Harry's diary

Great I smell like pot now. It's like last dark now and I'm sure paps got a shit ton of pictures to please josh.
i walk slowly I to the house. They boys are all On The couch. they look at me the moment I walk in.
" Hey." I mutter,
" save it styles. So are you ready to tell us why you want to leave the band." Liam says.
I am ABKUT to speak but Louis cuts In. " no it's fine harry we know why! When did you start doing drugs harry.. When!" Shit they already saw the pictures. I am about to cry but stop myself.
" You don't understand- I don't know!" I remember I must do what josh wants.
" Your right we don't!" zayn stands up now. Niall is sort of sitting there uncomfortable.
" I just am going through a lot guys." I lie.
" Like what... you could've have asked us to help. But now your willing to leave the band for this. It is ridiculous harry!" Liam shouts.
" Well after I heard about Louis I was-"
" dont blame this on me styles!" Louis shouts. I wasn't I was going to say I'm heartbroken.
" Sorry guys it was stupid.. I'm not leaving the band." I fake an apology.
" I'm not so sure it's the best idea you stay." Liam surprises me with those hard words.
" What?" I gasp. he stands up and stomps up the stairs. I can hear him scream fuck this.
" It doesn't matter if Louis is getting married it's not going to ruin the band." Zayn says. little does he know that's not what I'm afraid of.. I'm afraid of losing the love of my life.
" I know. I going to turn in." I sprint up the stairs leaving them speechless in sure. I throw my phone at the wall and stare into the mirror at my reflection. What is happening to you man. I don't even look happy at all, there are dark circles forming under my once emerald eyes to what are now a dim dark green. I look awful. I bear crawl to my bed and lay down. I hear my door open.
" hey can we talk.." It Niall. It's so good to hear his voice. I sit up and run over to him and hug him.
" Please don't hate me niall you guys just don't understand what I'm going through!" I sob into his shoulder. He rubs. My hair.
" Shh it's okay haz.. I'm not here to criticize I'm here to listen." I felt a little better he said that. I wipe the tears from my eyes and sit back. Now I have to make up something... SHIT I FUCKING HATE LIFE. No. Forget it. I have to tell Niall he won't say anything I know him. I start slow letting the words roll of my tongue as he nods.
" I'm so sorry harry I never would have guessed. He can't do that! I'm going to tell someone." I flinch.
" NO you can't. He will show my diary niall you can't!" I cry.
" Well this can't go on!" Niall looks deep into my eyes.
" Well.. I have to go with it or else my world is ruined. It already is I mean Louis is get-" I can't even say it.
" shh it's okay harry. I'm here for ya." He wraps his arms around me again. I cuddle into his neck and stay there.
" what are we going to do then.. " I look at Niall.
" Your going to take your diary back." He says.
" How!"
" we will figure out something I promise." He is fixing me now.
" Then what do I do about Louis." I feel my heart ache.
" It's okay. I once heard someone say love always finds it's way." Niall stands up to leave.
" Thank you!" I say. He nods and walks out. I feel a little better now that he knows about my diary but what am I going to do with Louis.. I'm not even sure if he loves me.

Notes