The next morning I wake to the displeasure of an empty bed. My bare legs are uncovered by the duvet and I squirm awkwardly until I'm once again surrounded by warmth. I settle into Harry's side of the bed, inhaling against his pillow. Might as well smell that if he's not actually here. My eyes flutter open and everything freezes when I remember what happened last night before I fell asleep. Attempting to express my feelings without him knowing the same way I did in New York, my plan was foiled when Harry looked sound asleep but was not. He had heard me and now our feelings are out in the open.

There is nothing more terrifying.

Something shuts off and it gets much quieter. Harry must have been in the shower. A minute later he's emerging from the bathroom with a towel around his waist, shaking his hands through his hair to expel the water droplets. I watch him nervously, pulling the blankets up to just under my chin. He looks up at me and smiles warmly. My attempt at a smile doesn't come close to a good one, but he just laughs a little and walks over to the bed, laying on his side next to me.

"Good morning," he says simply. He watches me carefully and I just stare up at him. I've never told someone I love them before, so I'm not really sure how to act now. He just displays a goofy smile for a moment before getting up again and walking over to his closet.

"You can shower if you want," he says calmly.

Most other guys would probably bring attention to what happened last night and I know that most girls would as well, but for some reason he doesn't. Maybe he just knows me well enough to know that I'd rather not discuss it. That makes it a little easier, I guess. His towel drops to the floor and he tugs some boxers on, my cheeks flsuhing slightly. He's completely comfortable around me. Usually I am with him as well, but everything feels so open and vulnerable between us right now in a way that it never has before.

When I don't move or respond in any way he turns and sighs heavily as he walks back to the bed. He lifts the covers over his body and lays directly beside me, his head propped from his elbow and his arm resting lightly over my stomach.

"I was going to just let it go and not talk about it for your sake, but now you're forcing me to," he says quietly, one corner of his mouth tugging up into a smile. I lift the covers over my head and he laughs softly at me. "Savannah, talk to me. I know you're feeling....well, actually I have no idea how you're feeling, but you seem terrified and I'd like to know why."

"You weren't supposed to hear me," I say finally, not uncovering my face.

"I gathered that, love. If you'd like me to pretend it didn't happen I could try, but before I do that you should know how happy I am that you said it."

"Really?" My face is still covered but I smile nonetheless.

"Please look at me," he requests gently. I slowly remove the blankets and he brushes messy hair from my face. "I know you're scared now, but you don't need to be, alright? If it helps, I was almost asleep. It could have just been my imagination."

I laugh nervously and Harry smiles fondly at me, coming even closer and laying down directly beside me. His lips brush my cheek and I allow myself to relax. This is Harry. He's right, I have nothing to be afraid of. His attempt at comforting me is definitely working. Turning so my body is facing his, I wrap one arm around his ribcage and overlap my leg with his. Our eyes lock and his fingers lightly trace along my back.

"You're safe with me," he says quietly.

"I know," I agree.

"Then why..."

"I'm scared," I whisper. My eyes flutter closed and I shuffle down a bit so I can hide my face against his chest. Both of Harry's arms wrap around me, holding my tight against his warm body. This is the first time I've ever felt the capacity for heartbreak. It's never gone this far for me and suddenly I've given Harry all the power he needs to break me into little tiny pieces.

"Falling is the scary part," he says against my hair. "You just have to let me catch you."

---

Harry left before I did this morning, but with our talk and my need for a shower I ended up being late for school. I noticed a bunch of missed calls from my brother and my father, but I'm not worried about that right now. I'm not worried at all, actually. About anything. I'm experiencing this extremely calming sense of peace ever since Harry reassured me this morning. I'm still scared, but I'm oddly at peace with that. Maybe it's okay to feel that way, maybe it's alright for me to feel so apprehensive about all of this. As long as Harry is there and I don't let myself push him away I have a feeling I'm going to be just fine. I just need him.

Throughout my first two classes I find myself unable to concentrate on anything other than him. Through his comfort this morning we never uttered those three little words to each other, and now that they're in the open I just want to say it again. I want him to know that I really do love him, that I'm not going anywhere and that even though I am scared, I'm glad he's the one that's there to catch me. After this morning I'm completely amazed at how he knows the exact right thing to say to me.

"Sav, what the hell is going on with you?" Mason asks quite loudly. I snap out of my dreamland and focus on his face as mine turns bright red from all the people turning to stare at us.

"Shut up, Mason," I hush. He rolls his eyes.

"You've been out of it all day," he says. Kylie nods her head in agreement.

"I'm just..distracted."

"I'd say," Kylie says. She looks over my shoulder and smiles slightly. "I could probably guess why."

I turn to look over my shoulder, Harry's curly hair catching my attention as he converses with another faculty member. I quickly turn back around and my face flushes. Kylie giggles a bit and when I look at Mason he's smiling as well.

"Girl, you've got it bad," Kylie says.

"Got what?" Mason asks obliviously.

"Sav is in love," she drawls. My face turns even more read and I drop my fork to cover it with both hands. "Aww, look at her!"

"Kylie," I whine. This is so embarrassing, I can't even deny it.

"Savannah's in love," she sings again.

I reach across the table and hit her lightly to try to make her stop. She laughs again and I shake my head at her, trying not to laugh as well. Mason nudges her arm and looks beside me, trying to make her stop. I frown in confusion and turn to see what he's looking at. Troy stands slightly behind me with his tray in his hands, just staring at me. He looks...pained.

"Troy..." I begin. He sets his tray on the table loudly and I quickly get up and chase after him, ignoring the stares coming from every direction of the cafeteria. His long legs carry him much faster than mine do and he's at the front doors by the time I catch up to him.

"Troy," I call. I put my hand on his arm but he just shrugs it off, continuing to walk outside and down the steps. When he's halfway down the staircase. I take his hand in mine and tug him to a stop. It finally works.

"Get off," he spits.

"What's wrong?"

"What's wrong?" he repeats, scoffing. "Sav, I know you've been completely clueless for like three years when it comes to how I feel about you, but after we slept together again I think it became pretty obvious."

"W-what?" I stammer. I knew he felt something for me, but I figured since it never went anywhere that he got over it like I did. We agreed that we would let things just happen however they played out, and things didn't play out in our favour. Now we're past it. Aren't we?

"I fucking like you," he yells, throwing his hands in the air. "I've liked you since we were fourteen and I came over to your house to hang out with Mason but spent the entire time with you instead. I've watched you constantly use guys for your own pleasure and discard them like its nothing and I've watched you completely close yourself off to any kind of relationship."

I stare down at him, completely stunned. He walks up the steps and stands in front of me on the one below me, his eyes a little higher than mine now.

"I waited and waited and when we slept together the first time I figured that was it, that was my chance. But you did what you always do and I was left with nothing. After the dance, though, it happened again and you didn't push me away. You agreed to see where it went, but then I find out you're with some other guy. And after all of my waiting now I find out that you're fucking in love with the guy. How could you not see me?"

"Troy-"

"I've always been there for you," he continues. "How did you not see that?"

"I did," I respond quietly. "I just never saw it that way."

"Why? Why him, why not me?" he asks desperately. "Explain it to me, because I don't understand."

"I...I don't know," I reply, shaking my head. He closes his eyes briefly. "I didn't choose this, Troy. It snuck up on me, I don't even know how it happened."

"Right," he says softly.

"Why didn't you ever tell me?" I whisper. I'm not sure why it even matters. It wouldn't change anything, but I just can't stand the thought of hurting Troy for all these years.

"You wouldn't have heard it. I didn't want to ruin my friendship with you. I know you better than most, and I knew you well enough to know that you weren't ready to know how I felt about you. I didn't think you were this year either, but clearly I was wrong and someone else just beat me to it," he says, looking away from me.

"I'm sorry," I breathe. He nods and shrugs his shoulders.

"It's not your fault. I should have taken my chance when I had it." He looks back at me and steps up to the same step as I'm standing on. "Who is he, Sav?"

"Troy, we've been through this. I can't tell you."

"I know Kylie and Mason know. I can see that every time I sit down with you guys you're talking about something I'm not meant to hear. It's about him. I just want to know who he is."

"I can't," I repeat. He steps closer and I take a step away, my back hitting the railing behind me. Troy can be intimidating when he wants to be, and he's definitely using that ploy now. Although I know he'd never hurt me, a small part of me is still a little afraid of him.

"What kind of secret are you keeping?" he asks lowly, narrowing his eyes at me. He doesn't seem like he's really asking, just pondering out loud. He's standing so close to me that it's making me nervous.

"Is there a problem here?"

Both of us whip our heads in the direction of the doors. Harry stands at the top of the steps, his hands clenched tight into fists and his eyes dark with anger. I look back at Troy nervously and he takes a slow breath before taking a small step back from me.

"Were you going somewhere, Mr. Phillips?" he asks, coming down the steps. Troy slowly tears his eyes from me and looks back at Harry.

"No, Mr. Styles. Just talking to my friend here."

"I think you'd both better go get ready for class," Harry commands lowly. The amount of tension between the two of them is palpable, and it's making me nervous. With the way Troy is feeling right now who knows what he'd do if he found out about us. Troy looks at me once more before trudging back up the steps, violently swinging the door open and walking inside. Harry watches him go and doesn't look back at me.

"How much of that did you hear?" I ask quietly. He half turns but doesn't look at me.

"Enough," he says lowly. With that he goes back inside and I'm left alone on the steps to contemplate what just happened here.

English is uncomfortable as hell for me, and I mentally curse Troy for completely ruining the peaceful, happy mood I was in this morning when I arrive at school. Harry doesn't look at me much and when he does you would think he doesn't even know my name. Someone is a very good actor.

As soon as class is over I bolt out of the school and to my car. Whatever Harry is upset about, I am determined to fix it. I haven't done anything wrong, so I'm sure he's just annoyed with whatever he heard Troy say. Either way I am going to ease his mind and make sure he knows that there isn't a problem.

When I get inside I'm expecting to be waiting for a while, but about ten minutes after I get there he comes inside, slamming the door a little harder than necessary. I was in the middle of making toast, so when he scans the loft and finds me he comes straight over.

"What the fuck happened?" he asks. I know the difference between when Harry is the annoyed kind of angry and when he's the really fucking angry kind of angry. When he's just annoyed or it's not so bad, he raises his voice a bit and his frustration is plain to see. When he's really angry his voice is eerily quiet and low and it sends chills down my spine. This is one of those moments.

Despite my willingness to work this out, I'm not really sure where to start with this explanation. He just waits patiently, his eyes burning holes in my soul.

"Umm..."

"Why did you chase him out?" he asks, clarifying the situation. I guess I'll start from there.

"Kylie and Mason were teasing me about...about you and he heard us and got upset," I explain quickly.

"Why did he get upset?" he continues, in his same threatening voice.

"Well it's because...he said that....well I guess he has feelings for me," I admit quietly. Harry rubs his hand over his face and I take this moment to put a little more distance between us. I can't think clearly when he's so close to me.

"So he knows you're with someone," he concludes. I nod my head. "And he's not too thrilled about that, is he? How long have you known about this?"

"Well he told me sort of after the dance and then again at that party. You know, the one where I came to see you after and I got lost and we got in that huge fight and-"

"Yeah, I remember," he says, cutting me off. I nod and bite my lip, waiting for his reaction. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I thought you already knew that," I say slowly. He did, he knew about us sleeping together after the dance during my Harry detox phase before we were together.

"I knew you had sex with him but you never told me that he likes you," he says tiredly.

"Because it doesn't matter." I step towards him and put my hands on either side of his face. "You are the one that I'm with right now. I love you and that's all that matters here."

"I don't like it," he says quietly.

"I don't either, it's a little awkward," I joke. He laughs a little and closes his eyes. "Hey, you don't have to worry about this, okay?"

"Okay," he breathes. A smile slowly grows on his lips and he places his hands on my waist, pulling me against him. "You just said you love me."

"I-I didn't..what?" I stammer. He laughs a little and nods his head.

"You said you love me," he repeats, leaning closer. As his lips brush mine he continues. "I love you, too."

I smile as he kisses me, wrapping my arms around his neck and revelling in this moment. If I knew it would feel so amazing I wouldn't have waited so long to say it. Harry lifts me up and carries me up to his bedroom, being extremely careful and tender as he sets me down on his bed and starts kissing my neck. Thankfully he wore a tshirt and blazer to school today. Sometimes the damn buttons on his shirts are just an unnecessary obstacle for me.

"Harry," I breathe. He hums in response and I gently pull his face away from my collarbone. "My phone is ringing, hold on a sec."

I lift my hips to get my phone out of my back pocket and take a deep breath before answering so I don't sound like I was just making out with someone.

"Hello?" I reach up to brush my fingers through Harry's curls and he smiles as he leans down to gently attack my neck. My eyes close and I try desperately to focus on the person speaking to me.

"Did you hear me?" the person snaps.

"Sorry, who is this?" I ask, trying to keep my voice even.

"It's your damn mother, Savannah. Where have you been?"

"Just..just with friends," I respond with effort, tugging a little on Harry's hair when his teeth graze my skin.

"Do you think we're idiots? We know you didn't sleep at home last night and I expect you back here as soon as school is over," she says harshly.

"Yeah, whatever mom. I'll be home later," I agree absentmindedly. Before she can say anything else annoying I hang up and toss my phone onto the floor, the plush carpet softening the fall. Harry's mouth is immediately against mine, tongue massaging mine and lips moving relentlessly.

"I need to be home in an hour," I breathe when he gives me a chance. He smirks.

"Oh, that's plenty of time."

Notes

so just to warn you, shits about to go down.
i think im going to be doing a sequel for this story, so im not really sure how many more chapters this one is going to have.

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