"Where the hell were you?!" Niall shouted when we walked through the door three hours later.

I walked over to one of the two beds and stopped at the edge of it with my thighs touching the mattress. I stared at it.

"This girl," Harry said loudly, dropping the bag of movies. I assumed he was pointing at me, but there was a wall behind me and he was on the other side of it. He continued, "has some really nice comebacks."

I flopped onto the bed, face first.

The room was silent for a moment.

"What brought that up?" one of them asked. I'm not sure which one, because my face was still in the marshmallow-y bed.

"Thith beh ih wiwwy wumfy," I said into the mattress to nobody in particular. Or, at least I attempted to say it, because it came out NOTHING like it was supposed to.

"What?" somebody asked.

I rolled over. "This bed is really comfy," I repeated. THIS time it came out like it was supposed to. "It's like... frothy. It's frothy."

There was a long pause, and I could almost feel five pairs of eyes watching me.

"Anyway," Harry said, continuing. "She--"

"Can we not relive that experience, please?" I asked, cutting him off. "I'd rather watch a movie or go do something."

"But--"

"Hey!" I said suddenly, bolting into an upright sitting position. "Let's play a game!" Nobody said anything, so I continued. "Let's play this new game called Let's-Not-Talk-About-The-Creepy-Weirdo-At-WahpVideo. I think the rules are pretty self-explanatory."

Harry sighed, defeated. "Fine."

"Much better. I'm bored. Let's go do something," I said.

"How 'bout we order another pizza?" Niall offered, staring dejectedly at the empty box.

We all just stared at him.

"What? I'm hungry!"

Liam turned to Harry. "Where were you?"

"At WahpVideo," he answered simply.

"Well what took you so long?"

"We had to talk to law enforcement about this creepy guy," I said. "I'm bored. Let's go do something."

"Why?" Zayn asked, sitting up from his spot on the other bed.

"Because I'm bored. And I'm not tired," I answered.

"No. Why did you have to talk to the police?" he rephrased.

"Can we PLEASE not talk about it?" I begged.

"Let's go swimming! This pool is awesome."

I ran toward the door, but was pulled back by Louis.

"We don't have anything to swim in," he said.

"Neither do I!"

"Mel..." Louis said slowly. "You're not suggesting what I think you're suggesting, are you?"

My brows furrowed in confusion as I wracked my brain, trying to figure out what he meant. My eyes got wide and I started laughing. "NO! I am most definitely NOT suggesting what you think I'm suggesting!"

"What? OH!" Liam blushed.

Niall started laughing.

"This is the point where I would say something REALLY perverted to my friends, but I've decided that you people aren't my friends. You're just the people who are bringing me on tour with you. You don't really have much of a choice, but you're still bringing me with you," I stated, grinning. I marched into the hallway, then walked right back into the room. "You guys didn't follow so I came back. I'm gonna put in a movie because y'all are being jackasses and not coming with me."

"That's fine by me!" Niall said. "And since we're going to watch a movie, can we order more pizza?"

Notes

OHMYGOD I HOPE Y'ALL ARE SUBSCRIBED TO ONE DIRECTION'S VEVO ACCOUNT ON YOUTUBE BECAUSE WELL, I DON'T KNOW BUT YOU SHOULD BE.
ONE OF THE SONGS ON THEIR "MIDNIGHT MEMORIES" ALBUM IS OUT FOR THE PEOPLE WHO PREORDERED THE ALBUM AND THEIR VEVO ACCOUNT HAS THE SONG IN AUDIO ON YOUTUBE!!!!!! AND HERE I WAS THINKING THAT "BEST SONG EVER" WAS THE BEST SONG EVER BUT I THINK "STORY OF MY LIFE" COMPLETELY TOPS IT!

AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU PEOPLE HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHAT I'M GOING THROUGH RIGHT NOW! I'M INTERNALLY FREAKING OUT (BECAUSE IF I WAS EXTERNALLY FREAKING OUT NOBODY WITHIN A FIVE MILE RADIUS WOULD BE ABLE TO SLEEP) BECAUSE THIS SONG IS SO AMAZING!

Am I the only person who wishes that YouTube had a repeat button instead of a replay button that you have to hit every time the song ends? I'd rather have a repeat button that just automatically restarts the song, because I'm going to listen to this song in my sleep. That's just how amazing this song is. And if I've been sleeping with my socks on lately (which I have, thankyouverymuch), I'm pretty sure I can fall asleep to a song.
I CAN GET IT! AND I WILL! I'M GOING TO SLEEP!

GOODNIGHT, MY WALRICORNS! I LOVE Y'ALL! NOW GO LISTEN TO "STORY OF MY LIFE", BECAUSE IT ONLY HAS EIGHT MILLION VIEWS!