In Transit

March 2018

February turned into March and it felt as if they’d been on the road much longer than the seven days they were gone. The car was confining, but so were Mason’s feelings for Harry. Nothing about him was perfect, but he was absolutely perfect in the way she thought of him. She was not accustomed to feeling anything like that before. Her feelings were strong and urgent and made her incredibly uncomfortable – especially when she spent long days and even longer nights half an arm’s length away from him.

“Hey, Mase,” she heard Harry ask as they stood across the room from one another in a Maryland hotel room they rented for the night.

They were near the border of Pennsylvania, only four hours left until they were home. But they had been on the road for nearly ten hours and were both exhausted. Mason had a feeling they were both silently praying for one more night away from their lives in New York.

“Yeah…” Mason replied, looking over her shoulder at him as she paused scrounging in her bag for clothes that wouldn’t make her look absolutely gross.

“I’ve got one last joint. Wanna smoke with me?” He asked, smirking at her as he held it between his fingertips.

A smile ravaged her face as she appreciated the fact he was actually asking her to join him. But then it quickly faded when she remembered he said he only smoked when he was anxious or overwhelmed about something.

“Are you sure?” She asked, feeling her cheeks heat up.

“Of course I’m sure,” he chuckled, walking toward the hotel room door, zipping up his jacket.

“Are you coming?” He asked as he turned his head to look at her, slightly cocking his eyebrow.

“Y-yeah,” she stammered and followed him out of the hotel room replacing her coat on her body as the door slammed with their exit.

Mason followed him out the side entrance of the hotel and across the parking lot toward the car, where they both crouched down behind it, sitting on the pavement in the darkness, out of view from anyone. Mason watched Harry light the joint, sucking in a few puffs and letting the smoke expel from his mouth before he took a real hit off of it. He was always so much smoother at it than she was. She always felt like she looked like an idiot smoking this shit, because really, she had no idea what she was doing. She was not familiar with weed culture. She only ever smoked with him. He taught her everything she knew about it just by observing him, and it really wasn’t that much.

As Harry passed the joint to Mason, their eyes connected for a quiet moment, and there were so many questions racing through her brain – so many things she wanted to ask him. But instead, she sucked in a hit and ignored the tugging in her mind and heart.

They were silent for long moments, and Mason wondered if Harry had as much on his mind as she did. And when she looked over at him, watching as his gaze wandered the horizon, she knew he certainly did.

“Are you okay?” Mason asked quietly, hoping she wasn’t prying. His head turned toward her as his eyebrows furrowed in question.

“I’m fine, Mase,” he offered, shortening her name in that perfect fucking way he did.

“I just… I mean, you told me you only smoke when you’re anxious. I just—” Mason stammered, feeling stupid for even asking.

She hated how often she found herself asking that question, feeling as if she was on the same page as his mother and siblings constantly asking him the same thing – a confession he spilled to her just a day before.

“I wanted to smoke with you. I wanted to invite you for once,” he said with a tiny smirk.

“Oh,” Mason said quietly, her mouth going dry as she pried her eyes away from him, looking out onto the horizon where the streetlamps lit up the street in the distance.

“Hey,” Harry said, lightly knocking the side of his arm into hers.

“Hmm,” she hummed, looking over at him.

“Are you okay?” He asked with a quiet smile.

“I’m a little anxious,” she admitted, but she wouldn’t admit to him where most of her anxiety was deriving from – him.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked, his voice low, his eyes staring into hers.

“I just—I’m nervous to go back home, you know?” She confessed only a part of it.

“Don’t I know it,” he sighed, understanding completely.

“Yeah,” she breathed quietly.

“I’m not looking forward to anything back at home,” Harry went on to say, and Mason knew he had a whole hell of a lot more to be nervous about than she did. She didn’t know how to respond, so she didn’t say anything.

“It’s fucking cold out here,” Harry said after a few moments of silence.

“It is,” Mason laughed lightly, noticing her teeth were quietly chattering as her body shook with sparse tremors.

“Come on,” he laughed, getting up quickly, grabbing for her hand to help her up.

Mason grasped his hand in hers and he pulled her up against his body, smiling fondly at her.

“Come on. Let’s go back to the room. Last night away from home,” he said, the smile never fading off his lips.

“Last night,” she repeated, the words coming out in more of a whisper.

Harry tugged on her hand and started pulling her toward the hotel. She couldn’t help the giggle that escaped her lips as her feet had to take two steps to make up for his one long stride. She was so high, and everything was funny to her. When they reached the side door of the hotel, Mason slammed into Harry’s back with an ‘oof’, not realizing they were stopping. Another giggle bubbled up inside of her, and it made Harry laugh too.

“Key?” Harry asked, holding out his hand.

“What do you mean? You have the key,” Mason told him, looking at him oddly.

“Nah-uh. I handed you one,” he said, looking at her wide-eyed as he quickly dug his hands into all of his jeans pockets before searching his jacket pockets.

“I stuck it in my purse and my purse is… in the room,” she told him, just as wide-eyed as he was, and that was saying something because of how incredibly high they were.

“I set mine down on the dresser,” Harry said, his shoulders slumping with the realization.

“I don’t even have my phone on me,” she told him.

“Mine is next to the key,” he sighed, disappointment apparent on his face.

Mason stood looking at him, her mouth agape as her brain tried to comprehend just what the fuck it meant for them. It was less than 40 degrees and nearly midnight in the middle of some random-ass Maryland town, and they were locked out of their hotel room.

“Well, fuck,” Harry said, still staring at Mason, coming to the same shit conclusion she did – they were fucked.

“What are we going to do?” Mason asked him, feeling her heart start to beat faster in her chest as the panic set in.

“I don’t know,” he said, shaking his head.

They stood there for a few moments, looking and feeling like complete morons. And that’s when Harry started laughing, which in turn made Mason laugh. Soon the two of them were doubled over in uncontrollable fits of laughter. How the hell could it get any worse for them? Their lives were filled with these magical shit storms that piled more and more onto their shoulders, and sometimes they couldn’t even breathe from everything weighing them down.

“Jesus fucking Christ,” Harry grumbled as his laughter died off. He let out a loud, frustrated scream that pierced through the stillness of the night. Mason’s smile faded immediately. She knew exactly how he felt.

“Can we… can we go ask for another key?” She asked him quietly.

“You need a key to get into the main door of the hotel after a certain hour,” Harry frowned.

“But… we could try. I mean, even if we’re locked out, we can wait in that entrance part for someone to open the door. It’s got to be warmer than it is out here,” Mason suggested as she shivered, feeling the coldness on every inch of her body.

“I guess we could try,” he said, shrugging his shoulders.

The two of them walked toward the entrance together in silence, hoping for a miracle.

“I’m so high right now,” Mason breathed, feeling out-of-her-mind in the moment.

“Me too,” Harry laughed out loud as they reached the doors to the entrance and went inside the small vestibule to wait for someone to let them in.

For the first twenty minutes they stood in the small space, leaning against opposite walls from each other. They were silent and bored, and when the exhaustion got too much, Mason slid her body down the wall and rested her head against it.

“Here,” Harry said, coming to sit next to her.

“Lay your head on my shoulder. It’s got to be more comfortable than the wall,” he offered.

“Remind me to never smoke with you again,” Mason quipped, her eyes heavily lidded with sleep. Harry laughed out loud at her sarcasm.

“You would have come to find me anyway,” he chuckled lightly.

“You’re probably right,” she said quietly giving him an amused smile.

“I know I’m right,” he said with a satisfied snicker.

“I have terrible cotton-mouth right now,” Mason grumbled as she laid her head against his shoulder.

“We could make-out. You know, swap spit,” Harry offered, craning his head to look at her with a smirk on his face.

“Gross! When you put it like that!” Mason giggled, lifting her head up so she could shove his arm.

“I’m kidding. Calm down,” he laughed, wrapping his arm around her, pulling her back to his side. And she once again got comfortable against him, letting her eyes slip shut.

When Mason woke up, she was curled up against the wall with her head on Harry’s lap. Harry was quietly coaxing her awake as she noticed a man holding the door open for them.

“He’s gonna get us our key,” Harry told her as he helped her up.

It took about ten minutes for the guy to verify it was definitely Harry who rented the hotel room, and they were handed another key card.

“Come on, sleepy-head,” Harry cooed, smiling lightly at her. He looked just as tired and worn down as she did. She was certain he fell asleep too.

“What time is it?” Mason asked as they walked through the hallway back toward their room.

“The clock at the desk said it was after three. That guy was the night manager,” Harry informed her.

“You mean to tell me we just slept in that entryway for three hours?” Mason gapped, looking at him wide-eyed.

“Yep,” he breathed as they finally reached their room.

“Jesus Christ,” Mason breathed as he let them in.

All the lights were still on and their bags were hanging open just how they left them. Mason was in no mood to get ready for bed. She was absolutely exhausted.

“I’m so tired,” she grumbled as she threw off her coat and immediately pulled off her pants, leaving her in just her underwear and shirt as she crawled up into the bed.

“So am I,” Harry said as he took of his own coat and walked over to his bag, throwing off his t-shirt.

“I am going to sleep like a baby,” she sighed as she slipped off her bra through the inside of her shirt and tossed it onto the floor.

“Have you been having anymore nightmares since… since you had that last one about your uncle?” Harry said, wincing almost immediately after he asked.

“Um… not that I remember,” she said quietly, now only thinking about her nightmares.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up,” he said quietly, looking genuinely remorseful.

“It’s okay,” she told him, giving him a weak smile.

“I shouldn’t have… especially right before bed,” he said, shaking his head.

“It’s alright, Harry,” Mason said quietly, watching as he walked toward his side of the bed.

Her stomach flipped as he undid his pants and quietly slipped out of them before getting into the bed next to her. She didn’t know why she was acting like it was the first time they were ever in that kind of situation. She hated herself for the feelings racing through her. She hadn’t felt like this since high school. And in that moment, she realized she was starting to develop a crush on Harry. Could she even call it that? Did people her age, or people with as many issues as she had develop such things? And the only thing that went through her brain to answer her questions was, you’re only human.

Mason laid down next to Harry, her cheeks heated up into a wild blush, and she tried to regulate her breathing so she could actually get some sleep.

“Goodnight, Mase,” he breathed as he turned off the light, leaving them in the darkness. Her stomach flipped again with the nickname.

“’Night, Harry,” she said almost inaudibly as she stared up at the ceiling, her eyes open, even though she couldn’t see anything.

Every particle of her body was wide-awake as she relived all of their encounters over the past seven days. Even encounters they had in the past three years. Why was she only now having these ridiculous feelings for him? She felt like an adolescent. But she was almost certain the feelings developed because of the road trip, because of the long hours spent together. They actually got to know each other. In the past seven days Mason learned more about Harry than she did in all of the three years he was in her life. She made it a point before not to get to know him. She needed him for one thing, and one thing alone, and she wasn’t willing to blur the lines. That was until Harry’s breakdown in his childhood bedroom. That was when it all started. She broke her cardinal rule, and for that, she was suffering the consequences.

“Mase?” Harry asked through the stillness, startling her enough to cause her body to flinch from the invasion of noise.

“Hmm,” she hummed as her heart raced.

“I can’t sleep,” he said quietly as a soft sigh escaped his mouth.

“I can’t either,” she told him truthfully.

He sighed again, but didn’t say anything else. Mason almost thought he fell asleep when his breathing evened out, but once again, he startled her by putting his arm around her waist, snuggling up to her. She froze for a few moments, still kind of convinced he was sleeping, but when she felt his lips kiss her jaw, she knew she was wrong.

He didn’t stop with the one kiss either. His lips moved down her jaw line, leaving a tingling pattern on her skin. She felt herself melting to it immediately as his soft fingertips snaked up into her shirt, dancing across the skin of her abdomen.

Jesus Christ.

“Harry,” Mason said, but to her surprise, it came out as more of a moan, which only encouraged him.

She felt his hand cup her bare breast underneath her shirt, and her lower half tingled with anticipation. His lips found hers and she turned her head toward his, fully accepting the kiss. Her body relaxed and melded with his as he tangled his legs with hers. She could feel him hardening against her thigh through the thin fabric of his boxer briefs, and it threw her head into a tailspin. Sex was always just sex with them – a way to feel, a way to survive. Except now her new found feelings made it something completely different, and she wasn’t sure how to handle herself.

As their kisses grew more aggressive and more passionate, Harry pulled himself up, hovering above her. Mason opened her legs to him, letting him settle between them before he pressed his lower half against her. She moaned against his mouth as the tingling of pleasure grew deep within her as they got one step closer to where she wanted to be. Harry’s hand slid down her bare thigh, bringing it up against his hip so he had easier access to press his hardness against her center, driving her absolutely insane in the process.

“Harry,” Mason moaned again, closing her eyes tightly, trying to rein herself in.

“Mason,” he breathed against her lips in the sexiest voice she had ever heard.

“Why is this so easy for us?” She whispered, trying to find his eyes through the darkness.

“Our bodies know one another, Mason – fondly,” Harry replied easily, pushing up her t-shirt, exposing her breasts.

His head came down to take a nipple in his mouth, and another moan escaped her lips as her fingers gripped in his hair. He thoroughly teased and nipped and tongued the first nipple before moving onto the second, repeating the same torturous process, bringing her body to the brink as she writhed against him.

“Ohmygod, please,” Mason mumbled, her skin heating up to what felt like a thousand degrees as her body begged and ached for him.

“I only ever want to please you, Mason,” Harry breathed against her lips before kissing them.

She moaned in response, her brain not properly functioning as she was sure it was filled with an overwhelming amount of serotonin in that moment – something she was ill-equipped with on a daily basis.

When Harry pulled away from her, a sigh escaped her lips as she looked up at him, nearly whimpering because he wasn’t kissing her any longer.

“I don’t want to go home. I just want to stay right here with you,” Harry told her as his palms slid down the front of her.

“We can stay,” she told him breathlessly. But she knew it was unrealistic the second it fell from her lips. It was a happy daydream.

“Only if we remember the key,” he quipped, smirking down at her as his finger dance across the elastic band of her panties.

“I’ll never forget again,” she giggled lightly as Harry’s fingertips caught the fabric of her panties and pulled them down half an inch as his mouth came down to kiss the newly exposed skin.

Mason sucked in a sharp breath as his stubble tickled her skin before his tongue swiped across her pantie line. His foreplay was literally doing her in. She wanted to scream with every touch, every kiss, every lick. She couldn’t handle it anymore.

“Please, Harry,” she whimpered, sliding her hand gently across his cheek.

He left a hardened kiss on her pelvis before he pulled off her underwear completely. And as if he was looking forward to it all along, his tongue jut out and swiped up her cleft before he slithered up her body, kissing her lips quickly. And then he was gone again, pulling away from her just when she thought they were getting somewhere. But she was pleased to find it was only because he was discarding his underwear onto the floor.

“Mason,” he murmured as his hands slid up her nearly naked frame, her body arching up into his palms.

His hands on her skin, his touch – it made her feel electric. Her whole body was humming with relentless friction. Her desire for him had never been this heightened. She needed him.

Her breathing quickened as he kissed her belly button and then up to each breast before he slid up her body to kiss her lips, like he was treasuring every second he had with her, away from home, away from the reality of his life. Tomorrow he would be brought back to the people who kept a life-changing secret from him. Tomorrow he would be back in the same city, the same clutches as the girl he broke up with over the phone while he was away. Tomorrow he would have to face all of his demons once again. But tonight – tonight she could be his safe haven.

Harry slid smoothly inside of Mason, her mouth falling open as a quiet whimper escaped her throat. He made her feel alive. More alive than she ever felt, and it scared her. She felt the tears welling in her eyes before she realized how emotional she had become. She couldn’t believe how overwhelmed she felt. And the last thing she wanted was for him to see the tears, so she pulled his body to her and buried her face into his shoulder blade as he rocked in and out of her.

“Oh, god, Mason,” Harry groaned in her ear, causing goose bumps to erupt all over her skin.

He continued to move inside of her and she could feel his resistance as she held him tightly against her. He wanted to pull up, but she didn’t want to risk him seeing her emotions. In the end, it only backfired because it caused him to stop and really study her face through the dark once he finally broke free. His body stilled as he hovered above her.

“Mase, are you okay?” He whispered, his voice cracking slightly.

“I’m fine,” she lied, turning her head to the side to avoid his gaze as her hand quickly came up to wipe her eyes.

“Mason,” Harry sighed, pulling up further.

“Don’t, Harry. Please, don’t stop,” she whimpered, intertwining her fingers behind his neck to keep him close.

“Why are you crying?” He whispered, his voice cracking slightly.

“I’m fine, Harry. Just please,” she pleaded with him.

“Mason, I—you… what’s the matter?” He stammered, looking down at her with wide, questioning eyes.

“Harry, it has never mattered before! Why now?” She snapped, feeling the embarrassment and frustration flooding her.

“I just… Mason, I care, okay,” he said quietly, letting out a slight sigh.

“Please, Harry. Just—I don’t want to talk about it,” she whispered, looking away from him again.

“Is it me?” He asked, sounding slightly insecure.

Her heart clenched in my chest. It was. It was solely because of him, but not in the way he was thinking. Except, she had no idea what he was thinking.

“It’s not you,” she lied, still unable to look into his eyes.

“I don’t want you to be sad, Mase. Not when we’re together,” he said quietly after a moment of internal contemplation.

“I don’t think I’m sad,” she admitted.

“It pains me to see you cry,” he sighed.

“I know,” she whimpered, trying her hardest to hold off the tears that were still threatening to fall.

“Then please… don’t… cry,” he said, kissing both of her cheeks where the tears rolled down, literally kissing the tears away.

Mason’s face involuntarily scrunched up with overwhelming emotions as her tears multiplied. Her hands came up to cover her eyes to hide from him.

“Mason,” Harry sighed, pulling out of her.

“Harry, no. Harry,” she said quickly, scrambling to pull him back to her.

“I can’t. Not… not when you’re crying,” he said quietly, shaking his head.

“You’re the only thing that’s going to fix me,” she pressed desperately before she had time to realize how much meaning her words held. His eyes stared into hers as her chest heaved.

“I want to be the thing that fixes you,” he said as he pushed back into her arms, wrapping his body around hers, kissing her lips and her cheeks and her jaw. Kissing the tears as his fingers dug into his hair, cradling her head in his hands.

“You have no idea how you’ve helped fix me, Mason,” he breathed against her skin as his nose nuzzled her cheek.

“Please, Harry. Fix me,” she whispered, and he seemed to know what she meant, like their brains were connected.

He pressed back inside of her, relieving her entire body and soul. He was overwhelming and just right at the same time. He was all of her seven deadly sins wrapped into one. He was her night and he was her day. He was her sun and her moon. He was her highs and lows. He was the darkness living inside her, but he was also the light that fought to shine out of every inch of her. He was her well-kept secret that was about to be spilled. He was the only person who knew all of her secrets and kept them locked up tight inside of him. He was her salvation.

He was everything.

Notes