I could feel it. I could do more than that though, I could smell it. I could taste it. Even better, I could hear it. The birds were quiet. The humans were loud. So unbelievably, loud.

It was Thursday.

I hated Thursdays.

Thursdays made me want to curl up in bed all day long. They made me wish I had a cat. And a boyfriend to make me hot cocoa. A boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen. If something can go as far to make me wish that I had a boyfriend, well then let’s just say that thing isn’t at the top of my ‘good’ list.

I was currently completely swaddled in my comforter, peeking out of a small hole I needed in order to avoid dying of CO2 poisoning. I was staring at the clock, it read 9:34. I clamped my eyes shut, why was it so early?

The worst thing about Thursdays was that I was almost inevitably, eternally left with absolutely nothing to do. Peter, even before he became too busy to spend time with me, was always busy Thursdays. There were always big concerts on Fridays, which meant setting up and other important things that made Fridays run smoothly, was done on Thursdays.

Before, in what now feels like it occurred in another life, I used to visit my parents on Thursdays. They lived in a brick house on top of a small hill. It made you feel like you were lifted into another type of world, their house was surrounded by trees; my mother always loved trees. But it had been a while since the visits stopped. It’s hard to visit when there’s no longer anyone to visit.

Thursdays also used to be the days I would get a call from my brother. He was aware of my previous Thursday ritual so when that ceased, for a while he’d call from the States. Though, Luke was successful, and it was soon clear after he’d miss a call every few weeks, that he was getting busier. The calls stopped coming. We email every so often now, but other than the occasional holiday, there isn’t much communication between us.

Thursdays reiterated my feeling of loneliness.

Today was worse because with the lovely boys of One Direction making random appearances in my life, I had started feeling better. Thursdays had a way of getting rid of that however, as they always did.

It was then that I heard the muffled sound of my cell phone ringing. I groaned aloud because I knew where it was; in my bag sitting on the kitchen table. I wished that the muck that is Thursdays made me feel like nothing had importance, but I was not one who could ignore my phone.

With the comforter still wrapped around my body I rolled out of bed and shuffled toward my room door and out into the kitchen. I rummaged through my bag momentarily before pulling out my phone, the number was one I didn’t recognize but I answered it anyways.

“Goodmorning, I’m Steph from Symphony. Is this Lilas?” a woman’s voice asked.

I hesitated momentarily as I tried to remember why that name sounded familiar. Symphony. Where had I heard that before?

“Oh!” I remembered suddenly, “The shoe store!”

The woman gave a happy laugh, “Yes, I was calling in regards to your application. I was hoping to set up an interview, if you’re still interested of course.”

I dropped the comforter in excitement, “Yes that would be amazing!”

“Perfect! You wouldn’t happen to be free today would you?” she asked.

The clock read ten o’clock, “I’m absolutely free today.”

After agreeing that I should come in around 12:30 I hung up the phone and unintentionally squealed with delight. That couldn’t have just happened. The idea of getting a job at the shoe shop rushed into my mind. The most prominent thought being that perhaps Thursdays weren’t so bad after all.

You could say my outlook on the entire day had flipped 360 degrees. After getting over my jumps of joy and cheers, I made myself some pancakes. It was hard to wipe the smile from my face, even while I was in the shower I had to fight the urge to start singing. I gave in as I was getting dressed though; turning on the radio and singing along as I did my makeup, curled my hair into gentle waves, and slipped on my clothes.

I left my flat at 12:00, thinking I should get there a little early and perhaps grab a cup of coffee on the way. The clouds were a grey color so I grabbed a thick coat to wear, the weather was nice earlier this week, but as the days passed a wave of cold seemed to sweep in.

When I arrived at the shoe shop there were little customers, I assumed the weather was to blame. Or perhaps Thursdays weren’t the best day for other people as well. I had walked into the shop about three steps before I was greeted by a familiar face.

“Lilas!” the redhead I remembered to be Emilie said as she saw me.

“Hey!” I smiled, “Thanks so much for telling me to apply!”

“No problem, I told Steph you seemed really interested! She’s actually over at the front desk,” She said motioning to the blonde behind the register, “Go see here and she’ll get your interview started, good luck!”

I gave her a smile and did as she said. Steph brought me over to the small café across the street and we grabbed some coffee, making me grateful I wasn’t able to get one earlier. We sipped on our hot mugs and she asked me questions. First one about myself and what I was like, then about previous experience, schooling, standard stuff. Overall the interview wasn’t that long, we finished our drinks and she said she’d give me a call if I got the job sometime this week.

I began the walk back to my flat feeling rather proud. The wind was picking up and was beginning to bite at my cheeks. I burrowed my hands deeper in my pockets and then realized my phone was vibrating, Peter was calling.

“Hello stranger.” I piped into the phone.

“Hey L.” Peter’s voice replied. He sounded tired, and it made me change my course of conversation.

“Are you alright love?” I asked softly.

Peter sighed, “I guess I should be. I mean I got promoted,” he said before pausing, “I have to go to Spain for work for the weekend, maybe longer, they’re having me leave today.”

I hesitated, Peter’s never had to travel anywhere for work before, “Isn’t that good?”

“Extremely,” he agreed, “But, they’re talking about more than just Spain now. Apparently we’ve got contracts with other arenas around the world and they like the work I’ve been doing, say I’ve got management potential.”

It was easy to understand where this was headed, “This is what you’ve wanted Peter, don’t let anything hold you back.”

We both knew that what I really meant to say was don’t let anyone hold you back… and by anyone I meant me. Peter and I were very much like each other’s family, on top of being my best friend, and you could even say I had a love for him I would never be able to share with anyone else.

“My trains here,” he said.

He was leaving now. Peter didn’t like confrontation, which is why I understood why he called at the last minute to tell me. It wasn’t fair but I wasn’t meant to make him change just because I didn’t like the way he handled things. I wasn’t that person for him. That person would be the one he married, but I would always be his best friend, letting him be who he is. Regardless.

We said goodbye and I wished him luck and told him I loved him. He said the same back.

That didn’t mean that I wasn’t upset, however. And as if the world wanted to let me know it was okay, it began to rain just as tears started to fall from my eyes. Lightly at first, until the rain came all at once and I was completely soaked.

My outlook on Thursdays had returned to what it had been earlier.

I hated them.

I was nowhere near home, the streets held a few brave pedestrians with umbrellas and a few cars, but other than that it was quite empty. I didn’t try to stop the tears from falling, I didn’t try to shield myself from the rain. I felt bogged down on the inside and out, and I wanted nothing more than to collapse on the sidewalk right there.

I had to wipe my eyes in order to see, and it was then I realized where I was. I looked up the stairs that led to a familiar place. Without thinking I marched up them and inside, the elevator took me to the third floor and then I walked down the hall to the right door.

I was basically numb from the rain and cold that I didn’t even realize I’d knocked until the door opened. I was frozen, as was he.

“Lilas, you’re crying,” he said delicately.

I sniffled, “No, its just, it’s pissing rain outside.”

“That may be true but your eyes are telling the whole truth,” his soft words continued, “Come inside; we’ll get you warmed up,”

I looked up and into his green eyes then, I felt so terrible I didn’t care that he was able to see I had been crying. I knew going home to an empty apartment would only make me feel worse, therefore just this one time, an afternoon would Harry would be okay.