Looking Forward
Chapter 29
Harry p.o.v
"Harry"
" Harry. Harry wake up we're going to be late for school." I heard a voice say to me as they shook my body for me to wake up. I grumbled and tossed and turn for a while not wanting to wake up but the voice kept on calling. My body suddenly awoke when I finally recognized whose voice was calling my name. And it wasn't who I wished it was.
I looked up to find Miley standing in front of me in my t-shirt that was a bit too big for her.
" Hey sleepy boy. Last night was fun." She said as she sat on my lap her legs around my waist before seductively kissing my face. ( Upper Area)
Normally, I'd forget about school and fuck her again but this time I didn't want to. Well I wanted to but not with her. I wanted to wake up next to Jenna. I wanted to have her sleep next to me and lay her head on my chest as she traced her soft fingers on my tattoos.
Oh my god what I'm I talking about. I'm fucking Harry Styles for god's sakes. Why do I care so much about her. She's just another girl that I'll fuck and dumb. Only this time I have to get money from her in the process. So with that mindset in mind I grabbed Miley and did what we always did the next morning.
Have sex.
(Skip to school.)
I was hanging around with the gang outside of class just chilling before I felt someone bump in me making me drop Miley's books ( that she made me carry for her). I could feel the anger starting to boil in my blood as I was about to punch the person who'd bump into me before I got a look at who it was.
Jenna.
I watch as she quickly bend down to pick them up. As I bent down to help her I noticed something on her wrists that pained me when her sweatshirt accidently lifted up. So many questions started to run in my mind as all of the possibilities of what she might've done to herself.
Did she cut her wrist? If she did she did was it because of me? Is this the first time? Has she done this before?
I quickly pushed those thoughts away not wanting to know the answer to those questions. And especially not the second one.
" Thank you." I said to her my gaze still on those exposed wrists of hers. As soon as I spoke she quickly dropped the books again that she'd finished picking up and looked up at me with those tear stained eyes of hers before she suddenly got up and went straight to class.
( Skip to class.)
Its been 20 minutes since class started and I can't focus. While the teacher goes on about Hamlet my eyes are glued to the back of Jenna's head. I can't stand her sitting in front of me and I not being able to talk to her. And if I do it has to be cool cause I can't let the rest of the boys know that I like someone. And they can't definitely not know about the deal.
" Mr. Styles." I heard the teacher say interrupting my thoughts.
" Mmmh?" I mumbled not really wanting to be here.
" Did you hear anything I said for the past 20 minutes?" He asked already assuming a response.
" Um. no." I said honestly to him. Checking Jenna out from time to time as I spoke.
"Why am I not surprised. Anyway, were talking about Hamlet. And the question is, if you were in his place, would you have avenged his father death?" He asked me expecting me not to know the answer but to his surprise ( and mine too.),I actually knew Hamlet.
" Um no. Too much work." I said earning myself a few laughs from the class.
" Why do you say that?" He kept asking.
" Well, the guy died at the end. If I were to avenge my father I don't want to die at the end. Especially not by a guy who just put poison on his sword and cut me". I said my face dead serious. Like really, Hamlet practically drove himself crazy trying to figure out what to do then he just randomly died. And so did everyone else.
Mr. Chuhran simply nodded his head and went on about asking Jenna a question.
"Mrs. Summers. Why do you think Ophelia went crazy?" He asked her as he was walking behind her desk blocking my view from her.
"Because she got tired of people telling her what to do & how to feel." Jenna answered looking down at her desk.
"But why? How? She's been told what to do her entire life yet she never snapped. Why do you think this time she went crazy?" He asked her again this time standing in front of her desk looking down at her.
I watched as she shifted uncomfortably in her desk at the presence of Mr. Chuhran's body towering her small one. I just wanted to stand up and up and punch him in the face for being able to be that close to her for no absolute reason while I couldn't even touch her even though I really wanted to.
Wait am I jealous?
" Um. I think Ophelia went crazy because this time she was in love." Jenna finally answered after a long pause.
" In love. How so? She's always been in love with Hamlet why is this time any different?"
" Because this time she's forced to deceive him in his darkest hour for the good of others and not his own."
" Go on." He said motioning for her to keep going with his hand.
" Well, this time she has grown. She's pretending to be a good girl which she is but still knows what is going on around her & understands why she's being used. And you can say that you wouldn't go crazy if you were to use the one you love for someone else's selfish pleasure."
Even though I know we were only talking about Hamlet, I couldn't help but think about Jenna & I. Maybe I'm overanalyzing this but it was just like what I was doing to her. I was/am going to use her for Dom so her can get what he wants even though I don't want to and I love her but still I'll obey because I have no say what so ever.
Damn what is happening to me. I've never ben the time to do this not even with Miley. I'm use to fuck & dumb. Not fall in love and become a 13 year old girl who analyzes every single thing. I'm in a gang for god sake's.
"Besides. If you keep pushing someone one way or another their going to reach their limits and it's not going to be pretty." She said looking down at her desk as she push her sweater more over her wrist.
If I were to keep analyzing this I would I say that I did push Jenna to her limits unintentionally and if I'm right, then her wrist would be the prove. I keep wishing and praying that I'm wrong cause I do not want to know that she did in fact cut her wrist.
" Jenna...that is a very remarkable answer my dear. But let me ask you one more question before you start rolling your eyes" He said with a small laugh making her smile a little which only aggravated me more. I should be the one making her smile.
" Why does love has such a great impact on her breaking point?"
" Because love is the reason that most people are still alive. Love is the one reason why some people don't kill themselves or commit a crime or...self harm." She whispered the last part to herself as she put her hands underneath her desk.
After she'd answered and the teacher made his comment we went back to learning as I leaned back in my chair and analyzed more shit.
-
I look at the clock and sigh as I see that we still got 40 minutes left of class. Just as I am about to try & pay attention Jenna phones ring but she quickly picked it up before anyone noticed. I watched as she answered if after getting a look at her caller Id.( I'm assuming).
" What do you mean she unconscious?" She randomly yelled after a while making everybody's head turn in her direction.
" o-ok I'll be right there. Just text me the address." She said in a rush before taking her keys from her bag and rushing out the room. Before she could get out she got stopped by Mr. Chuhran.
"Where do you think you're going Mrs. Summers?"
"Hospital." She said in a rush.
" If you leave my class you will get a detention." He said in a more stern voice hoping to get her to stay.
" Ok. See you tomorrow after class." She said before rushing out the door soon be followed by Kelsy, Niall, Pamela...
and I.
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11/11/15