My heavy footfalls could be heard in hall, echoing and rebounding off of the walls as I tumbled into the arms of my grandfather, nearly knocking us both over. His rough laugh sounded in my ears and I closed my eyes, feeling the warmth of his embrace and smelling the old spice cologne on his shirt. He smelled and felt exactly the same as I remembered, making me squeeze even harder. I felt him shake with laugher.

I let go of my grandfather, whose blue eyes twinkled in happiness at me before I jumped on my grandma, who was the prettiest grandma I had ever seen. She smiled and embraced me, smelling of baking and Chanel No. 5. My grandmother was the best woman in the entire world besides my mother, standing at a short 5’2 with her long, silver hair pulled into a bun. She was beautiful still.

“How is my little dove?” she asked me in her thick British accent as I pulled away. I beamed up at them, so glad they were coming to the concert that was only a few hours away.

Once again I found myself feeling rushed and stressed. We had only landed a few hours ago, heading straight to the venue and straight into sound tests and running the show. Thankfully, we had the most skilled team in the entire planet, and everything was going off without a hitch. I was so impressed with the crew and everyone back stage that I had dedicated an hour of my time running around and thanking them, learning their names even.

“I’m doing good, as you can see.” I spread my arms out, addressing the backstage hallway in which many crewmembers moved about. “I missed you guys so much! I’ve been wanting to come visit for ages now, but obviously it’s easier said than done.” I began walking with them towards my dressing room, knowing I had to begin getting dressed soon. I had a million different outfit changes.

“Of course, dearie,” My grandmother said, patting me on the back with a smile. “We are so proud of you, Bentley.”

My grandpa rolled his eyes at my grandmothers sentimentality and said, “Are you nervous?”

I swallowed down the truth, shaking my head at him, even though I was scared shitless. “Course not, Pap. It’s me you’re talking too.”

“Which is exactly why I’m asking,” he said, seeing through my bullshit. My pap could see through my lies like they were made of glass. “You, Bentley Rae Slade, are a perfectionist and you have panic attacks when something isn’t done correctly.”

“Is that why she acts so crazy?” a voice called. I looked away from my grandpa to Harry who approached us, smiling his dazzling little smile and sticking his hand out to my grandfather. I watched with wariness, knowing that my grandpa was not exactly the easiest person to approach. “Good afternoon, sir. I’m Harry Styles and I must say your granddaughter is wicked talented.”

My grandpa surprisingly seemed amused and shook Harry’s hand. “Alaric King, you may call me Rick. This is my wife Elizabeth.”

“Please to meet you.” My grandmother shook Harry’s hand, her face looked extremely pleased. It seemed he had somehow charmed them, but with a single look into his green eyes, there was no chance. “You are part of the boy band, yes?”

We began walking towards my room again, Harry walking alongside of my grandmother. His hands were in his pockets but his posture was casual as I studied him, wondering what on earth he had up his sleeve here. “Yes ma’am. I consider myself one of the luckiest blokes in the world. I’ve had the opportunity to make friends of a lifetime.” He cast his eyes over to me and smiled, making me narrow mine. He was being extremely polite.

“Yes,” I concluded, stopping as we approached my dressing room. “Harry and the boys have welcomed me quite nicely into their group of friends, which, I’m sure Harry has to get back too?”

“Trying to get rid of me, eh?” He cocked an eyebrow, smirking.

“Yes.”

He held up his hands in a white flag. “Alright, I’m sorry. They said your grandparents were coming to see the show so I wanted to meet them and formally welcome them to the show and wish that they had a good time, is all.”

“That’s quite nice of you.” I glanced at my Gram, whose tone had taken on a curious quality as she threw a glance at me. “Bee didn’t tell me she had such lovely friends.”

“I’m sure, she isn’t one to brag.”

I opened my door and gestured for my grandparents to go inside, both of who were smiling at Harry’s comment. I glared at him, not understanding how a simple greeting had one over both of my very stubborn, very critical grandparents. “Goodbye, Haz.”

“See you later,” He said to me, giving me a look I was beginning to know all to well. It was a mixture of triumph and mischief. To my grandparents he said, “I do hope you enjoy the show. It was a pleasure to meet you both.” I watched as Harry walked away, leaving me confused and stumped. He was nearly impossible to get a hold of understanding wise. The moment I thought I had figured Harry Styles out, he surprised me again.

“He’s a fine young man,” My grandmother commented lightly, but I knew her statement was loaded. I glared at her, walking into the dressing room past them as they chuckled after me. “He had a good handshake,” was all my pap said as I sat down in the make up chair, crossing my arms as Vee and Bry giggled at me. I sneered in return.

My team began working on me as I caught up with my grandparents. I had missed them so much and it was a weight off of my shoulders to know that they would be here through the night, listening to my music. I was so nervous for the night to began that as Bry painted my nails, he had to murmur for me to stop trembling.

My mother joined us after sometime, thrilled to be in the same room as her loved ones. We talked for hours about my success and everything I had missed with the family over here in London, and they assured me that tomorrow I would be able to visit my few cousins before I left later that night.

As the time to go on stage came closer and closer, I got more and more anxious, checking the clock every five minutes and biting my lip to the point where Vee snapped at me once. I could just imagine the thousands of people, screaming and all the lights flashing. I had performed before, but I had never done an entire concert. What if I fell? What if I forgot the words or ran out of breath?

My pap must have seen the questions flitting through my mind, as he got up from the couch and stood next to me, looking at my in the reflection of the mirror. Vee said nothing, working around him easily, which I was thankful for. He smiled at me and said, “I thought you weren’t nervous? Looks like that was a load of rubbish.”

I laughed nervously. “Yeah, well I like to pretend that I’m brave, alright?”

He chortled and said, “Bentley, you are one of the bravest young women I have ever met. I am absolutely chuffed to be right here right now, I promise you. You are a brilliant performer, dove.”

My grandpa did have a point. If I wasn’t good enough, or if they were worried about me messing up, I wouldn’t be here. I wouldn’t be thousands of miles away from home, getting dressed for a huge concert, with people that loved me ready to cheer me on. Someone of those fans outside, screaming and holding posters, would be for me. And even if this was a concert for a the boys, I was a part of the experience. I was part of the attraction.

“Alright,” Vee said as I slipped into white skinny jeans, paired with a simple white tank, layers of jeweled necklaces and bracelets and a coral blazer, matching the studded heels I had on perfectly. “You have three outfit changes throughout this, each easier than the last, alright? The second one Bry is pulling up your hair cause you’ll be dancing.” She adjusted the blazer and stepped back, looking at me and then nodding. “You look perfect.”

Bry moved her aside to touch up my make up, which was done perfectly for stage. It was darker than I normally wore it, and it was smoky eyed, but I knew from afar it would look stunning. As he told me to close my eyes, I could hear the first and foremost act go on, a small band that no one particularly new. I was next. The thought was terrifying.

“You look amaze balls,” Bry said, clapping his hands together as I opened my eyes.

“You just like balls,” I joked, turning away from him and glancing in the mirror. But he was right. My hair was pulled half up half down, braided across the back. The part that was down was curlier than I could have ever gotten my hair myself, completing the finished look.

The outfit was easy enough to move around stage in, although I didn’t have to do too much during this portion. It wasn’t until the middle part that I had to dance around a lot, and they even suggested that I throw a tumble or too in. I was forever proving myself as a gymnast. This portion of the act I would be using the mic and the stand, as well as walking here and there. The last part was the emotional music and the piano parts, in which I would end all nice and pretty only to come on later for duets.

A knock on the door sounded and a stage director stuck her head in the door. “Miss Slade we need you on platform three.”

I nodded and followed her out, kissing all my relatives on the cheek as I passed them. They left to take their places on the side of the stage, where they could see everything perfectly. I suddenly felt very alone as I walked with the stage directors, going over the lyrics in my head and remembering all the moves as well. panic began to seep in when I heard my name called and I looked up, the boys rushing over to me.

Zayn embraced me first, and I smiled, welcoming the hug. He told me good luck and then handed me a good luck bracelet that I put on my wrist immediately. Niall was after him, bear hugging me as the Irish do and insisted that I would be awesome. Liam was after Irish and hugged me tightly, telling me that I would perform amazingly, and that he knew I had it in me. Louis of course, said, “Break a leg. Literally, I don’t want to see your terrible dancing.”

I swatted at him and hugged him tightly saying, “Thanks for the support, Lou.”

Last was Harry, whose green orbs were gazing at me with an intensity that sent shivers up my spine. He hugged me tightly, and I felt myself go dizzy at his smell and touch for a moment, breaking away from him quickly as he gazed down at me. Even in heels he stood well above me. Suddenly he leaned forward and kissed me on the cheek murmuring, “For good luck.”

I felt my cheeks rush with red, but was saved by the stage manager barking at me that I needed to go on now. I squeaked a thanks to them all and wobbled after her, going as quickly as the heels would let me. not to mention it was much harder now that all I could think about was the burning on my cheek where Harry’s lips had brushed. But it was pleasant.

The stage manager led me under the stage, the roars of the crowd overwhelming as I stuck my earpiece in. She placed me on the big tapped X, reminding me not to stick my arms out before handing me a silver, jeweled mic. I took a wide stance, closing my eyes and breathing, putting my head down and murmuring a quick prayer before the platform began to rise.

The sound of my music starting and stopping- purposefully- vibrated through my chest and a sudden sense of euphoria shot through me, the adrenaline causing my hands to shake as the upbeat music began, hammering so loud that I could barely breathe through the sound waves.

The ground shifted below me and I held my breath for a moment as the platform began to rise, the noise getting louder and louder. A voice came through my earpiece for a sound check and I raised my hand over my head with a thumbs up before placing my hand down. I kept my head facing the ground for the entrance, closing my eyes and letting the sound of the screams wash over me like a giant wave on the coast of California.

The sound was like nothing else in the world and I felt myself smile as I felt the fog move in around my ankles, enveloping me in its grasp. The bass was blaring, and I counted in my head to the beginning of the lyrics, not longer scared that I would forget them. The music was a part of me, a part of everything I was. Forgetting the words would be like forgetting a piece of myself- impossible.

“Oh-oh-oh,” I began, not lifting my head. I heard myself through the earpiece over the screams and the music. I continued the next ‘ohs’ and lifted my head knocking the curls from my face and walked forward slowly toward the mic stand. Each step was pointed and smooth, going with the lyrics.

“Comin' home
The lock's broken
And the doors wide open
It's all gone, it's all gone now.”

I set the microphone in the stand, tapping my heel to the beat of the music and looking out at the crowd, seeing the thousands of lights twinkling before me like stars in the night sky. If heaven looked like whatever we wanted, I wanted my heaven to look like this.

“I look around
It's just white walls
Listen now to echoes
It's all gone, it's all gone now

Ever since you broke into me
Ever since you left with the key
I can't open up for anyone any more, any more

You took the sun, the moon and the stars
Now I'm walkin' all alone in the dark
You stole my heart, you stole my heart
Give it back to me

All the love that we made here is gone
I'm living in an empty house of cards
You stole my heart, you stole my heart
Give it back to me

King of thie-e-eves
King of thie-e-eves
You're the king of thie-e-eves
The king of, the king of

Inside I'm hollow
'Cause you carved my heart out
It's all gone, it's all gone now

Whoa-oh

'Cause you delt a cold hand
I'm stripped to nothing
Take it all, take it all yeah-yeah

Ever since you broke into me
Ever since you left with the key
I can't open up for anyone any more, any more

You took the sun, the moon and the stars
Now I'm walkin' all alone in the dark
You stole my heart, you stole my heart
Give it back to me

All the love that we made here is gone
I'm living in an empty house of cards
You stole my heart, you stole my heart
Give it back to me

King of thie-e-eves
King of thie-e-eves
You're the king of thie-e-eves
The king of, the king of”

I ripped the mic from the stand, walking across the stage, singing angrily as I walked, feeling the hatred I had for Penn all this time coming out in my singing as I moved around the stage, the lights changing and following me. I moved to every X with extreme caution.

“I'll play the victim
'Cause you planned it out
Like cops and robbers
Just surrender now

You took the sun, the moon and the stars
Now I'm walkin' all alone in the dark
You stole my heart, you stole my heart
Give it back to me

All the love that we made here is gone
I'm living in an empty house of cards
You stole my heart, you stole my heart
Give it back to me

King of thie-e-eves
King of thie-e-eves
You're the king of thie-e-eves
The king of, the king of

Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh
Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh
Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh.”

I finished the song flawlessly, smiling and gasping for air. My blood was rushing in my ears and I even laughed at the end of it, waving to the crowd as the stage lit up, the music changing into another song. I put the mic on the stand, clapping my hands over my head to the quick beat of the song, watching as thousands began clapping along with me.

I began singing the next song moving to each designated spot on the stage. I felt the sweat forming from all of the lights, but no amount of discomfort could make me wish I was off of that stage. No matter how worried I was that my earpiece would fall out, or that I would tumble in my heels, I kept moving and doing my job, an unexplainable power running through me all the while.

I ran through the next and one of my favorite songs easily. At the end of the song, I ran up the stairs to the higher part of the stage, going on the X and preparing to drop down onto a mattress where I will be yanked around in different directions to change and come back on stage for the commentary part of my performance.

The last note of the song ended and I knew on the screen behind me they would show a castle crumbling to the ground as I suddenly dropped from the stage, my breath hitching. For a brief second I was sure the mattress wasn’t there, but before I could think anymore on it I was hitting the soft mattress, rolling off and being yanked out of my close. Vees moving around me like a hurricane and Bry attacking my hair. They yelled congratulations and compliments.

Jackie shoved a water at me which I glugged down thankfully, raising my arms over my head as Vee shoved a shirt over my head. I could hear Jackie shouting that I did awesome but I ignored her for the most part, letting the other assistants put fans on my face to dry the sweat and reapply makeup.

Within minutes, I was running towards sliding door that came from under the raised part of the stage, ready to walk out. I was dressed in a black, cropped tank with a white cross on the front, my wrists adorned with black, leather bracelets. My hair had been pulled back into a high ponytail, French braids going into it. I had on a pair of simple jean shorts and converse, showing off both my toned legs and some of my torso. The outfit was a lot freeing than my other ones, and I was able to dance in it without trouble.

“Alright, go kill em,” Jackie called, giving me the thumbs up. I smiled at her and nodded, watching as the sliding doors opened, the screams greeting me again. I could have lived forever in this moment.