THE DEATH OF ME

"Nan, we don't need so many apples," I tell her putting some back.

"Why not? I thought you like apples," She replies.

"I do, but I'm the only one that eats them so it's a waste to get so many, I won't be able to eat them all before they go bad," I can't help but laugh.

She feels so bad about leaving me on my own that she is determined to buy the whole store.

"Well that is because you're not telling me what you want," She exclaims at me.

"Let's get what we usually get," I smirk and hug her.

Spending all this time with Harry made me forget how much I missed Nan, and I was truly happy to have her back.

"I've missed you too doll," She kisses my cheek.

My phone beeps and I glance at the message.

From Harry: Where you at?

To Harry: Shopping with Nan.

I put my phone away and continue following Nan, pushing the cart for her.

"What would you like for supper love?" Nan turns, putting some chicken in the cart.

"I'm up for anything really, you pick," I tell her.

When we are done with the shopping we pace back to the car, Nan going on about Linda's cold she is convinced she has.

"Oi groupie!"

I recognize that voice and my blood goes cold. No, not know.
I don't turn, but Nan does, and I grimace.

"Who is that punk?" Nan whispers to me, pulling her face. I roll my eyes at her use of that word- punk.

Ben laughs, and so does the people with him. I don't turn, just load the food in the car as fast as I could.

"Who was he shouting at?" Nan pushes.

"Don't know.. probably drunk Nan," I sigh. That answer makes sense to her, and she climbs into the driver's seat.

The drive home was quick, the market only being a few minutes away.

I recognize the motorbike parked on the side as Nan parks and I knew he must be waiting on the steps leading up to the house.

"Haya Harry," Nan greets him with a smile.

"Please, let me help you," He hurries up to her, to get the bags from the car.

"Oh what a dear you are, Cass love, why don't you go unlock the front door for this young man?" Nan offers and I do, not missing the smirk on Harry's lips.

"I didn't know you had plans today?" Nan says when putting things in the fridge.

"Didn't you tell her Cassie?" Harry rushes to say.

"Must have slipped my mind, since I was having so much fun with Nan," I answer evenly.

"Harry can I get you anything? Cassie why don't you offer your friend anything?" Nan scolds me.

"Because, you just did," I shrug.

"No thank you, we will be late if we don't leave though," Harry grins.

"Oh, we wouldn't want that, run along then, will I see you tonight?" Nan questions.

"Sure, we have dinner plans remember?" I hug her.

"Yes, I do, Harry care to join us?"

"I'd be delighted," He agrees and we are out the door.

"So, what are you really doing here?" I turn to Harry as he hands over my helmet.

"I missed you," He shrugs and hops on.

"Not really," I am not buying this answer, this is not like Harry to act this way.

He helps me on the bike, and as soon as I wrap my arms around his torso we are off.
It's not long before Harry stops outside his apartment building and once again I am amazed by its size.

"I think Ed might still be sleeping," Harry whispered as he unlocked the door.
The lounge was dark, and as expected, a sleeping Ed was spread on the sofa.

"Harry don't," I whisper harshly as he picks up a pillow from the floor. Harry drops it on Ed's head making him jump.

"Fuck you! Sloppy cunt!" Ed curses at him, making Harry laugh.

"It's time to get up you lazy bum, and stop the use of dirty words in front of Cassie," Harry ruffles Ed's ginger hair.

"Cassie! Fancy seeing you here," Ed grumbles in a voice full of sleep.

"Good morning sunshine," I smile.

"It's not morning it's almost past noon!" Harry remarks, pulling me after him to his room.

"That was mean," I shake my head, as Harry closes the door behind us.

"No! You are mean," He replies pulling me to him, placing his palms on my waist, sending sparks of electricity down my spine.

"How's that?" I crinkle my nose at him.

"Because we are together for almost an hour already and you still haven't kissed me hello," He touches my chin.

I am a little surprised by that, not sure what has come over him, but I tilt my head to let my lips meet his, as he lifts me up a little. I wrap my arms around his neck not to lose my balance.

"What did you do this morning?" I question once he lets me go.

"Not much," He shrugs.

"What's up Harry?" I say folding my arms, determent to find what it is he is hiding.

"So.. I thought maybe I can take you today to-" But he doesn't finish his sentence, his phone ringing out of his pocket.

He takes it out, and is about to turn it off when his eye catches the number on the screen.
I see a frown form on that face of his, as he holds up one finger to ask for a moment as he answers.

I exhale and sit down on his bed, watching him.

"What?" Is the way he answers the call, and I cringe from the venom in his voice.

"She comes!" He demands, but by the look on his face the voice on the other side won't have it.

"Fine! Ten minutes arsewipe," Harry hisses and shuts the call.

"Fuck!" He growls, smacking the wall with his fist.

"Harry?" I ask quietly, not sure what or how I should react right now.

"Up," He orders me. Normally I would protest, but by now I knew better to argue with him with that look on his face.

He marches us out to the lounge where Ed was sat on the sofa, a bowl of cereal in his hand, the telly on low.

"Ed, I need to go, Cassie is staying with you- You don't leave this flat do you understand?! You stay with her until I get back! Do NOT unlock the door! For no one!" And just like that he is out, locking the door after him.

I am stood in place not sure about what just happened.

"What is that all about?" Ed raises his brow.

"I have no clue, one minute he started telling me about this idea of his about us doing something today, and then he gets this call that made him fume and march out of here like that," I gesture to the door.

"Wow, and you don't know who that was?" He frowns.

"No.. But Harry said 'she comes' which I think he was referring to me but then I guess the person refused since I am still here,"

Ed doesn't say anything to that but he seems worried which is making me worry.
He gets up then and places the bowl in the sink. When he heads back to the sofa he grabs his guitar with him.

He takes it out of its case, and I scoot over and sit next to him.

"Can you play?" He questions.

"I wish!" I reply, and Ed smiles a wide smile.

"Come on then, it's not that hard, look," He places his fingers on the neck and explains.

"These are the bars, here is where you place your fingers to form chords. You see this? It's C chord," Ed strums the strings, and the guitar wakes to life.

After showing me a few more chords, he places the guitar in my hands. It's my turn to try.

At first it is hard for me, my fingers being too small and short, but Ed refused to let me give up, and in the end I got it. It wasn't that sharp but he said that with practice I will get better.

We played with the guitar for a while forgetting about Harry and his disappearance.

I was still slow moving my fingers from chord to chord, but I was getting better, Ed saying I had a gift and I should pursue it.

"Gosh it's late, and Harry and I promised my Nan we will join her for supper.. Where is he?" I pass Ed back his guitar.

He has nothing to answer me with, so he keeps quiet.

"I really need to get back.. Do you want to join us for supper?" I suddenly think of inviting him to join.

"Umm.. Isn't it somewhat a last minute invitation? Would your Nan be all right with that?" He questions.

"Sure! Let me call her to let her know you're joining and that we'll be a little later," I take out my phone and call home.

After letting her know about Ed joining, I get to my feet and pace the room while trying to get a hold of Harry.

"He won't answer me! I don't like this! He can't just bring me here, and then run off without another word and ordering us not to leave!" I exclaim in frustration.

Just then I hear the lock turn, and both Ed and I turn to see who it might be.

"For god's sack it's about bloody time!" Ed says when Harry enters, and then I gasp.

"What happened?"

His eye was swollen, and he had a cut on his cheek bone and his lip was busted.
Harry shuffles in and sits down on the sofa. I rush to the kitchen and get frozen beans out, and hand it over to him.

Harry takes it and slumps it to his cheek, closing his yes.
I sit down beside him, not sure what to do. He then shifts, laying his head down on my lap. I let my hand stroke his curls, knowing he likes that.

Ed gets a wet kitchen towel and hands it to me. I wipe softly at the stained blood on Harry's cheek and chin.
He grumbles but I ignore him.

"I guess I should call Nan and cancel," I sigh, after a moment.

"No! Let's go," Harry sits up.

"Harry look at you! We can't let Nan see you this way!" I state.

"Let me take a shower, I'll be ready in 5 minutes," He stands and lets the frozen package fall on to the table.

Ed and I watch as he walks away. I can tell the injuries to his beautiful face aren't the only ones. He is slightly limping, making it obvious there are more.

I look up at Ed and he shakes his head at me, telling me this is not the time to ask questions.
For the first time I am fearful, feeling hopeless and out of the loop. I am afraid for Harry, remembering those articles I read some weeks ago. Could they have been true? How else could one explain those cuts? I wish he would tell me, instead of walking away that way and keeping quiet. But I trust Ed, and if he thinks this is not the time to start asking about it, then it probably isn't the time.

Though I won't let this go, I will ask him later, and I will make sure he doesn't walk away this time.

He will answer me.

Notes

So you know when sometimes you get to a point in your story that you just stop and think it's shit? So I am there now.. Donno.. I will continue updating though I hope I don't continue feeling this way about the story..

All the best
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