes dead and I'm frozen in place. With all of the excitement I don't think Harry realizes that it's only been a week and a half since I left. Nine days. Am I excited to see him...secretly yes. Should I be? No I don't think so. All I know is that I'm having a boy. And I feel....I don't know what I feel, but I feel something.

I finally feel something.

Notes

This story is my bitch.