We Took A Chance

Once I knew I was on my own, I started to plan my big move. First thing I did was apply to the university. When the acceptance letter came in, it all felt so real. I really was going to London. I used the acceptance letter to provide proof for my student visa. All the meanwhile I was attending class with enthusiasm as I needed straight A's this semester. For once in the past year I have found motivation. My spare time I spent it studying and applying for scholarships. I felt tired and a bit overwhelmed but I knew it would be worth it. This big move made me forget for a bit of my problems and I even felt happy.

It was the end of the semester when I got a call from my father.
"Hello?" I answered as I opened the fridge leaning in to search for something to snack on.
"How are you sweetie?" my dad asked on the other side. It was very uncommon for him to call me. When he did, it was usually school related.
"I'm fine, thanks. What's going on?" I questioned as I know my grades had been impeccable and so were my finals just this week.
"I know I kind of went off on you about moving to London. I feel really bad, sweetie. I want to make it up to you and I want to offer to pay for your ticket there. Take it as a goodbye gift." I know he can't see but I widen my eyes at his sudden change of heart. The ticket there would be my most expensive item right now.
"Wow, dad, I would really appreciate that. Thank you." I honestly was grateful.
"No worries. I just want to help you, I already know that you going is not going to change. I'm looking forward to seeing your grades for this semester. Can't believe you'll finally have your Bachelor's degree!"
"I know, dad. I can promise you my grades will be the best."

The thing is, I am in college studying to be a journalist only because my parents wanted that for me. Bad grades are never an option. When I graduated high school, I wanted time off. I had planned to travel the world with Andrew. It was my dream. We were dead set on backpacking through South America but when I told my parents of the idea, they freaked. So there went my dreams of exploring the world. Instead my father pressured me into journalism as he knows that the lead anchorwoman in his tv station would be retiring in a few years and I would be the one to replace her. So it was, I entered into the journalism world and it ended up growing on me. I can't say it's my dream, my passion, but I tolerate it. I still feel like there's something missing, which is why moving to London might be what will get me out of this funk. Maybe what I need is London.

-.-.-

My eyes lit up every time a new scholarship acceptance letter came in the mail. I felt relieved to know that with the money from all the scholarships combined, I would be able to pay for all school related things including the fees for living in the halls as they call the dorm rooms. Now I just needed a part time job for spending money once I get there. The end of the semester was just last week. It was middle of December and I was going to leave just after Christmas day. I couldn't believe how fast the time flew, I was leaving in just a little over 1 week. I was planning on only taking a couple of suitcases with items I couldn't part with as well as clothes. The rest of my stuff I donated to the local salvation army. My beautiful red camaro was traded in for a new car for my mother. You can guess she insisted my father do that because she still felt she had the right and my father still fell for her pleads.

For Christmas, I never went home and now much less since my family is not a family anymore. Instead I spent it at home watching Christmas movies. I did, however, did a gift exchange with Leah.
"Open yours first!" she insisted as she pushed a tiny gift bag towards me. It was clearly from a jewelry store. I smiled before I took out the crinkly gift bag paper and found a tan box. When I opened it, I felt my eyes sting with growing tears.
"Oh, Leah, I love it!" I couldn't hold back the tears as I took out a charm bracelet that had a couple charms to symbolize our friendship.
"Read the note!" she exclaimed as she looked on with excited eyes. I took out the note and it read;
Zoe,
You have been my best friend for four years and I'm sad to see you go. I'm going to miss you but I'll leave it up to you to fill this bracelet with more charms to symbolize important events in your life.
Lots of love, Leah

I felt very nostalgic at the thought of this. I launched forward and embraced Leah tightly. I was going to miss this crazy girl so much.
"Leah, this is the best gift ever. Thank you. Now open mine." I said as I put a blue box with a big white bow on it on her hands. I watched for her reaction as she opened the box and pulled out its contents.
"Zoe.. Wow.. I... Fuck you're going to make me cry." she sobbed as she took the book in her hands. The title read, 40 Reasons Why You'll Always Be My Best friend, and I could see the sadness in her eyes as she began reading. Each page had a reason and pictures of us starting from when we met to most recently. We both knew this was essentially our goodbye, so we tried to make the best of it. Tomorrow I was finally leaving for London.

-.-.-

The airport was buzzing with holiday flyers. The lines were crazy long and this made my anxiety grow. I can only imagine how busy Heathrow airport will be in London. The flight was long but it helped that I slept most of it. I didn't have time to overthink this. It was too late to back out anyway.

Upon arriving at Heathrow I took a deep breath and realized this was my home now. This would be the air I'd breathe for the next two years. I was thousands of miles away from home. It suddenly hit me, I'm completely on my own now. I know absolutely no one here, but this was my new life.

Notes

I'm doing a double update today. :)