"You don't have a choice, Sav. We just finished exams and we are going to celebrate whether you like it or not! My parents are away for the weekend so we are totally having a party," Kylie says. I flop down on my bed and smile at the ceiling. Exams done. One more semester to go before I graduate. Graduation is exciting for so many reasons for me. I'll be done with high school, going to college, getting away from my parents. And Harry and I can finally actually be together.

That is, if he would call me back.

He seemed alright after I told him about the rumours at school. We agreed to keep our distance and I said I'd be extra careful when I was coming over here. That means parking down the block or at Kylie's house and just walking to the building. Which I am totally fine with, because the last thing I want is for Harry to get in trouble. But he hasn't given me the chance to prove that we can keep this a secret.

Tuesday morning I had an exam but he didn't, so he made me breakfast and I went to the school. He seemed a little off, but we've both been stressed out so I just put it on that. I haven't seen him since then, except at school, but we don't talk there anymore. He won't call me and the few texts I have gotten from him have been short and meaningless. Christmas is in just five days and we haven't at all talked about doing something for it. I don't even know what he wants. Plus, I know he's going to be in town. He told me that. I don't understand why he's avoiding me.

This is exactly the kind of situation I've been trying to avoid my whole life. I don't want to be this dependent on someone, I don't want to feel so lonely without him. Not seeing Harry for four days in a row has been like torture, but I wish so badly that I didn't feel that way. I should be able to function fine without him, but all I can do is think about him and miss him. I hate that.

"Did you hear a word I just said?" Kylie asks, snapping her fingers above my face. I sit up slowly.

"Sorry."

"He'll call, I'm sure he's just been busy," she says, a sympathetic smile on her face. I have to admit, I love that Kylie knows about this. It's so nice to be able to vent about my feelings and ask her if I'm going insane. I really need my best friend, especially since this kind of stuff scares the hell out of me.

"Maybe. I don't know. I just wish he would text me or something. I feel like he's pushing me away."

"Exams just ended, Sav. I'm sure it's nothing."

"Yeah, but whenever he's been busy he still wants me at his place. He's never asked me not to come over because he has work to do."

"Well you said his friends from England are here, right? He's probably spending some time with them."

"Yeah," I agree quietly. Louis and Eleanor go home Sunday, so he probably has been hanging out with them a lot. I just don't understand why he isn't talking to me. "Did Mase ask you to come with us tomorrow night?"

"To the board of director's thing? Yeah, he did. I have to get a dress for it, though. Do you want to go shopping?!" she asks excitedly. I laugh and nod my head in agreement. I already have my dress.

Once we're at the mall we go straight to Kylie's favourite store where she buys all the dresses she owns. She refuses to shop anywhere else for some reason.

"So which one are you wearing?" she asks from the dressing room.

"I'm not sure yet. I have this black one with cutouts that I really want to wear, but my mom really wants me to wear red or white for some reason. She brought home a white one for me, but I'm pretty sure it's actually a wedding gown."

"So? Christmas is a happy time. Black is depressing."

I just laugh as she comes out in her first selection. After rejecting the first few she finally comes out in one that is absolutely perfect. After staring at herself in the mirror for about ten minutes, she finally agrees to get it and we go back to my house. That was a lot easier than I thought it would be.

---

"Ky, someone's trying to get into your dad's study!" I shout over the music. She storms off and Mason follows to help. This is why she doesn't host parties. She gets so nervous and never ends up actually having a good time. While they deal with that I get myself a drink form the kitchen where there is an impressive amount of booze on the counter. Someone bumps into me and I quickly turn to say sorry. When I see who it is I immediately start walking away.

"Sav, hold on." Troy puts his hand around my arm to stop me from walking. I hate that we don't talk much anymore, but I can't have him thinking it's okay to treat me the way he did when he knows I have a boyfriend.

"Let go of me."

"No, we need to talk. You've been avoiding me."

"Yeah, I have!" I shout. I rip my arm out of his grip but stay there. "You kissed me, Troy. After I told you what's going on with me. You know how complicated my relationship already was, and you just made it worse!"

"Does he know about me?" he asks suddenly.

"What?"

"Does he know we slept together? And that I kissed you that night?"

One, not the other. It happened so long ago now that I just don't think it would be worth it to tell Harry. We weren't officially together at that point so...I'm an idiot. I know. I just stare at him and he suddenly takes my hand and pulls me outside. When we get onto the deck I rip my hand out of his.

"Alright, talk. You have exactly one minute," I spit. I'm not in the mood for this right now, to defend my relationship when I don't even know what the hell is going on with it. I already have enough issues with Harry, I don't need to add Troy to that list. Again.

"Look, I know you're pissed at me and I made you uncomfortable or whatever when I kissed you. But we're friends, Sav, you're one of my best friends. Can't we at least go back to that?"

"Do you still have feelings for me?"

"Yes," he says plainly.

"Troy, I can't do that to you. Or to H-..my boyfriend. I think it'd be better if we just...keep our distance."

"Sav, we only have one more semester together. Can't we just forget about everything and go back to the way things were? I can put my feelings aside, I can. I did it for two years. It just sucks not being able to hang out with you guys."

I do feel bad about that. The four of us used to be inseparable, but now Carter has kind of taken Troy's place because of everything that happened. Mason still talks to him at school, but he's never at our house anymore.

"I guess that might be okay," I agree quietly. He smiles. "But you can't try anything, I mean it. I can't deal with all of that again."

"Okay." He smiles and hugs me, a friendly hug that ends fast enough that I don't feel weird about it. "Are you going to the Christmas thing tomorrow night?"

"Yeah, are you?"

"Yeah, my mom finally got her spot on the Parent's Guild," he says, rolling his eyes. "Now my family has to go to all that stupid stuff, too."

"Well all four of us will be there at least."

"Yeah, we can make it a good time."

I laugh and start to head to the house. He follows. I have to admit, its nice to have my friend back. And it's not weird at all. Me and Troy have always been able to get over stuff pretty quickly, and things are never awkward between us when we decide that they won't be. We just move on and get over it. I'm hoping he can do that now, since I already have. It was more for Harry's sake that I didn't speak to him anymore. But, it's not fair for me to cut my friends out of my life for him. Especially since he seems to be shutting me out now.

The rest of the night goes pretty smoothly, but the whole time I feel like part of me isn't really here. I just want to be in Harry's loft, laying on the couch with him, wrapped in a blanket and watching one of his ridiculously sappy movies while we fall asleep together. Parties like this used to be my favourite thing to do, but now I just feel like I'm wasting my time. I want to see him. I miss him.

I go up to Kylie's bedroom and out onto her balcony so I can make a phone call without the blaring music to drown out any voices. I hesitantly dial Harry's number and wait.

"Hello?"

"Harry?" I ask excitedly.

"What..Savannah?" he asks groggily.

I frown to myself. "Yeah, it's me. Are you...were you asleep?"

"It's almost two in the morning, love."

"It is?" I look at my screen and face-palm. "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry! I didn't even realize."

"It's alright. Where are you? Why are you awake right now?"

"Kylie threw a party to celebrate the end of exams."

"Sounds fun."

I nod, even though he can't see me. Granted, it's two in the morning but it doesn't seem like he wants to talk to me. At all. Normally he would at least tell me to be careful or ask if one of my exes was here or something.

"Harry, is everything okay?" I ask hesitantly.

"Why wouldn't it be?"

"You just seem...I don't know." He doesn't respond, which makes me feel extremely nervous and awkward. I don't know what to do right now and I have no idea what he's thinking because he won't fucking tell me Just when we got past the whole him not sharing about his past thing he's back to not talking to me.

"Well I guess I'll let you go back to sleep," I say quietly. I feel like I'm about to burst into tears and I don't want him to know that.

"You can...you can come over if you want," he says carefully. Does he actually want me to or is he saying that because he feels like he has to?

"You're sleeping, I don't want to bother you." I want to go over there more than anything, but if he doesn't want me there that's a whole other story.

"You never bother me," he says quietly. "I just went to bed, anyway. I was out with Louis and the rest."

"Are you sure?"

"Savannah, just come over."

"Okay," I agree, laughing a little. I feel a little relieved now, but I need to see how he acts around me. "I'm at Kylie's, so I'll just walk. I'll be there in ten minutes."

"Don't walk by yourself, it's the middle of the night."

Protective Harry. I love that one. "It's not far, I"ll be fine. Everyone here has been drinking so they can't drive anyway. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine."

"Okay, just send me a few texts so I know you're okay."

"Okay," I laugh. "I'll see you soon." I love it when Harry worries about me. I've never really had anyone besides Mason worry over me, and while some girls might find it annoying I absolutely love it. It makes me feel so cared for. You have to care about someone to worry about them, right?

I walk quickly, sending Harry texts every few minutes, as promised, so he knows I haven't gotten lost or been kidnapped. I have to stop myself from running to his place. I haven't been there in so long and it feels like forever since the last time I kissed him. When I get inside the building I practically spring up the steps, walking down the long hallway and around the corner to the end where his door is. I find it unlocked, and walk straight inside and up the steps after making sure it's locked again. Harry is sitting with the top half of his torso leaning against the headboard, still awake and waiting for me. I feel like I should be annoyed or angry with the way he's been acting, but I'm just way too excited to see him. Without saying anything a massive smile breaks onto my face and I run over to the bed, jumping onto his lap and laying directly on top of him.

"Hi," he says, chuckling a little. I don't respond, just press my lips to his. His lips move lazily with mine and his fingers find my hair. Suddenly his whole body seems to react and his other hand winds around my waist, holding me tight against him while he flips us over so he's on top of me and we're laying diagonally across the bed. I'm pleased to find that he's only wearing his boxers. I, however, am wearing far too much clothing. Before I can attempt to fix that problem, though, he stops kissing me.

"What? What's wrong?" I ask breathlessly. He sighs and rolls off of me, laying back on his side of the bed again. He takes my hand and tugs me towards him, so I get under the blankets and lay beside him.

"I'm tired," he says softly, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. His eyes close and I stare up at him. "How was your exam today?"

"It was fine."

He nods, his eyes still closed. I watch him for another moment before kissing his cheek and getting up to use the bathroom. When I"m finished I grab a tshirt that was discarded on the floor, stepping out of my own clothes and sliding it on instead. When I look back at Harry he's watching me with a nervous look.

"What?" I ask him, crawling onto the bed next to him. He lays on his side facing me, one strong arm wrapping around my waist to pull me closer.

"I missed you," he says sadly. I smile slightly and put my palm against his cheek.

"Is everything okay? You've barely spoken to me these last few days."

"I've just been..." he pauses and smiles tiredly. "Nothing. I'm fine."

"You sure?"

He nods and pulls me closer, gently pressing his lips to my forehead. I want to talk about this, because I know he's lying, but this just feels so good. I just want to fall asleep in his arms. And that's exactly what I do.

Notes

so kind of a filler chapter to set the stage for the next one. thanks for all the votes :D if you're reading my other story, you k now this already but my school is going to get super crazy the next few weeks. so that means updates only when i get responses.
for the next chapter, i would like either 7 votes or 5 comments. whichever comes first :) or both. that would be fine too :P and the comments cant just say 'update!' actually tell me what you think :P

thanks for reading everyone :)