Alter ➳ h.s

n i n e
there’s nothing to miss
ember

My dirty and ripped dress plus the mysterious black truck, ripped tights, etc. weren’t aiding my case when I attempted to prove to my parents that whatever happened last night with whomever was innocent. Dad scolded me with, “I understand you’re upset about Ben leaving but Jesus, Em. It’s wrong to cheat.”

“I didn’t cheat! There’s nothing to miss about Ben anyway. I’ll be in my room.” Last night was my breaking point. I wasn’t ready to break up with Ben, but neither was I ready to stay with him. I’d wait. That’s what I’d do. Wait. Wait for him to return from New York so I can explain to him that it isn’t working out. That’s all. In my mind, I’d already broken up with him anyway. He just didn’t know.

I took a small nap after wondering what I should do about the fact that Harry was the only person who was even close to understanding and he was taking a plane cross-country. I thought about that in the shower and then took my nap. Somehow, even after only seeing him in person a possible total of five times, I missed Harry Styles. A character he was, I realized once I woke up. I sat with my legs crossed typing away on my laptop with my phone positioned close by. Harry wasn’t understood by many, neither am I. So it didn’t surprise me when he was willing to listen, and willing to share his experience with the many mental problems he has.

Ben called a few times but I, again, didn’t answer. I couldn’t be bothered to hear him either apologize for his mom or yell at me for not answering and claiming he was so worried about me. Jase came into my room and leaned on the bathroom door. “Ben’s been calling. Called the house, Mom, Dad, even me.”

“Well, I won’t be answering.”

“Ever gonna tell me what happened?” He put up his finger before I could breathe a word, “Oh, wait. ‘No one understands.’”

“Correct. Now, get out. Love you.” He smirked and left me to continue typing. I found a love in writing. Writing and reading go hand in hand. I hadn’t visited the library in a while and it scared me a bit considering I almost never go a day without going. I missed holding an old book that was new to me in my hands and calling it mine for a few short moments. My phone began ringing after another hour. An unrecognizable number came up on the screen. I didn’t answer it before going to Google and searching the area code. The United Kingdom.

I called the number back and they answered, “Hello? I’m sorry, is this Ember?”

I smiled, “Harry?”

“Ah, perfect. Don’t think I’m creepy, I got your number from Liam who got it from Josie because they’re going to be secretly fucking soon.”

I heard Liam punch Harry in the background and I commented, “Still creepy. Where are you… in the country?”

“Georgia. It’s beautiful here, we’re going to California tomorrow.”

My imagination ran wild. I want California, I reminded myself. I should have gone. I wish we know each other better, I told myself. “California sounds nice. I’ve always wanted to go.”

“Then come.”

“Harry,” I reminded. “You could be some psychopath. In a way, you’re a sociopath. I’d rather go on my own.”

“Okay, no one said you had to come with us, first. That’d get me in trouble with the public. Let me pay for you to come. Liam will pay for Josie, he likes her, for sure.” He seemed to travel to a different room and close the door. “Honestly, I don’t care whether you want to go to California or not. I just want to see you again.”

I thought about Ben instantly. No one said I’d have to tell him everything. Even though it’s kind of written in the secret book of, “How To Be The Perfect Girlfriend”. I’m pretty sure I failed that book since I didn’t follow Rule #31: Love His Parents. “I-I. Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay. I’ll come. But, I’m paying for myself. Don’t know about Josie, but I’m paying for myself.”

“That’s fine. I’ll see you tomorrow, then?” I agreed. “Good, I’ve got to go now. Nice talking to you, Ember.”

“Bye.” I told Josie that she was going with me no matter what because I couldn’t be alone with Harry. I do but I don’t trust him. He was one that understood the most and the least, and I was scared which one would help.

➳ ➳

“Just a lot of mattresses and sexual tension,” Harry explained to me when I arrived in the room announced to be mine. They’d bought the whole floor for the next week or so and expected it to come to good use. He continued to the back of the room where he had bottles of pills sitting on the table along with two Rubik's cubes. “Join me?” I’d thought this was my room, but I ignored myself.

I sat next to him in the corner and set a timer on both of our phones, “Start.” I didn’t tell Harry that I was one of the best at solving Rubik’s cubes. I finished in thirty-two seconds, Harry in a minute and four seconds. “Should’ve told you that I’d always been good.”

“Cocky, much?”

“Not cocky, just confident.” He smiled. I felt myself joining him.

“Ben called?” The moment was ruining. I think it was his way of not going too far.

“No. I mean, yeah, but I’m not answering. Told all my family not to answer either until I was here.”

“Let’s go out,” hi suggestion scared me. “Fuck the paparazzi, let’s walk around. I miss LA.”

“Fine, whatever.” We told everyone where we were going, earning a nudge from Josie who was with Liam, as always. California was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. I didn’t even mind being hours away from Ben anymore, knowing he’d left us on a bad note. As per usual, paparazzi did show up asking questions. Such as why I was the first girl Harry had been seen with since his break-up with someone last year. “You look tired,” I shouted to him, over the screams.

“I can hear you. I’ve learned to hear the important.” He might be able to hear me, but I could barely hear him. “I have been sleeping more, but it’s still bad. It’s nothing. I’m fine, don’t worry about me.” I wasn’t, though. I didn’t worry about Harry. I had too many of my own problems to worry about. Harry is a man, a year older than I and can handle himself, he doesn’t need an extra person to worry about him. And I told him that while he pulled me along with his hand on my lower back. “Thank God you see it that way. Tired of people worrying about me, I can worry ‘bout myself.”

We continued to walk, but I finally understood why he wasn’t out as much. Besides the fact he can’t stand crowds. He was never allowed to be alone. There was almost never a moment where Harry could go out and not be followed. It was disturbing. “Hold on,” I told him. He tried to keep walking but realized I was serious. The photographers and the fans all quieted down, with the exception of the heavy breathing from crying girls. “Do you not realize that he is followed every moment of his life? For once, can you just please, fuck off? He loves you all, he really does. But you gotta back up. I get claustrophobic.”

Everyone stood there, confused. No one had ever told them to just stop. Celebrities have sworn at, beaten, and thrown around the items of photographer, but a nobody has never told them to just stop. Until now. Harry placed his hand back on my lower back and pulled me along. No one followed us. “You are a genius. I like that.”

Notes

another little chapter, how is this story? I'm obviously in love with Ember and Harry, like, ugh.

what about Ben, though? hmmmm...

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