Fate

My head snapped up as a clipboard was waved in front of my face.

"You got another one. Lower left abdomen shot, should be here in about 5 minutes." I heard a male voice say from around the paper and plastic currently two inches away from my nose.

I sighed when I realized it was Dr. Simon. He's probably the absolute worst person to spend a night in the ER with. His eyes and hands always wandered and were just as misplaced as his comments, but he was a damn good doctor and surgeon.

I scanned the sheet summarizing everything I needed to know about the patients’ medical history and what had happened.

I sighed, "I just stabilized and sent the last one in for surgery."

"You're lucky it's a slow night, because you're on your own for this one." Simon said, turning away, "I'm over hours, I have to go home."

I cursed under my breath and turned as an ambulance pulled up, lights flashing and sirens blaring.

A rush of adrenaline and excitement passed over me as I ran to the double doors as the EMS pulled the gurney out of the back of the ambulance.

I froze as I saw who my patient was, a shiver ran down my spine and I could feel the blood rush from my face. I'd only scanned the sheet to see what I needed to know to start treatment, it never crossed my mind to check the name of my patient. Harry.

His tanned face was covered with a sheen of sweat, and though he wasn't conscious you could tell he was in pain. His shirt had been removed revealing a long toned abdomen, adorned with tattoos. His left arm was covered with countless tattoos, two sparrows were inked just under his collarbone, and palm fronds were placed symmetrically above his hipbones. My eyes moved to the partially removed butterfly on his ribcage. The left wing had been ripped open by the bullet, and was covered by the EMS.

The body I had once known so well, the pink lips that had memorized mine. I looked at my first love, my high school sweetheart. I was glad he was unconscious, so he couldn't see what he still did to me. My hands shook a bit as I lifted up the gauze temporarily covering the wound. My breathing was hitched and I could tell that my heart rate was elevated.

"This just isn't going to work between us anymore. We clearly want different things and I..." he stopped, and shook his head. "I'm just so sorry."

I looked up across the table, and my vision blurred. Warm, salty tears were falling freely and rapidly down my cheeks. I opened my mouth to say something, but I couldn't speak.

"I couldn't want anything more than for this to work. But I'm leaving Cheshire soon and you don't have any time for me."

I found my voice again, "I don't have time for you? Harry, I'm just going to university like most teenagers, but you're traveling across the country with 5 other boys. I've wanted nothing more for this relationship to work. We've been long distance for months, but you can't blame me for us not working anymore."

He sighed, "Isn't this how it always is for us? Something always ends in an argument."

"You're making it sound like you're happy that this isn't working."

"Happy? I'm happy that I've spent nearly 3 years of my life on a relationship that ends in nothing? I'm happy that I could've spent these last few months not having to worry about keeping up a relationship? No, Anya, I'm fucking pissed."

"So that's it then? You wasted 3 years of your life with me? It wasn't worth it at all? Because this isn't just ending with nothing, it's ending in heartbreak."

He stood and walked over to me. I turned away so I wouldn't have to see him leave, but instead he lifted my chin so my face was level with his. "It was worth it love. But it's not anymore." He moved and pressed his lips to my forehead before he turned and left the room. I bit my lip and listened as he grabbed his keys and walked out of the apartment. As the door clicked closed, I let out the sob I'd been trying to hard to contain.

I shook my head to clear my memories. I couldn't let any creep up on me today, I couldn't be vulnerable.

I turned my attention back to the EMS, "Keep pressure on it," I said to him as a nurse ran over and began preparing an IV. "Did it hit the heart?"

He shook his head "I stabilized him and it doesn't appear to have hit the heart or lungs miraculously. The 4th true rib was shattered upon impact but helped stop the bullet from penetrating much further. It appears to have been a low velocity gun fired from a distance."
I nodded and turned to the nurse, "Prep him for surgery."
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After the hour long surgery, I strode out into the lobby. I was met by four men who had changed my life astronomically. Four men I tried to know as little as possible about. Whenever I heard or read their names, I immediately stopped what I was doing. I didn't need to be reminded of what happened.

But now I couldn't avoid them. I took a deep breath and told them of Harry's condition. Their alcohol and grief glazed eyes were all on mine and I was grateful for the relief of a distraction. A short blonde walked up behind them. It was obvious she'd been partying with the group, in her stripper-high heels and skin tight mini dress. Harry's standards certainly had fallen.

"Well when can I see him?" she demanded.

"You can't. The ICU only allows family members. And with Harry's current condition, he's at high risk of infection, so I'm only allowing medical staff to see him currently."

"Well you must be a shitty doctor if you can't prevent an infection." she snapped.

Niall cut me off before I could respond, "Adele, you're an idiot. Just go home."

She looked shocked, but I turned and nodded Niall, "I assume I'll see you four tomorrow. He's stable enough now that I can go home."
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When I returned home I immediately got into the shower. I stood there under the steaming hot water, silently questioning God. I don't understand why this would happen to me. It's been years since I last saw Harry, and now he's back intertwined into my life. My love life hadn't been so great since my relationship with Harry ended.

I gazed down to the scar covering my hip, I remembered clearly how I'd gotten it.

The bathroom door burst open and the shower curtain was yanked back. I jumped back and slipped, the razor flying out of my hand and onto the shower floor as I fell. I felt a sharp pain as my hip hit the razor, the skin slicing open, drenching the tile in scarlet blood.

"Why the hell are you home so late?" He boomed as he stumbled his way to me.

"I was working. You know I work late on Tuesdays." I said.

He grabbed my upper right arm, and yanked me up, his fingers digging painfully into my skin.

"Did you know that most people who say they're working late are actually cheating on their spouse?" He growled, and I could smell the alcohol on his breath.

"What the hell Sam? Why would I be cheating on you?" I asked, surprise filling my voice.

He didn't reply and pushed me away from him before turning and slamming the door behind him.

I reached down to pick up the razor, my hand shaking. The sparkling diamond on my left hand caught my eye. I felt the urge to take it off, to pack up and leave, to end this marriage. But no one would believe me if I told them the things Sam did to me. Besides divorce is frowned upon in my family, and where would I go if I left?

I sank down to sit under the spray of the shower, tears pooling in my eyes.

I re-emerged from the memory to find myself in the same position under the shower and felt the familiar prick of tears in my eyes.

Why was everything coming back to me all at once? All of the memories I worked to hard to suppress daily, flooding back just to drown me.

Notes

Hey guys thanks for reading!

It's obviously early in my story, but feel free to comment, vote, and most of all- subscribe!

I appreciate that you took the time to read my first chapter and I hope you continue reading!

Love,
HopefulDirectioner