One month earlier.

It took me a while to realize that this ‘thing’ was not usual; in fact, it was very unusual. It had never occurred to me that it would eventually happen because frankly, no one thought it would happen too. I was confused – very confused as to how it could happen.

Harry was tired.

No.

He was exhausted.

Sure, I had seen him tired before but this time, it was different. It was the kind of exhaustion that a sleep could not erase, the kind of exhaustion that drained him both physically and emotionally.

Even so, he made an effort to make an appearance at Liam’s birthday party with me. Everyone else might not see that he wasn’t actually there but we did. We saw it. But we tried not to let it get through us, let alone mention it to him.

“Finally decided to leave the cave, eh?” I teased Zayn who had just arrived at the club alone.

The corner of his lips twitched as he rolled his eyes, trying not to take my tease seriously. “Yeah, I suppose leaving my cave is necessary when it comes to my boy, Liam.” He emphasized the word ‘cave’ while his eyes searched around the room for a sign of Liam. “Where is he, anyway?”

I tilted my head to my left; “We made a bet that you wouldn’t be here. Guess I lose my ten pounds.”

“You made a bet on me?” He raised his voice as if he had never made a bet on anyone before. He had, a lot of times before. “Sucks to be you, Spencer.”

I crinkled my nose as I brought the glass up to my lips. It was just ten pounds, anyway.

A familiar pair of arms was suddenly wrapped around my waist and I instantly relaxed, knowing whom it was. “Hey babe,” he kissed my hair as I leaned against his chest. Looking up, he said, “Hey Zayn.”

Zayn examined the two of us before he nodded his head, “Hey Harry.”

The two of them talked for a while before Zayn excused himself to talk to the birthday boy.

Turning around so I could face him, I then looped my arms around his neck, standing on my toes as I tried to reach for his lips. Even if I wore the highest pair of heels I’ve ever owned, he would still be taller than me – and he would always make a joke of it as if it was funny. I did laugh because his jokes were always cheesy and I lived for the way he smiled when the jokes had been told.

But tonight, as our lips met, he didn’t make those kinds of remarks later on. He was silent, instead.

No ‘you wanna know why I love you? It’s because you’re shorter than me’, no ‘Sky, it’s time to get rid of your high heels because it’s no use’ and there was also no ‘high heels won’t make you taller than me, Sky. You still have to beg for my lips’.

It was strange.

“Is everything alright?” I dared myself to ask. He should be all right because we were supposed to celebrate Liam’s 21st birthday party. It would be a downer if either one of us weren’t here.

Harry hummed in response as he took my glass from my hand and drank it.

I eyed his every move and noticed that something was.. off. He wasn’t talkative and he wasn’t greeting everyone he knew like he always did.

“Am I late?” He whispered breathlessly as I slowly turned around to see him standing right in front of me in his white crisp shirt and a pair of black jeans. I thought he wouldn’t be here, I thought he was going to leave me all alone tonight.

But he didn’t.

Standing up from the stool, I kissed his lips. He was taken aback by my gesture but didn’t take long enough to kiss me back.

“So I am not late, then?” He grinned as I pulled away. Shaking my head, I said no.

“Holy shit, how did you land this one, Sky?” My cousin, Janice asked. Her eyes almost bulged out and her jaw was dropped open.

Smiling, Harry extended his hand. “Harry.”

“Of course I know who you are!” Janice exclaimed, taking his hand eagerly and shook it longer than it was appropriate. “Wow, I can’t believe you came here.” She looked around and let out a huff, “to a small event.”

“I’ll be with Sky wherever she is; let it be small event or big event. I wouldn’t mind,” he smiled as he answered it and I was certain that I was puddy in his arms. How could he be so sweet?

“Damn you’re lucky Sky.” Janice said, playfully slapping my arm.

“I am aware of that.”

“Oh shit. Tell me this is not the real Harry Styles.” Another voice exclaimed.

He held out his hand and gave Lisa his smile. “Hi. I’m Harry.”

She took his hand and shook it. I could see the moment she really looked at him and registered how ridiculously beautiful he was. “I’m Lisa.” She mumbled.

“Nice to meet you, Lisa.”

And just like that, Harry worked his way down the bar, introducing himself to every single one of my family member. In him, I saw the polite boyfriend he was, but even more than that, I saw that Harry was just a really sweet guy.

When he returned to me, he kissed my cheek and whispered. “Your family members are nice. Thanks for inviting me.”

“Yeah, sure.” I mumbled, almost losing the ability to form coherent thoughts. Nothing in my life made me feels the way he was making feel – so bloody good.

My thoughts were interrupted by a shout coming from Niall. He was apparently urging the birthday boy to do shots – that bloody Irish kid – and made everyone chant Liam’s name.

I smiled as I watched the scene in front of me but I was more aware of how Harry tensed behind me. “You okay there, baby?”

He didn’t say anything but he nodded his head.

“Do you want to bail?”

Harry was quiet and I knew he was contemplating on whether it was appropriate for him to leave the party when it was in the full swing.

“I’ll tell him there’s something going on at home.”

I watched as his Adam’s apple bobbed when he gulped. Then, he nodded.

“I’ll talk to Liam.”

It was difficult to get to Liam when everyone was surrounding him – shouting his name, even. I flinched each time someone shouted by my ears, and after two minutes trying to get to the front, I finally did.

And Liam draped his arm over my shoulder. “Hey Sky!”

“Liam,” I stated. “Look, something happened back at home.”

He immediately pouted and I had to look away to push away the guiltiness that slowly creeping in.

“Harry and I – we got to go.”

Before Liam could say something else, his friends pulled him away from me and I took it as an okay – for Harry and I to leave. He had everyone here so the absence of the two of us would mean nothing.

Walking back to Harry, I watched as he scrolled down the timeline of his twitter, his brows were furrowed as he tried to read each of the tweets.

“Ready to go?” I asked.

He looked up and nodded.

After that, the silence came back when he drove us back to his flat. He didn’t hum to the songs on the radio; he didn’t even try to start a conversation so I stayed quiet.

*

I slowly unzipped the dress, trying to think of something that could possibly changed Harry’s mood. And when I gave up on thinking, I settled with just one simple reason: he was exhausted.

As I pulled my hair into a ponytail, I felt his warm lips placed on my shoulder and it made its way from left to right – with each kiss he left, I felt my heart beating faster and faster. I hummed in response, loving how his lips danced against my skin.

I never thought of myself as anything but plain, ordinary and problematic until Harry came along. The way he looked at me, the way he saw me.. he pulled something out of me. When I wanted to hide, he urged me forward. When I thought I was not good enough, he made me believe I am. When I felt anything but pretty, he convinced me I’m beautiful.

Slowly and quietly, Harry helped me out of the dress. He was careful as if I was a porcelain doll. He twirled me around so we were face to face and smashed his lips against mine. The intensity of his kiss was too much and I pushed him to his – our – bed and let him continued his journey south. My eyes were shut as he kissed my belly, his grip on my hipbones tightened.

And as he worked his way with me, I tried not to question the sudden change in his mood. Alternatively, I enjoyed the moment I had with him – I always had. The moment we let ourselves become vulnerable to each other.

Suddenly, my insides started to twist and a burning sensation erupted deep in the pit of my stomach. “Let go, baby.” The sound of his voice was all it took for me to fall apart beneath him, my body shattering into million pieces. I let out one loud moan, calling out Harry’s name while I reached the peak of my climax.

He kissed the way up to my face, and rested his nose at the back of my ear. My chest was rising and falling, my eyes fluttered open after he left a small kiss on the tip of my nose.

“I love you,” I hummed, reaching up for the pendant hanging from his chest and started playing with it. He watched me as if I was the prettiest or the most stunning scenery he had ever seen.

After placing one firm kiss on my lips, he rolled over and lay next to me. Next thing I knew, he was asleep.

So I listened to his breathing and fell asleep to it.

*

Opening my eyes, I was instantly filled with a sense that something wasn’t right. I ran my hand along the sheets in an attempt to assure myself he was there, only to find an empty spot next to me. The room was dark and I reached for my phone on the bedside table to see the time, 3.41 a.m. I sat up and rubbed my eyes, trying to focus on the room around me and was relieved when I spotted a thin sliver of light seeping out from beneath the bathroom door.

I rolled over and pulled his pillow against my body, seeking comfort. I hated waking up with an uneasy feeling.

Some time later, I woke up again, still finding that I was alone. I put on the first ting I found on the floor and walked to the bathroom door. “Harry?” I knocked softly, “Harry, are you okay?”

A groan sounded from the other side of the door. “Just go away.” His voice was hoarse and echoed off the bathroom walls.

“Harry..” I began but he cut me off.

“Just go back to bed.”

Frowning, I leaned closer against the door that separated us both – that separated me from him. “What is going on? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Just please, go back to bed.” His voice was soft now.

“Har-“

“Sky,” he groaned, obviously getting annoyed.

Walking back to the bed, I straightened the blankets and headed to the living room. I switched on the TV and began flipping through the channels. Tucking my legs under me, I waited for Harry to come out from the bathroom. I heard the water running in the bathroom and few seconds later, I heard the sound of the bathroom door was opened.

He didn’t notice me as I stood against the doorframe, watching him getting under the blanket. “Are you okay?” I asked worriedly.

“Yeah,” he buried his face into the pillow and I took it as a sign that he was in no mood to talk.

*

I didn’t know how or when I fell asleep on the couch.

Walking into his bedroom, I was surprised to find him sitting on the edge of the bed with his eyes trained on the floor. He appeared to be deep in thought, but upon my entering, he lifted his gaze to meet mine and the corner of his mouth lifted into a slight smile. Crossing the room, I stopped with my feet just in front of him.

Slowly, he reached out and hesitantly placed his hand on my waist. We stood in silence as is thumbs traced small circles along my abdomen and his other hand moved to rest on my hip. Ever so slowly, he pulled me closer to him, his eyes focused intently on the patterns he rubbed on my shirt.

“I like you in my shirt,” he said quietly. The edges of his smile lifted a little more, something anyone who had studied his feature any less wouldn’t have noticed.

“I like it too,” I whispered. The quietness of the room wrapped around us, the only noise being the sound of his fingers brushing along the fabric and our soft breathing. When he finally looked at me, my chest hurt at how tired he appeared. I reached out to him and lightly brushed the hair from his forehead, loving the way the silky strands slipped through my fingertips.

“What happened last night?”

“It was my stomach,” he murmured. “Must be some food I ate.”

“Why didn’t you wake me up?”

“Because the last thing I wanted to do was to disturb you.”

His words were gentle and I accepted them without questioning it. I stepped between his legs, my arms encircling him as he rested his cheek against my stomach. He sighed deeply and I leaned in, placing a kiss into his hair. “Are you feeling better now?”

“Mhmm,” he answered.

“You look so tired.” I whispered.

His body seemed to relax and I smiled softly. But his answer made me frown.

“I am.”

Reluctantly, I pulled away. “Go to sleep, alright? I need to sort out some stuffs.” Before he got the chance to protest, I added. “Just sleep. Is there anything you need before I leave?”

“No, I’ll throw up in the toilet in case.. you know.”

“Well, thank you for sharing.”

I was about to leave when he suddenly called out my name.

“Will you put on my shirt when you’re done with whatever stuffs you’re going to deal with?” My stomach fluttered at his request.

“If that makes you feel better,” I shrugged, “sure.”

He smiled at me before waving me off.

*

It took me two hours to finish running the errands and to find chicken soup for Harry. I knew just how much he liked eating it when he was sick.

“Hi,” I said, unable to hide my smile when I saw him sitting up in bed.

“Hey,” he answered back. Placing a small kiss on his cheek, I then set down the bag on the bedside.

I emptied the bag in front of him and looked up to find him staring at me. “What? Did I forget something?”

Lifting his arm, I couldn’t help but laugh as he held up his shirt.

“How could I forget?” I smiled.

Harry eyed the item in front of him with a confused expression. “You went out for two hours just to get a chicken soup for me?”

“Don’t flatter yourself, babe. I ran some errands before I bought the soup.” I shrugged off my jacket and put on his shirt. Rounding the bed, I got under the blanket and looked at him.

“Thank you,” he said sincerely.

It was the way he looked at me that swelled my heart. Leaning forward, I placed my lips against his lips. He was about to pull away from me – probably because he wouldn’t want me to get sick too – and I placed one of my hands behind his neck and deepened the kiss.

“You don’t have to say thank you, Harry.” I breathed out, resting my forehead on his. “I’d do anything for you.”

He was quiet for a moment as if he tried to absorb my words. Then, unhurriedly, he nodded his head and leaned in for another kiss. This time, his kiss was urgent. I knew he wanted to tell me that he was thankful, that he wished he could do something in return.

He didn’t have to.

Because he had changed me. Entirely.

I loved my Harry – the one that no one outside of this room could see, the one that he chose to show merely to me. And I loved myself when I was with him.

Harry ate his soup in silence, every now and then asking me if I wanted some of it. “It’s okay, Harry. Finish it.” And he resumed to eating.

After that, I told him to sleep because he looked so tired and I wouldn’t want him to fall sick again. “I’ll be in the living room if you need me,” I whispered, leaning in to kiss his hair. His hum was the only response that I got and I crossed the room to grab my phone.

Is Harry okay? Z.

With a slight frown, I told Zayn that Harry was sick.

Are you okay?

My frown got deeper. Why wouldn’t I? After telling Zayn that I was indeed okay and there was nothing to be worried about, I shoved my phone back into my bag and left the room.

Deciding that Harry would have not waken up in at least two hours, I left his flat to go back to my flat. I was surprised to see Daisy sprawled out in front the TV with a tub of ice cream in her hand.

“Daisy?”

“Oh, hey.” She replied, sitting up. “Sorry I didn’t tell you I came here last night. I suppose you spent the night with Harry?”

“Yeah.” I answered shortly. Picking up the letters from the coffee table, I plopped down next to her. “He was sick.”

“Ah.” Was her only response.

“He was quiet too. It was strange, you know? To be the one talking all the time and he just either hum or nod his head.” I spilled out everything to Daisy, not knowing when or how I got the courage to do so. I tended to keep everything to myself but not this time. “Do you think he’s okay?”

“I think he’s dead tired.”

“I guess.”

“I mean, with the world tour – it’s just, his world is moving too fast, don’t you think?” Before I could answer, she added, “He needed time to adjust with everything.”

Harry had always loved his job and never once I heard him complaining about it – even if he got mobbed.

“I think you’re right.”

“I’m always right.”

But at the moment, neither one of us realized that she was wrong.

Notes

it would mean A LOT if you rate and leave comments, because it makes me so happy, what, with the bloody assignments waiting for me omg
anyway, i hope you enjoy this kinda short chapter.