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Charly

Chapter 13

Charly and the crew drove to the venue of tonight to set up the stage. The crew of the stadium had done quite a good job setting up the main stage and One Direction’s crew would just add the lights, tech and the long runway into the crowd because of the short time slot. It amazed her every time in which short time period they could set up this gigantic stage. And it amazed her even more that the lads could run up and down this endless seeming runway all night long, almost every night. She was even getting out of breath while rushing through the airports when they have to catch their connecting flights.
Charly walked down the runway slowly, shielded her eyes with her hand from the sun and imagined all the empty space being filled with people, all the way up to the last row of the seats in the stands. She felt like a proud mum thinking that the lads could fill this stadium up on their own.
As she reached the end of the runway, Charly climbed off the stage and wandered over the space for the crowd while it was still empty. The people, mostly girls, that came to the concert would probably not perceive the amazing view that was given. She walked until she was in the middle of the arena and just lay down. The sun was shining bright and the sky was almost cloudless. For a moment she could zone out the crew that was working on stage and just enjoy the warmth of the sun on her face.
So this is where the people would be staying while watching the concert. Some of them were already outside waiting and when the security would open the gates and they would rush in. If Charly was still laying here they would probably just run her over, stomping on her body like she wasn’t there. The sheer thought of a thousand feet trampling over her brought a lump to her throat and her heart started racing. She suddenly felt like she couldn’t breathe anymore, like those thousands of feet were already standing on her chest. Charly quickly sat up and tried to calm herself but it wouldn’t work. Charly panted quickly and started shaking. Oh my god, is this a…panic attack?, she thought to herself.
She got up on the shaky legs and almost ran to the backstage area because she needed to get away from that wide open space, but also because she didn’t want the crew to know what was going on. She stumbled along the hallway down to the dressing room of the band. They should be on their way to an interview with the local newspaper, so she could just freak out on her own. She actually didn’t know what to do since this was the first time she was experiencing something like this. She suddenly tried to think what always happened in a movie when someone got a panic attack. Didn’t they always have a bag or something to breathe into? Charly couldn’t find a bag to breathe into, so she just covered her mouth with her hands and went into a squat position.
It didn’t matter what she did, she didn’t feel better. Her head was spinning, her heart was racing and stars appeared before her eyes. “Shit, shit, shit”, she said and felt her mouth getting dry.
“Hey Charly, I just forgot my phone…are you alright?”, Niall appeared in the door, looking at the back of Charly. “No”, she said truthfully and sounded out of breath. Niall came round and also went into a squatting position in front of her. “I…think…I’m…having…a…panic…attack”, she said while heavily panting. “Really? How? Why?”, Niall asked shocked. He had never experienced something like that and didn’t know how to act either. “Can I help you somehow? Tell me what to do!”, he kept asking since she wasn’t answering. “I think you…I need you to…hold me…really tight”, she said and reached for his hands. “Oh…okay.”, Niall answered, unsure what to do next. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and grabbed his other hand on the back. “Like that?”, he asked. “Tighter”, she said and he pressed her against his chest. He sat down on the carpet and pulled her on his lap.
Niall sighed. This was not really the way he imagined being close to her. Although he enjoyed holding Charly in his arms, the situation was definitely not the one he always dreamed of. He quickly lost his thoughts. He shouldn’t think that way. He couldn’t say how long he was sitting there, holding Charly tight to his chest, her, breathing into her hands, but she stopped shaking and began to breath normal again. Charly also felt her heart beating at a normal speed again.
Suddenly she felt very tired and was glad that she had Niall to lean against. “Are you okay now?”, he asked in a whispered tone. “I think so, thanks”, she said but didn’t think of getting up. “Was this your first panic attack?”, he asked. “Yes”, she replied. “And how did you know what to do? I mean that holding you tight would help you to calm down?”, he asked. “I saw it on Grey’s Anatomy”, she said and looked up at him smiling. “And do you know why you had it?”, he kept asking, mostly to keep the conversation going and being able to keep holding her. “It’s such a dumb reason actually”, she said and sat up, but kept her position on his lap. It was actually quite comfortable. Niall on the other hand moved his hands down on her back and around her hips. As long as she wouldn’t say anything he wouldn’t miss the chance of being close to her.
“I was out in the arena where the crowd would be standing and lay down on the ground to enjoy the sun and so on. And then when I imagined that all the fans would come running in and probably run just over me, I…just started panicking”, she explained to him and felt a lump to her throat again. “I can’t even talk about it without feeling panicky again”, she said and took a deep breath. “Oh wow, yeah, the thought of those masses can be quite fearful. I had that at the beginning a lot. Actually all of us 5 had that, some coped better with it than others”, Niall told her and paused. Charly looked at his face. “You look like you want to say something. Come on, spill”, she said and was happy for every distraction she could get.
Niall remained silent at first. He wasn’t sure if he should actually say it. “Well, I had thought that you panicked because of your ex or, better said, the way he had ended it. It was quite a shocker and I am surprised how well you cope with it”, Niall said and looked at her face to see how she took it. “Yes, that was quite heavy, but no, it’s not the thing that gets me to panic. It makes me questioning myself actually, but the makeover that Lisa gave me is helping quite well”, Charly said and smiled lightly. The fact that she hasn’t been enough woman to keep Ethan had given her self-confidence a crack.
Niall scanned her face while she said that. Her face was so pure, so naturally beautiful. “I’m sure you will find someone that will appreciate you the way that you are and I don’t mean the styled up version of Charly, but the real Charly. Something that just feels right and effortless…and it might even be right in front of you without realizing it”, he said and looked down. Charly immediately thought of Liam and the way he had looked at her as he had slept with her. She wasn’t sure if he was THE ONE, but she was sure he was the one giving her the best sex she had ever experienced.
“You’re sweet, Niall, thank you. You’re such a good friend”, she said and hugged him before she got up. Ouch, that hurt, Niall thought to himself and got up himself. “Here’s your phone”, she said and pointed to the couch. “Oh yeah”, he said and walked over to the couch as well. They both bended down at the same time to get the phone and bumped their heads again, this time on the other sides. “Ouch”, they both screamed out. “That will add another lump to the head”, Niall said and rubbed the part of his forehead. “Then you can show your inner devil”, Charly joked and rubbed her forehead too. At least he didn’t hit her as hard this time.
“I’m sorry I kept you from going to your interview. I’ll text Paul right away to let him know you helped me with something and were not wandering around”, Charly said and took out her phone and started typing.
“Let’s get you to your interviews”, Charly said when she had finished and put her phone back into her back pocket of her jeans. She grabbed her stuff from the couch and left with Niall. She still felt a bit weird from before, but Niall had really helped her calming down again. So she was very happy that he had been there for her.
They had to wait for their taxi between the tour busses because so many fans were waiting outside. For now, they hadn’t seen Niall. “You’re sure your better now? If you need to lie down, you can stay here. I will find my way to the interviews”, Niall made sure Charly really was okay. “No, I’m good, thanks. Also it’s part of my job to take care of you”, she said, winked and poked his ribs with her elbow. “Awww, that’s cute. But we also take care of you, we’re family”, he said and put his arm around her shoulders. He really wanted to keep the contact as long as it wasn’t weird. “Thank you, Niall. You’re cute”, she said and pressed herself at his chest for a split second to return the embrace. “Do you want another hug?”, he asked smiling and winked at her. “No, I’m good”, Charly waved off. “Sure? One says, I give the best hugs around here”, Niall asked and wiggled his eyebrows. “That’s true. The one before wasn’t that bad either, but I couldn’t really ‘enjoy’ that”, she told him and did the quotation marks with her fingers.
Niall opened his arms and so did Charly and then he hugged her tight. They stood there for a few seconds before they let go. If it was up to Niall, they would have stood there forever like this, but it was Charly who broke the hug. “NIAAAAAALL!”, they heard girls screaming and then some others cheering. Charly and Niall both looked up at the fans that were waiting outside the arena. The back entrance area where they had parked the busses was at a lower level than the public entrance. So the fans were looking down on them over the railing at the main entrance. Niall waved at them what made them scream even more. Charly saw so many phones and cameras that were taking pictures of Niall that she could barely see the faces of the fans.
At that minute, the taxi finally arrived and Niall rushed over to hold the door open for Charly to get in first, but also to get a good look of her bum in those jeans.