You Have Me

"You're an idiot," that's the only rational explanation as to why Harry wants to do this. Why he's even asking. "Marriage isn't a joke, and it shouldn't be used as some last attempt, to get me to stay."

Harry licks his lips and shakes his head. "We both know it'll happen one day. So why not sooner than later?"

"Because it's stupid. And you're being an idiot for asking."

"Beth-"

"No. Shut up Harry," I move away from him and catch my breath. How the fuck did he expect this to go? Who the fuck asks something like this after what's happened? "No. I'm not marrying you. No I'm not staying. No, no, no."

"Beth if you don't want to get married, fine. But don't leave." Harry walks nimbly over to me, his eyes slightly puffy and his hair disheveled. He's a mess and I'm fighting incredibly hard not to nuzzle into him. "I don't want you to leave. I don't want either of you to leave." Once again his hand is over my small bump.

But it's good, because it's reminding me, of why I have to leave right now.

My little person isn't going to grow inside of me like this.

"Well that's not up to you anymore." I back up, and I'm almost ready to run. I don't need Harry to try and keep me hostage, and I don't need anyone making decisions for me anymore. Because people are mean and they're liars.

People suck in general.

"Beth, pleas-"'

"I don't know when, but I'll see you.....I don't know....when everything's not so fucked..."

I turn and run around the corner before Liam's voice stops me. "Beth? Where are you going?"
"I'm leaving for a while," I look up and sigh when Liam and Zayn look up sadly. "Don't give me those faces, come here." I hold my arms open trying my hardest not to cry when Liam and Zayn wrap me up close.

"Where will you go?" Zayn asks, voice muffled by my hair.

I shrug underneath him, because I didn't think this whole plan through. "Home? I haven't even called my father's lawyer yet." And it's not because I'm putting it off.

No, of course not.

"Then come stay in my room. We won't tell Harry you're here."

"Liam I can't do that. Harry will find out somehow and then it'll all get crazier," Liam huffed and shook his head. Zayn kept quiet, looking at me with a steady gaze. "I'll see you both soon, okay?"

As I was turning away, Zayn's hand wrapped around my wrist preventing my actual escape. I turned around confused. Please don't let them manipulate me. I don't want to feel like I'm stumbling any more.

"Where are you staying tonight?" Zayn asked.

Another part of my plan that I didn't think through.

I shrugged, hoping that my mind would come up with a quick lie.

"You've got no idea, do you?" Liam accused. And right now they shouldn't be trying to outsmart me.

"I'll think of something."

"Just stay with us. A few days. That's it." Zayn tutted.

Do I ever have a choice?

No of course not.

I'm me.

Liam's forehead wrinkled as he anticipated my answer. In someways they were right. I had no idea of what I should do. Where do I go? I don't have any money and now that we're being honest, I'm kind of hungry.

So I sighed, letting my shoulders droop. "A few days? And I can eat whatever food you have?"
Liam tilted his head, with a sly smirk. Zayn chuckled happily.

"Alright Mills. You get first dibs on all food." He grabbed my hand leading me back to his room. And I'm laughing at myself, because honestly I'm an idiot. I mean, I was running away with no luggage.
Once we were back in his room, everything became serious again.

The expressions strong and considering. Eyes alert and lips formed into a tight line.

"What's going to happen with you and Harry? What about the baby?" Liam asked, finally breaking the silence.

"I don't know," I murmured. "He wants to get married. Like it means nothing,"

"I'm su-"

"Who does that?" I asked looking at Liam, waiting for some kind of revelation. "Worst of all, is that this little person," I cupped my bump and looked down "they're going to come into this stupid world, surrounded by all of this shit. Harry kissing Lilly, me upsetting Louis in unforgivable ways. My father dying. It's all fucking shit." I read off my track list. Zayn remained silent and Liam just looked at me with a sorrow expression.

"Bet-"

"Liam, please," I stopped him before he could give me some sort of pointless uplifting quote. "I don't know what's going to happen, okay? I just know that I have to find a way to make it. I don't have a choice."

"You're going to be a brilliant Mum." Zayn says proudly. And it's so nice that it makes me want to cry.

"Really? Because so far I've been nothing but rubbish."

"No, you've been a gem under shit circumstances."

Zayn peers up at me and gently pushes my hair away from my face. "So what happens now?"

I shit my weight and tilt my head to the side. "Right now I have to call my father's lawyer. And then," I twiddle my thumbs, looking down. "Then I leave for a while."

Zayn grimace and Liam runs a hand through his hair. "Harry's going to go mental."

"You'll take care of him for me? Until everything gets better?"

Zayn bobs his head, "until everything gets better." He copies. And I'm praying they won't start crying, because lord knows if they do I'll loose it.

"And if the baby comes before things get better?" Liam asks gaze on my stomach.

My chest tightens and my heart clenches. I'm praying that isn't the case, but if it is....

"I become a single mom."

Notes

It's crunch time.