* Flashback *

“Toooootles,” Harry sang into the phone. I smiled at his nickname for me and flopped down onto the empty bed to talk.

“Why hello Walt. How’s life?”

“Little better now that I’m talking to you. Hey what are you doing on Thursday?”

“Why?” I frowned. I began playing with the ends of my hair out of boredom.

“Sophia’s coming out to visit! You should come! We could get a room on the ocean, make a weekend of it…”

“That sounds amazing,” I sighed. “But I have to work on my project this weekend."

“Project? I thought you were done with it,” he groaned. "You can’t even escape for a little bit?”

“My piece was chosen for that gallery,” I replied, a smile crossing my face in pride. “But there’s a few things I have to tweak before it goes up so-.”

“Why? You deserve a break. Besides, if it’s been chosen for a gallery why do you need to change it? Riddle me that if you will.”

I rolled my eyes. “Because it’s my senior project. It has to be perfect!”

“I’m sure it is love.”

“It’s almost perfect. That’s what I need this weekend for.”

“Okay but your almost perfect means it’s already beyond everyone else’s perfect,” he argued playfully. “So why not take a break, visit your favorite lad in LA and give everyone else a chance to catch up.”

“Harry…”

“Please Thalia,” He begged.

“It’s not just my project though. I have to work-“

“Get someone to cover.”

“There is no one to cover. I've already picked up another shift to cover for someone else!”

“Come on Thal, I haven’t seen you in months.”

“Two. It’s been two months.”

“Two months too long. Please.”

“Harry I can’t, I’m sorry.”

There was silence on the other end before he mutter, “Fine. I should have known.”

I closed my eyes and bit my tongue. He was mad, no disappointed was a better word, that I wouldn’t be coming out to visit yet again. This was the third time he had asked me in the past two months and the third time I’ve had to tell him no. Maybe if he would give me more of a heads up I would actually be able to get the time off in advance.

“I promise next time-"

“You always say next time,” Harry whined.

“Not everyone has such an amazing job as you Haz,” I reminded him. He didn’t respond so I let out a sigh, “I’m sorry Harry, I really am. But I can’t just drop everything. I need to stay and work on my project for school and I need to stay and work for the money.”

“Thal, I told you I would help you pay for school so you wouldn’t have to work so much,” Harry argued. "And you’re living at my house right now! That’s food and rent covered too!”

“Harry I told you I didn’t need help paying for school. I can do it fine on my own.” I didn’t mention that I wasn’t letting Helen, the maid, buy the groceries like he had wanted but that might set him over the edge. Truth was I hated living off of Harry’s wealth, especially when he wasn’t here.

“Just because I don’t have to doesn’t mean I’m not going to,” He replied a bit harsher than I think he meant to. “I thought if you didn’t have to work as much I would get to see you a bit more.”

“I know but Harry, it’s not just work that’s the issue,” I replied. “I have school too. Last time you asked me to fly to Australia on a Tuesday!”

“We don’t get normal days off Thal,” He cried out.

“I know you don’t but-“

“Look, I gotta go,” he cut in. “I’ll talk to you later.”

“Bye I lo—” but he had already hung up.

I threw my on on the bed angrily. I hated when we ended a conversation on a bad note. I grabbed the nearest pillow and screamed into it like a child throwing a tantrum. I hated this. I hated this empty house. I hated the quietness of it. I hated the fact that everything in it reminded me that Harry wasn’t here.

I needed to get out of this prison. I jumped up and skipped to the closet, rifling through until I found something to wear.
I’ve lost count of how many times we’ve disagreed
But it’s the third time
we’ve fought together this week
Maybe it’s nothing
maybe I just need
time on my own
Just once,
I’m gonna go and get drunk

I hummed to myself as I pulled on my little black dress. I slipped on my shoes, grabbed my purse and headed out the front door. A drink was exactly what I needed right now. I had been alone in that house for too long. I don’t know what I was expecting - for Harry just to show up for a surprise visit one day? He hadn’t done that since December. It was now March.

But what had he expected? For me to just drop everything in my life for a day to ease his loneliness? Sure he was on tour, but he got days off too. Maybe if he'd actually paid attention to tour dates we could have arranged times to meet so we wouldn't be stuck on opposite sides of the planet. This was not all my fault here...it's a two way street Harry.

I kept replaying our last argument as I sat on the subway, paying no attention to my surroundings. I didn’t know what to do. I loved Harry with all my heart but I just wasn’t sure it that was enough anymore. Still deep in thought, I pushed open the door to the bar and found a group of friends already sitting in the back corner.

If you get my name wrong
I won’t get pissed off cause
I wish I was somebody else
You know nothing about me,
I know nothing about you
But maybe the question mark helps
Have you ever been lost?
We could get lost
I wanna get lost
-

“Fuck. Thalia!”

I let out a groan and leaned my head back against the cold stone wall. I felt two strong arms wrap around my body and suddenly I was floating.

“Thalia. Wake up babe.”

“Shhh! You’re so loud,” I whined.

“God damn it Thalia. Are you out of your mind?” Calhan hissed. Nothing like an ex boyfriend saving you from a drunken mistake.

We were outside now. I could hear the honking of the traffic and occasional siren. A second later I was set down on something soft and cold.

“Where are we?” I mumbled.

“I’m taking you home,” replied Calhan. I heard him start talking to someone else and assumed we were in a taxi. My head felt like it was splitting open and I struggled to keep from vomiting. What felt like a second later I was being carried again.

“Shit. Where are your keys?” He whispered. I took the bag from him and began digging around slowly before holding the keys up front him.

“It was hiding,” I giggled.

“Come on,” He rolled his eyes and guided me upstairs to our flat.

“Oh shit!” I cried as I nearly tripped on a step.

“Shh, quiet Thalia.”

“Shh."

"Thalia shh.”

"Shhh!" I held my finger to my lips before giggling once more. Calhan scooped me up and brought me inside my…well it wasn’t really my flat anymore now that I lived with Harry. I missed this place.

I suddenly burst into tears and Calhan immediately tried to shush me. He set me down gently on the couch and wrapped a blanket around my shoulders.

“Come on babe, why are you crying?” He half laughed at me. I’m sure I looked like a train wreck, drunk and sobbing on my couch.

“I just r-really m-miss this ap-partment,” I hiccuped. Calhan ran to grab me a glass of water and after a few sips I began to calm down some.

“But weren’t you just here this morning?” He asked with a chuckle, gently pushing my hair out of my face.

“N-no. I don’t l-live here anym-more,” I whispered. I could feel more tears slip down my cheeks but I was too drunk and sad to care. “It’s so q-quite at Harry’s. I get so l-lonely.”

“Hey now, don’t cry Thal. Can’t you just stay here with your friends while he’s away?”

“He wanted me to stay at his place so I don’t have to worry money. But then he's mad when I told him I didn’t want him paying for everything.”

I burst into new tears and Calhan pulled me into a hug. Drunk me was pathetic.
“He’s just trying to look out for you Thal.”

“Yeah well he’s doing a shit job of it.”

“I noticed,” Calhan replied dryly. “Were you planning on going home with one of those guys at the bar tonight Thalia?”

“NO!”

Calhan clapped a hand over my mouth so I wouldn’t wake my three best friends who lived here.

“I just wanted to have fun and drink a little bit,” I replied, once he had moved his hand. “I only had two drinks I don’t…”

“I think they drugged you Thal.”

“Well that was rude of them!”

“Shh.”

“Fuck.” I let my head fall on Calhan’s shoulder. My eyes were growing heavy and my head was spinning from tonights events.

“Thalia…have you told Harry how sad you are?”

“I’m not sad.”

“You’re crying.”

“I’m drunk.”

“Thalia…”

“I...I don’t want to worry him.”

“But it’s eating you alive. Come on I’ve never seen you like this before,” He pressed. “You told me Harry was better for you remember? Now look who’s gone and who’s here.”

“Calhan,” I whined. “Please can we not do this right now.”

Calhan and I had broken up when I met Harry and for a while he had been hell bound on getting me back. To say that Calhan and Harry didn't like each other was an understatement. However we had talked it out and Calhan's returned to being one of my best friends. His talk may sound like he wants to get back together, but he knows it’s the only way I’ll listen to him.

“I’m just saying Thalia. You never smile anymore - never your real smile. What happened?”

“I don’t think he loves me anymore.”

The words hung in the air, suffocating me and eating me alive. I don’t know why I had said it, but once I did, I knew they were true.

Notes

As promised! Here's a little glimpse into why our favorite couple broke up - but don't worry! There are plenty more flashbacks to come. For now however, any thoughts?

Ciao ciao!