Thalia

I woke early, my eyes straining against the sunlight as the sound of birds filled my ears. We had left the balcony doors open wide last night to try and let some of the heat from the day escape knowing it would cost us our morning. But I didn't mind one bit for it was my favorite way to wake up.

Turning on my side I was instantly met with a snoring Marco. I glossed over his features that I had come to know so well in the past nine months we have been together. It's funny how time flies by so quickly, it seemed just yesterday he was pestering me about a first date at my gallery showing. I had been so shaken by his cool confidence and smooth comebacks that for a moment I had feared Harry had discovered the power to morph into others.

But, similar though they were, Harry and Marco proved to be very different. Marco had an air about him which demanded respect. Perhaps it was because he had never had to earn it, it had simply been given to him at birth. Every once in a while I would catch those dark brown eyes glaring menacingly at any who try to oppose him. His jaw would lock, clenching in anger as he fought for the proper words to diffuse the situation. That was where I came in. I, and many others, had noticed that my being around Marco had come as both a curse and a blessing. When I was around he was both easier to set off and easier to calm. A polar opposite than Harry.

I had often been told by Liam, Louis, Niall, and even Zayn at one point that Harry seemed more stable when we were together. Not that he was a raging lunatic the rest of the time, but simply that Harry's mood didn't seem to fluctuate as often when I was around. And perhaps this really was true seeing as Harry and Marco had gotten into a fucking fist fight yesterday. I mean seriously? I let out an angry huff at the memory.

"What's that frown for?"

I blinked as Marco's lazy Italian accent broke through my thoughts. I hadn't even realized he had awoken and was staring back at me.

"Just thinking about your little brawl with Harry yesterday."

Now it was Marco's turn to huff. He let out a great sigh, his cheeks hallowing as he blew out the air.

"You never told me what happened."

"Harry's psychotic that's what happened," he snapped.

I watched him run his hand through his dark locks, annoyed that I was bringing this up again. He wanted me to drop it but we both knew that wasn't going to happen.

"Harry's a lot of things but he's not psychotic. He wouldn't hurt a fly."

Marco rolled his eyes. "Well how do you explain him attacking me then?"

"I can't," I shrugged. Marco turned to look at me as I rolled onto him, resting my chin on his chest. "But you can if you told me what really happened."

"I told you everyth-"

This time it was me who rolled their eyes. Marco wasn't telling me the truth. Or if he was then he wasn't telling me the whole story. I quickly got off Marco and jumped from the bed, padding softly over to the dresser.

"Thalia, where are you going?"

"On a run."

"A run? You never run."

"I do too!" I cried, before adding quietly to myself. "Just not very often."

"Thalia," Marco whined. "Come back to bed."

I ignored him and continued rummaging around my luggage until I found my shoes. I was actually surprised I remembered to bring them cause, let's face it, I didn't really run. On the rare occasion that I did it was only because I was stressed and needed to let out some pent up energy.

"It's going to rain."

"Then I'll get wet." I heard shuffling about the room and quickened my pace to change. I had just managed to pull on my sports bra when I felt two muscular arms snake their way around my waists.

"Amore." Marco's grip tightened as his soft lips found there way to the back of my neck mumbling, "come back to bed. Please?"

"Marco-"

With two strong hands he spun me around so I was facing him and before I had the chance to argue his lips were on mine. The kiss was forceful and full of wanting for something I didn't have. I quickly pushed back on his chest, separating us as I tried to catch my breath.

"What?" He spat as I stared at him, completely stunned. "My kisses aren't good enough for you anymore?"

I didn't know what to say, how to respond to these attacks. I ended up sputtering out, "I'm still angry with you Marco."

Marco rolled his eyes dramatically as he let out an exasperated sigh. But rather than repelling him, my words only made him move closer. "I told you I'm sorry Thalia. What else is there to do?"

I watched him, my lips tight with annoyance as his hands returned to my waist and his gaze traveled downwards. I suddenly felt violated. His eyes were raking over my exposed skin possessively as if he was a lion who had just caught his prey. The thought sickened me.

"Let me make it up to you," he whispered. His fingers crept lower on my sides until they faas he dipped down to latch his mouth on my neck.

I immediately ducked down and slipped from his grasp before quickly pulling t-shirt down over my exposed torso. "You can later. Right now I'm going on a run."

Marco let out a loud groan in indignation before I snapped the door shut behind me. I quickly moved throughout throughout the house, thankful the heavy doors and thick walls absorbed my footsteps so as not to give my presence away. It was nearly five in the morning and the sun had just managed to creep over top of the cliff, allowing light to stream in through the windows and cloak the rooms with light. It was peaceful and for a moment I cherished the stillness of the space, that was, until thoughts of Harry and Marco began to creep up the back of my mind. I quickly opened the door and set off at a fast pace, hoping to outrun my mind.

I abruptly turned towards the garden path, remembering Marco's earlier warnings not to wander too close to the cliff due to unsteady ground. I had rolled my eyes at his overprotective was at the time yet still found myself wary of the area. Though running along the cliff had its allure, the 20 meter drop was enough to send me scampering towards the gardens. And it wasn't as though I minded the gardens, they were easily my favorite spot on the whole estate. They were the only place it seemed I could hide. Hide from Marco, from Harry and from the weight of the problems which both seemed to bring. Before Harry my life had never been this dramatic, and I briefly wondered what on earth I had done to deserve it. I was a nobody. Just a troubled girl from Birmingham who suddenly found herself caught in a love triangle between an Italian millionaire and an international pop star.

I looked around frantically, suddenly feeling like Truman Burbank from "the Truman Show", a movie where the main character discovers his entire life is actually just T.V. show. It honestly wouldn't surprise me, in fact, I almost hoped that was the case for it seemed easier to deal with than the real thing itself. Because let's face it, I was caught in a love triangle. A love triangle I had no idea how to escape from.

On one hand I had the alluring, self-satisfying Italian millionaire. The one who seemed to be constantly at her side showering, and often suffocating, her with adoration, gifts, and kisses. But Marco was also the one who lied. He was the one who avoided her questions and mumbled incoherent excuses when accused of doing anything remotely compromising. Marco had yet to tell her what really happened the other night at the club and intervened whenever she attempted to ask anyone else.
Then on the other hand there was Harry. Harry who I have enough history with to write a textbook. Harry who I fought with, broke up with, and ran away from. Harry who, despite my efforts, still managed to make my heart race when he broke into that beautifully dimpled smile of his.

I picked up my pace, angry at myself for falling into his trap within three bloody weeks of being back in his presence. Looking down at my watch, I realized I had been running for nearly forty minutes now yet for some reason I felt as aggravated as ever. One more lap wouldn't hurt. I rounded the corner on the last hedge and-

"Ahh!"

I let out a scream as I collided with something solid. The blow caused me to loose my balance as gravity pulled me down it what was sure to be a painful collision against the gravel. However a strong arm wrapped around my waist and pulled me back back up to safety.

"Thal?"

I blinked, realizing that I was now face to face with Harry Styles. His bright green eyes were mere inches from mine. They scanned mine as his lips curved up into his iconic smile.

"You alright?" Harry chucked, his deep voice breaking through her racing thoughts.

"You know you should really watch where you're going," I managed, arching my eyebrow accusingly.

"Well you didn't give me much of a chance there did you Flash?" He teased.

“I guess not,” I breathed, my chest rising and falling. "Harry?”

“Yes?”

“You can let go now.”

He blinked before realizing that he still had his arms wrapped protectively around my waist. “Oh! Shit. Sorry Thalia.”

I didn’t respond. Instead, I took a few steps back and allowed myself to breathe properly again. My chest had constricted, though I wasn’t sure yet if the cause was due to running or to running into Harry.

“W-what are you doing out here so early?” He asked, shifting his feet and running his hands through his hair awkwardly.
I looked up at him with raised eyebrows. “Well I was running…”

“Right! Right…of course,” Harry laughed. But it was higher pitched and nothing remotely similar to his normally deep, body shaking laugh. The sound caused me to pause.

“What about you?” I asked in what I hoped was a more casual tone than his attempt. “I know you’re an early bird but it’s six in the morning.”

“Couldn’t sleep,” he shrugged.

A painfully long silence followed in which we both shuffled uncomfortably, neither looking at the other or knowing what to say.
“Right. Well, I’m uh…I’m going to keep going. I’ll catch you late-“

“Wait Thalia!” Harry cried, catching my arm as I started past him. For a moment he looked surprised at his actions, but his desperation quickly overrode any hesitation. “I need to talk to you.”

“Harry-“

“Please. It’s about the other night at the club, you deserve to know the whole story.”

I licked my lips nervously as my eyes flickered between his. I wanted to know, I really did. I just wasn’t sure if I wanted Harry to be the one to tell me. But wasn’t the reason I was here running in the garden because Marco refused to tell me the truth yet again? I took a deep breath in attempt to summon my courage before giving Harry a nod.

“Alright, you’ve caught my interest. Go on…”

Harry suddenly looked panicked, as though he hadn’t expected me to actually agree to listen. “Well uh, you and Marco had been arguing all night remember?”

“Yeah.” I nodded as an image of Marco angrily throwing himself against the alleyway wall emerged in my mind.

“Well when we got to the club we drank a bit more - obviously. And you wanted to go dance with your sisters. Marco wasn’t happy about it but you being you, went anyway…”

“Of course,” I replied stubbornly, earning half a smirk from Harry.

“Well I joined you all after a bit and we threw down some absolutely horrendous dance moves.” He broke into a small laugh which I couldn’t help but join him in, remembering all the clubbing experiences we’d had together as a couple and easily imagining the scene. However as I looked back at Harry I realized he had stopped laughing. His eyes had darkened and is fingers balled into fists. “Yeah but then this creep started grinding on you…I shut that down.”

“Tell me you didn’t hit him.”

This had the desired effect of bringing a smile back to Harry’s face. “No. I wish - just kidding! Kind of…”

“What happened next?” I asked with a sigh, pretending his comment hadn't lighten my mood.

“You were kind of spooked and wanted to go find Marco. Of course by that time you had drank way too much and were a bit wobbly so I, being the gentleman I am-“

I snorted. Harry shot me a look and I felt the need to retaliate with, “The same gentleman who kissed an incoherent drunken ex a few minutes later?”

“You’re interrupting the story,” He replied cooly, though the hurt was evident in his eyes.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"Anyway, we made it back to the table and...well I saw before you did and I tried to stop you but you ran in there anyway." Harry ran his hand through his hair and looked up at me with pained eyes. After a large sigh he finally admitted, "Thal, Marco cheated."

I stared at Harry dumbstruck as a sharp pain punctured my chest. My breath hitched as Harry continued.

"She was an old friend, Nicola mentioned they had some history...I'm so sorry Thal, I tried to tell you yesterday But I was scared you wouldn't believe me. And I know that's a shit excuse. But ask Maeve and Kenzie of you don't believe me-"

This snapped me back to reality and I looked up at Harry incredulously. "They knew? They knew all along and never told me?"
"Well not exactly. They didn't actually see it happen but they remember you talking about it later that night-"

"And when exactly were you planning on letting me in on this little secret? Seeing as it's my fucking life that's being affected by it!"

"I told you, I tried to tell you yesterday."

"Why didn't you just tell me that morning?" I snapped.

"Because...fuck Thalia I wasn't even sure what had happened!" Harry sat down on a nearby bench and ran his hands through his disheveled hair once more as he chewed his lip. I knew that look. He was holding something back, something he knew I wouldn't want to hear. But what could be worse then the news my boyfriend had been cheating?

"What do you mean you weren't sure what happened?" I asked hesitantly. "You weren't sure he cheated?"

"No," snapped Harry. "I knew he had cheated. I just...look, I blacked out too Thal, but not until later."

"Until after you kissed me?"

Harry shifted uncomfortably before meeting my eye. "Yeah. We kiss and then everything goes black until the next morning. I...I just wanted to make sure I got all my facts straight before I dropped something like that on you."

I didn't know how to respond. How do you respond to you ex telling you that, despite your best efforts, you've found a man who is worse then they are? I looked back up to the house, immediately spotting Marco's window in the distance.

"Hang on Thal, where are you going?" Harry called, his voice breaking through my thoughts and causing me to pause.

"I'm going to go see what Marco has to say for himself," I replied. "I need to hear his side-"

“Thalia. You can’t honestly be thinking of going back to him!”

"I'm not going to rush to judgment based on hearsay," I snapped.

"Oh right, cause you've never done that before," Harry replied sarcastically, his mouth curling in disgust. "Why so lenient on him, huh?

"It's different."

"How?" He growled.

"Because my only proof is your word!"

"That's all it was last time and you didn't hesitate then!" Argued Harry, rising to his feet in protest.

"But this time I'm at fault too. How can I judge him for cheating when I turned around and did the same thing?"

"Are you insane? Stop trying to rationalize him. You did not cheat Thalia!"

"I kissed you!"

"No. I kissed you! And even if that wasn't the case anything you did was null since he cheated first!"

I glared at him, anger flooding my veins. "That is not how the world works Harry! Besides, shouldn't you be defending his actions? Seeing as you two have more in common than you think."

His face grew pale and I could see his eyes growing glossy as he struggled to hold back tears. However, I found myself very unsympathetic. Had he seriously not realized what he had done? What he had turned me into?

"I never-" he whispered, his voice hoarse. He tried to take my hand but I pulled back.

"Save it."

"No. No, you need to hear this!" He cried, his voice rising as he pointed a threatening finger at me. "You were shutting me out Thal. You were hiding things and I thought...I thought that meant you didn't love me anymore."

I opened my mouth but before I could so much as utter a sound he cut me off again.

"Why didn't you tell me about Maeve?"

"I-what?"

About Maeve hurting herself. Why didn't you tell me Thal? I would have understood, I would have helped you."

I began shaking my head, slow at first before it turned into some sort of panic, as though I was trying to stop his words from reaching my ears. My mind seemed to be moving a million miles and second, yet frozen in shock at the same time. How on earth had he found out about Maeve? She was my sister, my burden. He hadn't needed to get involved in that. He had had enough stress about the tour, the guys, and his music to worry about that.

"I was wrong Thalia. I was so, so wrong. I should have just listened to you, I should have been there for you. Instead I rushed to my own idiotic conclusion."

He was nearer now. I could feel the heat emanating from his body as I stared down at the gravel which had suddenly become immensity intriguing.

"I know I have no right to ask." His voice caught and immediately squeezed my eyes shut in attempt to block out the image of a crying Harry from my brain. "But please, please forgive me. You have no idea how much I regret that day...regret not running after you the moment that door closed."

My arms tightened around my middle, my nails biting angrily into my skin, as if the moment I would let go I would crumble. The lump that had formed in my throat was steadily growing worse as I tried to contain what would surely be body wracking sobs. I wanted, needed him to stop before I broke down entirely.

"I tried to call you. I went to your apartment the next day and you were gone. No one would tell me where you were," he continued as I let out a small whimper.

He hadn't known because I hadn't told anyone. Maeve was the only one who knew where I had gone and I had sworn her to secrecy before stuffing everything I could into a duffle bag and heading off. I had seen the texts. I had ignored the calls. My anger and hatred for Harry had made it easy then. But now, now it was impossible to shut him out with him bearing down on me.

"I thought I'd never see you again and that...that killed me Thal." Harry's deep voice whispered. I felt his fingers brush my arms before he took hold of them lightly. “And then, out of nowhere you were standing in front of me again at the ball. Do you remember? You looked so breathtakingly beautiful I thought it was a dream at first."

"Stop," I protested weakly. But Harry only gripped me tighter.

"That was fate Thalia. It had to be. Because the moment I saw you, every feeling I had been trying to fight for the past year came rushing back."

"Harry listen to yourself!" I finally burst. "It's not fate it's-"

"I don't give a damn what it is Thalia. Now I know-" he took my chin and lifted my eyes to meet his. "I know I've made mistakes Thalia but I want-I want-"

"You want what?" I asked, my voice hoarse but still much stronger than expected. "For me to break up with Marco?”

“I want a chance to prove to you that I can be that person you thought I was. Please Thalia. I want to wake up next to you everyday just like we used to, I want to hear you hum while you make breakfast and scowl when your toast burns. I want sit by and watch you slowly coat yourself with paint like a messy two year old as you work on your next masterpiece. I want you to laugh because of some stupid joke that I only would think is hilarious. I want you to…I want you to love me again Thalia.”

The words hung in the air as I we stared at each other. It was if I couldn't breathe, as if those last words had choked what little I had left. I tried to wrap my mind around what he was saying. Surely he must be delusional. But as I looked up into those piercing green eyes I realized he was completely serious.

And suddenly white hot anger flashed through my veins. How could he say such things? How could he possibly think that I could open myself up to that kind of pain again?

“And I wanted to trust you…but how can I?” I replied, my voice think from the unfallen tears.

Harry ran his hands through his, now thoroughly, disheveled hair. He was biting his lip to keep from letting out a sob we both knew was only moments away.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, taking my hand gently in his. It was like electricity on my skin and I couldn’t decide if I wanted to move closer or jump back. He reached up and pushed a strand of hair behind my ear, whispering, “Thalia I’m so sorry…please. I-I love you. I’ll always love you...”

That brought me back to my senses. I pushed myself away from him, effectively running into a tree which I then used it to steady myself. “No. No you don’t get to do this. Not again. You do not just get to come waltzing back in to my life and say those three magic words and expect everything to be alright.”

“Thal-“

“Why?” I yelled, growing hysterical. This was too much for any one person to handle. “Why now? Why at all? I was happy Harry!"

“Thalia plea-“

“No. I’m done. I moved on with my life and maybe it's time you did too.”

He tried to reach out once more but I was gone, sprinting through the trees as fast as my legs would carry me. I needed to get away. Away from Harry and all his sweet words and kind smiles. Away from his touches that would, the moment he made contact, crumble my resolve.

Why, why was he doing this? Why now? This had been something I'd overcome. Why did he have bring this up again? I was so tired of thinking about him. Of hearing his voice and imagining his touch. I was so sick his let downs and broken promises.
A tightness in my chest which has nothing to do with running was growing rapidly in my chest. It was as if I couldn't breathe. My vision had vanished behind a curtain of blurred shapes bed figures as the back of my eyes burned furiously. I wiped angry tears from my eyes as I reached the cliff and collapsed on the nearest stone. My throat seemed to close momentarily before loud, uncontrollable sobs wracked my body. A shooting pain shot through every muscle in my body and for a moment I was convinced I was breaking. I tried to grab hold of something, anything, but my scared, shaking hands were useless. It felt as if the world was rushing at me. Every noise became deafening and it made my head swim. I wanted it to stop. I wanted everything to stop.

Notes

I CAN FORMAT AGAIN! So pumped. Also hope you liked the chapter! Thalia and Harry are FINALLY having that conversation..though it seems it didn't go as well as Harry hoped.

PS get ready for all the feels in this next chapter