Tutor Girl

“Hello miss thing. Why are you so quiet?” Tyler asked as he sat with Lux at her house after school the next day.

Tyler offered to come over so she wouldn’t be lonely with Louis being at soccer practice. Lux jumped at the chance to hang out because she and Ty weren’t able to spend much time together as of late. Plus, she didn’t really want to be alone. But it seemed like she was alone in her mind anyway. She felt weird. It was a weird day. And it was all completely on her.

Louis was all smiles when they saw each other at school. It was Lux who shied away. She didn’t ignore him, but she also didn’t go out of her way to act differently around him because of what they did the night before. They still weren’t anything more than friends. Even though she knew that was bullshit. They confessed their love for each other. They went all the way with each other. Like, that was huge. But yet, she was constantly analyzing and second guessing everything.

“Lux?” She heard Tyler’s voice again.

“Hmm,” Lux answered, still in a daze.

“You okay?” He asked, eyeing her carefully.

“Yeah. Fine,” she said with an almost robotic tone to her voice.

“You’re acting weird,” he pointed out.

Yes, weird. She was well-aware.

“Lux…” Tyler said, eyeing her skeptically.

“What?” She asked, looking back over at him.

“You better tell me what is going on right now, or so help me…” He warned.

Lux let out a heavy sigh. She didn’t even know where to begin.

“LUX LYDIA CARVER!” Tyler snapped, looking at her incredulously.

Tyler was the only one to ever call her by her full name. Lydia was her mother’s name and she figured her father chose not to use her full name when punishing her because of her mother – not that he had a whole lot to punish her for. She had a pretty good track record as far as teenagers go.

“What? Nothing. It’s nothing,” she said, shaking her head.

“You are lying to my face right now. You and Louis – you’re dating aren’t you? Like, secretly dating?” He asked boisterously.

“No,” Lux said quietly, shaking her head.

“YOU SUCKED HIM OFF AND DIDN’T TELL ME!?” He asked even louder.

“NO! God. No,” Lux snapped, looking around to make sure her neighbors didn’t overhear his outburst.

“Prude,” Tyler chuckled.

“Ty…” Lux said quietly, feeling uneasy.

“What’s going on, Lux?” He asked, getting serious.

“I told Louis I loved him last night,” Lux said quietly.

“Uh, hold the fucking phone! Say what!?” He flipped out exactly the way she knew he would.

Lux bit her lip, eyeing him guiltily. She knew she would have to tell him what came next and she didn’t think she was prepared for it.

“Lux! You told him you love him!?” Tyler asked, his eyes wide and questioning.

“Uh-huh,” Lux mumbled as she nodded her head.

“Start from the beginning. Leave nothing out,” Tyler said, completely intrigued.

Lux didn’t want to start from the beginning. She didn’t want to go through the whole sordid affair. She just wanted Tyler to automatically know what was going on so he could give her advice on what to do – on how to handle herself so she didn’t end up ruining everything with Louis.

“Uh, I guess… uh, it started with Louis showing up on my doorstep at twelve-thirty in the morning on Saturday night,” Lux began.

Tyler gasped louder than anyone she had ever heard gasp, but that was because everything Tyler did was over-the-top. He wanted everyone to know he was there – the center of attention. And secretly, Lux envied that about him.

“He got into a fight with his dad and needed a place to go,” she continued.

“I’m dying over here,” Tyler gushed.

“So well, I let him stay over… in my bed,” Lux explained further.

“That’s my girl,” he said with a proud smile.

“But we just slept. And then Sunday night I went over to his house. And well, things sort of started progressing,” Lux went on and Tyler gasped again for dramatic effect. But Lux was emotionally incapable of looking up at her friend as she relived the night in her head.

“And I… I just… I got so, I guess, turned on,” she said as she felt a blush creep up her cheeks.

“Mm-hmm. Boy is fine,” Tyler said in agreement.

“And I asked him how far he had gone with a girl and he told me everything but sex,” Lux continued.

“LOUIS TOMLINSON IS A VIRGIN!?” Tyler gasped dramatically, gripping tightly onto Lux’s arm.

“Uh, yeah,” she said awkwardly, knowing full well he no longer was.

“Girl… you are not the only one in love with him at this point,” Tyler told her. Lux chuckled a little at his bluntness as she finally looked up at him.

“Go on,” Tyler coaxed her.

“But, uh… so like… yeah. I, uh… I asked him if he was ready for sex…” Lux started again and Tyler’s eyes went wide.

“And then he immediately countered the question without answering. And that was when I told him I thought I was in love with him,” she explained.

“Oh. My. God. You had sex with Louis Tomlinson last night,” Tyler gasped loudly.

Lux nodded her head. She knew he put two-and-two together the second his eyes went wide.

“Excuse me while I scream like a little girl over here! Lux! Oh my god, Lux!” Tyler squealed.

“I just… I don’t know,” she said quietly.

Tyler immediately stopped freaking out to send her a skeptical look, like she was crazy or something.

“Do you regret it?” He asked evenly.

“No,” she told him honestly.

“Do you still love him afterward?” Tyler asked, quirking an eyebrow in question.

“More,” she admitted, feeling her cheeks blush even more, if that were possible.

Tyler bounced in his seat excitedly, clapping his hands together.

“Wait! What did Louis say when you told him you loved him?” Tyler asked, ceasing his celebrating immediately.

“He loves me too, Ty,” Lux said, giving him a bashful smile.

“Oh, Luuuux! Wait… why are you like, super depressed right now?” Tyler asked, narrowing his eyes at her in question.

“I’m not. I just… I don’t know what to do. I don’t know where we stand with each other,” she told him.

“Well, in my head, the outcome of yours and Louis’ lives ends with you two getting married and having millions of sexy babies together and being totally rich because he’s like, going to be a professional soccer player,” Tyler explained to her.

Lux smiled at his scenario. It could happen, right? Well, except for the million babies part. Maybe just a few. Moments later, Lux shook the thought from her head. She needed to live in the present instead of dreaming of the future.

“We’re not dating. We’re just friends and it’s weird. I felt really weird around him today,” Lux explained.

“Well, don’t let it be weird! He’s going to think you regret it. He’s going to think you don’t like him anymore. Lux!” Tyler whined.

“But I do like him,” Lux said quietly.

“Fucking tell him he’s your boyfriend and just go with it,” Tyler told her sternly.

“Oh, yeah. Cause that’s my personality. That’s how I handle things. Hell no,” she said sarcastically, narrowing her eyes at him.

“Make it your personality! Louis Tomlinson is in love with you! You’re in love with him! Damn, Lux. It’s a done deal,” Tyler said matter-of-factly.

“Yeah,” Lux breathed lowly. It was a whole helluva a lot easier said than done.

…

Tyler left her house right around the time her father got home from work with Chinese take-out in tow.

“How was school?” Her dad asked as they sat at the center island counter together.

“Fine,” she said quietly as she picked at the Lo Mein on her plate.

“Got any homework?” He asked, slurping up a noodle.

“No,” she replied simply.

“Did you have fun hanging out with Tyler?” He asked, still trying to make conversation with her even though it was pretty one-sided.

“Sure,” she said, shrugging her shoulders passively.

“I bet you missed hanging out with him after spending so much time with Louis,” he went on, taking a big bite of his sweet & sour chicken.

Lux’s stomach immediately clenched at the mentioning of Louis.

“Yeah,” Lux said carefully.

“Speaking of Louis, have you talked to him?” Her dad asked as if he wanted to bring up Louis all along.

“No, why?” She asked, finally looking up from her food at him.

“I don’t know. It was just his first day back to soccer. I wondered how it went,” he said with a passive shrug.

Lux really did love her father’s love for Louis. It gave her another reason to believe she and Louis would be good together.

“I haven’t talked to him,” Lux said, taking a sip of her water.

“Oh,” he said, taking another big bite of his food.

Lux felt awkward and unpleasant and she kind of just wanted the day to end. She kind of just wanted the first three weeks of soccer practice to end so she and Louis would have an excuse to hang out again. She didn’t really know if she needed an excuse to hang out with him anymore after what happened the previous night, but she would feel more comfortable knowing when she was going to be able to see him again outside of school.

After dinner, Lux insisted she clean up the kitchen. She needed time to think and her dad had some work to get done in the office. Lux washed the dishes by hand rather than loading them in the dish washer. She let it be her therapy, yet she didn’t know how well it actually worked. She was still just as confused once she dried the last dish and put it away.

As she turned off the kitchen light and began her walk to her bedroom to just go to bed – because why not? – the doorbell sounded. Her head immediately turned to the sound of it, confusion flooding her mind. It was a rare occurrence to hear the doorbell because so few people visited.

“Can you get that, Luxy?” She heard her dad call out from the office.

“Yeah, I’ll get it,” Lux called back as she slowly made her way to the front door.

She pulled it open and sucked in a deep breath when she saw Louis standing there.

“Hey,” he said with a timid smile.

“H-hey,” she stammered.

“Can we, uh… talk?” He asked, looking like he was feeling just as awkward as she was.

“Uh, sure,” she said, turning to look back down the hallway to where he father sat in the office. She would rather he not see Louis on their doorstep. He’d start asking questions that she wasn’t prepared to answer.

“Uh, out here?” Lux asked as she stepped out onto the porch and closed the door behind her.

“Sure,” Louis said as the two of them moved over to the porch swing and sat down together.

The silence between them went on a little bit too long and Lux felt nervous because of it.

“Lux…” He said finally, looking over at her.

“Hmm,” she hummed as she bit at her thumbnail. Why did she feel so nervous with him?

“Why do I get the feeling you regret everything we did last night?” Louis asked with a little less confidence in his voice than he usually had.

“Louis…” Lux breathed, looking into his eyes. She could feel her body shaking as the anxiety spread through her.

“You can tell me,” he said with his big wondering eyes.

“Louis, I don’t,” she said quietly, shifting in her seat, causing the porch swing to sway a bit.

“You don’t?” He choked out and Lux shook her head.

“Then why… why are you acting so… weird?” He asked.

Lux cringed at that word. Weird. She was hoping he didn’t notice.

“Because, Louis. Because I’m weird. I’m awkward. I’m uncomfortable almost all the time. Haven’t you noticed?” She asked, feeling the anxiety rising in her chest.

“Yeah,” he breathed lowly, looking away from her.

“I’m sorry,” Lux apologized for acting the way she did, even though she couldn’t really help it.

“I just… I thought you regretted it and… I don’t know. It made me sad,” he admitted, which made her feel even worse knowing she made him sad.

“I don’t regret it, Louis. I can promise you that,” she told him evenly.

“I don’t either,” he said, looking over at her with the tiniest of smiles on his lips.

“Good,” Lux said quietly.

“Good,” he agreed with a nod of his head.

The two of them sat in silence for a bit. Lux’s knees were pulled up to her chest as Louis’ feet kicked off of the ground, slowly giving the swing momentum to move.

“How was soccer?” Lux asked, trying to bridge the gap between them. The silence was making her incredibly nervous.

“Good. Tiring. I haven’t even been home yet. I came straight here,” he told her.

Lux looked up at him, feeling a rush of love. He came directly to her house from soccer practice because he couldn’t bear to go home wondering if she regretted their night together.

Oh, Louis.

Lux leaned over quickly, kissing him on the mouth, letting it linger an extra few seconds before she pulled back. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Louis smiling to himself. And only seconds later, the front door opened, revealing her dad. The panic rose exponentially when she realized he might have seen them kissing.

“Louis! Hey,” her dad greeted him immediately, like they were old friends and Lux was able to relax, realizing her father didn’t witness their intimate moment.

“Hey!” Louis said standing up, shaking her father’s hand.

“I was wondering who was at the door,” her dad said, smiling between the two of them.

“I just came by after practice to say hey to Lux,” Louis told him. Her father was beaming ear-to-ear, which made her entirely too uncomfortable.

“Of course you did,” her dad said, bouncing his eyebrows at Louis. Lux felt awkward. Truly awkward.

“So, how was your first day of practice? Did the coaches work you guys to the bone?” Her dad chuckled.

“Of course they did. No pain, no gain,” Louis snickered.

“That’s right, Louis. Remember that. You gotta work hard to get where you’re going,” her dad told him as he patted him on the shoulder.

“For sure,” Louis agreed.

“How’re the old feet feeling?” Her dad asked him.

“Feeling great. I was doing pretty well today during warm-up,” Louis explained.

“Good to hear,” her dad said through a smile.

“I’m pretty confident this season is going to be the best by far,” Louis told him.

“That’s what I like to hear,” her dad chuckled.

“I should probably get going. I’m pretty beat. I just wanted to stop by and say ‘hey’,” Louis said, looking over at Lux.

Her dad looked over too, probably coming to the realization that he was invading their space.

“Oh, sure. Sure. I’ll see you, Louis,” her dad said, shaking Louis’ hand again.

“Yes. Definitely,” Louis said, smiling at him.

“I’m going to walk him to his car,” Lux told her dad.

“Okay,” he said, opening the front door as Lux and Louis descended the porch steps.

As they were walking down the path, Lux turned back to see her dad go in the house and close the door.

“He’s probably watching us from the front window,” she told Louis as they reached his car.

“So, a kiss is out of the question then?” Louis asked with a small smile. Lux fidgeted noticeably, shifting from one foot to the next.

“How about a hug?” He compromised.

Lux nodded and let Louis wrap his arms around her. The hug lingered and a part of her was grateful for the contact, while the other part of her was nervous of her father seeing it.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Louis breathed in her ear.

“Yeah,” she said, pulling back.

Louis gave her a quick smile before he got in the car and started it up. As Lux walked back up the front path, Louis drove away.

When she got back in the house, her dad was nonchalantly sitting on the couch looking at a magazine – which was obvious he just picked up a second before she walked in the house. He looked up, eyeing her skeptically.

“What?” Lux asked, standing there feeling completely awkward.

“Nothing,” he said with a sneaky little smirk on his face.

“Yeah, that’s why you can’t stop smiling,” Lux scoffed as she rolled her eyes.

“He likes you. I don’t know why you can’t see that,” her dad said with a sly smirk, causing Lux to scoff immediately.

“Don’t think I didn’t see that hug, Luxy,” he said, smirking at her.

“Oh my god. I’m going to bed,” she told him as she started walking down the hallway.

“What is so hard about giving that boy a chance?” Her dad called after her.

“Goodnight!” Lux called back before she shut her bedroom door.

Oh, Dad. She already gave him a chance. And it was going wonderfully.

Notes