Fanfiction 101
Truly, Madly, Deeply
(3) Your main plot, according to summary, is supposed to be about the student falling in love with the teacher. However, that lasted like… not even that long and they were already fucking in the second chapter. There are so many things that are unrealistic contributing to your story.
1.She invites him over to her house after only knowing him – her teacher – for one day – not even a day.
2.Schools are supposed to do background check on every staff, so I highly doubt a former gang member could become a teacher.
3.Teachers don’t sympathize student’s tears as much as you made it look, unless they’re in like kindergarten or preschool, which they aren’t.
4.I can’t even continue because everything is just too unrealistic.
Try to be more realistic, because unless you’re from an alternate universe where nothing is supposed to be realistic, your story isn’t believable.
Your grammar is eh. You need to capitalize your chapter titles and spend more time editing and going back to make sure everything is written the way you want it.
If you found this review to be disappointing, I'm can't say I'm sorry. As I said, I am a brutally honest person, or so people tell me. If you would like me to take this down, I will, just ask me. Don't bitch about it either; I don't care what you think, I'm just telling you what I think. Don't get mad, you asked for it. Don't rate this badly just because you don't like what I say. But on the off chance you like what I'm telling you, I'm glad you could learn something from me.
@That_clifford_girl
Hi! I don't normally do this but I'm just gonna get right on it.
It's in my knowledge that this author isn't coming back. Which means your review isn't coming. But! I recently started up a review store so if you're interested you can link your story there.
All you have to do is click my name and follow the form. :-)
12/31/16