3 Months Later

"You didn't have to do all this, Beth," Louis says, brushing the hair away from my face, as he takes in the unusually large garment bag hanging by the window. My room looks like a mess. A giant--wedding--mess. With my dress for tonight and tomorrow. Louis' suit for tomorrow. Hair products. Make up. Food. Flowers. Head pieces. Shoes for both genders. My packed suit case. Everything you may need for a wedding, I have it in here, because according to Anne it's important to have it and not need it,than need it and not have it. "Could've just gone to Vegas. Maybe even skipped that and just started the honeymoon early." Louis shrugs and he's not really helping my nerves as he walks over and examines my outfit for tonight's dinner.

"I wish," I muttered.

It hadn't been that I was against doing this. The whole traditional nuptials, the white dress, the attention. It had been that I didn't need it. Didn't need a whole ceremony to commit myself to Harry. Didn't need a decorated ballroom with hundreds of people to witness it. All I needed was Harry; and I would have voiced my opinion if I hadn't seen the way Harry's eyes glimmered with excitement or the way his mom had teared up at the mere thought of me wearing a white dress.

"I'm doing this for Bae and Bae's mom."

Louis cringes, "if you don't stop using the word 'bae' I'm going to throw up all over your shoes."

"Why can't you let me be myself," Louis grinned and chuckled. "Look, I would've been more than happy to elope. Fuck, I would've performed the ceremony myself. But then I saw how excited Harry got talking about planning a wedding and then Anne cried Louis, she cried when El--and remind me to kill your girlfriend--began showing us wedding dresses--that are in my opinion too much dress." I breathed out, hoping to steady my erratic heart. And it didn't. It really didn't. "I was going to say something after the first month--but then we got to the second--and then the third....and well...I fucked myself over Lou."

I really did fuck myself.

On so many stupid levels.

Louis snickered and sighed, "sweetheart it's your day too," and I now it is but a marriage is about comprise....or so I've heard. "There's still time to call it all off and elope."

"No there's not. It's tomorrow!" I cried. Louis smirked and I forget Louis an ass sometimes.

"Well you should've spoken up when you had the chance. You did have three months."

"You want to die don't you."

"You can't even punish Mushu when he craps on the carpet and you think you can kill me?"

"Difference being Mushu's cute. You look like a butt."

"Beth," Louis sighs, "do you really want to get married with a shaved head? Cause I'll do it. I swear I will."

"Oh my god Louis I'm about to have a panic attack and you're cracking jokes!" Louis laughs, head titled and hand on his stomach. He composes himself and grabs my hand. He leads us to the bed and tugs me until I'm sitting in front of him.

Sitting like this, feeling like this; feels like old times, and I don't know if that's a good thing or a really depressing thing.

"Why are you panicking? A bit late don't you think? Weddings tomorrow babe." The wedding being tomorrow is why I'm panicking. And everything seems to be happening so fast. It feels like it was yesterday when he proposed not three months ago. It feels...oh god it feels like it's blazing right past my eyes. "Oh fuck," Louis mutters when he notices my wide eyes. He tangles our fingers together, his eyes softening. "Oh, Beth you really are afriad?"

My throat tightens and my vision blurs.

It feels awful to feel this way, but I can't help it. It only gets worse when I realize the rehearsal dinner is forty-five minuets away.

Okay.

Okay, I can do this.

I can try to do this.

"Do you not want to get married tomorrow? Is that it?" It's not that. I think to myself. It's more like my parents failed marriage is flashing through my mind, and the way they made each other miserable is bringing back so many memories. Memories I wish the amnesia would have taken away. "Beth if you're planning to run don't tell me. Like, don't tell me any details, don't give me any specifications. Just tell me where to meet you so I can grab Eleanor and we can bounce."

I know I'm at a crisis right now, but that was probably the cutest thing Louis has ever said to me. Even if it's under this circumstance.

"Louis Tomlinson you are truly my soul mate."

"Shit, you're in love with me?! Oh my god--I mean I don't blame you--but Harry and Elean-"

"What? No! Louis I'm not in love with you," I half shout. He's a great man but, no. Oh god, no. "No I'm not planning on running away either."

"Then why are you being a drama queen?"

"Because what if we're my parents, Louis! What if we're just like them!? Then what? We're fucked! Completely and totally fucked!" It honestly just came out. I didn't mean to reveal so much. I almost never do, except Louis does this thing where he pushes and pushes until I reveal all my secrets. It's both a blessing a curse.

Almost always being a curse though.

"You are nothing like your parents! Not even close," by now Louis voice is gentle. Like I'm a crying child, and honestly I feel small right now. "Beth you shouldn't ever compare yourself to such horrendous people. S'not right." I was raised with those people. We're bound to have similarities. It's the the reason why I'm so sure we'll end up like my parents. It's terrifying. "Is that why you wanted to elope? Because your parents had the big wedding?"

I've been discovered.

"I just think it'd be safer to start off differently."

"Beth you're my best friend," I'm waiting for the but. There's always one. "But you're a down right idiot. You're cute, but you're an idiot." And there it is.

"I'm offended." I mumble. This is why I never share my secrets.

"Beth if that's your only reason for panicking, you're an idiot."

"Lou-"

"Beth," he cuts me off with a serious face. "Beth I know you like I know the back of my hand. You're stressed and this is a big change. I know it is. But I also know you and Harry love each other too much to live without one another." Louis' eyes are soft. His hand squeezing mine. It's nice. Louis is nice. "You're going to be fine, I promise. And have I ever broken my promises with you?"

"No," I sigh.

"No," he agrees easily. "You look incredible and we're going to be late and as your father and man of honor for the day, I'm going to need you to hurry the fuck up."

"Promise you won't let us get bad again. Promise me Lou."

"Never again. I promise." Louis stands and helps me. He hugs me to his chest and let's out a shaky breath. "If this is us today, imagine tomorrow when you're actually getting married."

"Shut up." I mumble, face pressed against his shoulder.

"Where's Harry? Shouldn't you two be arriving together?"

"He'll be here in ten minuets Lou. Said he had to pick something up," I shrug. Louis' mouth forms into a small circle as he fixes his button down.

"Go change in the bathroom. Come on, go." Louis hands me the garment bag and shoos me away. He closes the door when I'm in. In a odd way, I almost feel like louis standing guard at the door as a way to stop me from actually running.

I feel like in idiot. A big idiot who doesn't know how to speak up, because I could have said something. Should have said something when we were choosing venues. Or when we went dress shopping. Fuck, I could have pulled Harry aside when we were choosing flowers, or during the cake tasting. I had all the time in the world and I didn't take it, because I'm an idiot, who gets stupid when it comes to the man she loves.

Even now as I'm putting on my dress (which in my opinion is absolutely perfect, because it's almost too pretty to be worn by me) I can still feel myself shaking. I'm not sure if it's more from anger or nerves.
Might be both.

As the door creaks open I swear my lungs stopped working. And because I'm a freak I look down only to have my head snap up, when I hear a low gasp.

"Baby," Harry breathed walking forward, his eyes already suspiciously wet. And I'm confused, because when did Harry get here? And where is Louis? "Oh, Beth look at you. You're, fuck. You're beautiful."

"Harry I swear if you start crying, I'm going to start crying and then I'll look the opposite of beautiful." I warn only causing Harry to laugh, heartedly. "I'll punch you if you make me cry."

"Kiss me instead," he replies, His lips puckered and close.

Kissing Harry is like happiness. It's full of smiles and excitement. I love kissing Harry.

"You two are gross. Stop being gross," Louis whines with a lazy smile. "That dress Beth. That dress is all kinds of flawless."

The only thing I can manage is a small smile, that seems to bother Harry as he wraps his fingers around my wrist and gives me a look. A look, I'm not sure I like all that much.

"Louis," Harry asks in his gentle voice. "Can you give us a minuet?"

My heart drops into my stomach and does a couple flips. Fuck Harry's ability to read my mind.
Louis stays silent and shrugs as he's walking out of the room.

"Beth," Harry says slow and calm.

"Harry."

"Beth if you don't want to marry me, tell me now." My face frowns and my head spins.

"W-what?" It's all so confusing at this point. Sometimes Harry's mood swings are completely strange."Why would you say that?"

"Because you have this look in your eyes Beth," he says sadly, gaze down. "I know you Beth. Know when you're not happy."

I'm terrible.

Because having Harry look this sad, should be a crime.

"Harry," it wasn't my intention to look miserable. I didn't think I did. I guess I was wrong. "Harry, I am happy. Everyone gets nervous the day before their wedding. Doesn't mean I don't want to marry you."

"You're not nervous though. You seem worried, and upset." And when it comes to Harry I forget I'm an open book that he's read a million times. "You don't want to marry me?" Harry's voice is timid in a way that I hate.

"Oh, Harry," I sigh, "I said yes. Of course I want to marry you. If I look upset or worried, it's because I'm fucking weird." I don't know how to explain it all to him. How to tell him that I'm afraid, that we might be like my parents.

"Beth you're going to be my wife," the word wife right now has the power to make me throw up everything I've eaten this last month. "Can you tell me what's making you 'so fucking weird' maybe I can help?"
I don't think therapy will even help.

"Did we really need such a big wedding?" I ask. My voice is hesitant, even to my own ears. "Harry I don't have any family, and I don't remember yours."

"Beth where is this coming from?"

"I've been thinking about this for a while now," three months to be exact. "Harry my parents started out this way."

Harry's confused. I can tell by the furrow in his eyebrow and the way his lips are frowning. "What way?"
"The big wedding. Being ridiculously attached to each other. They were just like us Harry. And look at them." It's ridiculous because my parents aren't even here and it still feels like they're ruining everything.

"I don't want us to make each other miserable. I don't want to be the reason why you hate life or your child."

I'm utterly ridiculous, that it's almost embarrassing.

"You've never made me miserable, Beth." Harry says firm. "Never even made me angry." His hand cups my cheek and his thumb rubs against my skin. "Beth I love you. I love you in a way I thought I'd only be able to love my family. You, God Beth, you're it. It's you or no one else. The only way you could ever make me miserable is if you left me."

"I'm going to punch you," I whimper as I swipe under my eyes. "I'm going to hit you for making me cry."

Harry chuckles, "we're not even married yet, and I'm already on a roll."

"Shut up." I groan.

"Are you really upset about the size of our wedding?" The serious tone in his voice is back. "Because I can fix it, and I can have us in Vegas in a few hours."

"No it's okay," I know Harry wants me happy, but I know this is his dream wedding and if I can make it happen just by agreeing to it, then I'm fucking going to. Even if it means having to hang out with strangers and people I can't remember. "Your mom would be terribly disappointed if we eloped."

"My mum isn't the one getting married tomorrow. You are."

"So are you," I lift my hand and place it on his hair. "We're going to miss our dinner if you keep fussing."

"Are you sure?"

"I'll marry Niall if you don't stop. He's already got a suit."

Harry laughs with his head tilted back. "You wouldn't."

"I would. Niall's cute." Especially with his fake blonde hair and lazy smile.

"Baby stoppppp," Harry whines, entwining our fingers as he leads us out of the room. "You're my missus."

"Tomorrow I will be." I promise. "Officially atleast."

That's if I can get through the rehearsal dinner without panicking again.

Notes

Happy Thanksgiving my friends! You're all so lovely and cute and omg I wish we could hug and drink chai tea together!
We've got two chapters and a few Extras left!
I love you all (\^.^/)