The Story of my Life

Some days I feel like I have no friends, like nobody cares about me. I feel like they talk to me to be nice. And if that’s the reason, well then I wouldn’t blame them, I’m just a fat, ugly, annoying girl who likes to boss people around. I am really insecure about my body and my weight, that’s one of the reasons I love the song Little Things by; One Direction so much. It describes me and how I feel about myself. The lines ‘I know you've never loved the sound of your voice on tape you never want to know how much you weigh’ really get to me because its true I love to sing but I hate the way my voice sounds and I suck. Also I am really insecure about my body and ya, I do thing I am fat. That’s probably why no guy will ever like me. I mean on the outside I act confident, like I don’t really care that I’m a little bigger than the other girls in my class, but every time I look at another girl I can’t help but compare myself to her, I know I shouldn’t but I can’t help myself. Also I feel like I have no true friends that are really there for me, no friends that can look at my smiling face and know that something is wrong. Someone who can see past the walls I put up every day to hide all my pain. I just wish there was one person, any one to tell me it will all be ok and that the pain will go away. I wish that I had someone to tell me that life is not a fairly tail, that my prince charming will not come and rescue me from my tower so we can ride off into the sun set, that I have to rescue my elf, climb down my own tower and walk off into the sunset stronger than ever. But no I don’t so I will just sit here and wait for my prince charming even thought I know he won’t come. I know I sound self centered and all bitchy because I do, there are people worse off than me, I know that. But the whole reason I’m writing this is to show you that just because someone my look happy, smile all day long, and be a shoulder to cry on all the time, doesn’t mean she is happy it just means that she knows how to hide the pain inside her with smiles and laughs.

Notes