Written in These Walls

I slide into the drivers seat and familiarize myself with everything and somewhat aquaint myself with the awkwardness of driving from a different side that what I am used to. I shake off the nervousness and decide to get going.
"Left side, left side" I keep telling myself, laughing at how I must look as people pass me. I listen carefully as my GPS tells me where to turn. This shouldnt take too long but I'm in it for the discovery and not on a time schedule so I look forward to maybe making some stops along the way in the small towns I come across.

I find myself slowing down at sights along the road, animals grazing in peaceful fields, children running along without a care in the world. Everything at a much slower pace than back home, even from the rural community I live in, just slower, more relaxed.
Its a gorgeous day, much better than the previous days that was nothing but rain and more rain. Its somewhat crisp but the sun warms you nicely.
I watch as tall grasses lean from side to side along the road side from the light wind and decide to pull over and just enjoy the beauty of it all.

I turn off the car and lean up against the car breathing in the fresh air, letting the sun beat down on my face and listening as the wind blows through some trees just off the road.

Yes, this is what I am looking for, a cleanse. Remove everything that has been weighing me down, getting rid of whatever it is that is keeping me in the rut I keep falling into. I take some deep breaths in and slowly release them and repeat this a few times, eyes closed, just thinking about all the good this is going to do me. After about the fifth release I open my eyes just as another car is about to pass. It slows down and the driver asks if everything is fine. I respond with fine, a smile and they are on their way. I notice the expensive make of the car and figure its someone who has an estate nearby hidden in all the trees or far off the road so no one can see. I've spent enough time relaxing so I decide to continue on and see some more.

I come to a fork in the road and notice a sign labeled and pointing to a small town, the opposite direction is where I should be headed. I look at my watch and decide I had best head towards my destination. All the driving slowly and stopping to look has caught up with me. If I'm to make it to the castle by dinner, I had best keep to my plans.

As I make my way around a curve in the narrow road I look up and see the castle sitting up on the hill and I almost stop in the middle of the road. Its breathtaking. The mere size of it and all its old glory there perched onthe side of a mountain for all to see. I drive slowly taking in the garden along the way and stop at the gatehouse for my instructions.

I am pointed which way to go and where someone will take my car. I drive in awe at the trees, flowers and bushes. Everything complimenting each other whether in color, shape or size.

I pull up to the front and I'm met by a well dressed young man who helps me with my things while another takes my car. I am walked in and immediately stop upon entering. It is more than I could have imagined. The vastness and beauty was not done justice in the pictures I had seen. Its as if I have stepped back in time. I am brought back to current times by the young man clearing his throat at me to continue. I apologize and quickly catch up to him. I am shown my room and told of the ammenities at my disposal. He alerts me to the time when dinner will be served and if I would like to join the other guests. As he moves a few things around in the room he mentions a wedding will be preformed here this weekend and all but 3 guests, myself included, are there for the wedding. I stand and watch as he finishes, turns and asks if I have any questions. I answer with, "No, thank you." he turns and leaves.

I turn and walk around the room, taking it all in. Its a little much for my taste but wasnt everything during that time? Everything over and above. I unpack my things and put them into drawers, watching the time. I decide to head down to the dining room early so I can look around as I walk down.

I step into the the dining hall and I'm met with welcoming looks from the other guests. I am motioned to a chair and take a seat as it is pulled out for me. No one is yet seated next to me so I start a friendly chat with the girl across the table from me, who is here for the wedding. Just as the first course is about to be served the chair next to me is pulled back and I notice a man about my age is seated next me. I look up only slightly just to notice his clothing, which beckons me to look up more. Our eyes meet and I instantly look away, its as if they were looking for my soul. We exchange a friendly hello as our soup is placed in front of us.

The urge to look at him again is almost more than I can control. I try to steal glances out of my peripheral vision though scared he will see me trying to get a look.

"What kind of soup did they say this was?" he asks quietly almost inaudible.
"I dont know that they said." I answer back.
We both laugh quietly trying not to slurp or clink our ustensils too loudly on the bowl. We make small talk the rest of the meal about the food or the decor around us. By the end of the meal weve become more comfortable with each other and speak of nothing more than the weather and the older gentleman who is having trouble staying awake during the meal. After the dessert, he helps me by pulling out my chair for me and introduces himself with and out sctretched hand.
"Zayn. Nice to meet you."
"Ireland, the pleasure is all mine."
I look up at him and meet the eyes again. Yes, it was my soul they were looking for and I have drowned in them. I snap myself back to reality before I give myself away, but I'm sure my smile betrayed me, it reached from ear to ear. Though, if I'm not mistaken, his did the same. We walk to the door of the room together and then turn and go our seperate ways. I notice he is heading towards the front, while I had decided to wander about the castle.

I walk down halls and peak into rooms, looking at artifacts and pictures of famous occupants and guests. I get a chill and remember reading how the castle was a bit drafty and remind myself to ask for an extra blanket if one is available.

I decide after wandering around about an hour to head back up to my room. I find one of the ladies who is employed at the castle and ask about an extra blanket, she assures me she will have one brought to my room.

I open my bag and find my journal and make notes about the day. I write about the scenery and just relaxed I am and how at ease I feel, peaceful. A knock at the door interrupts my writing and I welcome them in, its the same lady, a large blanket on her arm. I take it from her and thank her as she steps back out.

After placing the blanket on the bed, I decide to venture out into the hall for a few minutes before retiring to bed. I look at the art and pictures of royalty perched on horses going off into battle or a fox hunt.

I get so engrossed in a painting so that I dont realize someone has joined me and almost step on them as I move down the hall. After awkward excuse me's and laughing, I notice it is Zayn. I look up at him as he is speaking and realize who he is. Why had I not seen it earlier? I maintain my cool and act the same as I had prior to recognizing him.
I know a little about him, but seeing him on this level is different. It makes him almost human, less god-like, well, aside from the amazing good looks, but none the less, human.

I snap myself back into reality and continue to listen to him talk about the painting as art, aside from who is in the painting or what the painting is about. I watch him as he steps closer as if inspecting the brush strokes. I notice the urge to touch the painting is almost too much for him and he puts his hands into his pockets, controlling them. I have lost all interest in the painting and have focused my attention on him, the painting has him intranced. I watch him. I try to figure out what has caught his attention. Is it the colors used, the brush strokes, the effort put forth in the details, or the painting itself?

He steps back and eyes the painting as a whole.

"Nice seeing you again, maybe I'll see you tomorrow. Have a good evening."

He turns and leaves. He is gone a quickly as he arrived.

I make my way back to my room, somewhat unsure of what just happened. I look up as I get to my room, unlock my door and enter. I'm starting to feel just how tired I am. I lay the extra blanket over the bed, get changed into my pajamas, and climb in.

I hardly have any time for reflection of tonight before my eyes close and I'm asleep.
I dream of all I had seen through out the day. I feel as though I am riding along in the car, the bumps and turns, I feel them all. As I drift deeper I feel the peacefulness envelope me and how my life has come full circle. I am here. This is where I was supposed to come and find myself. I feel my body start to relax more and give in to it.

Notes

Ta-Dah