Descendants.

I managed to escape the pub a couple of minutes later, with only a few crass jokes from the girls. I wasn’t quite as smooth trying to get out as I had hoped. Heather had seen the altercation between Harry and me, and although she was vocal about the fact that I shouldn’t let him push me around, she told me that she’d be high tailing it out of there just as fast if he was willing to jump into her bed. And besides, I’d let her know that he wasn’t pushing me around in any way that I didn’t completely and utterly enjoy.

My nervous energy bounced around the cab the entire ride back to my flat. It wasn’t as easy to convince myself that what I was doing was okay when I was 85% sober. Last time, I’d needed all those drinks as my safety net. If I didn’t remember what happened, would I still be held responsible?

Unlocking the front door, I flipped on the light in the kitchen as soon as I walked inside. The space was small, but it was more than enough for me. The kitchen was cramped, the living room an odd ‘L’ shape, and there was just one bedroom, but I had immediately felt at home here.

I had just finished throwing some clothes I’d left lying around into the clothes hamper when I heard a soft knock on the front door. Taking a deep breath to steady myself, I pulled open the door, motioning for him to come in before I shut and locked the it behind him.

“Are you still angry at me?” I asked, boldly. Taking his coat from him, I threw it over the back of one of the kitchen chairs, waiting for his answer. He sighed, running his hands through his messy curls. He looked torn, weighing what he was about to say very carefully.

“I stopped being angry awhile ago.” He began. I started to reply, when he held up his hand to stop me. “I’m not done.” He started pacing in the space between the back of the couch and the front door, where my feet were still glued.

“I don’t get told ‘no’ very often, Blair.” He admitted. “And even though I was done being angry at you for the last – “ he paused “ – incident, the second you told me you weren’t coming over because you were busy, I lost my cool. I found the first willing participant and tried to forget that I didn’t want her blonde hair hanging over my face when she kissed me.”

“I’m not just always going to drop everything and come running the minute you get back into town.”

“I thought you wanted this, too.” He stopped pacing, confusion etching his facial features

“I do. But not just on your terms, Harry. You can’t treat me like I’m an object that you own, instead of a human being. I like that you’re a little rough around the edges when it comes to what we’re doing here, but you can’t push me around in public just because I told you what you didn’t want to hear.” I stood in front of him, watching as he took in the words I’d so desperately needed him to grasp. “If you need to push me around to get off, you do it in private.”

“Is this because I didn’t call you when we were away?” He asked, quietly.

“I didn’t expect you to.” I told him, honestly. “I’m not kidding myself into thinking this is something more than it is. There are so many reasons why anything other than fuck buddies is a bad idea.”

“Liam?”

I nodded. “Liam, for one.”

“And what are the other reasons?” His voice was gaining some volume. “Because if Liam is the only valid reason we’re not giving this an honest shot, I’ll call him and fill him in right now.”

I sighed and shut my eyes tight. I didn’t want to get into this. How do you tell a boy, who your body responds to without your permission, that it isn’t that you’re not looking for something more serious. You’re just not looking for something with him.

I grabbed a fist full of his t-shirt, pulling him so close that not even an inch of air separated us. Standing on my toes, I pressed my lips to his in an effort to distract him from the conversation at hand. He put his hands on my shoulders, pushing me away enough to look down at me as he pulled his bottom lip in between his teeth.

“Answer me, Blair.” He begged, softly.

I didn’t have the answers. At least, not the ones that he wanted.

“I don’t want anything more than this right now. I’m just getting my feet wet in this place, with the new job and new friends, and I don’t want to have to worry about checking in with someone or asking permission to do anything, at all.”

“We’re leaving on tour soon.” He argued. “You wouldn’t have to check in or ask permission for anything, because I wouldn’t be here.”

“And what on earth makes you think that’s a better option? I’ve been left behind at every stage of my life.” I could feel the tears start to form behind my eyelids. I would not cry at the prospect of having to say goodbye to these boys. Not yet. “I do not want to start something with someone who has to go on stage every night and sell fantasies to a bunch of underage girls. I’ve seen you up there. The innuendo charged lyrics. The hip thrusts. The looks filled with lust that you all shoot at the gorgeous girls in the front row. The fact that you know when they go home that night, whether it’s at the mercy of their own hands or someone else’s, you’re going to be who they’re thinking about.” I turned so that my back was facing him, afraid that if he saw the emotion on my face, he’d know what to say to get me to change my mind.

“You would be jealous.” He filled in.

Done with the topic at hand, and not willing to admit out loud that he was right, I pulled the t-shirt I was wearing over my head and dropped it on the floor next to his feet. Turning around to face him again, I shot him a look, challenging him to continue the conversation.

“You can try to keep talking about this,” undoing the button on my jeans and sliding the zipper down, I kept going. “While I continue to take off my clothes,” I pushed the denim down over my hips, wiggling as the fabric fell to the floor and I stepped out of them. “Or, you can join me in the bedroom.“ I reached back to unhook the clasp on my bra, letting the material fall to the floor with the rest of my discarded garments.

Standing in front of him in a pair of lace boy shorts and nothing else, I took a step away, heading closer to the door that led to my room. I heard him growl, letting out a string of curse words before he rushed forward, picked me up, and threw me over his shoulder.

Notes

Chapter Title lyrics: "No Boundaries" by Kris Allen.