Fate

The shrill sound of my alarm woke me. It was too early to wake up, much too early for me. I'd tossed and turned all night, tormented with dreams of the past. I should've gotten a nice seven hours of sleep, instead I felt as if I'd gotten four.

I stood, stretched, and padded to the shower. I blearily tried to rub the sleep from my eyes, the face that stared back at me in the mirror didn't look like mine. I honestly looked like hell. My eyes were puffy and red, like I'd been crying all night. My skin wasn't glowing and I honestly looked hung-over. I sighed and dragged myself into the shower.

After showering I went to the kitchen and walked nearly walked into Piper, my flat mate. She's another surgeon who tended to work the emergency room with me.

"Are you awake Anastasia? You look half dead." She laughed, tossing her blonde waves over her shoulder.

I glared at her from over my bowl of cereal.

"Did you have a rough night?"

I nodded, "Gunshot wound to the 4th true rib. It was an hour long surgery. That was on top of the normal ER stuff and having to work with Dr. Simon."

"Oh, well it could've been worse couldn't it?" she said, getting up to get another cup of coffee.

"It was Harry."

I watched as she jumped, dumping coffee out of the mug, all over the counter and her hand.

"Shit." she cursed as the hot coffee hit her hand. "Harry. Harry Styles? Well at least it wasn't Sam"

I winced as I heard his name, dropping my bowl in the sink with a crash. "Don't say it, I can't hear his name."

"You can't blame Harry for that marriage you know."

"I'm not, it's just.... God, I really don't know." I sighed.

"Anastasia, I'm your best friend, don't lie. You wish that you would've married Harry somehow, and you wouldn't have had to deal with the past 10 years of hell. Am I right?"

"This is why I hate and love you Piper. You're right but you're so damn unapologetic."

She shrugged, "You won't be mad at me for long. I know you."
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I checked my schedule when I got the hospital. Today I was listed for a normal day, pretty much just surgeries I'd already scheduled and checking on patients I'd already operated on.
My intern was already prepping for an ortho surgery so I figured I'd get checking on Harry out of the way. That was something that didn't need another person there to make it any more awkward.

I grabbed my iPad from where it was charging at the nurse’s station and Harry's files. Due to Harry's condition and popularity, he'd been placed in his own room. When I got to his room, I hesitated outside of the door, took a deep breath and braced myself for the worst.
I was slightly surprised to see that he was awake. He glanced up at me, then did a double-take, surprise crossing his face.

"Anya." he breathed, "You're my doctor?"

I nodded, not trusting my voice.

"You always said you would become a great surgeon, but I guess I never really thought about it actually happening."

I raised my eyebrow and crossed my arms over my chest, "Oh?"

He realized what he said, "Oh shit no, and I didn't mean it like that. I just meant I never saw it become a reality until now. I'm sure you're a great doctor."

"You're here aren't you?" I asked, "So anyway how do you feel?"

"Like I've been shot." he smirked.

"Obviously," I refused to smile, "Do you feel feverish, dizzy, or nauseous? Are you having any trouble breathing?"

"Not really. I'm just in a fair amount of pain."

"I'm sure, but I can't give you any more pain meds or you'll overdose. You should try to sleep though."

"How am I supposed to sleep if I feel like my chest is on fire?"

"You know what we tell the women in labor? If it's too much pain they could just scream. Either a nurse comes rushing is to give them more morphine or the embarrassment of admitting they're in enough pain to scream makes them shut up about it." I smirked.

He frowned, "I thought it was because screaming can make you feel better and take your mind off of the pain."

"I don't know, why don't you find out?" I said, silently daring him. I knew he wouldn't.

He looked at me and took a deep breath. I rushed over and pushed my hand over his mouth.

"Don't you dare. You'll just hurt yourself more." He just glared at me.

"I'm going to have to move your gown to change the bandages."

"Yeah, do I really have to wear this stupid thing?"

"Mmhmm. Imagine having to take out the IV and go through the pain of lifting your arms up to take off and put back on a t-shirt, and then put the IV back in. It's not really worth it."

He nodded and let me untie the gown. When I reached to take off the bandage, the heart rate monitor in the corner of the room started beeping quite a bit faster. Harry looked embarrassed and I tried to stifle a laugh.

"Can't we turn that damn thing off?" He groaned.

"Why does it bother you?" I pushed a lock of hair off of his forehead and laughed as the monitor went off again.

"That the woman I once loved in flirting with me? That doesn't bother me at all." He said. "What bothers me is that I haven't seen you in years and I have absolutely no clue who you are anymore." He winced as I pressed a new bandage down over the stitches.

"Well it isn't like I know you anymore either." I looked down as my pager started beeping. I glanced to see if it was an emergency or not.

"Don't you have to get that?" He asked.

I shook my head, "It's not an emergency, and whatever it is can wait a few minutes."

"So when do I get to see the boys?"

"In a few days. I'm surprised you didn't ask about, what's her name first. Adele is it? Most people ask to see their spouse or fiancé first."

"Well, she's neither. I don't much care for her."

"Then why are you dating her?"

"She's fun to keep around sometimes."

"Are you serious Harry? That's who you've become? The man who sleeps around then drops a girl like she's nothing?"

He looked away, "No, it's just... I haven't found anyone I actually care about."

"Well if you didn't treat women like they're disposable maybe you'd actually find someone who's right for you."

He was silent for a few moments. "You know, sometimes I wonder if the one I was meant for is actually standing in front of me, but I didn't realize it in time."

My breath catches. I want to respond, but I don't know what to say.

"So where is your sparkling diamond ring? Your white coat says Anastasia Jacobs, not Anastasia Bastille."

I look down to my chest in surprise. In my half-dead state this morning I must've grabbed the wrong jacket.

"I'm divorced Harry. Somehow I grabbed this white coat this morning, I'm not sure how."

Which is a lie. I remembered grabbing this one out of the back of my closet, where it's been for almost a year, last night. I fantasized about burning it, throwing it away, just absolutely destroying it millions of times but something always held me back. I must've left it on my bed and grabbed it, not thinking.

All of a sudden the door opened. My intern Lily ran in.

"Dr. Bastille, they need you in the lobby. The paparazzi are everywhere, they want Mr. Style's doctor."

"Are you kidding me? How'd they get it in?"

I ran out into the waiting area, and was nearly blinded by flashbulbs.

"Are you Harry's doctor?" one yelled
"Is he okay?"
"Will he die?"

Shouts were everywhere.

"Shut up!" I yelled, "Yes, I'm Harry's doctor. Right now he's fine, but you need to get the hell out of this hospital!"

"Hey, aren't you his old girlfriend? They showed you on the X-Factor a few times."

"That was years ago. And as his doctor I'm telling you to leave. Now."

I turned away and headed back into the hospital. Something told me that this wasn't going to end well.

Notes

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Hopeful Directioner