Incidental
The Truth
SAM
I awake randomly, rolling over to the clock showing me 2:34 AM. I reach out and push it away to shield my eyes from its harsh blueish green light. I kick the covers off, lying flat on my back. The calm stillness of the night is suddenly disrupted by pleading moans and lustful whimpers.
I groan. "Really? Why can I hear this?"
I pull the pillow out from under my head and place it on top to drown out the noise. I quickly find it hard to breathe and give up on the plush noise blocker.
"Why did I not think this was going to happen?" I argue with myself.
I sigh deeply, slip out of bed and grab some flip flops before making my way out of the house and to the beach. The sand is illuminated by the bright moonlight as I make my way down to the water. The flannel I stole from Harry flares out against the gentle ocean breeze. I sit in the sand far enough away from the water, staring up into the sky. The stars shine brighter then back home and leave me mesmerized in thought. I lay back and close my eyes surrounding myself with the sounds of the beachy nature.
Cade would have loved this. The peacefulness, the serenity, the love.
I don't know how much time passes as I lay in my stoic state, but my senses return to life to the strong scent of a cigarette. I open my eyes to see Harry standing above me.
"How long have you been out here?" He asks, taking a drag from his cigarette.
"I don't know." I answer honestly, noticing how significantly darker it has gotten.
I sit up brushing the sand off my arms sensing Harry sit next to me. I continue my dusting as he digs his feet into the sand.
"So, are you going to tell me what's going on or are you going to continue to pretend that everything is alright?" He asks calmly.
I pause before turning my head slightly to look at him. "It's my battle."
"Is it?" He pushes.
"Yes, Harry."
He shakes his head. "I don't think it's about Cade anymore."
"What?" I barely gasp. "How dare yo--"
"No! How dare you, Sam! How dare you for lying to me!"
"I'm not lying!" I try to speak but his thunderous voice over powers mine.
"No, you are going to listen to me!" He points. "I'm tired of trying to guess what your problem is! But you know what happened today? It finally hit me! You. Are. Jealous!"
"What?" I shake my head furiously. "No."
"Yes! I saw it written all over your face. Just admit it, Sam! You are--"
"Fine!" I shout, my voice coming out very strong. "You're right! I'm jealous because Blair is taking away the only thing I have left that's special in my life. Are you happy? Are you?!"
I get up and storm towards the house. I have no regard for being quiet as I reach my bedroom door and slam it. Tomorrow, I was leaving and there was nothing Harry or Blair could do about it.
In the morning, I fib some bullshit excuse to Blair about being sick and hail a bus back home. I avoided Harry at all costs, still angry at how he exploited my weakness. 250 dollars later and I'm back home in my bland apartment. I instantly gravitate to Harry's room, opening the door. Was I really going to do this to myself?
Yes.
I track into his room and crawl under the sheets. His scent still briefly lingers as I press my face against the pillow. I don't move from the room much for the next two days, bumming out and stealing the premium channels of Harry's tv. I find myself alone for another night as some sappy love story movie plays mindlessly in the background. What a lucky girl she is getting the guy she wants. My eyelids pull with a defeated sleep as I snuggle down under the covers. It doesn't take long for me to grow tired of the movie and let slumber take over me.
Halfway through the night and I feel hot, really hot. My eyes shot open as I try to kick off the covers. I notice the television is still on as I grab the remote to turn it off.
"Hey, I'm watching that." Harry chimes, walking into the room.
"Oh god, I'm so sorry. Oh, this is so creepy. I--I can explain."
He laughs. "Ok, I think I might want to hear this."
I look at him and sigh in defeat. I slide out of the bed, met with Harry blocking my path.
"I didn't say you had to leave."
"But, it's your bed." I point.
"Plenty of room for two." He smiles. "Besides, your favorite movie is on." He thumbs back. I glance at the television noting Ocean's 13.
I smile at the fact that Harry remembered that mindlessly slipping back in bed.
"That's all it takes? Damn." Harry chirps.
"What? No. Shut up." I whine.
"Lighten up, I was joking." He says, sitting on the bed beside me.
"Wait." I pause, realizing he is home from the vacation early. "Shouldn't you be at the beach still?" He shrugs.
"Blair and I got bored, weather got shitty, so we decided to come home early to save a couple bucks."
"Oh." I pause again. "So, how long have you been home?"
"You mean how long have you been sleeping in my bed beside me? About 3 hours." I blush. "Sorry."
"Like I said, no big deal." He shrugs. "Still waiting on that explanation though."
I nudge him with my shoulder letting out a slight laugh.
We watch the movie for a couple minutes before Harry speaks up again.
"Do you really feel that way?"
"What way?" I question.
"That Blair is taking me away from you."
I look at him then back down to my hands. "Well, yeah."
"Why?" He asks.
"Because why would you keep me around if you are with her?"
"Uh, because we are friends Sam." He sasses. "No where does it say that I can't have friends that are girls."
I sigh. "You're right. But things are different."
"How?" I shrug. "I mean, you are in my bed right now and Blair is not." He points out.
"But it's wrong. I wouldn't want my boyfriend to have another girl in his bed." I shake my head.
"It's not like we are doing anything." He sounds annoyed. "And Blair knows our background, but if you feel this is so "wrong"-" He uses his fingers as quotes. "Then please, by all means, you can leave."
I look at him with pleading eyes before falling into him with a hug. I feel his hand gently run down my back.
"Well, that solves that." He laughs.
I don't even argue his statement, slinking deeper into his side. I hear him sigh deeply, wrapping his arm around my shoulder.
"You drive me crazy, do you know that?"
I laugh softly and nod my head.
"Thought so." He groans before bringing the covers up and turning the television off.
I fall asleep in Harry's company tonight as his friend but deep down I knew I wanted so much more. On the other hand, I see how happy he is with Blair and how happy Blair is with Harry, so who am I to destroy that because of my own personal loss.
I awake randomly, rolling over to the clock showing me 2:34 AM. I reach out and push it away to shield my eyes from its harsh blueish green light. I kick the covers off, lying flat on my back. The calm stillness of the night is suddenly disrupted by pleading moans and lustful whimpers.
I groan. "Really? Why can I hear this?"
I pull the pillow out from under my head and place it on top to drown out the noise. I quickly find it hard to breathe and give up on the plush noise blocker.
"Why did I not think this was going to happen?" I argue with myself.
I sigh deeply, slip out of bed and grab some flip flops before making my way out of the house and to the beach. The sand is illuminated by the bright moonlight as I make my way down to the water. The flannel I stole from Harry flares out against the gentle ocean breeze. I sit in the sand far enough away from the water, staring up into the sky. The stars shine brighter then back home and leave me mesmerized in thought. I lay back and close my eyes surrounding myself with the sounds of the beachy nature.
Cade would have loved this. The peacefulness, the serenity, the love.
I don't know how much time passes as I lay in my stoic state, but my senses return to life to the strong scent of a cigarette. I open my eyes to see Harry standing above me.
"How long have you been out here?" He asks, taking a drag from his cigarette.
"I don't know." I answer honestly, noticing how significantly darker it has gotten.
I sit up brushing the sand off my arms sensing Harry sit next to me. I continue my dusting as he digs his feet into the sand.
"So, are you going to tell me what's going on or are you going to continue to pretend that everything is alright?" He asks calmly.
I pause before turning my head slightly to look at him. "It's my battle."
"Is it?" He pushes.
"Yes, Harry."
He shakes his head. "I don't think it's about Cade anymore."
"What?" I barely gasp. "How dare yo--"
"No! How dare you, Sam! How dare you for lying to me!"
"I'm not lying!" I try to speak but his thunderous voice over powers mine.
"No, you are going to listen to me!" He points. "I'm tired of trying to guess what your problem is! But you know what happened today? It finally hit me! You. Are. Jealous!"
"What?" I shake my head furiously. "No."
"Yes! I saw it written all over your face. Just admit it, Sam! You are--"
"Fine!" I shout, my voice coming out very strong. "You're right! I'm jealous because Blair is taking away the only thing I have left that's special in my life. Are you happy? Are you?!"
I get up and storm towards the house. I have no regard for being quiet as I reach my bedroom door and slam it. Tomorrow, I was leaving and there was nothing Harry or Blair could do about it.
In the morning, I fib some bullshit excuse to Blair about being sick and hail a bus back home. I avoided Harry at all costs, still angry at how he exploited my weakness. 250 dollars later and I'm back home in my bland apartment. I instantly gravitate to Harry's room, opening the door. Was I really going to do this to myself?
Yes.
I track into his room and crawl under the sheets. His scent still briefly lingers as I press my face against the pillow. I don't move from the room much for the next two days, bumming out and stealing the premium channels of Harry's tv. I find myself alone for another night as some sappy love story movie plays mindlessly in the background. What a lucky girl she is getting the guy she wants. My eyelids pull with a defeated sleep as I snuggle down under the covers. It doesn't take long for me to grow tired of the movie and let slumber take over me.
Halfway through the night and I feel hot, really hot. My eyes shot open as I try to kick off the covers. I notice the television is still on as I grab the remote to turn it off.
"Hey, I'm watching that." Harry chimes, walking into the room.
"Oh god, I'm so sorry. Oh, this is so creepy. I--I can explain."
He laughs. "Ok, I think I might want to hear this."
I look at him and sigh in defeat. I slide out of the bed, met with Harry blocking my path.
"I didn't say you had to leave."
"But, it's your bed." I point.
"Plenty of room for two." He smiles. "Besides, your favorite movie is on." He thumbs back. I glance at the television noting Ocean's 13.
I smile at the fact that Harry remembered that mindlessly slipping back in bed.
"That's all it takes? Damn." Harry chirps.
"What? No. Shut up." I whine.
"Lighten up, I was joking." He says, sitting on the bed beside me.
"Wait." I pause, realizing he is home from the vacation early. "Shouldn't you be at the beach still?" He shrugs.
"Blair and I got bored, weather got shitty, so we decided to come home early to save a couple bucks."
"Oh." I pause again. "So, how long have you been home?"
"You mean how long have you been sleeping in my bed beside me? About 3 hours." I blush. "Sorry."
"Like I said, no big deal." He shrugs. "Still waiting on that explanation though."
I nudge him with my shoulder letting out a slight laugh.
We watch the movie for a couple minutes before Harry speaks up again.
"Do you really feel that way?"
"What way?" I question.
"That Blair is taking me away from you."
I look at him then back down to my hands. "Well, yeah."
"Why?" He asks.
"Because why would you keep me around if you are with her?"
"Uh, because we are friends Sam." He sasses. "No where does it say that I can't have friends that are girls."
I sigh. "You're right. But things are different."
"How?" I shrug. "I mean, you are in my bed right now and Blair is not." He points out.
"But it's wrong. I wouldn't want my boyfriend to have another girl in his bed." I shake my head.
"It's not like we are doing anything." He sounds annoyed. "And Blair knows our background, but if you feel this is so "wrong"-" He uses his fingers as quotes. "Then please, by all means, you can leave."
I look at him with pleading eyes before falling into him with a hug. I feel his hand gently run down my back.
"Well, that solves that." He laughs.
I don't even argue his statement, slinking deeper into his side. I hear him sigh deeply, wrapping his arm around my shoulder.
"You drive me crazy, do you know that?"
I laugh softly and nod my head.
"Thought so." He groans before bringing the covers up and turning the television off.
I fall asleep in Harry's company tonight as his friend but deep down I knew I wanted so much more. On the other hand, I see how happy he is with Blair and how happy Blair is with Harry, so who am I to destroy that because of my own personal loss.
Please update!
9/15/16