“I know it’s a pain.. I really wouldn’t ask you if it wasn’t urgent! But could you please look after Lux for a night or two?"

“Lou, you don’t need to ask, I’m bored stiff when Harry’s busy. I’d love to.” I smiled into the receiver, at the prospect of taking care of Lux for a few days. I rested the phone between the crack in my neck and shoulder, trying to prepare everything for the fashion show the next morning. Harry hadn’t returned home the night before, and it didn’t help that I had felt like crap most of the rest of the night. I had gotten a text from him to say he would be home tonight, but it was nearly bedtime and there was still no sign of him.

“You’re an angel, Annie. I love you both. Good luck for tomorrow, I’ll be there front row with your biggest fan on my lap!” Lou chimed. “I’m talking about my two year old daughter, not your twenty-one year old boyfriend."

I laughed, bidding her goodbye and placing the phone down on the table. I left my bags up by the door and made my way to bed. The crisp cotton was welcoming on my skin, and it wasn’t long before I was dozing off.

During the night, I felt two arms wrap around me tightly. At first I snuggled into them, but then I remembered Harry and I were in an argument. I scooted away, trying to keep some distance. Harry pulled me back, and pressed his lips to my ear.

“Stop it, I love you.” He said, tiredly. He rubbed my hips and placed a kiss on my neck.
“Where have you been?” I asked, and it sounded like more of a groan.
“I’ve been recording,” He yawned. “Something for you. Go back to sleep."

I paused and thought hard to myself. Kendall had made a statement as soon as the rumours came out and in all fairness, her story coincided with Harry’s down to the last letter. I placed my hand on his, and I felt him smile into my hair.

---

“You need to eat something,” Harry said, placing some pancakes in front of me. I shook my head and almost gagged at them.
“I can’t. I’ve never been so nervous in my life."
“Don’t be nervous.” He said, “You’re beautiful, and I’m obviously not the only person that thinks it, if a model scout wants you.”
“They probably only want me because I’m with you.”
Harry sighed and sat down next to me. “Annie, you’ve got to stop being so hard on yourself. You are beautiful, you obviously are. You and Eleanor basically have the whole club full of guys surrounding you when you go out.”
I smiled at him, even though his attempt at breakfast made me want to die.

Shortly after we made our way to the show and Harry left me to take his seat in the audience. My hands were shaking, my whole head was whirling. I knew then that I wasn’t cut out to be a model, not at all.

“It’s fifteen minutes 'til you’re on! You ready?” El passed me a robe to wear until I took to the stage. I nodded, not capable of speech. I had always been quite shy and awkward when it came to this sort of thing. Not to mention the fact that Harry had only just found out I would be half-nude. He actually took it pretty well, though.

Louis was meandering around backstage, trying to help his girlfriend, who was now borderline psychotic with stress, organise the show. I was starting to feel worse. I decided to take a trip to the bathroom. I leaned over the sink and stared in the mirror. Feeling my stomach churn, I took to the toilet stalls but nothing inside me wanted to come up. I took another few deep breaths. I heard someone at the door.

“Annie? It’s Louis, are you in here? Eleanor’s going mad..”
“Sorry.” I said, quickly, letting myself out of the stall. “I felt ill.”
“Are you alright? Were you sick?” He asked, looking at me unsurely. I shook my head. “No, I just felt like I was going to be."

In those few seconds, it sort of crossed my mind how many times this had happened lately, but it never really registered that it could have been something sinister. I was just nervous, that’s all. And now I was letting my mind trick me into worrying that this was something it wasn’t. I cleared my throat, sensing the uneasiness between us.

“I’m just nervous.” I said, and I wasn’t sure who I was trying to reassure, then.

I followed Louis out, and by this time, it was my turn. I took a deep breath and did my walk, not looking at the audience, not looking at anything, just staring through the wall at the back like it was hollow. I heard cheers, in the back of my head. The loudest ones were from the boys, as Perrie came out behind me. I could hear Zayn. I knew Liam had stopped cheering once Danielle had come out.

Then, I made it backstage. I breathed a sigh of relief, feeling much better. Eleanor owed me, big time.

---

“I never realised how big your boobs were,” Niall offered from the back seat. Harry had agreed to drop him off at the after party. I decided to skip it, my head starting to feel more and more filled with worry.

“Niall, I will stop this car in a minute, and I will hit you.” Harry said, steering with one hand.
“Thanks Niall, that’s a nice compliment.” I laughed, and looked back out of the window.
“Are you sure you don’t want to go to this?” Harry looked across at me. I shook my head.
“I’m tired, and I have Lux to look after tomorrow, and the next day.”
“Ah, little devil will drive you crazy.” Niall said, engaging in our conversation.
“Do you mind if I go?” Harry ignored him.
I shook my head.
“Are you going to come back to mine after, H? I was going to just have you boys over for some poker.”
Harry looked at me, again. I sensed he wanted to go. I also sensed he was asking my permission.
“Go!” I laughed. Harry smiled cheekily and nodded.
“Yeah, I’ll come, mate."

After dropping me home, the boys went straight back to the party. I trembled up the stairs and laid out on the bed. I stared at the ceiling, wondering if I had been blowing things out of proportion. Pulling out my phone, I headed straight for the calendar.

My heart fell when I realised something. Barbados had been over a month ago, and I hadn’t had a period since. The five day trip had to have been the only time in my life I had forgotten my birth-control, but I didn’t really worry too much. The first few days, I had been on my period, and after that, Harry and I had only slept together once. Most of the time we were with Eleanor and Louis, and the rest, just enjoying each others company. I was pretty sure Harry hadn’t used any protection, but I was just as certain that he hadn’t.. well. Finished inside of me.

I scolded myself, because if this was really happening, I had done something really, really stupid. I had been an idiot.

Suddenly I was thankful Harry wasn’t at home, because I knew the colour had drained from my face. I closed my eyes, remembering I had agreed to having Lux for two days. I would have to somehow sneak out and get a test. I crawled into the bed, not even bothering to undress, trying, and failing to go to sleep.

Notes

thanks for all the subs and votes :)