"Nothing personal Beth," Lucas says with wild eyes. He licks the top line of his bottom lip while shrugging his shoulders down for good measure. It's like he wants to show me how this isn't a big deal. That nothing catastrophic has just happened. "Got an opportunity. Took advantage of said opportunity. And now I'm the big man on campus."

He shrugs once more. It's infuriating. Like all those times where you know you're wrong but you refuse to back down because your pride won't allow it.

"You're a twitt-fuck!" My voice is louder by instinct. It's not on purpose and I hate the fact that I must look like a teenage drama queen. "You think you're all high and mighty after this fucking little scheme?"

He's got a conniving little smirk painted on his lips. He nods once and pulls his phone out. His finger scrolling on the screen. "We can't all be winners." He says with no interest.

My mouth parts in shock. This guy is a fucking joke. He's the kind of guy your father begs you not to talk to. And if my father had cared about me and my well being I most likely wouldn't be in this situation.

When it became obvious that he won't look up, I snatch his phone from his hand, finger mid-swipe. He looks up with wide eyes and mouth parted in a circle. I throw the phone against the nearest tree trunk, extremely proud when a painful crunch is heard. Lucas looks at his broken phone on the ground. His mouth still open and both arms dangling by his sides.

"The fuck did you do that for you crazy bitch?!"

"We can't all be winners." I mimic his answer from before, watching as his face becomes the pure definition of fury.

"You're going to pay for tha-"

"You're a fucking joke," I hiss. I'm expecting for Lucas to react, to say something. But he doesn't instead he smiles. The same psychotic smile from before. It has my stomach twisting in weird loops. "You can't ruin my life and pretend it doesn't matter! I trusted you! How could you send those pictures out!? You were my first time Lucas!" I breathe out, willing myself not to cry. Because if I do then that means he'll win. I won't let him win. "How can you do something like that and still think you're worth an ounce of respect?"

"Oh Beth," he tsks, he stares at me with no warmth. Like I'm a waste of his time. It's awful and I just want to hide. "I did what I had to do. You were just a pretty face with a nice body," he raked his fingers through his hair. Swooping his fringe to the side. "Look at it like this, now everyone knows your name to."

Lucas pats my shoulder. He turns and walks away, stopping mid way. His head turns and he grins back at me. "Thanks for the fun night." He winks and saunters away.

I want to throw up. I want to scream and I want to beat Lucas until he unrecognizable. I want someone to stand up for me. But no one will. To them I'm a whore. They don't realize that I'm just a kid who was lied to.

****
"Beth?" Lucas' hand is waving in front of my face.

These two years haven't really changed him. His face is more defined and he's gotten bigger. His eyes are the same though. They were the reason I became so stupidly gullible. Big hazel eyes that sparkled with mischief and some unknown emotion I was never able to make out.

I can feel Louis arm wrap around me. It squeezes me and it makes me ecstatic, to know that for once I'm not alone. That someone would defend me if I needed it.

"Is she okay?" Lucas asks warily.

Louis doesn't respond. Instead he turns me slightly and studies my face. My eyes giving something away, because I'm suddenly behind him, as his body becomes almost like a shield. It reminds me of a child being protected from a monster. The only difference now was that I wasn't a child.

Though I feel like it more times than not.

Our drinks are called out and Louis grabs my hand from behind. "Don't strain yourself mate." Louis taunts before walking us away from this demon. He picks up our beverages and leads us outside.

He turns and faces me with a knowing look. "Tell me everything." He orders simply. I know there is no room for me to deny. I can't just tell him it's nothing and then change the subject. That's not how it works with Louis. Because Louis knows me too well.

"He's just an idiot from my past Lou. He did a shitty thing and I haven't seen him since....I don't know."

"Bet-"

"Louis please," I really don't want to do this right now. I'm freezing and Lucas is inside. Much too close, for my liking. "I'll tell you another time. I promise. I just don't want to right now."

"Fine," Louis sighs, not pleased with my answer. "I expect nothing less. But if you tell Harry before me, there will be some severe problems."

"There's always problems." I shrug. Louis swings his arm around my shoulders as the four security guards move back in place.

"The price of life." Louis rambles. He drops a kiss on my head and sighs.

I think it's too high a cost.

****
"You never told me how your conversation with Harry went," Louis grabs our tub of ice cream and scoops out a portion too big for his mouth. I said we should serve ourselves in bowls. But Louis just laughed at me and grabbed two spoons instead. "Is he excited you're having a little man?"

"He says he's flying out here," Louis mouth opens in a surprised circle. With Lucas and going out I had forgotten Harry had said he was flying out. It's a bit surprising because if something has to do with Harry, I make sure to remember it all. Well everything that's happened in the last few months.....the past doesn't count. "That's the exact look I made when he told me."

"He's flying out? When?"

"Well we talked yesterday and it takes...what?....a day to get here?"

Louis shrugs with his head tilted. He looks like he's thinking out the time between my call and now.

"Sounds about right. How do you feel? Are you okay with him coming here?"

"I don't know," I sigh. I really don't. I mean I miss him. Like I miss him an unhealthy amount. But I know it's too early. It's only been a week and a half. "If he was actually serious, it's not like I'll have a choice. I doubt I'll be strong enough to send him back....I don't k-"

"You don't know if you'd want to right?" Louis really does know me. Like he gets me. It's nice and I wish everyone would have a friend like this.

"It's creepy how you can read my thoughts."

Louis laughs and pummels his over full spoon into his mouth. I roll my eyes and my heart skips a beat when there is a knock on the door.

I look at Louis and he motions with his hand for me to answer. And I know what he's doing. He's giving me his secret push because he knows I'd chicken out and leave the door unanswered if I were alone. Louis moans around his spoon and waves his hand shooing me towards the door.

Well okay. It looks like I'm answering the door. Okay.

I take a deep breath and close my eyes. Like most of my life, I don't have a choice. I know I need to open the door because otherwise Louis will do it and then he'll do something ten times worse. My hand twist the knob and instead of meeting Harry's usually kind eyes, I'm met with Hazel mischievous ones.

"How did you know I was staying here?"

"Beth? Who is it?" Louis calls out. His ice cream probably already being digested.

"Can I come in? I just want to talk."

His request is stupid. To put it in simple terms, it's stupid. Like a whole new level of stupid. Like I'd let him in after what he did. No. No fucking way.

"I um. I-I guess?"

Well fuck me.

He shuffles inside as Louis makes his way over to us, eyeing Lucas with hard eyes.

"What are you doing here?" Louis says with a cold tone. He stands next to me, always giving me small touches as if he's trying to remind me that he's there. It's all so nice and touching.

"I came to talk with Beth," he shuffles his weight on both legs. He rubs the back of his neck in a nervous matter. "I need to apologize and explain why I did what I did."

"And what exactly did you do?" Louis asks with a raised brow. He looks back at me and then give Lucas his attention.

"He doesn't know?" Lucas asks incredulously.

I shook my head. "S'not my proudest memory. It's humiliating actually." Lucas head drops and I don't know if he's being sincere because I've come to realize that people rarely are.

"Im so sorr-"

"Sure you are," I cut him off. I don't need his simple apology. I'm not even sure he means it. I turn to Louis. "Lou can you excuse us for a minuet?" Louis eyes widen and he looks at me, a mix of surprise and hurt. I really don't mean to make him feel like this. But I'd rather be the one who tells him my mortifying secret. "Just for a few minuets, Lou. I promise."

"I don't like this Beth." Louis mumbles before letting out a sigh and walking out. Once the door shuts I turn and look back at Lucas.

"Listen I've been through hell and back and I don't need your fucking crap right now, okay? So whatever bullshit excuse you have, you can shove it right up your ass. You pretentious bastard."

"Beth I Swear I'm only here to apologize and to try and make things oka-"

"Okay? You really think things could be okay between us? Fuck you're a bigger idiot than I thought."
Lucas moves in closer and grips both of my biceps. He stares intently at me.

"Just hear me out. Five minuets Beth. Please." He begs desperately. It's a nice change. How the roles have reversed.

"No, I'll never get those five minuets back! No, fuck you!" Lucas let's out a shaky breath but his grip doesn't tighten.

I'm not frightened. I'm annoyed that he's so close.

"You're still so stubborn," Lucas mutters. Damn right I'm still fucking stubborn. "I know I don't deserve it. But I'm asking anyways. Please Beth, please five min-"

"You don't deserve to even breathe around me."

"Bet-"

"No. Shut up and go away."

He really should quit while he's ahead.

"Bet-"

"No. No. No. Nooooo-" messy lips are pressed against mine. It's weird and surprising. And I know this is how he used to shut me up, but right now it's not appropriate and it's incredibly unwanted. He deserves to have his ass handed to hi-

"Beth?"

Oh fuck. Please no. No.

"Harry."

This looks incredibly bad. And I'm fucked on so many levels.

We can't all be winners, and I'm just a fucking loser.

Notes

Someone bought me birthday cake icecream!