Underneath

The hospital is massive. I get directions from the lady at reception and forget them instantly as I squeak frantically down endless corridors. After what seems like an eternity of searching, I find the right place. Instead of the tearful reunion with my parents I was expecting, I’m sent to wait alone in bleak family room.

With nothing else to do I check my phone. Two new messages from Harry. ‘I’m here for you babe.’ Then five minutes later, ’and I meant what I said last night.’ Before I can process this further, my tearful mum bursts into the room…

…So yesterday, dad had a heart attack. He went to bed thinking he was coming down with a cold or something. When my mum checked on him an hour later, he was on the floor gasping for breath.

Eventually, I’m allowed in to see him. I struggle to hide my shock, he doesn’t look like my dad anymore. He looks so small in the bed, grey and frail, hooked up to machines that beep energetically. He tries to be brave and crack a few jokes but the truth is he looks terrified. My mum looks like she's been completely hollowed out.

I stay with dad while she goes and gets something to eat. “And where we’re you last night then?” he rasps as soon as she's gone. I prepare the lie on my lips but…“Don’t bother!” he smirks. Dad can always see right through me. “What’s his name then?” he adds before I can speak. “Don't worry, your mother doesn’t suspect anything!” he adds with a wink.

“Harry,” I say quietly, watching dad warily. “Nice boy is he?” he asks. I smile shyly and answer “of course!” “Why is he with you then?” jokes my dad. “Watch it!” I say slapping his shoulder, you’re not that sick!”

We chat a bit more, mostly about mum and how freaked out she is. I figure he doesn’t want to talk about himself. I think I’ve got away with it and he’s moved on, then, “boy from school is he?” and I know I must look guilty. “Well er…” I start, but thankfully, mum walks in at the perfect moment.

We hang out together, joking and messing around, pretending everything’s fine. We can’t persuade mum to go home though, she's determined to stay with dad through the night.

Later on, I step out for a quick breath of air and flick Harry a text. Just a general update, and a small kiss. It’s strange, so far in my life, whenever something bad is happening, I want my mum. Now, the main person I want to hug me is Harry. Feels like a betrayal, or something more scary…the first step to growing up.

I daren't make any arrangements to see him though. I’m sure he won’t be interested in my miserable face. I’ll see him when I’m feeling more positive about everything. Right now I’m barley holding it all together for my parents sake.

At 7pm mum really will not be shifted and visiting hours are over. I kiss dad and hug him close. We fist bump like we always do and I hug mum tightly, whispering to call me if anything happens.

Outside, its already dark and cold. Snarling traffic clogs the roads and I suddenly feel very tired and lonely. Briefly, I hear footsteps behind me then…I’m enclosed by strong arms into a warm hug. My beautiful Harry.

Ⓒ SphinxWriter13 2017

Notes