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THE DEATH OF ME

Look after you

Harry's POV

"She looks like absolute shit," Eleanor says the moment she walks through my front door.
"That's nice of you to say- how do I look?" Ed questions her.
"She is pale and has dark rings under her eyes and her hands shake like crazy," She goes on.
"Why is that?" Ed furrows his brows.
"Well Sam said he thinks it's the pills," Eleanor explains.
"Wait- she is still taking them? fuck! She is not supposed to still be taking them!" I yell and reach for my keys.
"Where do you think you're going?" Ed asks me.
"To knock some sense into her," I say angrily.
"You can't Harry, you promised to keep away until she is ready, you need to honor that," Ed sighs.
"This is shit! NO one is there for her!" I exclaim in frustration.
"That's not true Harry, we are all here for her, she just doesn't want us to be, so she is pushing us all away," Eleanor remarks.
"What should we do?" I inquire.
"You need o keep away, go back to your car, to racing, to what you're good at, and leave Cassie to me, I will try and talk to her again, find out what is going on," Eleanor replies.
"Just make sure you keep away from the Shack Styles," Ed smirks, nodding towards my black eye.
The night after Cassie dumped me I went to drown my sorrows at the Shack, ending up in a fist fight with some facewipe. Louis was not happy with me, and neither was Niall for that matter, who got stuck in the middle and ended up with a bad cut on his forehead.
"Did you tell her about the race?" I ask, and watch her nod. I know Cassie probably won't show up, but I am hopping she will. I haven't told anyone she ended things, still hoping we might get back together. If she won't show up though, the press will question why, and it might get ugly for the both of us.
I decide to drive down to the tracks and sit with Zayn, maybe it's what I need, a fast drive, to get my mind off of her.
"I'm heading to the tracks," I tell Eleanor and Ed.
"Say hi to Zayn, I need to get to work as it is," Eleanor gets up.
"When are you going to be back? I have a meeting later, but maybe we can all meet up after?" Ed questions.
"Sounds good, let me know where and when," I say, waving goodbye and shutting the front door after me.
I get in my car and sit in it for a moment. I know I promised to keep away from her, but she isn't doing very well is she? It's quite mean to know she is in a bad place and not reach out though, so I decide to head over to Cassie on my way to the tracks even though I had promised not to.
I park my car behind Sam's and run up to the front door. After two knocks the door is opens and Sam stands in front of me.
“Thank god,” he breathes out shifting to the side, making some room for me to get in through the door.
“Is she home?” I question in a grumble.
“She’s asleep,” He replies, “I don’t know what to do, I don’t know her well enough to read her, and come up with a solution to the way she is lately,” Sam goes on in quite a frantic tone.
I don’t answer, I just turn to the stairs and climb up two at a time. The door to Cassie’s room is shut. I don’t knock, even though I know I should. I open it silently and peek in. It is dark, the blinds pulled closed. I let my eyes adjust a moment before creeping in. I stand over her little body which is laid on the bed under the duvet and sigh. She would seem so peaceful if I didn’t know her as well as I did. But I have seen her sleep and I can tell she is not at peace. Her jaw is clenched in her sleep and so are her fists, she has dark circles under her eyes and a slight crease between her eyes which I want to smooth with a kiss. However I don’t kiss her afraid I might wake her, so instead I smooth out her duvet and make sure she is well covered. When I turn to leave I notice the pills by her bed. Without another thought I take them and slip them into my pocket. If what I was told is true then she should not be taking these anymore.
When I reach downstairs I head straight to the door, not in the mood to talking to Sam.
“Where are you going? Aren’t you going to help me? Talk to her?” He calls after me.
“I won’t be much help to you, she wants nothing to do with me,” I sigh and with that close the door after me.

“These are not the pills the doctor gave her,” I play with the bottle in my hand leaning on my car while Zayn’s upper body leans over the engine.
“What are you going to do about it?” He question, peeking over the hood.
“I’m not sure I can do anything about it,” I through the bottle of pills into the bin.
“Sure you can,” He drops the hood and moves to stand next to me.
“She dumped me Zayn, I’m the last person she wants help from,” I say in an aggravated tone.
“Right and still, look- all I can tell you is if it was Perrie I would never stay away- no matter how much she pushed me away. I would be there every moment of the waking day to make sure she is alright,” He states.
“Fuck it! Don’t you think I want that too? But this is not something I can do! She just lost the only parent she ever knew- this- those pills- the addiction? It’s all a side effect of her lose,” I kick at the ground in anger.
“What do doctors do with side effects?” he asks me in ease.
“How the hell should I know? I’m not a doctor,” I spit.
“They find something to stop the side effect, they find something else to help the patient instead of the thing that isn’t working.”
When I don’t answer Zayn exhales and pushes off the car.
“It’s set and ready for tomorrow, you kick Ben’s arse- you hear me?”
“You’ll be there right?” I ask him.
“Won’t miss it for the world,” He smiles.
Zayn is right though. Cassie got the pills for her pain- for the pain of the injury, though she used it for the pain of her lose and that caused her to push all of us away and get addicted to those things. I need to find a different way to help her.. but what? How?


I can hear the people cheering calling my name, but I am too scared to go out. I am afraid to see the faces, the faces of my friends and not see her face among them.
“Harry, it’s time,” Someone tells me tapping my back, wanting me to move. It’s time. I nod and pull my helmet over my head, concealing myself from the people.
The crowd explodes when I walk out, way too much noise for such a small crowd.
The first one I notice is ED, his ginger hair shining in the winter sun. Next to him are the others, and just as I reach my car my heart stops. Next to Eleanor a small figure stands. She is wearing my beanie and seems unhappy, but nonetheless she is here. She came. I smile even though she can’t see it and get into my car.
When the shot is sounded I go! I zoom past them promising myself I will not lose. Because winning will set things right.

I won the race, making Ben very unhappy but I don’t give a shit, the only thing I can think about is Cassie. She came. She is here. My heart rate is faster than it has ever been in a race.
When I reach my friends they are all smiles, congratulating me on the win.
“Where is she?” I look past their heads looking for her blonde one.
“Over there with the pothead,” Ed points.
“Don’t go Harry, she made it to the race, if she will feel like talking to you she will come over,” Eleanor stops me as I pick up my foot to pace over to her.
“She is smoking,” I remark as we watch her.
“Yes she is, and those pills you threw, she got a new bottle,” Zayn says.
“Dammit!,” I smack the wall.
“Hey, you should be happy she came,” Eleanor whispers, “It’s a start.”
“It is, how did you get her to come?” I question.
“I didn’t she called me, asked to come with me, but then in the middle she walked away- I think they know each other and she just walked over to him without,” Eleanor tells me.
“Find out who he is!” I demand.
“I have an Idea,” Ed smiles.
“What are you smiling about?” I inquire wanting to walk over to where she’s at and kick that boy out of here and all the way to the middle east.
“Why don’t you let me try and talk to her for a change?” Ed shrugs, “I might be able to get through to her.”
“What are you planning on doing? Walking up to her and just start a chat?” Zayn questions.
“Yep, wroth a shot don’t you think?” He replies.
I watch as Ed walks over to Cassie and that bloke. He kisses her cheek and shakes his hand. After a moment the guy pulls out a cig, handing it to Ed, and then with a wave walks away.
I can’t stand here anymore so I stride over to where they are both smoking away.
“What the fuck!?” I question. As I get to them, Cassie takes out a pill and pops it into her mouth.
“What?” She raises her brow.
“You got more?” I snatch the pills out of her hands.
“What do you mean? Give them back!” She demands angrily.
“What is wrong with you?” I yell.
“I came to see you race and all you do is yell at me?! Why did I bother coming?” She snaps.
“You’re getting high with potheads- instead of watching the race!” I shout.
“I’m not doing drugs dickhead!” She spits.
“So what would you call those pills then?” I demand an answer.
“Screw it Cassie! You want to smoke? Take your fucking pills? Fine but I promise you! I’ll be there everytime to ruin your buzz!” I promise.
“Ed- please take me home- and Harry? You can fuck off!”
She turns and walks away. Ed gives me a wink and walks after her, leaving me and the rest of our friends watching after them.

Notes

What do YOU think will happen next???
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Comments

@Allie Miller
Wow! Thank you for reading poppet! you're the best!
Hope you're enjoying it xx

@raylee
I finished it and starting sequel yay

@Allie Miller
Glad you're enjoying it xx there is a sequl out too when you're ready =))

Oh Em Gee!!! Absolutely love this

I'm only on chapter 2 and already loving it!!!!