The Test Subject

His face was cool against my palm. With every touch came new understanding. I understood the root of his sadness, his lack of trust because Ashton was once wronged. The world had played Ashton like a puppet. I understand his hatred, and his paranoia that the world is against him. The urge to touch his temples came upon my senses. What harm could come from simply touching a certain part of his perfect face? I didn't even care about his messy golden hair or the fact he had sweat forming all over his forehead. All Ashtons imperfections made him look even more perfect.
When i eventually touched his temple a automatic electric shot through my body, igniting a single black and white moving image. As soon as i got the shock, my natural reaction was to remove my cold hand. Ashton was still sleep talking, mumbling startling things that could only make sense if you indeed, knew Ashtons story. I would be lying if i said i wasn't intrigued. "Ashton, im here for you" i spoke soothingly. Against my better judgement, i took hold of his hand. Using my thumb to gently make small invisible circles. A noticeable change in his behavior stunned me. He was no longer writhing or saying such confusing things. I decided to wake him up to the arising sun light from outside. No doubt Miss Butts has ordered numerous guards to find us, probably looking forward to testing out her new wicked punishments for our absence.
I shook Ashton softly, using on half of my strength to push. I couldn't help but think of Ashton as a little child. I felt oddly protective of him, i felt the need to look after him and makes sure hes constantly safe. I shrugged the thoughts away. Ashtons nature green eyes locked onto mine, as his eyes fluttered open. Relief flooded his features as he realized his night terrors are nothing but night terrors. Nothing to fear, well apart from the looming death we all face if we do not get a move on. "we need to go" i stated. Ashton sighed while rubbing the noticeable sweat away from his face. My eyebrows frowned together in embarrassment. I now know why Ashton had a smug look on his face and of course it was my fault. We were extremely close, his hot body temperature finding its way to my own. His contrasting breath could be felt under my chin, some what tickling me. Despite knowing, and feeling our closeness i refused to removed my secure hand from his rising and falling hard chest. "we should go before we get caught" i suggested, breaking our strong eye contact. "you mean before they rob us of our freedom" Ashton counted. i nodded. "yeah that..."
For the past fifteen minuets, Ashton and i have been hand crafting weapons from bits and pieces all around the room. I at first protested against any kind of violence, but the persuasive Ashton changed my mind... as always. We used various objects such as table legs, metal poles and even a sharpened pencil. I robbed the table of the leg, evidently making it falling down. I was proud at my newly found strength. I guess with the idea of freedom as motivation, you could do literally anything. I sighed at the not so subtle conflict between Ashton and Alice. The hatred between the two will not get us the victory we deserve. The wooden leg wasn't as heavy as predicted i was sure of the damaged it was capable off . Obviously with the strength driven behind it. I saw how Ashton started fiddling with a sharpener. While Alice did nothing but stare hopelessly at the wall. I thought back to last night. The discussion between Ashton and i solely about whether or not we should leave her. Leaving her behind could be a great waste. She seems smart and able but above all sensitive. Being sensitive could get you hurt, as well as others.It has occurred to me, more than once that she could be dangerous. Especially with the weakness of the reminder of her sister Marie. But in the end we all have prominent weaknesses, that's what makes us human. No one in this cruel world is truly fearless."are you ready?" Ashton spoke, snapping me out my train of thoughts. I looked down at the leg and nodded. I doubt this would be enough to kill someone but like i said, it depends on strength driven behind it. "in any resolution there are casualties but if you do as i say there wont be any on our side ok?" Ashton said
"but i know the layout of this place" i defended
"but i have what it takes to kill someone, you don't. And that fear of taking a life makes you weak"
"your Wrong, it makes her Human" Alice suddenly said, standing up and walking confidently to my side. "and you'll do well to remember that Ashton, while your bashing someones skull through" Alice smiled innocently at him. Ashton and i stared wide eyed at the changed girl next to me. Alice took power in our sudden confusion, she cocked her head to the left and still continued to grin at the man in front of her. The atmosphere got awkward and i almost crippled under the tension. Ashton looked at me for guidance, or some kind of answers but quite frankly, i was all out of them. "maybe we could just avoid any confrontation, that way all our hands are clean of blood. We're innocent" i suggested, looking down at the floor. Alice and also Ashton scoffed. "im crazy, whats your excuse?" Alice spoke harshly. Mocking the idea of hiding in the shadows. Alice must have noticed me cringing. "look Lilly, you have been nothing but nice to me from the start and for that i will forever be in your debt, ok? so when i say your wrong, you better believe me" her tone of voice was much softer but still demanding. She grabbed my wrists suddenly. "deep down you know im right. Imagine getting retribution on every last one of them. Imagine making the people that caused you pain through out your life, beg for death." Alice's eyes were glossy. "we could get our of this place, what more could you want?" i thought about all the possibilities, all the times i have cried myself to sleep. I suddenly got angry. How dare they try to change everything i stood for? "i want you to get out of my face" i spat. I snapped my wrist from her grasp. "you can take a life, i mean its easy enough right? but remember you're no better than Miss Butts." i spoke before walking out of the room. I was alone once again.
I instantly knew this was a bad idea. I knew that rage was the most powerful stupid emotion you could ever feel. It makes you make reckless decisions that clouds your senses. I knew better , of course i knew better. Walking off is a good way to get yourself killed. But i also standing round waiting for the people you abandoned is also a good way to sign your death sentence. The silence put every hair on my body on edge, my hands shook due to obvious nerves and my eyes darted almost everywhere. I miss Becca, i miss Zayn and i most certainty miss Harry. I hope he wasn't punished for his friendship with me severely. When your in hell, your hopes and wishes go unnoticed. Becca, was most likely still mad at me. Who would blame her? my anger has been out of check lately and unfortunately she has been the target for my outbursts. Becca has always been quite different than most. Guards call her crazy, taunt her when shes weak, not me. She need not be ashamed of who she is. Zayn was probably comforting her when it should be me. He was a great friend and it was obvious they suited. I followed the continuing hallway.
Files upon files was all i could see. Each one filled up with information. Every experiment, every single one that went wrong and maybe me could all be contained in a week cabinet. It was fragile, fragile enough for me to break it anyway. This was stupid. A risk that may not even pay off.
My curiosity would always be the reason of my demise. It wasn't my fault though. The cabinets were practically screaming 'look at me'. Knowing about my mother and perhaps my father was tempting enough but knowing what they plan to do to me was my motivation to go against my better judgment. As i walked into the room with many metal desks covered in paperwork finished and unfinished, i couldn't keep a lid on my excitement. Rightfully so i think. All my unanswered questions would finally be answered after 17 years of waiting. "okay , okay , okay" i mumbled to myself. Figuring out which metal cabinet contains information solely based on me wasn't as easy as i originally thought.
I looked around and around and back around. My eyes gazing almost everything. In my attempt to find something i came across a laminate card that red subject one. I looked down at the clothing Ashton had handed me. It didn't have no subject number on it. In some pathetic way i was free. I was no longer a poor test subject. My shoulders slumped at the thought i was now a mental patient. I sighed. I'm physically and emotionally drained. My fingers dragged across the black writing on the white page. The words were hard and rough against my soft hand. I was now feeling the nerves of discovering who i am, and what will becoming of me. I feared my time would run out. I feared guards were on there way hunting me down relentlessly. They might already have Ashton and Alice, more likely if they have split up.
I wasn't in the slightest prepared for what i was about to read... The pages were ripped, crinkles forming due to the way i held it. I was sick. I was beyond angry, beyond tired and certainty beyond forgiving.They observed me like a zoo animal. Watching while i slept. I rubbed my temples. What kind of life is this? what person has to read things like this.
Have we created a monster repeated in my mind like a stubborn song lyric. I'm considered a monster to people? I'm so confused. Actually beyond confused. Beyond the confusion i heard screams, yelling uncontrollably. Its strange, it kind of sounded like Harry, but that's impossible. Harry would of got fired, just for being friends with me. I ran out of the cluttered room, only with Harry in mind. Ashton was face to face with him, Alice was hiding behind Ashton like the coward she is. She wasn't the strong person she was a few hours ago, no, she was mouse like. I wanted the never ending conflict to go, evaporate into thin air. Without thinking twice i ran between the raging war between them both. Harry s eyes go wide and its then i realize the darkness surrounding his face. I knew Miss Butts wouldn't let him of easy but this is beyond heart breaking. His jaw was covered in a mixture of blue and purple, unlike mine. It took everything in me to restraint from touching him. I knew i betrayed his trust by being here with Ashton but right now i don't care.
"They're after us and your acting like children by fighting. Just stop" i shouted at both Ashton and Harry. "He's after us, Lily" Ashton pointed towards Harry who looked straight past me. I could sense the tension between them both. It was crumbling to be in the middle of it. "Harry wouldn't hurt us...Would you?" i asked softly, he diverted his eyes to mine and i knew. Of course he would. Miss Butts has forced him. Harry's life is on the line. "I'm sorry Lily but this is my job. Your nothing but a means to a end"
"Harry, i know you. You don't mean that"
"Of course he does, hes just like the rest of them" Ashton said but my eyes were focused on Harry. I barely heard what Ashton had to stay. His harsh words were foreign to me. "he's a monster, he would hurt you the first chance he could get" Ashton whispered in my ear. His breath caused goosebumps. "Shut up Ashton" i whispered. Although i couldn't see him, i knew he rolled his eyes. In the distance we all heard Guards. They were closing in on us. My heart rate increased. Harry looked neutral. Alice whimpered in the corner. She put her hands over her ears."I refuse to go back to a small fucking cell. Lily, i would love to escape with you but if i have to i will leave you" Ashton warned, backing away from me.
"Please don't make me have to leave you" I suddenly missed the close distance once before. The guards got louder, the fear got thicker and the betrayal burned worse than before. "Please come with me" Ashton once again breathed in my ear. The flashlights could now be seen. This was the day i finally gave up on my only friend. I touched Harry's cheek ever so softly. The coldness strarterling him slightly. "Goodbye Harry Styles" I smiled. I sniffed before turning around. Ashton had a shocked expression. "Together?"
"Together" i clarified with a smirk. Suddenly Ashtons eyes went wide. A loud gasp fell from my lips. I looked down and a huge silver blade went through my stomach. It almost reached Ashton. I placed my hand at the wound and blood filled it. Alice came over to my aid as i fell to the ground. Ashton held my head before i harshly hit the floor. Everything was blurry but i saw Harry clear as day. Blood was on his hands also, Mine. "What did you do!" Ashton screamed. Alice removed her dress and placed it on the area making me cold, making me numb. The pain was excruciating. Maybe this was the ending i was hoping. I always wanted to die in a place , surrounded by loved ones but i guess this will do. "Please stay with me Lily" He begged. My eyes shut and everything went pitch black. I wished for a better life that night. A Australasian boy was on my mind all night.
Was this the end

Notes

I suck because i didn't correct the grammar and stuff :/
I listened to the dark horse & you and i mashup while writing this lol
If you haven't so can you vote comment subscribe please :)
and also i wrote another fanfic called teenagers
Its alot different to this but i have you guys like it :)
Its a Luke Hemmings story but it also features the other guys
as always thank you for voting :)