Dancing With My Scars - On Hold
Chapter 6- Worse
Not Ready to Make Nice- The Dixie Chicks (song to listen to while reading)
Bella's POV:
No, please Louis... Just get away from me. Please stop, just let me go. Stop, that hurts. When will someone save me? Louis don't touch Mia... She's not yours! Louis!!!
I let out a huge gasp of air and pop up from my bed. My body is drenched in sweat and I had been clawing at my arms in my sleep. I glance over at the clock, it's 7 am. I haven't had a nightmare like that in so long... Why now? Niall is still fast asleep and Mia is in her crib safe and sound.
"Niall... Niall wake up." I mutter shaking him.
"What's the matter, babe?" He whispers half asleep.
"I'm gonna go for a drive... I can't sleep. I'll be back soon." I whispered kissing him on his forehead and grabbing my sweat shirt and keys. Who can I turn to at this time? I selfishly think of Harry, but I know that won't do me any good.
Me: Zayn... are you awake yet?
It was a long shot, but I don't really know who else to turn to. My body is still trying to recover from my nightmare when I step into the harsh cold morning air.
Zayn: Yeah, what's up?
Me: I need someone to talk to... Meet me somewhere?
Zayn: I'll be at the bagel shop down the road in 15.
Me: Thank you x
That worked out better than I had planned. I can't help but replay the bad dream over and over in my head, it's freaking me out. When I pull up to the bagel shop, it's empty aside from the man working in side who I'm friends with.
"You're here early." Dustin smiles at me.
"I couldn't sleep." I say wiping underneath my eyes.
"The usual?" He asks heading towards the back.
"You're the best." I call after him and leave the money on the counter. I take a seat at a table and put my head down to rest, I'm absolutely exhausted. It took me forever to convince Niall to let me hang out with Harry today, and I refuse to tell him about the kiss just yet.
"Good morning, love."
Harry?
I tilt bring my head up to the person who just greeted me, and rub my eyes a few times before realizing it's Harry.
"Surprised?" He asks pulling up a chair and sitting across from me with a stupid smug look on his face.
"What are you doing here... I thought I texted Zayn?" I asked scratching my head. Was I that tired that I texted Harry thinking it was Zayn?
"You're not going crazy, I just responded on Zayn's phone pretending to be him." He says almost reading my mind. I hear a bell ding and it snaps me out of my pissed off mood. I get up from the table and grab my yogurt parfait and coffee from Dustin who has a concerned look on his face.
"Is that creep giving you a problem?" He asks, I assume regarding Harry. If only he knew that creep is Mia's father.
"No, he's an old friend. Thanks though." I smiled before heading back to my seat.
"So what do you need to talk about?" He asks taking a sip of my drink without asking. I roll my eyes, but don't tell him no. Things flow so naturally between us, I doubt he even thought before taking a sip of it.
"Nothing." I mutter stirring the spoon around in yogurt. I notice a frown appear on his lips, making my heart beat out of my chest. My subconscious is screaming at me, telling me to just let him in. "I had a bad dream... that's all." I admit, gradually looking up at his desperate eyes.
"Bad dream about what?" He asks scooting his chair a bit closer to me.
"A bad dream about Louis." I spit out. It was sitting on the tip of my tongue and I was going to keep it to myself, but Harry just does something to me. It's indescribable and I hate it/love it.
"How often do you have those?" He asks avoiding eye contact with me.
"I haven't had one in three years..." I whisper, taking a small sip of my coffee and passing it off to Harry. He nods his head and for some reason, he looks so sad.
"Do you think my return triggered them..." He asks, peeling at his finger nails. My heart melts at this, but is he right? I think about it before responding and then I finally get a clue. Chris Avery is why I had a nightmare.
"No, it's not you. Don't blame yourself, this isn't even a big deal..." I try, finally feeling like an idiot for not realizing this early.
"It's a big deal. What do you think triggered them?" He asks. I let out a huge sigh before I am about to explain to him everything that's been going on.
"Hey look, they're talking about you on TV!" Dustin shouts turning up the volume. Oh my gosh no.
"With dancers like Olivia Venice being paired with major celebrities like Pretty Little Liars heartthrob Keegan Allen, Bella Adams has been paired with a non-celebrity partner who's named Chris Avery. Chris was shot in the foot at 20 years old and needed to give up his dancing career, but Bella is here to teach him to dance again with his so prosthetic foot." The announcer beamed. I looked down at Harry who had squeezed the coffee cup so hard it was spilling everywhere.
"Christ Harry." I mutter reaching for napkins and cleaning the spill. My actions are frozen however, when I hear Chris' voice on the television.
"I'm really excited to finally be backing dancing, and Bella is an old friend of mine... I just can't wait to get out there and give it my all. I think our partnership will be really strong and I hope we can go home with that mirror ball trophy." He smiles into the screen. Chills run through my spine and I study his face. His eyes are darker, but he's still very good looking.
"Congrats, Bell!" Dustin cheers from behind the counter. I'm speechless looking down at Harry, who has steam bellowing from his ears.
"I can explain..." I whisper sitting back down. He's staring off into space, and I take that as an opportunity to explain myself. "Our producer Heath asked us anyone would mind working with a non-celebrity partner this season, and without knowing who it would be I said yes. I had no idea it would be Chris... What are the odds of that?" I say calmly and nervously.
"The last time he saw you, he said you would pay..." Harry says with a weak voice.
"Things change over time... People change. It might not even be a big deal." I try, but he storms out of the bagel shop without a word. Fuck.
"Harry, just give me a damn minute! Stop running!" I call after him. He wasn't physically running, but he was escaping. I pull him by his arm and steady him in front of me. "It might be ok... I'm a stronger person than I was before." I say with a hint of sadness.
"You think it's unsafe for me to be around Mia, and now you're dancing with Chris Avery on TV? You're going to be spending all your time with him! Louis' brother! For all you know they could be planning to kill you!" he growls in my face.
"We don't know anything! Niall thinks that he's changed from what he's heard--"
"Oh and if Niall thinks that, then everything's ok, right? You're not ok, you're having nightmares!" He growls.
"My life is a fucking nightmare Harry. Don't try to be there for me, I wasn't even going to tell you." I spit coldly.
"You're so stupid Bella... I can't even look at you right now." He mutters going inside his car. I step back and watch him pull away from me and I'm alone again, leaning against a brick wall at 8 am. I look down into my bag and notice I have 5 new messages.
Zayn: That was Harry....
Niall: Where the hell did you go?
Liam: Was what I just saw on the news true?
Olivia: We're on TV this morning! Yay!
Harry: I'm still coming over later today to be with Mia. You may be stupid but you're still the mother of my baby... our baby. Clear your head and I'll clear mine and then we'll talk.
I should feel pleased, but I feel like a childish little girl. I don't know what to do with my life right now. The only thing I can think of that would make this better is Jamie... And she's not here anymore which just makes everything so much worse.
Bella's POV:
No, please Louis... Just get away from me. Please stop, just let me go. Stop, that hurts. When will someone save me? Louis don't touch Mia... She's not yours! Louis!!!
I let out a huge gasp of air and pop up from my bed. My body is drenched in sweat and I had been clawing at my arms in my sleep. I glance over at the clock, it's 7 am. I haven't had a nightmare like that in so long... Why now? Niall is still fast asleep and Mia is in her crib safe and sound.
"Niall... Niall wake up." I mutter shaking him.
"What's the matter, babe?" He whispers half asleep.
"I'm gonna go for a drive... I can't sleep. I'll be back soon." I whispered kissing him on his forehead and grabbing my sweat shirt and keys. Who can I turn to at this time? I selfishly think of Harry, but I know that won't do me any good.
Me: Zayn... are you awake yet?
It was a long shot, but I don't really know who else to turn to. My body is still trying to recover from my nightmare when I step into the harsh cold morning air.
Zayn: Yeah, what's up?
Me: I need someone to talk to... Meet me somewhere?
Zayn: I'll be at the bagel shop down the road in 15.
Me: Thank you x
That worked out better than I had planned. I can't help but replay the bad dream over and over in my head, it's freaking me out. When I pull up to the bagel shop, it's empty aside from the man working in side who I'm friends with.
"You're here early." Dustin smiles at me.
"I couldn't sleep." I say wiping underneath my eyes.
"The usual?" He asks heading towards the back.
"You're the best." I call after him and leave the money on the counter. I take a seat at a table and put my head down to rest, I'm absolutely exhausted. It took me forever to convince Niall to let me hang out with Harry today, and I refuse to tell him about the kiss just yet.
"Good morning, love."
Harry?
I tilt bring my head up to the person who just greeted me, and rub my eyes a few times before realizing it's Harry.
"Surprised?" He asks pulling up a chair and sitting across from me with a stupid smug look on his face.
"What are you doing here... I thought I texted Zayn?" I asked scratching my head. Was I that tired that I texted Harry thinking it was Zayn?
"You're not going crazy, I just responded on Zayn's phone pretending to be him." He says almost reading my mind. I hear a bell ding and it snaps me out of my pissed off mood. I get up from the table and grab my yogurt parfait and coffee from Dustin who has a concerned look on his face.
"Is that creep giving you a problem?" He asks, I assume regarding Harry. If only he knew that creep is Mia's father.
"No, he's an old friend. Thanks though." I smiled before heading back to my seat.
"So what do you need to talk about?" He asks taking a sip of my drink without asking. I roll my eyes, but don't tell him no. Things flow so naturally between us, I doubt he even thought before taking a sip of it.
"Nothing." I mutter stirring the spoon around in yogurt. I notice a frown appear on his lips, making my heart beat out of my chest. My subconscious is screaming at me, telling me to just let him in. "I had a bad dream... that's all." I admit, gradually looking up at his desperate eyes.
"Bad dream about what?" He asks scooting his chair a bit closer to me.
"A bad dream about Louis." I spit out. It was sitting on the tip of my tongue and I was going to keep it to myself, but Harry just does something to me. It's indescribable and I hate it/love it.
"How often do you have those?" He asks avoiding eye contact with me.
"I haven't had one in three years..." I whisper, taking a small sip of my coffee and passing it off to Harry. He nods his head and for some reason, he looks so sad.
"Do you think my return triggered them..." He asks, peeling at his finger nails. My heart melts at this, but is he right? I think about it before responding and then I finally get a clue. Chris Avery is why I had a nightmare.
"No, it's not you. Don't blame yourself, this isn't even a big deal..." I try, finally feeling like an idiot for not realizing this early.
"It's a big deal. What do you think triggered them?" He asks. I let out a huge sigh before I am about to explain to him everything that's been going on.
"Hey look, they're talking about you on TV!" Dustin shouts turning up the volume. Oh my gosh no.
"With dancers like Olivia Venice being paired with major celebrities like Pretty Little Liars heartthrob Keegan Allen, Bella Adams has been paired with a non-celebrity partner who's named Chris Avery. Chris was shot in the foot at 20 years old and needed to give up his dancing career, but Bella is here to teach him to dance again with his so prosthetic foot." The announcer beamed. I looked down at Harry who had squeezed the coffee cup so hard it was spilling everywhere.
"Christ Harry." I mutter reaching for napkins and cleaning the spill. My actions are frozen however, when I hear Chris' voice on the television.
"I'm really excited to finally be backing dancing, and Bella is an old friend of mine... I just can't wait to get out there and give it my all. I think our partnership will be really strong and I hope we can go home with that mirror ball trophy." He smiles into the screen. Chills run through my spine and I study his face. His eyes are darker, but he's still very good looking.
"Congrats, Bell!" Dustin cheers from behind the counter. I'm speechless looking down at Harry, who has steam bellowing from his ears.
"I can explain..." I whisper sitting back down. He's staring off into space, and I take that as an opportunity to explain myself. "Our producer Heath asked us anyone would mind working with a non-celebrity partner this season, and without knowing who it would be I said yes. I had no idea it would be Chris... What are the odds of that?" I say calmly and nervously.
"The last time he saw you, he said you would pay..." Harry says with a weak voice.
"Things change over time... People change. It might not even be a big deal." I try, but he storms out of the bagel shop without a word. Fuck.
"Harry, just give me a damn minute! Stop running!" I call after him. He wasn't physically running, but he was escaping. I pull him by his arm and steady him in front of me. "It might be ok... I'm a stronger person than I was before." I say with a hint of sadness.
"You think it's unsafe for me to be around Mia, and now you're dancing with Chris Avery on TV? You're going to be spending all your time with him! Louis' brother! For all you know they could be planning to kill you!" he growls in my face.
"We don't know anything! Niall thinks that he's changed from what he's heard--"
"Oh and if Niall thinks that, then everything's ok, right? You're not ok, you're having nightmares!" He growls.
"My life is a fucking nightmare Harry. Don't try to be there for me, I wasn't even going to tell you." I spit coldly.
"You're so stupid Bella... I can't even look at you right now." He mutters going inside his car. I step back and watch him pull away from me and I'm alone again, leaning against a brick wall at 8 am. I look down into my bag and notice I have 5 new messages.
Zayn: That was Harry....
Niall: Where the hell did you go?
Liam: Was what I just saw on the news true?
Olivia: We're on TV this morning! Yay!
Harry: I'm still coming over later today to be with Mia. You may be stupid but you're still the mother of my baby... our baby. Clear your head and I'll clear mine and then we'll talk.
I should feel pleased, but I feel like a childish little girl. I don't know what to do with my life right now. The only thing I can think of that would make this better is Jamie... And she's not here anymore which just makes everything so much worse.
Can you plz update? Hopefully Harry finds Bella.
1/14/18