Adison's POV

"So what's the big news?" I ask, sitting at the table while Harry cooks for me. He wanted to stay in tonight so we could talk about something. Seems important and I'm dying to know what it is.

"Who says I have news?" he asks.

"Umm...you did. Now tell me."

"You're so demanding," he says, laughing a little. "Can I finish cooking for you first?"

"I guess," I say dramatically. He laughs again and shakes his head. "By the way, I met someone that's living in the dorms at University of London this summer. She said they're actually really nice and the food is pretty good."

He nods but doesn't say anything. Harry got in a few months ago and I've been so excited about the thought of having him here. Living in London together would be so much fun, and seeing him more than once every few weekends would be so much better for us. We've gotten a little bit distant lately. Not on purpose, it's just hard doing the long distance thing. We both have separate lives now, which is what I wanted. It's good for us to be able to do our own thing and I think we're at a point where we can be together without being too together.

But the physical distance between us has created some metaphorical distance as well. I don't know if he feels the same way, but I just don't feel the need to text him all the time and call him three times a day to tell him what I'm doing. I don't need that constant communication like I used to. Part of me thinks that's healthy, but the other part wonders if that's a bad sign.

"Okay, I've never made this before but hopefully it's okay," he says, setting a pot in front of me. Harry is a wizard in the kitchen somehow, so I don't know why he's always so nervous. He sits down on the end beside me and smiles warmly.

"I'm sure it's great, Harry."

"We'll see I guess. If you're not dead by morning that's probably a good sign."

"Probably," I agree, laughing and lifting the lid. He watches me while I serve some onto his plate then mine. As soon as we've each had some food, which tastes as good as it always does, I once again ask him to tell me his news.

"I don't know if I want to tell you, it's fun to make you beg for it," he says, twirling some noodles onto his fork. I give him a 'really?' look and he just smirks at me.

"Harry come on!" I whine. I just want to know already!

"Nope."

"Come on, just tell me."

"Oh, now I'm convinced."

I do my best not to laugh at his sarcasm but it proves to be a failed attempt. He chuckles a bit and sits back in his chair, setting his fork down and taking a sip of water from his glass. I watch him the whole time, knowing that if I say anything right now he's just going to make me wait longer. I just sit patiently and continue eating while he silently drives me insane.

"Alright fine, I'll tell you," he says finally. I set my fork down and set my elbow on the table, leaning my chin on my hand and leaning towards him. He runs his fingers through his hair.

"You're nervous," I observe. "Is this big news?"

"Sort of," he says unsurely. "I kind of got offered a job."

"Okay...like for the summer?" I ask, not getting what the big deal is. So he got another job, he's had a job for a year.

"Well no, not exactly. I would be working under a chef at a restaurant and taking a few classes at that little culinary school in Cranage."

"Cranage? Wait, that's in Cheshire. Where is the restaurant?" I ask carefully. He's supposed to be moving here in the fall.

"It's at the golf club," he says quietly.

"In Holmes Chapel?" He nods and I stare at the wall opposite me. "And it's a permanent position?"

"Yeah." His fingers rake through his hair again and I sit back in my chair, absorbing this information. Working at a restaurant at home....not going to school anymore? What would that mean for us?

"Okay Ads, please say something," he says. He stands and pulls his chair beside mine, his hand placed on my thigh. "You're making me nervous."

"You'd be staying at home," I conclude quietly. He nods. "So you'd still be there and I'd still be here."

"Yeah, but we can make it work. Who knows, maybe I won't even like it and I can just come for second semester. We've done fine since Christmas, we can make the distance work."

"I don't want to have to make it work anymore, Harry. We've had to put so much work and effort into making our relationship work and I was really looking forward to having you here."

"I know," he agrees. "I know, it's just...you know how much I hate school. If I can do this and make a career out of it, maybe I could open my own restaurant someday. School just isn't my thing and this is a really good opportunity."

Harry's POV

Adie abruptly pushes her chair back and stands up, walking away from me and over to the living room. She walks away and starts to walk back, opening her mouth to speak but quickly closing it again. She turns and rakes her fingers through her hair, inhaling deeply with her other hand on her hip.

"Talk to me," I request quietly. She shakes her head and I walk over to her, stopping in front of her. "What are you thinking?"

"I'm thinking...." she shakes her head again and opens her eyes. She stares up at me and I can practically see the thoughts racing through her mind. "I'm happy for you. This is a big deal. If you want to do this then that's your choice."

"What? Just like that? I'd be staying in Holmes Chapel and you're just okay with that?" I thought for sure she would put up a fight about this. She was constantly talking about us being able to spend time together finally and now she's just okay with me not moving here? She takes a deep breath and drops her hands to her sides, looking defeated.

"What do you want me to say? This is obviously a huge opportunity for you and if you want to do it I'm not going to try and stop you," she says tiredly.

"I don't know, I guess I was kind of hoping you would tell me that you want me here, that you'd rather have me in London with you than back home."

"What?"

"Don't you want me here?" I ask. I hate how needy I am sometimes, but it's nice to feel wanted, you know? It sucks to constantly feel like I'm the one with the stronger feelings, like I need her more than she needs me.

"Of course I want you here, but what kind of person would I be if I kept you from something you want? I can see on your face that you're excited about the restaurant thing," she says. She seems hurt by my question. "Why would you even ask me that?"

"Maybe because lately you don't act like you care where I am. I didn't come here for almost a month and every time I told you I couldn't make the weekend you didn't even seem bothered."

"If it doesn't work it doesn't work, I'm not going to have a fit every time! It's hard for me Harry, and I don't want to get upset every time you can't come here. I would be an emotional wreck and I'm not doing that again."

"Well, would it kill you to show a little disappointment?" I ask harshly. "I feel like you don't want me anymore."

"How can you think that?"

"Adie, you barely talk to me anymore. I'm the one who calls you, I usually text you first. Do you know how pathetic I feel doing all that? But I can't stop, because if I didn't do it we just wouldn't talk anymore."

"Yes we would," she argues. "I just don't see the point of being in constant communication. I don't want to have important conversations over text."

"It doesn't have to be important, I just want you to show me that you still need me. Do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Need me? Do you even care if I move to London or not?" I ask, stepping back from her a bit. Her eyes grow sad but she doesn't answer. My stomach drops. She doesn't care. "Adie, I can tell you right now that you're more important to me than a job. If you want me here instead of there then I'll do it. I just need to hear you say it."

"Harry, that is exactly why I broke up with you the last time!" she says frustratedly. "This is exactly what I don't want for you. If this is something you want, you should go for it no matter what. You need to have goals, things that are important to you besides me! I love you for wanting to come here for me, but I can't ask you to."

"Why? Why can't you? Even if I end up staying it would just be nice for you to at least show me that it matters to you. We could be doing long distance for another three years or more, doesn't that bother you?" I ask, my voice raising.

"Of course it does! I love you, I want you here. It would suck to have to keep living in different cities, but I'm not going to ask you to pass up an opportunity like this just for me," she argues. I turn and pace a bit, running my fingers through my hair again. I don't even know what we're fighting about at this point, I just feel angry.

"Our lives are completely separate," I conclude, dropping my hands. She looks away from me and bites her lip. "I'm not sure how that happened, but they are. I'm not...I don't even know where I fit into yours anymore."

"What...what are you saying?" she asks shakily.

"Maybe we should just...I don't know take a break or something."

"What?" she whispers, her eyes wide. "You mean...like break up?"

"I don't know." I rub my eyes with the heels of my hands. "It just feels like we're both putting a lot into a relationship that isn't working."

I know what I need right now. I need to hear her fight for us, for me. I feel like I'm the one fighting for both of us and it's exhausting. I'm not going to do it anymore if she doesn't care what happens either way.

"Is that what you want?" she asks quietly.

"I don't know." My voice breaks and I look away from her. The tears in her eyes are heartbreaking but they aren't enough. I need her to fight for us. Breaking up is the last thing I want, but if she doesn't want me then I can't fight anymore.

"If that...if that's what you want," she says faintly. I eyes snap back to hers and I feel myself breaking. She's giving up?

"That's it?" I ask, my throat tightening. "That's all you have to say?"

"If you don't want me anymore I can't force you," she whimpers. I step up to her and take her face gently in my hands. Hers overlap mine and she closes her eyes, a few tears rolling down her cheeks.

"You're just giving up?" I ask quietly.

"I'm tired of fighting," she whispers. "I can't fight with you anymore."

"What about for me?" I ask just as quietly. She slowly opens her eyes and I search desperately for something to keep me here. I'm just as tired as her. I'm so tired of fighting, even though I love her. Maybe it just isn't worth it anymore.

"I just want you to be happy," she says, One of her hands leaves mine and she reaches up to brush her fingers through my hair. "Maybe I can't give you that anymore."

"Do you really believe that?" She shrugs. "Ads...do you still love me?"

"Of course I do. How can you ask me that?"

"Then please," I beg. "Give me a reason to stay."

A few impossibly long minutes pass as we just stare at each other. Tears continue to fall from her eyes and I don't bother wiping them away. I'm sure there are a few falling from mine as well, but I don't care. I will stand here for as long as it takes for her to just tell me what she wants.

"I want you to be happy," she repeats finally. "That's all I want."

"Wh-"

She puts her hands on either side of my face and presses her lips to mine. It's not desperate or needy like it should be. Soft, loving. A goodbye kiss.

"I love you," I whisper. She nods and I rest my hands on her back, holding her tight against me.

"I know," she says. She smiles sadly through her tears and brushes her hands through my hair again and then places them against my chest. "I love you, too. Whatever you want, Harry. That's what I want."

She kisses me once more and steps away from me, walking to her room and shutting the door. I stare at it while I ponder what just happened. She's not going to fight for me. I realize that now. We've been trying so hard for too long. Maybe it would be better...

But can I really leave her? I love her so much...how can I do that? If I walk out of here right now, it might be easier. I wouldn't have to worry about making this work. I'm so tired of being the only one fighting for something. There's two of us, we should both be fighting. I don't want to be the only one trying. But I'm just tired.

I walk up to the door and stand outside it. If I walk in there I can make this work, I'll just talk to her.

But I don't. My keys and wallet laying on the table by the door, I stuff them in my pocket and forget about the bag I have in Adie's room. I may regret this for a long time, but something is pulling me out instead of back to her.

Adison's POV

I collapse on my bed in an attempt to keep my crying silent. If Harry hears me he'll feel bad and he'll come to comfort me. I know we love each other, but we've been fighting so much more and I'm not sure if it's working for us. The joy of seeing each other after weeks apart masks it for a while, but by the time Harry leaves again we're bickering like we hate each other.

I bolt up into a sitting position when I hear the front door close. Harry's bag is still here...maybe Gemma cam back.

I slowly walk to my door, taking a slow breath before opening it.

He's gone.

Notes

so sad again :( i dont know why i do this IM SORRY. frik.



so....once again my story got away from me :P ive added another chapter again. TECHNICALLY this is just the second part of the other one so i didnt really lie....so yeah theres two more chapters after this one :P

im going to do the next one right away if i get like two or three comments!!! DOUBLE UPDATE WOOOOO