Alter ➳ h.s

t e n
the bare necessities
ember

It didn’t take long for me to point out to Harry that he had no idea where he was going. He assured me that he’d been to California plenty of times, he just wasn’t sure where to take me. We walked, and walked… and walked. I stopped a few times to buy things from stores we’d pass by. Harry would end up paying after minutes of arguing. “Still don’t know where to take me?” He shook his head. “We’ve been walking for nearly two hours. Please think of something!”

He dug into his back pocket and placed his sunglasses on his face. “Let’s go on a road trip, yeah?” I was so confused and pissed off that he had us walking around for so long to decide on a road trip, and I’d just landed. We got back to the hotel, but Harry seemed hesitant on leaving again. “Actually, why don’t we just go tomorrow? I’m a bit tired.” He was lying to me again.

“You’re lying. What’s wrong.”

“Nothing! I told you not to worry about me. I’m fine, just tired.” His slamming the door in my face made everyone come out into the hall.

“It’s nothing,” I said. They returned to their respective areas and I did the same. I didn’t lay awake. Instead, I fell peacefully asleep. And I thought I would stay asleep, until I was woken up by my cell phone at seven o’clock. It was Ben. I was tired, but I answered anyway. Big mistake. “Hello?”

“Good morning, Ember. How was your day yesterday?” He didn’t let me answer, “I’m sure it was great. I mean, it seems like it. You smiling and all happy walking about California, the place I was supposed to take you to.”

“What’re you talking about? It’s early.”

“I’m talking about you going off to California to flirt with that Styles. You know I don’t like any of them, but you go off and stay with him? I can’t even fucking leave before you fuck someone else.”

“Excuse me? I came to California because your mother hates me, you’re never there for me anymore, and what are you doing right now? Yelling at me over the phone like I’m a child. You said you were going to bring me here, and I said fine. You were obviously a little too late. I don’t have the energy for your early morning bullshit, Ben. I’ll talk to you whenever I feel like it.” I hung up and laid back down to go to sleep. A knock on the door interrupted me again. “What?!”

“It’s me.” Harry was behind the door. I got out of bed to open it. He was shirtless with sweatpants nearly below his waist. “Listen,” he let himself in and I closed the door. “I’m sorry. I-It’s the delusions. The thoughts and stuff. It’d been too long since I’d taken my meds, and I took it out on you. I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. Have you taken them?”

“Yeah. I won’t forget, now. I’m sorry again, it’s really early.”

“No, it’s fine. I was already awake. Ben was bitching at me for being with you here. He’s always wanted to bring me here. So it’d be special, you know?”

“Shit,” he turned his back the other way and dragged his hand through his morning hair. “I’m sorry, you should’ve told me.”

“No it’s fine. I wanted to be here. Ben’s been an ass since he told me he was leaving. I didn’t care.” And I didn't. I didn't miss Ben and, despite his arguing, I didn't think he missed me either. Harry and I decided the spending a morning in would be best for the both of us.

Movies were placed together in alphabetical order. "Disney movies. Pick one."

"The Jungle Book." Harry's eyebrows scrunched together and I smiled, "Only to sing about bare necessities."

"Ah, of course." So we watched up until that point and went on to a whole series of Disney movies. It took up about eight hours of our time. They had a concert today, and we knew that people would come looking for him soon. And with it already being 4:00, we knew he'd be summoned soon. "Thank you for spending the morning with me."

"Well, technically, since this is my room, you spent it with me. But, thank you." He went to walk out and I grabbed his wrist. It was probably not the best idea, because he looked back at me with lust and wanting in his eyes. “D-Don’t forget to take your pills.”

He pretended everything was normal again and responded, “Yes, of course.” Harry placed his hands on my shoulders and in the moment, time seemed to stand still. His breath was minty still, even after staying with him for eight hours and probably more. He smelled nice, a smell I couldn’t explain. He also smelled like me, which was good. Thank God. “I’ll see you later.” A kiss landed itself on my cheek and he closed the door behind him.

➳ ➳

“—So he just kissed you like that?” Josie enthused.

“No! It was a kiss on the cheek. Nothing more. He’s a good guy.”

“I give it a week.”

“Before?”

She removed herself from the soft carpeted ground and said, “Before you decide that Ben isn’t who you really love and Harry is.”

“I just met Harry, I don’t love him. And excuse you, but I do love Ben, very much so.”

She wandered to the kitchen, her voice fading, “Says the one who came here partially because Harry asked her to…”

“Oh, shut up, Josie. What’s up with you and Liam?” I shouted until she returned to lie down on the floor next to me. I was in the process of solving a Rubik’s cube. It reminded me of Harry, which convinced me that maybe I liked Harry, but not loved him. The bible says that you should never look at another person with lust or want who isn’t your partner, I guess I broke that, too. I don’t love Harry, I don’t lust him, either. I simply like him. He’s a character, a character that I like.

“Oh, nothing. He’s sweet. Still upset, though. He’s actually kind of open about, like, everything. It’s nice.” She cleared her throat and put on a serious face, “My longing for him is no longer a mere obsession, for it has turned into a meaningful crush that I hope to continue.”

I laughed at her. The concert was over by now, the time being 9:04. They were busy, though, so I understood. Ben called again, “What is it, Ben? I’m busy.”

“Are you still in California?” I didn’t get a greeting, but I told him that I was. “I’m coming there. For one, I don’t trust you out with that Styles kid. Two, I miss you, and I’m sorry.”

“You haven’t even been in New York long enough.”

“I know, but you can’t be staying there long. I’ll stay for a few days, then we can leave together.”

“Who says I want to leave in a few days?”

“Well, we’re going together, no matter what.” I took that harshly. “What’s your room number and hotel?” I told him and he hung up after reciting that he loved me.

It took all but ten minutes for Josie and I to hear silent arguing outside the door. “I swear, if that’s who I think it is, I’ll die.”

“You better pack your bags. Ben’s gonna pull you out of here, if he needs to.”

“Jesus,” I commented. Harry and Ben straightened out. I’d felt awkward moments, plenty of them. But it wasn’t ever as awkward as watching your distant boyfriend that you wanted to break up with and your friend that you have a ‘high school’ crush on stand next to each other without saying a word.

“Ember Rose,” Harry remembered my middle name, I’d told him once when Ben called saying he’d left for New York. “I would like to take you to dinner tonight. If that’s okay with your boyfriend.”

“You’ve forgotten that she’s mine. She’s my girlfriend.”

“And you’ve forgotten that she isn’t your’s. She’s too precious to be treated as an object.” Josie whistled in the background. “Would you like to join me, Ember?”

“Actually, Harry,” I decided. “Maybe in a few hours. I need to talk with Ben.” Harry’s eyes looked at me sadly and he nodded, him and Josie walking out.

“Thank God. I’m tired of him. I missed you.” I wanted to push him away, but I couldn’t. I love Ben, I really do. That’s why I allowed him to touch me the way he did, because he had before. I allowed him to kiss me, and touch me, and breathe on me. He removed my shorts and baggy shirt, that I’m sure was his anyway.

Kisses lingered up and down my neck while I hung onto his neck. Ben always had muscle everywhere, so it didn’t surprise me when he pulled me onto his torso, my legs latched on. I removed his shirt while our lips stayed pressed together and our tongues danced together. I didn’t miss his cockiness, or his rudeness, but I missed him in every way possible. Ben is beautiful. He really is. But so is Harry. Thank God Harry didn’t run through my mind while Ben proceeded to remove his clothes and search in his back pocket for a condom.

I guess it’d been a while since Ben and I had had sex, because the way he thrusted into me was, in a way, animalistic. It felt different. Ben’s usually soft and gentle, but he was being rough, and it hurt. More than a normal type rough that everyone likes, but like he was angry. That’s why my near inaudible voice whispered, “Stop.”

He grunted, but kept going, “What?”

“Stop, I can’t do this.”

“Em, what’s wrong?”

“I-I don’t know. Can you go? I love you.”

“Yeah, sure. I love you too. I’ll just get my things.” I watched Ben leave the hotel room, but allowed Harry in. I needed someone.

Notes

Well, I can see the asshole-ness runs in the family. Sorry for not updating. I have a lot going on, and this might be the last one for at least another week. Sorry, exams and finals and JUST SHOOT ME... not seriously.

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