Secrets / Black & White / Playing for Keeps

“I don’t want to see Harry.” Lara said to Ben, almost fearfully.

He placed a comforting hand on her arm.

“I don’t think he’s required to be there. This is more to go over some legal issues with you and just to finalise some stuff.”

Lara had known about the final meeting for days, and it frightened her to the core. She really didn’t feel like seeing Julian, but even worse she didn’t want to face Harry. She had been looking through life through a film of alcohol and drugs the past week but she knew seeing Harry would undo it all until she was left with nothing.

On the morning of the meeting she had spied Ben’s stash and had secretly taken a bump of cocaine without asking him. She then spotted a bottle of something on Ben’s bedside table and had taken two long swigs, screwing her eyes shut as the liquid burned the back of her throat.

Even so, Lara felt nervous outside the boardroom, her arm reaching out to hold onto Ben’s arm. He patted her with a smile before they entered, only for Lara to freeze in her tracks
when she saw Harry also seated at the long table.

She looked at Ben accusingly but he looked back at her with an expression that indicated his surprise at seeing him too.

Harry’s eyes burned into her and she saw them lower to the sight of her linking arms with Ben. He glanced at Julian to see if he had noticed, but he was too busy staring down at his file.

“Okay.” Julian finally looked up once Lara had settled into her seat. “Can anyone believe that we were sitting here exactly a year ago?”

He smiled at the three faces before him, only to be met with three stony expressions.

“I’m happy to say that we’ve successfully come out the other end of this agreement, and that everything, well for the most part, went well and that we reached our objectives.”

Agreement. Objectives. The impersonal words made her Lara want to shake him. It didn’t escape her attention that this entire experience had started in this boardroom and was now ending in the very same place.

She tried to listen to Julian, but it didn’t take long for her to realise she was being watched.

She glanced over at Harry to see him watching her intensely.

Harry’s gaze did not waver from her face for one moment making her feel self-conscious.
She had not taken care with her appearance that day; her face make up free and pale, her hair tied up in a messy ponytail. She wore a pair of worn jeans and a bulky jacket.

Lara buried her hands in her pockets as she avoided his gaze, her skin almost burning from the hot stare. She pretended to listen to Julian, but could feel her chest tighten the more he spoke and the more Harry watched her.

She finally brought herself to look at Harry, and immediately noticed the purple bruises under his eyes. He looked as though he had not slept well, his hair an untidy mess that he had not bothered to pull back with his usual bandana.

They both looked like they had seen better days, she thought with a wry smile.
Harry saw the smile and looked unsure if it was directed at him, causing him to finally look away.

“I hear that your design course starts later this month, so I’m sure you’ve been busy preparing for it.”

Lara wordlessly turned her gaze to Julian, not bothering to say that she had not given it a second thought. Her mind started to wander as Julian rambled on, but it was a jumble of thoughts. She could really feel her buzz begin to wear off, and she longed to feel it again so it would distract her from all her pain.

“Ben tells me you’ve signed the rest of the legal documents…”

Once again Lara tuned him out. She had been willing to sign anything, if it was going to release her from their hold.

“I’m aware that the two of you have become close during this experience… but I trust you know that it’s all come to an end. There’s no going back now. I can understand you may want to remain friends, but for the time being I hope you limit that to private phone calls or emails. I don’t want any appearances in public. For all everybody knows, you have both moved on.”

His voice was intentionally firm and he looked at them expectantly as though he expected voices of protest. But nobody said a word, not even Harry.

The one sided meeting continued, until even Julian eventually got sick of the sound of his own voice.

“Okay, I think we’re done.” He said.

“Can I speak to Lara?” Harry spoke his first words. “Alone.”

Julian cleared his throat nervously.

“Okay, we’ll give you a moment.” He said with a slight emphasis on the word ‘moment’. He looked at Ben who lingered in his seat, a look of concern etched on his face.

He eventually stood and followed Julian out of the room, closing the door behind him.
Lara stood up and tucked her chair under the table.

“I’ve been calling you.” Harry said.

“I know.” Lara replied trying to walk around him.

He circled her as if he was on the prowl, an intent look on his face.

“You don’t want to talk to me?” He asked.

“Harry, I think it’s for the best.” She said until they came to a stop and faced each other. She looked at the door over his shoulder, longing to leave, when she suddenly remembered something.

“Before I forget… you can have this back.” Lara unclasped the bracelet she had received for her birthday and held it out. Harry looked at it blankly.

“It’s not mine to take.” He answered simply.

It was funny how she had faithfully worn the delicate bracelet since the day Harry had given it to her despite knowing that it had never been a real gift from him.

And how apt was it that Harry didn’t want it back.

Why would he, after all, he had never truly given it to her.

His managers had purchased it and made him give it to her. In turn it had somehow become a symbol for their entire relationship.

Despite their attempts to make it real, they had been owned right from the beginning.

Lara carefully placed it on the edge of the table.

“It’s not mine either.” She said.

She had come down from her cocaine hit from this morning, and was now itching to get out of the room so she could go home and beg Ben for more.

“What are you going to do now?” He asked.

“I don’t know. I’ve been thinking about New York a lot. I’ve always wanted to live there.”

“I didn’t know that.”

“How about you?”

“We’ll be starting our tour soon… so yeah… it’s going to be a full on year. I won’t be seeing home for a while.”

She nodded and gazed back at him vacantly. He shuffled his feet nervously.

“I just wanted you to know that I’ll always be there for you.” Harry said. “If you ever need me…”

Lara didn’t respond and it took her a moment to realise he was narrowing her eyes and looking at her closely.

“Are you okay?” He advanced toward her and touched her shoulder to take a closer look at her face.

“Yeah.” She said not meeting his eyes.

“If I didn’t know you better I’d think you were on something.”

“Well you don’t and I’m not.” She said nervously, too scared to look into his eyes in case she lost it right then and there.

“What’s he doing to you?” Harry asked quietly.

When she didn’t respond he placed his hand on her face.

“Lara look at me.”

“No.” She said helplessly looking away. “I have to go.”

She brushed past him and reached out for the door knob.

“Lara?” He gently took her arm and turned her around, and she almost bumped into his chest. His arms closed around her as he hugged her close.

She breathed in his now familiar scent, and she resisted the urge to nestle her head against him like she had done countless times before. Lara could feel his embrace tighten as if he
was guiding her to do just that, but she found that she didn’t want to play his game anymore.

Her hands made their way to his chest to push him away but she was met by resistance.

“Harry…” Lara murmured, as he held on tightly. She felt his lips on her cheek, missing her lips as she moved her head to the side. His hand reached up to turn her cheek toward him, but she held strong.

“No…” She said as his lips eventually found hers. “I said no.”

The door suddenly opened hitting Lara in the back and they both turned to see Ben.

“Okay, that’s enough.” He said grimly, placing his hands on Lara and dragging her out of the room. Harry instantly swiped Ben’s hands away.

“Take your hands off her.”

They stared at each other for a moment before Julian appeared from behind, a worried look on his face.

“Harry, what are you doing?”

“This guy isn’t even her Uncle.” Harry snapped, his green eyes flashing with anger.

“Harry no.” Lara spoke but he ignored her.

“What are you talking about?” Julian asked, looking from Ben to Lara.

“She’s just some girl he picked up along the way… they didn’t even know each other before all of this.”

“Ben?” Julian looked to his colleague. Ben moved toward Lara again, taking her by the hand.

“Lara, let’s go.” He said quietly.

“I said keep your fucking hands off her.” Without warning Harry grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed him to the floor, effectively knocking the wind out of the older man.

Ben looked up at him in shock as he shakily adjusted his glasses.

“Harry!” Lara cried.

“So what are you going to do about it?” Harry asked Julian.

“Ben is this true?” Julian peered down at him, but he was still trying to compose himself, not even bothering to stand up.

Harry gripped Lara’s shoulder.

“Tell him the truth.” He seethed.

“You’re hurting me.” Lara winced in pain.

“Why don’t you go back to Louis?” Ben spoke up, a glint in his eye.

Harry lunged toward him but was stopped by Julian.

“Harry get out!” He boomed, grabbing him by the collar and directing him toward the door.

“You need to cool off.”

The door slammed behind Harry as Ben brushed himself off and stood nervously to face Julian’s questioning face.

“I want answers.” He said looking at Ben and Lara.

“Julian, let me explain.” Ben began.

“What’s Louis got to do with it?” Julian turned to Lara, as though she should know.

Lara stared back silently. Julian persisted several times until he realised she was not going to speak. He grabbed her by the shoulders and pointed her toward the door.

“Oh just go away.” He said in disgust. “Get out and don’t bother coming back!”

“Who said I wanted to?” She muttered.

“And don’t even think about contacting Harry again.” He added.

Lara frowned before leaving a worried looking Ben to face Julian.

She briskly walked out of the building and onto the street when she froze. Harry stood next to his parked Range Rover a few feet away, a cigarette dangling from his lips.

The car door was open, but when he looked up to see her standing there, he paused to lean on it, his green eyes now watching her intently. Their eyes locked for several moments before Lara lifted her hand in a half wave. His expression didn’t change as he regarded her for a moment more before he ducked into his car and drove away.

Taking a deep breath she realised that she was finally free to go.

Lara wrapped her coat around her as she shivered in the wind and made her way down the busy London street.

THE END.

Notes

This was the last chapter of 'Secrets'.

I hoped you enjoyed my story as much as I liked writing it :)

Please leave your comments because I love to hear them and thank you to all the people (especially the regulars) who always took the time to tell me what they thought.

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