Login with:

Facebook

Twitter

Tumblr

Google

Yahoo

Aol.

Mibba

Your info will not be visible on the site. After logging in for the first time you'll be able to choose your display name.

Beating Heart

e i g h t y n i n e - broken.

//Harry//

Half of me wants to destroy myself, have someone ripe my head off my shoulders. As I stare down at her, that beautiful girl.. I regret the events from last night. I wish I had never even taken her dress off her body. That body, her perfect, beautiful body - it's now bruised and marked up, all because of me. I can't handle it, I can't control myself. I tried to warn her, but she convinced me to continue. I caved in, I fell for her deadly, dangerous trap. I regret it.

I'm so deeply hurt, I couldn't even stand the fact I was lying next to her. When I awoke earlier, the bright sun shining through the blinds lit her naked body on fire - showing me every inch of her once bare skin. My eyes didn't dare to rip away from the hundreds of bruises, the multiple bite marks.. My heart shattered as I saw blood stains on her skin.

If someone were to walk in here at this very moment, they'd surely believe I attempted to kill her. To beat her to death, to strangle her. That glorious body of hers is ruined and it's all my fault. Her neck is covered in love bites that became too hard, too rough. I tried my hardest to keep my teeth in my mouth, but the animal inside of me broke free.

The left side of her precious face is against my pillow, her hair scattered around - tangled and matted both from our intimate actions and her tossing and turning while sleeping. I had to cover her with the sheet when I got off the bed earlier. I lack the strength and courage to stand here and stare at what I've done to her. I couldn't dare myself to look at the marks over her milky skin.

I've wrecked her.


After a few more minutes of degrading myself silently, I decide it's quite best if I exit the area and get far from her, without leaving of course. I know she'll be upset when she wakes up all alone in our bed, but I know it's what needs to happen this morning. We won't be spending the morning after together, perhaps not this afternoon either.


When I arrive in the living room, I throw myself down on the couch, grabbing my phone off the coffee table. Without thinking clearly, I send a message straight to Sophia. My heart can't take another second of being here - not while I know she's up there all battered. She's going to be hurting like hell when she opens her beautiful eyes, and not just from the lack of my presence. I insist that Sophia come over immediately. My reasoning was that I needed to hunt. It's partially true - last night wore me out as well, took the majority of my strength.

Sophia is going to scold me, tell me how pathetic I am for leaving Julianne - especially after I tell her what we finally done together. Everyone, mostly the guys, have been pressuring me about it for months now. It seems like they wanted more than I did. No, that.. that isn't true. I wanted it, just not now. Not while she is still human. I hope she realizes, when she finally looks in the mirror, why I wanted to just fucking wait. A year isn't long, two years isn't either.

We should have waited..

My ears catch the sounds coming from upstairs, Julianne's groaning and I can hear the movement of the covers. I swallow the heavy lump in my throat, I didn't expect her to wake up this early. It's hardly past eight, and we didn't go to bed at a reasonable time last night.. I try to ignore it, thinking maybe she's just re-positioning herself. However, that fails when I hear her mumble. The wolf in me refuses to block her out, she's my girl - I can't just avoid her.

With a deep breath, I send another message to Sophia, telling her to wait for half an hour or so before she comes over. Not caring on whether she replies quickly or not, I throw my phone down on the table and lean back on the couch. I won't go check on her, I won't go up those stairs, I won't allow myself to see her again - not while she's naked.

From this point on, we will no longer get undressed in front of each other. I won't even let myself be in the bedroom while she's in the shower or bath. I'll sleep with pants on, and I'll insist she wears at least pajama shorts in addition to her usual shirt or nightgown. I can't have the temptation hanging over my head constantly. Of course, it'll never go away fully. She's my girlfriend, my mate, of course I'm going to have that desire - but it needs to be weakened as much as possible for the time being.

For a minute, I wish I didn't have enhanced senses. I wish I was normal, human - just so I wouldn't have to hear her. She's walking around slowly, it sounds like she's putting something on. I gulp gently, knowing she'll be down here to search for me. Also, she's going to get upset with the fact I wasn't there to greet her when she woke. Perhaps this time she'll understand. I doubt it - this is Julianne I'm talking about.

"H-harry?" Her voice sounds scratchy, instantly it makes me clench my jaw. I don't speak, I continue to stare at the blank television screen - debating on whether to turn it on or not. I decide not to, it would be another distraction I don't need right now. "Harry?.." Her voice trails off, still light as a feather, "..baby?" My teeth bite down hard on my cheek, the memories of last night flood to my mind - she called me that so many times, so many beautiful times.

"Th-there you are." The smile is evident in her voice, yet I can tell it's light. She's not jumping with joy, that's for sure. She brings herself to the couch, but doesn't join me. She steps in front of me, crossing her arms on her chest. My eyes lift up her body, noticing that she's put on the shirt I wore last night for dinner. My heart stings, she would look perfect if I hadn't covered her in bruises. "You left me again." She huffs, clearly irritated with me.

My eyes fall back to her stomach, I never went above her chest. I can't look at her face, I can't dare myself to. Why would anyone want to look at the marks they put on the person they're supposed to love? The only woman I've ever loved.. yet I've broken her. A heavy exhale comes from her, her arms drop to her sides.

"Hey.. what's.. what's wrong?" Julianne asks quietly, leaning down so that our eyes meet. I see how soft hers are, concern easily shown. She's nervously nibbling on her swollen lip, waiting for me to reply to her. However, despite knowing she cares, I do not say a word to her. She notices my stubborn silence quickly, and her actions surprise me slightly. I guess her bold moves last night has brought alive a new found confidence inside of her.

She sits herself on my lap, letting her legs rest on the cushion to the right of me. Her arm slides around my neck, those small fingers are quick to tangle in my hair. "Hmm?" Her lips place a soft kiss against my temple, sending a spark to my cold heart.

"You look pale.. do-do you feel alright, honey?" She asks in a whisper, her other hand presses against my neck. Yet again, I remain mute. Part of me is screaming inside, begging to speak back to this beautiful girl. But the other, much stronger part has already decided that keeping my mouth shut is going to be the best thing for me.

"H-Harry?" Her voice is trembling, she's nervous. "D-did I.. I.. make you.. m-mad?" Julianne's fingers slow their movements in my hair, just as her other hand slides down to my chest, right over my heart. I can feel her warmth, even though she's much cooler than I am. Easily, my ears soak in the sound of her beating heart, her lungs taking in and letting out air, and even the small gulps she continuously swallows.

Julianne slouches down on my lap so that her mouth can be near my ear. "If-if you're.. w-worried about l-last night.. Harry.. you.. you were amazing. I promise." She mumbles, lips kissing my lobe a few times. Suddenly, a fire ignited in my stomach - the words fly out before I could even think.

"I don't want to fucking talk about last night. So shut the fuck up about it." I snap, making her flinch on top of me. Fear radiates from her now, I can sense it. She slides off my lap and onto the cushion beside me.

"I-I'm s-sorry." She stammered, anxiety washing through her I'm sure. I stand up from the couch, not wanting to even sit near her anymore. "I.. thought we.... we.." My hands form fists at my side, complete anger taking over me at this point. She stops talking, either from nervousness or from not knowing what the fuck to do anymore. "We aren't doing anything else. Ever." I turn around, my eyes staring straight through her.

Her lips part to let out words, but she's utterly speechless. "I'm not fuckin' doing anything with you again." My throat is burning, my veins feel like literal flames. It's coming, I need to get out of here before I phase. I've already hurt her once, I refuse to do it again. "Wh-what are you saying?" She asks, drawing her legs up, her feet on the edge of the couch. "I'm saying.." I take a second to breathe, this can't ever occur again. I can't ever let myself to that to her ever again. Now just isn't the time for us to be doing this. She's human.

"I don't want to have sex with you." It crushes me to say this, but it's what she needs to hear. This can't ever happen again, I can't hurt her like that ever again. It would literally kill me. "You-you don't w-want me?" She asks, her bottom lip starts to quiver uncontrollably - a sign that tears are about to be shed from her pretty eyes. Silence emerges from me, I have nothing else to say to her - nothing regarding this, at least.

Just as I wrap my hand around the door knob, I hear her footsteps quickly come up behind me. "Where the fuck are you going? You can't just fucking leave after saying that!" She screams out, her emotions heavy in her voice. "Watch me." I mumble, turning the knob and opening the door. Her hand grabs my wrist, trying to pull me back inside but she's not strong enough, she'll never be strong enough.

"Fuck off, Julianne. I have to hunt." I yank my arm free and carry myself off the porch. "Why are you doing this to me!" She yells out, sobbing laced in her words. I ignore her yet again, having no desire to tell her why. She should already know, we've discussed it before. "Every time something good happens to us you fucking ruin it! You suck the joy out of everything! I fucking hate you, Harry!"

Quickly I turn around, not caring about the streams going down her cheeks, or the way she's clutching her fists by her sides. She obviously hasn't saw herself this morning. "You're right! I do fucking ruin everything! Have you seen yourself? Have you looked in a god damn mirror, Julianne! I ruined you." My voice is just as loud as hers, with no intentions of lowering anytime soon. I face her yet again.

"What are you talking about?" She cries, furrowing her brows as she bites down on her shaking, frowning lip. "Go look in the mirror. Then you can tell me how you really feel about me." She still appears confused, perhaps I'm not being clear enough? "Go look in the mirror.. You can decide on whether you love me or not afterwards. I love you.. but I'm not going to have sex with you again."

My eyes witness the complete heartbreak she has - her face molds into a sadden, depressed expression. I swallow harshly, trying to fight back my own self destruction. My heart has broken, too. Without a word.. I trail off towards the woods - not caring about whether she's inside or not. The idea of keeping her safe and protected has fled from my mind. I need to fucking kill something, before I kill myself.


-


//Sophia//

I make it to their front door in record timing. I slam it shut accidentally - I'm very anxious at the moment. I have no idea what to expect. Harry must be so distracted by whatever is going on because earlier he forgot to block us from his inner thoughts. Niall insisted that I hurry over here as quick as possible.

When Harry started his hunt, however, he cut out off. There was a lot of commotion, everyone's thoughts flooding your mind can become overwhelming. I tried my hardest to focus on Harry's, but I couldn't really hear it clearly. All I know is that he and Julianne have had an argument, a very brutal one at that.

"Julianne?" I call out her name calmly, trying not to show my worry too much. It's rather difficult to pick up her scent because of Harry's lingering one. It's his job to cover her in his scent, he's the Alpha and her mate. I hear sniffling, gasps for air - both coming from upstairs. I hurry to the stairs, not sure about what to expect when I make my way up there.

It doesn't take but a few seconds for me to fly up the stairs, skipping a few hear and there.
When I get to the top, I come into the bedroom - it's destroyed. On the floor lies discarded clothes - I see the dress Julianne wore last night for their date, along with the rest of their things. I take a deep breath, the bed is an absolute wreck. The covers are bunched up, thrown off the side of the bed, and just messy. Harry likes for things to be neat, so something must be going on. The wooden headboard has a few cracks in it, as well as chunks taken out from the top - clearly you can tell someone's hand done it. Did they..?

"S-sophia?" I hear my name suddenly come from the bathroom. I ignore all those thoughts in my head and make a fast trip towards Julianne's location. When I open the door, I see her leaned against the bathtub - she's clutching a shirt to her chest. Other than that slight covering, she's bare. That's when it hits me.. I see it.

"J-julianne? Oh my god, what happened?" I kneel in front of her, pressing my hand to her swollen cheek. "I-I d-don't know.. I.. I.. don't know." She stutters out, tears dripping from her puffy eyes. "I- last night I-I didn't feel.. feel it.. Ev-everyth-thing was so p-perfect." She covers her mouth with her hand, trying to conceal her sobs. It hardly does her any good, though.

"Honey.." I breathe out when I take notice of her wrist. It's swollen and there's a purplish-red ring around it. "It.. it hurts." She tells me, extending her arm out so that I could examine the markings. "You might have a cracked bone." I mumble, being gentle as I rotate her arm, getting a nice look at it on all sides.

"He-he didn't mean to.. right?" She questions me, nervous to know the answer. "No babe, he didn't mean to do any of this." I assure her, sitting her arm down on her drawn up knees. Julianne's eyes drop down to her chest, the shirt she's holding is covering her breasts. But her collarbone, however, is showing. Bruises run all the way down her body, bite marks as well. There's blood smeared in a few places, swollen areas and yellowing edges of some of the bigger bruises are evident.

"Harry's.. very strong.. And.. and the whole wolf thing plays a part as well. I thought.. He told me, um, he told me that he wanted to wait. I.. I don't know why he.. he went through with it." She doesn't have to tell me what happened last night - I clearly know. The usual kissing and intimate things I'm aware they do never end up like this. They went all the way, and it's very shocking to me.

"It's my-my fault. I.. I made him. And now he.. he hates me.. he doesn't.. ever.. want to.. to touch me.. or have.. have sex.. with me.. again." She sobs out, leaning her body over so that her head hits my shoulder. I put my arms around her, holding her close to me. I know how he feels, I know how broken she is.

"Harry will want to touch you and have sex with you, honey, but.. but not now. You're still so fragile.. that's why he wanted to wait until he changed you. He isn't mad at you.. he's mad at himself." I tell her, rubbing the back of her head slowly.

She shakes her head, "No, no, no he hates me. He fucking hates me!" She whines, the heartbreak showing through her voice. "He doesn't." I whisper gently in her ear, this I know for sure. "He could never hate you, darling. He loves you with all of his heart.. he loves you more than he's ever loved anything before.. more than himself.. more than any of us.. He's hurt you, baby, that's why he's so upset. The last thing Harry's ever wanted to do was hurt you. Even if it was by accident."

My other hand is making circles on her back, trying to soothe her as much as I possibly can. Harry's arms would have a much greater effect on her. But sadly I know he won't return for a few hours. It's very likely that I'll have to stay here with her tonight.

"S-sophia.." She mutters my name, lifting herself off of me. I rest my hands over her elbows, keeping her balanced in front of me. "Yes?" She takes a deep breath, but her exhale is shakey. "Can-can you help me.. in the bath? I.. I.. my legs.. hurt." Julianne's eyes are silently pleading to me, asking for my help during this rough situation. It has to be hard, I just know it is. I feel so sorry for her, I wish things wouldn't have ended up this way.

"Of course, sweetheart. Here, stand up." When I get to my feet, I extend my hands down to her so she can take them. She gladly does, but I know it's going to be hard to pull her up - especially with her possibly broken wrist. "I-I can't." She huffs, dropping my hands. She presses the shirt over her nose and mouth, sobbing into it. I reach down to take it from her, but she jerks away. "No."

"C'mon, let's get you in the tub. I'll run you a nice warm bath." I insist, gently taking hold of the shirt. Yet again, she pulls away. "You're not getting this.. it's.. it's his." Julianne pouts, pressing the shirt to her nose again. I realize she wasn't trying to hide her crying - she's smelling it. "He's going to come back, honey. He hasn't left for good." I remind her. I'm sure she doesn't want to risk letting go of the only piece of him she currently has.

"He's never going to come back.. he hates me." The tears have stopped, but it's very apparent that she's still having a tough time. It's hard for her to breathe, mostly it's just gasping for air. "My.. my wrist didn't hurt.. earlier.. not this bad." She changes the topic, holding her arm out as I sit on my knees beside her. "I'm going to wrap it up when you get out of the shower. I can get someone to bring my medical bag over." I tell her, looking at her wrist again. Something's definitely cracked.

"Alright.. I'm going to need some help getting you up. I'm sure you're against Niall or Zayn seeing you without clothes on." I laugh gently, trying to lighten the mood. She smiles a little, making me feel like I'm doing a good job with her. I try my absolute best to help her whenever she needs it. Julianne and I talk a lot about everything under the sun.. We've become very close. Despite that.. there are somethings I just can't fix.

"I can.. I can ask Harry." I let the risky statement leave my mouth, instantly fearing her response. She shrugs, shakes her head lightly, and says, "He won't come so what does it matter.. Don't even bother trying." She's lost all hope in this. I wish she would just relax and accurately think about all of this. Harry loves her, he's going to come back.

"I'll ask him anyways.. It will be better if I had someone stronger to help since you're really weak right now. Alright?" I stand up, knowing that I need to take a few steps away in order to silence my mind. I need to break the Alpha barrier, I need to get into his head.

"I'll be right back." I say after a few moments of silence. She doesn't mind, because she thinks he won't come. I'll prove her wrong, I'll show her that he does love her - no matter what they go through, he's always going to love her.


Notes

decided to double update tonight, I didn't want to leave you guys hanging!

xx a good ole Sophia POV, i love it when I switch up the POV! I hope you like, just a few more chapters to go then the end comes!!! xxxx love you all so much x

Comments

@Allie Miller @Harry02
super sorry about just now replying to you guys! thank you for the love. I hope you like the new update ;)

Oh my god, the new chapters are amazing! Thank you for updating :)

Awesome updates my love :) Can't wait to see what's to come. Keep up the great work girl

Great new chapters! Can't wait to find out what's going to happen next :)