You Have Me

Harry didn't mean to spill his tea all over the front of his shirt. He didn't mean to trip Louis on his way out either. But once he heard Beth's voicemail and after the three seconds he needed to fully understand it, he didn't give two shits about what had happened on his way out. He knew he should have stayed home. He fucking knew it. But no. Beth had demanded he go to work and be normal. That he needed to stop hounding her for a tiny bit. She'd be fine she assured. She'd call straight away if anything were to happen.
Harry hadn't meant to leave his phone for so long. But the toilets were a mile away and his phone was in desperate need to be charged.

"So, you didn't answer the phone and I'm not mad, though I'm not very comfortable either. My water just broke and we're out of pop tarts and I think I'm going to cry, because they were the strawberry ones and you know those are my favorite, Harry. So when you get this, please take six or twenty deep breaths and calmly get to your over priced vehicle and drive to the nearest Tesco and pick up another box before rushing here and killing three people in the process. They have to be strawberry, baby. This is the one time I won't except anything else. Love you and try not to kill too many people. Your management people won't like that very much."

Harry wanted to laugh at his wife's calm message. He would have if she had been someone else's wife. But she wasn't. She was his and she was in labour asking for pop tarts?!

He managed to only piss two people off on his mad drive to reach her. He only slipped once and he managed to get unnoticed by the paps. He sprinted to their front door, punched the access code on the key pad, not bothering to shut it on his way to look for Beth.

"Baby-- fuck, okay. You're okay? Breathing like they taught us?"

"Mhm," Beth hummed smirking at her husband, hand resting over her bump. "Contractions aren't too bad yet," her face puckered in pain, ironically right after her sentence. She sat up carefully, gladly accepting Harry's hand, squeezing until it passed. "Never mind." She mumbled, with a small gush of air. "Where-- Harry, where are the pop tarts?"

"Beth, baby you're in labour--"

"Yeah, I know," Beth replied sarcastically, "the whole point of that voicemail was to make sure you didn't forget them."

"And here I thought it was because you were about to give birth," Harry says, kissing her quickly. "I'm going to get your hospital bag and you breathe." He demonstrated a few times before trusting his wife would do it by herself. He missed two or three steps on his way up, tripped by the hall and stubbed his finger with the door . He wasn't very graceful and right now he needed to be, if he wanted to find your bag.

But of course. Of-fucking-course it wasn't where he last remembered. He ran to the other side of the bed. Nope. He crouched down to look under. Nope. He checked the closet, the bathroom, the shower. Nope. Nope. Nope. He finally looked behind the door and almost slapped himself, because yes. He remembers leaving it there last night after packing away your son's onesie.

After a quick fist bump in the air he picked up the bag, and ran back down, trying his best not to die.

"Okay," he pants, looking over at his wife who is impressively calm texting away on her phone. "Baby you do know you're in labour right? It's not just me?"

Beth looked up from her screen, "I was wondering why my stomach hu--" before she could finish her sass another contraction hit. Harry ran towards her, placing a hand on her back and rubbing while breathing alongside her. "Fucking hurts."

"I know baby."

"Do you?" Beth asks once her breathing is normal and she doesn't feel like she's being stabbed, "do you really?"

Harry swallowed deeply, "why don't we get you to the hospital? You know where they have drugs that will make you less mean."

"I'd be less mean if you had gotten my pop tarts." She hisses.

"Can we please focus on you giving birth?!"

"Well," Beth says with narrowed eyes, "someone's in a mood." Beth grunts with annoyance.

"M'not in a mood," Harry tuts, trying to calm the situation down. He should have just picked up the fucking pop tarts. Maybe his wife wouldn't be giving him head trauma then. "Baby, we're about to have a child. How about when we get settled at the hospital I text Lou to bring some?"

There. Harry was going to be reasonable and try to make amends. He wasn't going to bring his son into the world with an angry mom.

"I can't go to the hospital without them," Beth cried with wide eyes. She shook her head and rubbed her swollen skin, "Harry please don't make me do that."

"Sweetheart you're in labor!" Harry didn't know how Beth was able to stay so calm. How she wasn't ready to follow over with fear. "I'm not stopping for pop tarts! I don't know how to deliver a baby! I'm not about to half-ass it with my own!"

"Harry," Beth whimpered. The same fucking whimper that went straight to Harry's heart and killed almost every rational thought he had. "Baby I want them." She juts out her bottom lip slightly as Harry sighed deeply.

"I know what you're doing," Harry accused already helping his errant wife out to their car. Once she was placed safely in the front seat, belt over her bump he leaned in, placed a frazzled kiss to the corner of her mouth and sighed, "can't I get you to the hospital first? That way the doctors are there?"

Beth shuddered in her seat as a burst of pain shot right through her body. They were getting closer and that scared her far too much for her liking. Harry stood next to her, letting Beth squeeze his hand until it turned purple.

"Breathe baby. Like they showed us--"

"You. Fucking. Breathe," Beth grits trying desperately not to rip Harry's head off. After a few minuets she heaved out a final breath and leaned back against her seat, "okay. Okay hospital first." Beth held in her cringe as she saw the cameras flashing and the number of people multiplying.

"Thank God," Harry says, relief flooding his system. Thank heavens he won't have to deliver his baby. He doesn't think that'll end well. He cursed under his breath at all the unwanted visitors. He jogged to his side and beeped trying to get through, without killing someone. "You need to move! My wife's in pain!" After three honks and Beth's persistence of just fucking it and going, he managed to get through.

"Fuck this hurts worse than they say," Beth mumbles with clenched teeth, "fucking liars."

"How far apart are they now?"

"Three minuets."

"They were just four minuets! Fuck, okay. Okay baby, don't panic. I'll get us there. Don't panic." Harry really should follow his own advice because he's positive he's about to faint or throw up at the very least.
"Don't panic." Harry urges once more.

"I'm not," Beth says, wiping her forehead. "God this is gross." Beth says crinkling her nose at the water on her fingers.

"Traffics picking up," Harry says overjoyed. He manages to move in front of three cars and only get honked once. "We'll be there soon love. Are you good? Want me to breathe with you? Cause I will, you know. M'here for you."

"Baby I do need one thing from you."

"Anything. You name it and it's yours."

"Please shut the fuck up," Beth utters as her breathing picks up again and pain shoots through her body. "I can't-- fuck, I don't want to do this anymore." Beth is close to tears and Harry can finally see the panic he had been expecting. "This hurts."

"We'll get you medicine baby. Anything to make you feel better."

"No," Beth says much too quickly. "No medicine. No epidural."

"Beth--"
"No Harry," Beth says again, "I did this to myself. I'm going to do this natural. No d-drugs. Nothing."

"We'll talk more when we've arrived, okay? Just breathe for me gorgeous. We're nearly there."

"I've texted Louis," Beth pants, trying to distract herself from crying, "he says he'll call momma S. And he'll bring my pop tarts and then call everyone else."

"Okay," Harry wants to hit himself for forgetting to call his mom. He's not the one giving birth. He really should get his shit together. "I can see the hospital. Get ready baby, you're about to become a Mumma."

"Yeah, remind me after I have a baby to show for it."

****
"Guess who?" Beth picks her head up and sighs.

"Louis," she hums tiredly, "oh my God, hi. I love you."

"Pain has made her delusional I see," Louis strolls inside, hugs Harry who looks incredibly focused, walks towards his best friend handing her a blue box. "For my Mumma to be."

"Oh," Beth gasps, clutching the box to her chest. She reaches up and wraps her free arm around Louis neck, "thank you." By now her voice is tired and her face is rosy. Beth is exhausted and persistent on the 'no drugs' rule.

"Want me to hold those baby," Harry moves to grab the box when Beth shakes her head.

"No," Harry frowns and looks at his wife who looks much too small. Her eyes are screaming in fear and he wishes he knew how to get her to open up about how she's feeling. "I'll hold them. Thanks."

"Hey," Louis coos. He knows this side of Beth. He remembers seeing it every time Beth wondered about her life and how she ended up with them, "don't you close up on us. S'okay to be afraid Beth. Harry's here and I'm here. And have we ever broken a promise or let anything bad happen to you?"

"No," Beth whimpers as she feels the stab against her stomach. It hurts. She knew it would. She just didn't imagine how much.

"What's got you so sad?" Harry leans in closer and tangles up their fingers together as Louis brushes her hair away from her face.

"M'not sad," Beth promises. She's about to meet her baby. She couldn't be anything but happy. She's just in pain and she's afraid. Completely terrified actually. "This is not what I expected. I thought I'd be motivated to be happy and giddy. But I'm tired. I'm so fucking tired and this hurts so much. This beds not comfortable and all I'm allowed to eat are ice chips and they taste like proper shit. I'm so tired. And I want to eat my pop tarts and I want to fucking enjoy pushing out my child and I can't because it hurts too much."

"Oh baby," Harry sat up and kissed the back of her hand, "it's okay to hate labor. Don't feel bad, darling. If you want to curse and be mean, then you go for it. You're having a baby and that alone deserves the world."

"Besides, I need a baby to spoil. El and I have boughten so much shit and we need a baby to give it too."

"If you turn my son into a brat I will personally cut your balls off."

"Don't be naughty in front of the baby," Louis gasped amused.

"I wish I was ab--" Beth cringed and breathed slowly as the pain started up again. Louis' smile fell and his hand reached for Beth's instinctively. His eyes bulged at the tightness from Beth's grip. "Fuck, those hurt."

"My hand hurts," Louis frowned as he examined his red hand. "You better buy Beth a fucking house sized diamond after this."

"Please shut up," Beth demanded. Voices frustrate her and she's already on edge from the pain and discomfort. Things were speeding up and it scared the life out of her.

"Alright gentleman," Nurse Cathy cheered as she waltzed in. She was a nice lady. In her fifties, always smelling like cookies, "if you are not the father, I need you to step outside real quick."

"Come on Harry," Louis jokes, grabbing Harry's arm.

"That's not funny butt munch," Beth groaned as the cursing pain attacked once more. They were getting closer and that only meant she was near the end and if she could run she would. But she won't, in fear that the baby might slip out.

"I'll just wait with everyone else. Love you," Louis sang as he walked out.

Beth hurt all over. The pressure was building and the contractions felt deadly. It was almost time and Beth wished she wasn't so stubborn and had just accepted the damn epidural.

"You're a funny bunch," nurse Cathy giggled. She walked to the end of the bed, a white glove on her hand. "Just gonna check how far along you are," her hand went under the blanket. She felt around for a few seconds when she looked up with excited pupils, "it's time sweet pea! Let me just go and get Dr.Hart and we'll begin pushing." She pulled her hand out, Beth's nose crinkling as she spotted red on the white gloves.

Harry squeezed Beth's hand as she breathed slowly through her nose, "finally," she sighed as a painful contraction hit. She tried breathing with Harry. She really did. But this one was a big one. It was filled with pressure and the need to push. "They better come quick. I don't think the baby will wait any longer."

"Let me see what's taking so long," Harry soothed. Beth was red in the face and Harry's heart sunk. He tried dangerously hard to get her to reconsider the 'no drugs' thing but she would not back down. She'd glare and threaten to kick him in the balls when she could walk if he didn't stop asking.

"Hurry or I'll have this baby without you too." Beth meant for it to sound like a joke. She thought her voice was light under these circumstances, but she realized she sounded harsh when Harry's face showed a worried expression. "I'll wait. You go." She finished quickly.

Harry nodded and dropped a kiss on Beth's wet forehead. He scurried outside, ignoring all the familiar faces in the waiting room. He passed security and breathed a sigh of pure relief when he spotted nurse Cathy and Dr. Hart speed walking. He half ran back, mumbling a quick hello and a brief hug for his mom before joining Beth again.

"They're coming," Harry winced as Beth whimpered and thrashed on the bed in discomfort. "It's almost over baby. Only minuets now. Breathe." He said for the hundredth time.

"I am," Beth snapped, "I have been for the last twenty-one years. I don't need you to start telling me when and how to do it." Harry let her crankiness roll over his shoulders. Beth was in pain. The kind of pain where even the ones who didn't cause it felt guilty. "Thank God." Beth shuddered as she spotted her doctor.

"Bethany, I hear we're ready to have a baby?" Dr. Hart smiled as Beth's eyes snapped open and her mouth parted.

Her head shook frantically, "no! Oh God no. Forget it, I've changed my mind. Let me keep him in there and--" she was cut off by another contraction. God, labor was messy and painful and right now she needs to remember not to push. "Another m-month Dr. H." Harry looked down as he finally saw his wife panic. He gives her props for holding it in for so long.

"Can't hunny. It's time to push," Dr. Hart said. He disinfected both hands and arms, as nurse Cathy helped him with the rubber gloves. "I'm impressed. No doula, or drugs. Such a strong girl," he sat on a stool and began to lift the bed sheet.

"I'm n-not ready!" Beth cried out, fighting every instinct to push, "Let me go home!"

"Baby," Harry crooned, stopping her from standing, "you're going to be okay. You can do this. You are doing this, love. Our baby can't stay inside of you anymore. He has to come out now."

"No," Beth whispered, "I have no idea how to be a mom. I'm not r-read-- fuck!"

Beth hadn't noticed Dr. Hart lift the sheet or nurse Cathy lift and spread her legs. She'd be embarrassed, but all her mind could think of was, push.

"It's time to push, Bethany," Dr. Hart warned sympathetically.

"You're going to be the best Mum baby, you can do this. I'm right here." Harry promised, holding her hand like he was a life line.

Beth didn't say anything. She nodded and turned her head to follow the doctors's instructions. "Okay, on three I'm going to need you to push as hard as you can okay? We'll count to ten and then take a break, and start again. Okay?"

Beth nodded as the pain and pressure was stronger than it had ever been. She needed to push, her instincts were screaming for her to do so.

"Three," Dr. Hart announced. Beth shut her eyes and sucked in a deep breath. She pushed hard and her muscles could feel the burn. "Ten," she heard and gasped in a shaky breath. "Just like that. Ready?"

Honestly, no. Beth did not want to do that again. But she had no choice.

"Three." She heard once more.

"You can do it sweetheart."

"Come on baby, push. Push."

Both Harry and nurse Cathy cheered. This was it. She could feel it. She sucked in a last breath, she held Harry's hand in a death grip, and pushed inhumanly hard. She pushed and pushed until a baby's cry filled her ears and her lungs began to burn.

She saw the head slide out, followed by a small body and then a rope like thing. "A boy! You have a boy," Dr. Hart said holding the tiny person by the neck gently and supporting the body, "okay, dad, would you like to cut the umbilical cord?" Harry walked over and grabbed the tongs. His hand shook as he cut all ties of the new baby and Beth.

Nurse Cathy was handed Beth's baby for a quick clean up and then wrapped him up like a small burrito and a small blue hat was placed on the baby's head. Beth had done it. She had actually pushed out a human being from her body and she didn't die while doing it. She was proud of herself. Proud and so fucking tired.

She was wrecked infact.

Her head turned as she heard Harry sniffle, "you did it. I knew you could." He said. He kissed her forehead and then her mouth. "I love you. I love you so much." And Beth wanted to say it back. She would have if she could find the words.

The placenta was easier to push out. It almost fell out and Beth was happy with that. No way would her body be able to handle that.

Finally nurse Cathy walked slowly and placed the small living creature on Beth's chest as his tiny body heaved up and down. "Do we have a name picked out?"

"Fin Alexander," Beth said, finally being able to speak. She felt different. She was in love with this tiny, unknown person. Her finger skimmed over the soft skin.

"That's lovely dear," nurse Cathy cheered.

"We'll give you both a minuet," Dr. Hart said, eyes examining the baby and then Beth's body. Once satisfied that they were both okay he congratulated the new parents and followed nurse Cathy out.

"Fin. I love it. Fin," Beth sighed, loving the way the name rolled off her tongue. Fin had been the only name both Harry and Beth had agreed on instantly. She remembers Harry crying and then singing to her belly after that.

Beth is twenty-one and for the second time she is completely and ridiculously in love with a boy. A tiny baby. Her tiny little person.

"He's ours," Beth says, rubbing Fin's back gently, "he's so small. He's-- he's ours."

"All ours," Harry promises, wiping his eyes, "you did incredible baby. He's perfect."

"He's my son. Of course he is." Beth kissed Fin's forehead and lazily made room for Harry to sit. "Let's meet daddy, Fin. You'll love him. He's cute and he loves to sing."

Harry chuckled and took his new baby in his arms. "You'll love Mumma too. She's gorgeous and she likes to hug." Harry wanted to burst right then. Fin was small. So small and he was theirs. Their baby. "Thank you," Harry whispered.

"For?" Beth wondered lazily.

"Everything. For staying. For choosing me. For giving me Fin. For loving me the way I love you."

"Always," Beth mumbles, reaching over to stroke her baby's cheek, "you have me always."

"Always." He promises with a kiss.
****
"Mum please don't cry," Harry almost begged as he saw his mom's eyes suspiciously wet. She's cried through all of Beth's pregnancy. When they announced they were expecting. When they revealed the first sonogram. When they announced it was a boy. She even cried when she was informed Beth was in labor. "I've already done all the crying."

"Can't help it," Anne musters, holding her grandson close to her chest, "he's just so perfect. You did so well, love."

"Thank you," Beth says proudly. Her face isn't tomato red anymore and thankfully she was allowed to wear a robe over the hideous gown. Her hair wasn't wet and stuck to her face with sweat anymore and she no longer felt the need to die. "He's the definition of perfection."

Her room was filled with flowers. An abundance of flowers and balloons and enough teddies to create an army. Everyone was around them and fawning over tiny Fin. Marveling at the concept of life.

"Who's the God father?" Anne asked.

Beth reached for Louis' hand. He immediately stood next to her as soon as he was allowed in her room. He kissed her cheek and held Fin in his arms as he shamelessly teared up.

"Louis," Beth says as he looks down. Louis was always her first choice. He had been her family and now he was Fin's uncle. Louis was her best friend and she loved him. She loved everyone in the room, but it had always been Beth and Louis. Louis and Beth.

"Niall's God-Mum," Harry joked. "He cried more than I did. S'only fair."

"Fatherhood has made you mean," Niall complained as Gemma shoved his shoulder.

"Honestly Haz you and Beth made such a cute baby. He must get it from her." Despite her words she pulled her brother in for a hug and whispered, "good job bubba."

Harry squeezed her gently, "thanks Gem."

Slowly Fin made his way around the room. Niall had cried and then promised to take him to every fast food place he wanted, because real love is shown through food. Liam and Zayn held the water works but both cooed and used their best baby voices already calling dibs on favorite uncle.

Louis took hold of his God son and snorted, "crazy people, Finny. Uncle Lou will be your favorite obviously. We'll give your Mumma and old man such head aches with all the trouble we'll get in. Then when they're too mad we'll get Aunt El to bail us out."

"Already scheming with my son," Harry rolled his eyes and took his son before he was a convicted criminal, "don't listen to uncle Lou. He's not very well."

"I resent that."

Harry shrugged and took a deep breath against Fin's baby belly, "I forgot how good babies smell." Harry knew what love was. He's married to the love of his life. But this new feeling was taking him by surprise. He loved Fin in ways he never thought possible. He wanted to put him in a bubble and never let anymore ruin his innocence. "Gonna love you more than anyone, Fin. Me and Mumma are going to make you so happy and you're going to have the best family." After a few kisses he passed a fussy baby Fin back to Beth as his heart warmed up with love and endearment.

"Mumma's going to give you more love than you'll know what to do with. Your aunts and uncles are going to teach you how to get into trouble and grandma is going to make you so many cookies."

"And then daddy will help you play it off." Harry says seriously, already hating the idea of the unhealthy choices out there. "I helped make him." Harry says amazed. He can't believe it. Can't believe that a few hours ago, Fin was in Beth's stomach. It's almost like magic.

Beth was the same. Though she felt it. Her eyes scanned the room and her chest felt heavy in the best possible way.

"Happy birthday Fin," Beth whispered. "Happy first of many birthdays Fin."

Notes

I tried to stop writing for this story and then I was left home alone for two hours and this happened and I'm not even sorry. I'm so not sorry and I have eaten nothing but cake for the last two days. My dad took me to Disneyland for the first time and I'm not sorry. Also I set my microwave on fire... But my mom's not mad anymore so I'm not sorry. This will be the last chapter... I hope... I don't know... Maybe.
~Celia (\^.^/)
P.S you're all the cutest spongecakes I've ever known.