Torn

CALLIE'S POINT OF VIEW

I'm not exactly sure how I feel about myself walking to our school to meet Calum right now. It's not because I'm afraid he'll make me go back- Well, that's part of it. The thing about Calum is that he can make me do the stupidest things, whether he realizes he's making me or not. Just him hurting my feelings can lead me to do something reckless, and just him saying the word 'please' or 'for me', leads me to do whatever he wants. He's like poison, but I love it and I love him.

I'm afraid he's going to take my hands, look into my eyes, and say, "Please come back, Callie." Because then it'll be all over for me, and I'll go back. The pain will get worse, CPS will get worse, everything will get worse, but I'd still do it for him.

I've always been aware that he had this affect on me, this isn't anything new. I guess I'm finally talking about it because this time it could actually effect everything in my life if he does it.

I'm also afraid he'll support me, because I know he doesn't want to. I'll look at him, and he'll look like a sad puppy that's been kicked, and I'll have to go back. For him.

A couple of times I stop and debate with myself if I should really be doing this. On one hand, I'm head over heels in love with him and I want to see him again and hear his voice again, and on another hand, all of those things could make me throw this all away and go back to pain.

By the time I reach the back of the school, I see Calum, sleeping against the building. I snort, and walk over to him. I tap him with my shoe and he pops up to see who it is. Once he sees it's just me he smiles. A lot.

"Uh-" He looks around at the fact that he's sleeping behind the school. "We didn't set a time." I smile.

"Soo what, you just decided to sleep out here all night?" I laugh.

"Yeah," He stands up, dusting off his pants, "I didn't wanna miss you." He shrugs. I feel my cheeks go hot. "So how's the whole running away thing going?"

"Do you want me to be honest?"

"Yes. One hundred percent."

"It's... Really great." I pause. "I mean it isn't an ideal living situation or anything, but right now it's working." I bite my lip nervously. He just keeps looking at me. And not how he usually does, now he's looking at me in an almost.. Sad, kind of way. Calum isn't usually sad. None of us, are usually sad. "I'll just do it until they move me to a different foster home, and then-"

"Wait, what?" Calum interrupts, frowning.

"I'll stay out here until they move me to a different foster home-"

"No no I heard you. Callie, that could take forever. They probably don't even know you're missing yet, I mean I'm certain Jonathan hasn't called them. And even when they do find you, however long that might take, you really think they'll just move you to a different home?" And suddenly every bit of my plan sounds incredibly stupid. "You told me earlier that you're already hanging on by a string with them because of other things you've done, and running away is against the law, don't you think they might just arrest you?"

"That'd be better than where I am now." I frown.

"I know it would be, but only by a little bit. Why not just get emancipated and get your own apartment?" He asks.

"Like I have the money for that." I roll my eyes. "I'd have to be rich."

"Well." Calum bites his lip.

"What?"

"My mum didn't want me to tell you, since it was for emergencies with you and everything, but she sorta has like. Two college funds worth of money for you.."

"What?!" I nearly scream. "Wait, wait, why would she do that?"

"Because she adores you. I mean when we were kids you were practically her daughter too." I'd completely forgotten about the hours a day I'd spend at Calum's house. How could I forget about those days? Back when everything was easy. I had two parents, I had a best friend with nothing romantic going on between us, and I'd always be at Calum's house, rather than my own. "When you were like nine she said that she was talking to you in the kitchen and you said something about being scared of your house because of your dad, and how your mum always talked about leaving him, and I guess my mum got worried for you and started to save money." He shrugs.

"Dude, why wouldn't you tell me about this?" I frown.

"Because unless you really needed it, my mum wanted to keep it for when you're an adult and want to get a house."

"But don't you think I needed it a few months ago?!"

"You told me not to tell anyone and I couldn't get the money from her unless I told her."

"Right, right." I nod.

"So. Which sounds better, emancipation and your own apartment and finally taking your life back, or sleeping on a bench in the cold." Calum looks at me. Oh, wait, that wasn't rhetorical?

"I still have to stay here until the paperwork and everything gets done." I say.

"You could stay at my house, I doubt my mum would even think about telling Jonathan where you are."

"And.. Us?"

He bites his lip. "Um. I don't- I don't know. Whatever you want to do."

"Friends?"

---

"Oh I forgot to tell you, you look good." Calum smiles at me as we approach his driveway.

"Good?" I question. "Don't you mean fabulous?" I raise my eyebrows.

He laughs, "Yes, you look fabulous."

"Thank you."

He opens the door to his pretty two story blue house, and his mum immediately runs over from the living room, "Callie, sweetie!" She gives me a hug, petting my hair, "Oh god I missed you."

I smile. "I missed you too."

She pulls away, keeping her hands on my shoulders, "Calum told me everything over the phone, I'm so so sorry, I would've done something sooner if I'd known, although I do understand why you didn't want to say anything. I was in a home like that too, when I was your age."

I raise my eyebrows. "Really?" She's so- I don't know, she's so sweet, and well put together. She has a husband, kids, a beautiful house. How could she come from a home like mine?

"Yep." She nodded. "Calum, why don't you go get the guest room ready for Callie?" Calum nods and walks upstairs, giving me a cheesy wink on his way. Joy (his mum), leads me into the living room and sits down next to me on the couch. "My first memory of things being bad was when I was about six. My mother was holding me and telling me that she'd see me again someday, and I was- Well, clearly confused, I was six." Joy chuckles. "Then I remember her climbing out of the window, telling me it's going to be okay." She frowns. "When I looked out the window, she was running down the street. I didn't know how she could possibly just run like that, I mean, I didn't know what was so bad." She pauses. "Then when I was nine I finally started understanding why she climbed out the window. My dad was hurting her. When he found out she left he started hurting me. I never understood why she wouldn't have just taken me with her though, and why she'd leave me in my room like that. Probably so my dad wouldn't have gone looking for her." She shrugs.

"That's... Terrible." I frown.

She nods. "Yep. I was about sixteen like you, when I finally had enough of the hurt. We didn't have any other family, like you, so I decided to leave like my mum did. I packed a bag, and I was gone. I didn't have any friends, none like Calum, where someone actually cares enough to help me. Then the cops found me and I went to juvie. Luckily someone bailed me out within a week, but they wouldn't tell me who. Sometimes I like to think it was my mum, helping me out. Anyway. I started volunteering at a lot of different places so I was never at home, and that's when I met Calum's dad." She smiles.

I was practically speechless. "W-Wow."

She laughs, "Very wow, yes. Anyways, I just wanted you to know that even though it feels like you are, you aren't alone in what's happening. And I won't tell Jonathan where you are, that piece of trash can burn in hell for all I care." I laugh.

"Thank you."

Notes

YAS JOY MY BAE IS IN THIS STORY NOW BITCHES WOOOOOOO