You know when you watch the news and you see some horrible tragic event? You sit there and watch and watch and watch as if you can’t tear your eyes away from the screen but you just can’t look away. And the newscaster goes on and on about horrendous details that you just do not want to hear. After a few unbearable minutes, you just have to change the channel. You go back into your fantasy world, trying to block out the images of reality. You think ‘it will never happen to me’ and try your hardest to block it out of your head.

I thought the same thing. Oh, it will never happen to me. Well, after tonight, I’ve learned to never say never. Anything can happen. I am not invincible.

Standing in the cool night air, though, I never imagined it would happen to me. I was just minding my own business, having a smoke, in a cloud of happiness after an awesome show. Looking back, it was a damn stupid mistake to go outside by myself in the city. I was practically asking for something to happen.

And it did.

It started so quickly, it took my brain a few seconds to fully comprehend the situation I was in. I was too engrossed in my thoughts to notice that the streets had thinned. I was soon completely alone – so it appeared.

Before I knew it, I was grabbed from behind and a dirty hand was pressed against my mouth to keep me from making noise. With sudden, forceful jerks I was dragged backwards. I tried screaming, I tried kicking, I even bit my attacker’s hand. But nothing helped.

Scrapes soon adorned my limbs from the way I was being yanked backwards and my heart was in my throat. This is the end. I’m being kidnapped. I’m going to get murdered. They’re never going to find my body. I’m going to die.

My life flashed before my eyes. My parents – they would never get over it, Amira – she wasn’t just a cousin, she’s my best friend; she won’t ever accept my fate, all my friends and the rest of my family. Tears stung at my eyes and my will gained a second wind. I fought harder than I’ve ever fought in my life.

It did nothing.

After what felt like an eternity, my attacker stopped. From what I could gather in the pitch black, we were in a disgusting alley of some sort. Fan-fucking-tastic.

I was thrown to the ground with such force that the wind was knocked out of me. I saw a dark shadow move in front of me and I realized what was about to happen before it did. And I froze. I could have gotten up, fought, maybe even gotten away. But I was paralyzed with fear.

He delivered a sharp kick to my side and I let out a yelp I didn’t know I was capable of. Here I was, in a dark alley, alone, having the shit kicked out of me. It seemed like forever until he stopped beating me, when I was starting to loose hope. I was so broken. I couldn’t fight back. I barely whimpered anymore.

He leaned down, as if to inspect an interesting insect on the ground. Because that’s all I was reduced to. I could feel matted, dried blood all over. In my hair, on my face, my arms, my legs. Everywhere. My body felt as if it was one massive bruise.

It was then that he made his move. I was fading in and out of consciousness so much that it’s all a blur. I’m actually thankful for that. I don’t think I could handle being fully aware of what was happening to me.

He carelessly tore my jeans down and broke me even more than I thought possible. His hot breath was in my ear as he partook his sick pleasure. I could smell the alcohol on his breath and dirt in his hair. His animal grunting brought me back to reality for a split-second.

I started screaming. As loud as I have ever screamed in my life. I wanted the whole city to hear me. I wanted this piece of shit to go deaf. I screamed until my throat bled. As far as I can remember, I screamed until I passed out or until he knocked me out.

Notes

I know, I know, its intense. But the boys come in on the next chapter so stick with it!
xoxo
Kristen