The Wanted Feeling

Harry's pov:

I sit up from my bed and look at the clock. It's only five in the morning and I guess school doesn't start until seven thirty. I'm quite scared about this. I mean I've never been to a school filled with people who can hear.

I see Michael still sleeping, and I look around my floor. I find a small tube and chuck it at him. He rolls over and sits up quickly.

' What the hell!' He signs quickly. I smile and cross my arms.

' Can't sleep.' I sign. I'm suppose to try to verbalize when I sign now but I'm afraid I will sound funny to other people so I don't. So I still make random noises instead of sounding vowels and stuff.

He rolls his eyes.

' don't wake me up; we have school later and now I won't be able to sleep.' He lays back down covering his head with his blanket.

Well he's no help. I can't sleep because I'm scared. What are people going to think of me? Me and Michael? We arnt like them. We can't talk right... Let alone hear. I push it aside and lay back down. I have a Good hour to sleep them I have to get up.

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I am woken up by Michael jumping on my bed like a little kid. I push him off and grunt.

' Get up you ha-' I close my eyes so I can't see what he's signing to me anymore. He shakes my hands trying to get me to open my eyes. I laugh keeping my eyes closed. He soon leaves them I pop my head up making sure he's gone before I get up to get ready. I feel my phone vibrate.

from: Mom

'Sorry I couldn't be here on your first day baby. But please make it a good one and remember to verbalize. I love you so much honey.'

I don't respond because she knows I'm going to try and I love her. I make my way to the bathroom. I took a shower last night so I don't need to take one right now. And plus I think the messy hair look looks fine on me. I wear a lot of bandanas but today I'll skip. I feel a tap on my shoulder.

' We are going to be late; brush your teeth and let's go.' Michael signs.

I nod and pull my toothbrush out brushing very quickly. I'm still really nervous about this new school.

we had to switch schools because our special Deaf Academy closed down. They were making enough money. So they are throwing all of us into 'normal' school. Whatever.

I go out to the car followed by Michael locking the house door. He smiles at me as he gets into the car. He is really excited about it. He doesn't seem nervous at all. I am so nervous I feel like I want to vomit.

We pull into the school and there are kids everywhere. Walking up to the school and hanging out around it. They are all having conversations and talking so fast I can't read any of there lips. I sigh and hold my head down. Michael taps my shoulder once we park.

'Im with you in this mom' I laugh because he signed mom instead if Harry.

'Okay son.' I jokingly sign. He punches my arm and gets out. I look out the window before walking out. I'm so scared. So so scared.

'We have about five minutes; then we have to go our separate ways; some. Of the teacher know we can't hear and have signers whereas some don't.' He finishes signing slowly. People are looking at us awkwardly as I begin to sign back.

'What; I have to tell them im deaf; how if they don't have a translator Michael.'

' You write it; but I have to go; you'll be okay and if not; text me and I'll be right here.' He turns around rushing off into some classroom.

I walk through the halls slowly. I don't make eye contact with anyone. I don't want anyone trying to talk to me because if I sign they won't get it.. And if I talk they will most likely laugh.

I make it to the classroom successful. Thank god I see what appears to be a Translator walking up to me signing.

' Harry?' She asks. Well signs.

' Yes; where do I sit?'

' You need to stay up here for a little bit; The teacher needs to tell the class of you disorder.' She signs fast. ' I'm Kelly by the way.'

I hated it when people called it a disorder. I wasn't mental. I just couldn't hear that's it. And the fact I have to stand up here so she can tell the class I'm 'special' man fuck that. But I stay. I stand next to the translator. Kelly. And watch as all the kids take there seats staring at me. The teacher walks in quickly and Smiles at me waving. I wave back.

as the teachers lips move Kelly translates for me.

' This is Harry Styles; he is new here and we would like to welcome him with open arms; he isn't like you and me; he is deaf and can't talk as well as the rest of us and he can't hear; so that's why each of you are taking an ask class this year; but for now you will need to talk slow enough for him to read you lips.' She stops signing and points to a chair next to a girl.

She was really pretty too. She had blue eyes and wavy blonde brown hair. She was stunning actually. But when I look at her she looks away and starts chatting to kid sitting on the other side of her. The are probably making fun of me right now. About how she has to sit next to the retard.

I quickly set my stuff down and just watch the Kelly. I want this to be over.

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' How did it go?' Michael signs at lunch as we sit down at an empty table.

' No one talks to me Michael; no one; im an outcast.' I look down and pick at my sandwich.

He Taps my shoulder. ' No; you have to talk to them; I made a few friends I know you can.' He then stuffs his face with some food.

He's different. He can make friends, he can be spontaneous. He can do the things I can. I am a Nobody in this school. And I know it will stay that way. Michael will forget about me soon enough.

Notes