Kaitlyn's POV

I leave the cafe quietly, listening to the faint bell ring and throwing my satchel over my shoulder as I walk down the sidewalk quietly and pop my ear buds in. The music blares in my ears as I kick dirt up from the ground and click the cross walk button, standing beside the light pole and waiting silently as cars drift by in front of me.

I sigh heavily, watching as the sign across the street counts down from three and a green light flicks on, signaling for me to walk across. I prop myself up from my slouched position, walking across the street and stepping onto the paved sidewalk.

I walk into one of the older thrift stores, raveling my ear buds up around my phone and sticking my phone back inside of my satchel. I slide the tips of my fingers over the granite counter lightly, looking around at the decorations quietly and smiling softly as I pick up a glass dolphin. I flip it over, running my fingers over the delicate glass and placing it back on the shelf.
"This would go great in the living room." I murmur to myself, walking back to the door and picking up a small, green basket from the small shelf.

I walk back into the decoration aisle, putting the dolphin in the basket gently and walking slowly up and down the aisles. I hum softly, biting my cheek.

I find myself humming Niall's favorite song, the one he always forced me to listen to when I was in the car with him. I had pretty much come to love the song, always singing it when I was alone. But I hadn't heard the song in ages, and I wondered to myself why I was humming it.
I look down the aisle, looking at old clocks and seeing one that stood out from the rest of the other clocks that surrounded it.

I look at the clock, shaking my head and walking to the next aisle of the store. Niall had one exactly like that in high school, it sat just above his fire place in his living room. I remember us resetting it all the time because his brother would always change the time and his parents would blame him for it. They never found out that Greg was doing it, but Niall and I both knew it was him. But obviously, no matter how hard we tried telling them, they wouldn't believe us.
He would lift me up and over onto his shoulders gently and I would fix the clock slowly, setting it back to the right time while giggling uncontrollably as he tickled my feet.
I was always at his house on most days.

Niall's POV

I sigh sadly, sitting up from the bed and looking around the bedroom quietly. She was gone from the house, leaving absolutely no sign of her presence behind as my heart sunk into my stomach and I cringe.

I get up slowly from the seemingly freezing col bed, darkness sinking into me once again as I walked slowly down the stairs. I walk into the garage, grabbing a broom and walking silently to the kitchen. I sweep up all the shattered beer bottles, throwing away the garbage and sighing heavily.

In some ways, I found the old, broken bottles to represent my heart. They had been used for the good stuff they contained on the inside, them thrown away and broken for another bottle that held an even more satisfying taste inside.

She left me for Jack again, although I knew that it was bound to happen. If I hadn't of ran into her in Starbucks, none of this would've happened. I would still be depressed as I was before, but I think seeing her and knowing her feelings were no longer there opened my eyes.
He was the new bottle.

She was gone and she surely wasn't coming back anytime soon, and it was a fact I was uncomfortable facing at the moment. It nipped and chewed at my stomach but I eventually accepted the fact that it was true and it would never happen.
That she was in love with him and that's that.
Kaitlyn's POV

I unlock the door to my house, walking inside quietly and shedding of my heavy jacket and satchel. I hang my bag on the rack, kicking my shoes off by the door and walking upstairs to the shower. I turn on the faucet to hot, stripping my clothes and throwing them in the clothes hamper and getting in. I let the water run down my back, sighing heavily and closing my eyes. I turn around, wetting my face and grabbing the face wash from the rack and squirting it in my hands. I lather it, rubbing it all over my face and rinsing it away with the hot water.

I grab my blue and pink loofah off of the hook, putting it under the water and wetting it. I grab my body wash, squirting on the wash and scrubbing down my body gently.

I rinse off my body, letting myself stand under the piping hot water before turning the water off and grabbing a towel from the rack, wrapping it around my torso and walking out to the room.
I open the top drawer of my dresser, pulling out my undergarments and pulling them on. I dig through my bottom drawer, slipping on a pair of laced white shorts and an old muscle tank top.
I pull my hair into a high messy bun, slipping on my fluffy slippers and heading down the stairs quietly as I fling the fridge door open.

I pull out a left over pizza box, picking up a large slice and putting it on a glass plate. I put the plate in the microwave and setting it to four minutes, sitting up on the counter and sighing softly.

-flashback-

Freshman year of college

Niall's POV

I open my dorm room, throwing the heavy box on the floor by the bed and looking around. The room was slightly smaller than what I had been expecting, but there was a Queen sized bed and two bunks.

"Dibs on top bunk." a rough voice says behind me.

"I'm Sean." He says, extending a hand to me as I shake it with mine.

"I'm Niall." I shrug.

"New here, huh?" He laughs softly, setting his stuff on the bunk bed.

I shrug, unpacking my box and hanging up a Derby poster beside my bed and putting a picture frame on my night stand.

"Is that your girlfriend?" He asks, wiggling his eyebrows.

"No." I say sadly, shaking my head. "Ex girlfriend." I mumble, looking at him and putting up a dart board in front of my bed.

"I'm going to a sick dorm party tonight, feel free to come." Sean says, walking out of the room and closing the door.

I lay down on my back, grabbing darts from the box and shooting them at it. My mind wandered away as my wrist snapped and aimed at the wall.

"Shit." I say, standing up and pulling it from the wall.

I sigh heavily, shaking my head and putting the darts away. I look around the room, running my hand through my hair and closing my eyes. It was a game I more enjoyed while playing it with Kaitlyn in my old room, my old life.

I felt like an overly attached ex and that I was obsessed by putting up a picture of me and Kaitlyn on the night stand. But I did it anyways, because I missed her. It's been almost four months and I haven't seen her, knowing that she was far gone and all the way in Ireland.

I open my eyes slowly, looking towards the night stand and looking at the picture quietly and setting it face down. It was better off if I couldn't see her face, because then I wouldn't feel this way.

Niall stop.

I grab my phone, opening the door and checking the time as I see people heading towards a dorm down the hall. I furrow my eyebrows, watching them quietly.

Must be the "sick dorm party" that Sean had been talking about.

I shrug my shoulders, shutting my dorm door and following the people to the dorm. What was a little party gonna do to me?

I walk down the hall, walking in after all the people and coughing lightly.

The music pounded in my ears, shaking the floor rapidly as smoke clouded the air. The smell of alcohol burned my nose terribly, the sound of moans and groans erupting from sexually dancing couples on the dance floor.

If you walked in the kitchen you'd see men drinking shots off of a girls stomach, licking her clean as she drunk vodka from the bottle.

It churned my stomach as to how people could act like an animal, eating and drinking off of one another like it was normal behavior.

I felt someone tap my shoulder, turning around to face them to see a bright, slightly drunken smile, looking at me.

"You made it!" He slurs faintly, smiling widely as girls wink at him as they walk by.

"I've never been to a party before!" I tell him, looking around.


"Don't worry, I'll find someone you can have sex with." He says, drinking the bottle of beer in his hand.

I shake my head, looking at him like he was crazy.

"I'm not looking to have sex with someone." I say, sighing. "I don't even know why I'm here." I say.
I sigh heavily, looking around the dorm quietly and looking towards the bar.

"Let me get you a drink, man." Sean speaks up, thumping my shoulder and taking me to the bar.

"Strongest drunk you've got. Oh, and add a worm." He says to the bar tender as I sit down on.
I take the drink from the bar tenders hand, drinking it down quickly and groaning.

I hadn't drunken in years, so my alcohol tolerance was pretty close to no. But I drunk it anyways.

The alcohol burned my throat all the way down, eyes slamming shut as I order a shot.

"You sure? You look pretty distressed." He says, sliding me a shot.

I took the shot, gulping it down and gripping my knee with my hand.

What was I doing? Why was I even here? Did I think that it would help with the pain I was feeling?

It wasn't working, that was a fact. My heart still hurt in my chest, and my stomach still aches for her company. The only difference there was is that my heart was racing and my head was pounding from the horrible music.

Music blared loudly from the DJ's booth as I stood from the stool, rubbing my temples with my fingers. I heard a series of "wanna dance"'s and multiple girls pressing themselves to me. I shoved them all off, winding myself through the heavy crowd and stopping at the door.

"C'mon baby." someone says, pulling me to the dance floor and grinding on me.
I close my eyes, holding her hips loosely and sighing heavily to myself.

"C'mon, have some fun!" she whines, rubbing her bum against my crotch roughly, a deep moan erupting from the back of my throat.

She digs her nails in my forearms, turning in my hold and turning around to me.
"Take me to your place." she purrs seductively in my ear as I open my eyes and pick her up from the floor and carry her to my dorm room.

I connect my lips to her bare shoulder, sucking on the sensitive skin lightly and leaving a faint love bite. She whimpers softly, closing her eyes.

"C'mon, have more force." she whines, gripping the fabric of my shirt as I pop the door open and step inside, shutting it with my foot and laying her down on the bed. I kiss up her neck softly, showering soft kisses over her sweet spot and kicking my shoes off of my feet as they fall to the floor with a thud.

A soft moan comes from her parted lips, shoes being kicked from her feet as she scoots up further onto the bed and tugs roughly on her dress.

"Slow down, baby." I hum in her ear, running my hands up the inside of her dress as she shivers lightly.

-

She picks her clothes up from the floor, sliding her dress back on as I climb out of the bed and walk to the bathroom. The door slams closed in the other room, leaving me by myself again. I look in the mirror silently, looking over my tired face and running a hand through my knotted hair.
I lean my arms against the counter, sighing heavily and closing my eyes.

What was I even doing?

I grab my toothbrush from the holder, turning the faucet on and running the bristles under the cold water. I dig through the drawer, grabbing my toothpaste and squirting some onto the brush and sticking it in my mouth.

I hated myself.

Kaitlyn's POV

I lay on the hotel bed quietly, staring blankly at the ceiling, counting the tiles quietly to myself.

"Babe?" Jack speaks up, setting a McDonald's bag on the desk beside the bed.

I snap my head to him, sitting up in the bed and flinging my legs over the edge.

"I brought dinner, I thought you'd be hungry." He smiles softly, kissing my forehead softly. "After driving around California for eight hours."

"Thank you, Jack." I smile, getting my quarter pounder from the bag and placing it on the tray beside the bed. I get my sweet tea from the cup holder, sticking the straw into the hole and taking a sip from it.

"Do you feel bad about lying to him?" Jack asks suddenly, eating his Big Mac quietly.

I look in my lap, sighing heavily.

I hadn't yet been asked that question, and it caught me extremely off guard. I had not only lied to Niall, but I had left him alone to fend for himself. I had so horribly pretended to be sad about my leaving to Ireland, but I guess I really wasn't.

I look up at him, biting down on my cheek and sighing.

"No, I don't feel bad." I tell him.

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