Carmen's POV

It's about three in the afternoon when I wake up, still beside Harry who is sleeping quite soundly. It takes me a moment to figure out where I am and why I'm so exhausted; must be the jet lag. Harry's house...it's strange to be here, where he grew up. It's a whole other part of his life that I didn't have a way to see before, and now it's all right in front of me. It's terrifying, but in a good way. Now that I realize his mother isn't going to hate me I feel a little more at ease.

That is, until I realize Christmas is three days away and I haven't gotten any gifts yet, including Harry's. I don't even know where I could go for shops here. Plus, the whole driving on the other side of the road thing probably wouldn't end well if I tried to go on my own. The last thing I want is to crash someone's car my first day here.

Harry's grip actually tightens when I try to move, and it's not until I pry his fingers from my arm and lift his arm from my body that I can escape. He mumbles something incoherently and my hand goes to my mouth to stifle a giggle. When he turns onto his side and sighs I take that as my chance, being as quiet as I can when I dig through my suitcase to find something to wear. I wasn't expecting to have my own bathroom here, but it's amazing. And it's absolutely gorgeous with all modern finishes and expensively soft towels. They're even hanging on one of those heated racks so they're already warm, and the tiles have heating underneath so they're warm as well. It's like a palace in this place.

The lock on the door is one for an engineer, though, so I decide to just take my chances and leave it unlocked. The shower is one of the ones you step into but doesn't have a door, a tiled wall separating it from the rest of the bathroom. I like that; I don't like it when I can see myself showering in the mirror. It's weird.

After a long, hot shower and with a warm fluffy towel secured around my torso I look through all the expensive toiletries that have been left in here. Did Anne buy these for me? I hope not, I've never even heard of half the products, nevermind knowing what they're used for. I pull on my jeans and bra, but my curiosity gets the best of me and I forget about my shirt. When I'm applying some sort of face cream to my skin the door opens and I jump; Harry steps in and his eyes go wide when he sees me.

"I uhh..." He clears in throat and finally looks up at my face. "Sorry. I didn't think you were in here."

"Well...I am."

"I see that."

He stands there for a moment, just staring at me like I'm more naked than I actually am. He looks back into the bedroom and then steps inside, shutting and locking the door without even looking.

"How did you do that?" I ask. "That lock is weird."

"No it isn't," he laughs. "But I don't think it would be in my best interest to show you how to lock this door."

"Harry."

He smiles and stops directly beside me, my body still turned towards the mirror with the face stuff in my hand. He gently takes it away and sets it on the marble countertop, then slides up behind me and puts his arms around my waist, skin bare. My cheeks are warm as he kisses my cheek, then my neck, then my neck again and again and again until my eyes flutter closed and my body leans back into him. He starts sucking on a spot below my ear and I instantly jab him in the stomach with my elbow.

"Don't," I scold, smiling at him in the mirror. "No hickeys."

"Fine," he says, rolling his eyes. "What about in places my mum can't see?"

My heart races as his dark green eyes bore into mine and he dips his head again to kiss my neck. That idea is definitely intriguing. Suddenly I spin around and wrap my arms around his neck, standing on my toes to press my lips as firmly to his as I possibly can. He lifts me with ease, hooking my legs around his waist and setting me on the counter. I don't know if it's because we're here together or if he feels more comfortable in his own house or what, but the way Harry is kissing me today is with a passion that I've never felt from him yet. He's also trying to take things a little further.

And I think I'm okay with that.

My fingers find the bottom of his t-shirt, quickly pulling it over his head. His large hands are moving all around my skin, fingertips occasionally digging in a little hard than normal. My back arches and I slide a little closer to the edge of the counter so I can be closer to him, the skin against skin contact driving me to insanity. Harry's one hand moves over my bra, cupping me through the material and applying pressure that makes me moan.

"Fuck." He stops exactly where he is and I'm very aware of the tattoos on his chest as it rises and falls so fast. "Carmen I can't- I can't think straight. I don't want...you have to tell me to stop."

"I didn't say stop," I whisper, my lips only an inch from his. He stares at me for a moment and I pull his face back down to mine. He sighs into my mouth, tongue hot against mine. I want something, anything really, but nothing feels like it would be enough. I need him. All of him.

But I'm nervous. I've never had that problem before, and I've never had an issue taking things as far as I want. But with Harry, there's just so many thing swirling around in my mind and it makes me so scared to try something. I just want him to initiate everything, which I know isn't fair since he's probably more scared than I am after everything I've put him through.

My hands are shaking when they slide down his sides, around to the front of his jeans. He separates from me for a minute and I'm sure he's going to tell me to stop, but then he kisses me again, even harder than before, and my fingers move to unzip his pants. One of his hands tangles into my hair and my mouth hurts from the pressure of his lips, but it's incredible. As lightly as I can manage I touch him through his boxers, and he sighs into my mouth. When my palm applies more pressure he moans quite loudly, precisely the reaction I was going for.

"Okay, hold on," he says suddenly. I stop what I'm doing and look up at him. "I don't think I can do this with my Mum in the house."

"You're thinking about your mother right now?"

He laughs and rests his forehead against mine. "It just occurred to me that they're here. The house was just renovated, but it's still old and the walls aren't umm...soundproof."

"Oh."

"Yeah. Fucking stupid."

I laugh and shake my head, sliding my hands up over his chest. His heartbeat is fast under my hand and his hands rest on my legs, sliding up my thighs. Of course we wait until we're here to let ourselves go further than we normally do. Of fucking course.

"Well then." I slide off the counter, my body pressed tight against his as I reach to try to get his pants done up again. "I guess I'll finished getting dressed."

"Yeah that..." He looks down at my body and raises his eyebrows, my fingers pulling the button closed on his jeans. "That would probably be best."

I kiss him once more, a simple kiss. But when I break it and try to move to the side his lips are hard against mine and his arms are around my back and mine are in his hair and everything goes fuzzy.

"Shit." He stops and actually steps back from me this time, my hands reaching back for the counter so I don't fall over. "Okay. Okay, I'm going to...yeah."

He suddenly walks out and I can't help but laugh at how weird that little exchange was. Cute, but a little strange. I slide the loose long-sleeve I chose over my head and pull a brush through my damp hair, not bothering with make up or anything else. Harry isn't in my room when I walk out, and when I open the door I hear a shower running down the hall. I decide to venture into the house, taking my phone in case my Dad decides to text or email or call or something, anything really.

When I get downstairs Anne is sitting in the living room with a book, reading glasses sitting on her nose. She looks up when I walk down and smiles.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt your reading." I walk to the couch and sit on the one adjacent to hers. She shuts the book and sets it on the table with her glasses.

"No, you weren't. I'm bored anyway. I'm glad you two got some sleep, you're probably pretty tired from the flight."

"Yeah." She saw us? Shit.

"Carmen, can I be honest with you about something?" When I nod Anne stands and sits next to me on the couch. I turn to face her more and she smiles kindly at me, a motherly smile that makes me ache. "Harry told me...well, when he told me about you he said you were just friends."

I nod, not sure where she's going with this. I've had one conversation with this woman and now she's trying to have what seems to be a pretty personal conversation with me. Not that I think she's being rude, it's just not something I'm used to, I guess.

"I don't want to overstep," she says quickly, probably noticing my apprehension. I laugh nervously. "It's just, I don't want you two to feel like you have to hide anything from us. Harry doesn't bring girls home, so if you're here you obviously mean a great deal to him. So, whatever is going on between you two-"

"Mum, what are you doing!"

I turn around, relieved to see Harry coming down the stairs, pulling a shirt over his wet hair. He gives me an apologetic smile and stands behind the couch between the two of us.

"Harry, relax. We're just chatting. I know you two aren't just friends so you might as well stop trying to act like it. I saw you all cuddled up sleeping together."

"Mum, you are so embarrassing."

"I'm just saying!" She puts her hands up and I laugh when Harry covers his face with his hands. "Don't feel like you have to hide anything on my account!"

"Okay, enough. I'm stopping this right now. We get it, you know we like each other. No more talking, please."

"Fine, fine." She stands and goes back to her own couch. "What are you two doing today?"

"I actually need to buy some gifts," I say, looking at her and then Harry. He smiles and rolls his eyes.

"Is that your way of asking me to take you shopping?"

"I would take myself, but do you want me driving your car on the wrong side of the road?"

"It's actually the right side of the road."

"I know, but it's wrong."

He laughs and shakes his head. "Fine. Mum, do you want to come?" We both look at her and she's just sitting there smiling, eyes moving between the two of us. After a moment I look at Harry. "Mum..."

She shakes her head. "Sorry. What, darling?"

"We're going to the shops, did you want to come with us?"

"Oh, no you two go ahead. I'm going to get started on dinner and your sister should be here soon."

"All right." Harry stands. "I'll just get our coats from upstairs."

---

"It's hard to buy gifts for people you don't know," I tell Harry, looking through the selection of sweaters in one of the stores. "What kind of stuff does your mother like?"

He shrugs. "I don't know."

"That's so helpful."

He laughs and throws his arm around my shoulder. "I'll help you find something. She probably doesn't expect you to get her anything, though."

"She's letting me stay in her home for Christmas. I'm getting her a gift."

"She likes reading. She reads anything, so you could get her a book. And she's got this obsession with scarves lately. And cardigans."

"See." I look up at him and link my fingers with his that are dangling over my shoulder. "Look at you, being helpful. What about Gemma?"

"Anything girlie. She has the most makeup I've ever seen in my life. But she also likes gift cards, because she usually exchanges everything she gets anyway." He shakes his head at the thought and it makes me smile that he's got a family that he knows so well, so well he probably doesn't even realize. I wish I had a brother or sister to know like that.

We walk around for a while without a lot of purpose. When I see something I think one of them might like I buy it, but there's no rush for me. We could spend all day and night walking around like this and I'd be okay with that. As we walk through the different shops I can't help but notice that Harry doesn't ever get too far from me. In fact, most of the time he's touching me somehow. Arm around my shoulder or my waist, hand on my shoulder, holding my hand, hand on my back. It's not something I'm accustomed to, but I definitely think it could be. He keeps me...warm, I guess. It's an odd feeling, not easy to explain.

"Harry?" He hums in response, not looking up from the back of the book that he's reading. "What do you want for Christmas?"

He looks up then, smiling small at me. "Nothing."

"I've learned that people who say they want nothing secretly want something really bad." He laughs and I loop my arms around his waist from beside him.

"I've got everything I want," he says, still looking at the book cover. "You don't need to get me anything."

"But I'm going to anyway, so you might as well give me an idea."

"What about you? What do you want?" Clever subject change, Harry. Note the sarcasm.

"I told you, I don't like getting gifts."

"I guarantee my mother bought some for you."

"I'm not going to ban the nicest woman on the planet from buying me presents."

He laughs. "But I'm not allowed to buy you gifts?" I shake my head and he rolls his eyes. "Carmen, it's Christmas."

"Exactly," I agree. "So tell me what you want."

"Let's just agree to get each other something small, okay?" he suggests, setting the book down and sliding his arm across my shoulders. When I look at his chest I notice two necklaces hanging there. I know he wears them all the time, but for some reason it never occurred to me to ask about them or see what they are. They're almost always hidden under whatever shirt he's wearing, only the chains visible. When his shirt is off there are so many other great things to look at so I don't think to notice.

"What are these?" I ask, tugging on the chains. He reaches for them and pulls the pendants out of his shirt.

"One's a paper plane," he says, looking at them. "The other one is just a cross."

"You wear them all the time," I note. He nods.

"Yeah, my sister gave me the paper plane one when she left for university when I was fifteen. And the cross was actually my Dad's. He gave it to me when I was seven when he and Mum got divorced. Told me as long as I wore it he'd be there for me, something stupid like that." The sad finality to his tone makes my heart ache for him, but I can see on his face that he doesn't want to talk about this right now. I never asked him what happened with his parents or how much he sees his Dad; I guess I just assumed they had a relationship, but maybe I was wrong. He's got to mean something to Harry, though, if he wears that necklace every day.

---

It's strange how fidgety my body gets just knowing Harry is sleeping right down the hall from me. After the conversation we had with Anne today Harry said she wouldn't care if we slept in the same room, but it felt strange to do that with her knowledge, I'm not sure why. So with a slightly disappointed smile and a gentle kiss on my lips he left me to go to my own bedroom. Now I'm regretting that since I haven't been able to sleep at all. It's only ten at night back home, so that could be why.

As quietly as I can manage I pull Harry's sweater over my head and pull some slippers Harry's mother leant me. The floors are cool on my bare feet without them. When I open my door I know I must look ridiculous with the way I'm walking, but I manage to get downstairs without much sound and apparently without waking anyone. I decide to make myself some hot chocolate, but it proves harder then necessary since I have no idea where anything is in this kitchen.

"What are you doing?"

I jump probably a foot off the ground at the sound of Harry's voice, my hands clambering around so I don't drop the spoon that was in my hand. He laughs and adjusts his pajama pants on his hips, which are hanging far too low, as he walks over to me.

"I couldn't sleep," I tell him, my heart racing from the scare. "I was going to make a drink."

"Alcohol won't help." He smiles and goes to the low cupboard next to the fridge and pulls out the kettle. "Looking for this?"

"Yes!" I take it from him and fill it with water. "What are you doing up?"

"See, there's a reason I wanted you to sleep in my bed," he says, leaning against the granite and folding his arms over his broad chest.

"And what's that?"

"As you can see I couldn't sleep either."

"It's probably just the jet lag," I offer, plugging the kettle into the wall. He smirks.

"Maybe. Probably not, though. You know, you move around a lot when you sleep. I got used to that. Sleeping alone is too...quiet."

"Harry, we've slept in the same bed like five times," I say, laughing a little. I got used to sleeping with him too, but that doesn't mean it makes sense.

"Yeah, but a lot of those times were recent and I enjoyed them." He puts one arm out and pulls me against him. Even this is making me more sleepy that I was before. "If you don't like tea what are you making?"

"Hot chocolate."

He laughs. "Pure sugar. Great for putting you to sleep."

"I can't help that I don't like tea."

"Can I make you some? We only have steeped tea in this house and it's way better."

I roll my eyes but smile anyway. "Fine."

Harry kisses the top of my head and takes out two mugs, moving about the kitchen skillfully and staying pretty silent as he does. He's got a certain amount of grace to him, like an athlete. Though he says he's never been very good at sports. I'm not sure if I believe him, though. When he's done I reach for a mug, but he takes both and shakes his head.

"You're going to make me tea and not let me drink it?" I ask, folding my arms.

"Upstairs. Come on." I flick off the lights asI follow him back up, and he enters his room even though my bed is a little bigger. He waits for me to get on the bed before he hands me the mug, and when he turns the light off and crawls in beside me I'm just staring at him.

"Clever strategy," I whisper. I take a sip of my tea and silently agree that this is better. Harry is quite obviously smiling at me, probably a smug little smile that I choose to ignore. "I really do like the spiderman sheets."

"Mum thinks she's so funny. I even texted her and asked her to change them before we got here, but apparently she loves to embarrass me."

"It's cute. Your family is great, Harry."

"Yeah, I like them." I laugh and snuggle closer to him, his arm moving around my shoulders. "You'll stay here, right?"

I want to. "It's weird, though. My Dad would never let you sleep in my bed."

"Fuck, I would never sleep in your bed if your Dad was there."

"Then why do I have to sleep here!"

"Because if you don't I won't sleep. At all." He sets his mug down and I hand him mine, only half empty but all I really needed. He slides down so his head is on the pillows, lower half covered by blankets. I try to quickly climb over him and run out of the room, but my knee slips and I end up falling directly on top of him. He laughs and secures his arms around me, holding me down so I can't get away.

"Harry," I warn half-heartedly. We may not sleep well separately, but I don't see us getting much sleep if we're in the same bed, either.

"Stay," he whispers. Before I can actually think about I'm nodding my head, Harry finally releasing me so I can go under the blankets. I take off the slippers and toss them on the floor, then remove the sweater since I don't predict being very cold right now.

"Woah, why are you undressing?" he asks, sounding offended. "What kind of man do you think I am?"

"You are such a dork." I lay back down with my shorts and tshirt still on, even though I rarely sleep with this much clothing. If Harry wants me to stay dressed then that's what he gets.

"You don't sleep with pants on," he reminds me, his fingers running along the top of my shorts, laying on his side with his head propped up on his hand.

"You told me to stop taking my clothes off. Just giving you what you want."

"Well, I want your pants off."

"Wow. That's quite forward."

He laughs and lifts the blankets so he can roll on top of me, his body pinning me down which I am happy to endure. I push his hair away from his eyes and let my arms rest above my head, pleased by how not awkward it is to just be silent with him like this. My relationship with Harry holds many surprises for me, ones that I'm happy to discover as they come. Never in my life did I expect to feel this comfortable with someone, this peaceful, this much like myself. He makes me even find out new things about myself, things I didn't know I was capable of and I love that about him.

"Can I tell you a secret?" I whisper. He nudges his nose with mine as he nods, making me smile. "I'm still not that tired."

"The magical tea didn't work?"

"No," I laugh. He smiles and his head hangs a little lower, a little closer to my lips.

"I can think of other ways to make you tired."

"Harry, I..." When I look up into his eyes, hooded but still bright even in the dark, I can't help but wonder if I'm keeping him a little too far away. After all this time I'm pretty sure he's not going anywhere. Why do I insist on keeping him at arm's length? I want him, I want to be with him.

"What?" he prompts, his thumb tracing my jawline.

"Nothing," I whisper, defeated smile on my lips. I know what I want, but telling him that is a different story. I know he's afraid asking will scare me off, but I really wish that he would.

"Carmen, what?"

"I just...I'm fine. It's fine, forget it."

"You sure?"

I nod and place my hands on either side of his face, pulling his lips down to mine so he won't ask anymore. There's so many things I could say to this boy, so many things I want to say. Harry makes me feel things that I never thought I could, and I want him to know that. Telling him....that's the hard part.

Notes

i would just like to say i dont know who gave harry is necklaces in real life or what they mean, so i just made stuff up :P so dont be upset.

aaaaaanyway. i like that chapter :) i have an idea for whats going to happen while they're in england so its gonna be good. i know this story is happening really slowly, but thats what i wanted for it. carmens character requires it so i need to just take the time to let them figure their shit out u know?

hope you guys like it :)

soooo like i said last time, i would looove some more votes before i post the next one :) it might seem petty, but i feel like if theres more votes then more people will read and that would make me really happy :) thanks guys!!!!


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